Fifty First Times: Spashley Style
by MGMK
Summary: It doesn't matter the time. It doesn't matter the place. Spashley is inevitable. Watch us prove it.
1. When You Look Me In The Eyes

She had about twenty minutes until lunch and she desperately needed it. Running late had forced her to skip breakfast and having dinner so early the previous night was finally starting to catch up to her.

She was contemplating the menu choices for her favorite Chinese restaurant when Collins, the newbie, poked his head into her office door.

"Uh…Doc?" he asked nervously, and she rolled his eyes at his decidedly unprofessional request.

"Yes _Doctor_ Collins," she purposely emphasized, hoping he'd wise up the next time he addressed her.

"I, um," he fidgeted nervously, still very fresh to this whole professional courtesy thing. "I have a patient and she's complaining about some eye irritation and her eye _is_ kind of red, but there's no inflammation and can you, um, come look?" he asked sheepishly, grounding his eyes and boring a hole with them into the tip of his shoe.

A dilemma.

She was usually a rather compassionate person but seriously, she was hungry. However, the greater good won out this time and she swallowed her initial reaction which was telling him to go screw himself.

That couldn't end well for either of them. And let's not forget the poor patient.

Besides, in fifteen more minutes she was a free woman.

For an hour at least.

"Alright, Dr. Collins. I'll check her out," she said, scooting away from her desk and standing. She tried not to pay too much attention to the blush coating his cheeks and she knew what that was about.

Someone must've already tipped him on to her…shall we say, non-attraction to men.

Oh well. That made one less guy to let down easily.

And easily usually meant hard…with a vengeance.

Dr. Karp still holds a folder over his…um, yeah, whenever she comes around.

It wasn't her fault. She wasn't really a violent person.

Her knees just have a mind of their own.

Anyway, back to Collins. He's yammering on about all the things he's done with the patient prior to asking for her assistance whole they walk to the examination room.

It's all irrelevant though because he didn't solve the problem.

Opening the door and being immediately shrouded in darkness, the prefect conditions for a proper eye examination, she immediately laid eyes on the silhouette of a young woman, probably her age.

"Hi," the woman offers, along with a bright smile.

"Hi," she replies, taking a seat on the side of the optical refractor designated for the optometrist. "Can you

Look through the lenses please?"

The other woman sat up and looked directly through the phoropter. "Now," the optometrist said. "In a couple of seconds, I'm gonna move away and I want you to try and read the eye chart. Okay?"

"Okay," the other woman nodded slightly, waiting to complete the task.

Spencer lessened the prescription magnitude and had the woman read through the chart. She completed it quickly with precision.

"C and E," the woman finished. "Is that right?"

"That's perfect," the good doctor said, taking another seat. True conundrum now. The prescription was at the right level so why the irritation?

Oh.

"Are there any allergies?" she asked Dr. Collins, surprised when the woman answered herself.

"None that I know of," she answered quickly, then looked a little sheepish as she realized the question might not have been directed to her.

The optometrist looked through the machine this time, looking at the other woman's eyes and getting stuck…well, figuratively.

They were the most magnificent color she'd ever seen, so vibrant, so beautiful, so alive.

"Oh my God," she thought. Well, she thought she thought, she actually whispered.

"What? What is it?" the other woman asked, slightly panicked.

"Oh, nothing. Nothing. I'm sorry. Your eyes they just-" Okay, not finishing that statement. "There's nothing. I'm sorry. So, no known allergies. Are you sure? Are there like pets or something that have been around you recently?"

The other woman's voice sounded amused as she spoke. "Nope. I own a cat and a dog so- you know what? Come to think of it, my neighbors did just have a new baby. Can you be allergic to babies, Doc?"

The good doctor unwittingly smiled, the eyes looking back into her own practically popping with amusement. "No, I don't think so."

There was a brief moment of silence. "That's good then when you consider I want to have some someday."

"Oh," the doctor said, pretending to still be inspecting those eyes. She kinda was, but there wasn't much really professional about her inspection anymore. "Is there a reason why you don't have any now?"

"That's a very odd question for an optometrist to ask, but since you did so so nicely I'll answer it anyway. The reason, sadly, is because I'm single. Hard to believe I know, but seeing as I am, that makes it pretty difficult to bring a child into the world."

"I see. Haven't found the right guy?"

"Wasn't looking for a guy," the woman said, and the good doctor nearly dropped her clipboard.

Dr. Collins, who was for some reason, still in the room, cleared his throat then. "I think I'll go see if I can't find some eye drops for Miss…" he consulted his clipboard. "Davies," he squeaked out, hurrying out of the room.

"He's new?" the patient asked, finally sitting back away from the machine.

Spencer blinked, moving to turn on the lights, "Yeah," she said, swallowing back. "He's a little-" She stopped talking as a body pressed up against hers, grasping the wrist of the hand that was about to turn the lights back on.

"Why don't you turn me on instead?" the brunette asked, her breath hot on Spencer's ear, her heart beating maniacally against the blonde's back.

Spencer contemplated her options.

Meh.

Who needs lunch?

---------------------------------------

Spencer was pressed up against the counter, the brunette's mouth against hers in a frenzied kiss.

And man what a kiss it was.

The smaller girl trailed her hands up Spencer's arms and gripping the lab coat that hung loosely on the frame of The Doctor. She yanked the coat from Spencer's arms, letting it fall to the floor, watching it pool at their feet.

"I'm not the only one who was being checked out, did you know that?" The woman whispered hotly against the shell of Spencer's ear.

"Uh…"

The inability to form coherent sentences?

Check.

Spencer lifted her hands to the brown locks of the woman in front of her, as the woman worked furiously with the buttons of Spencer's slacks.

Finally.

Now those can join the coat on the floor.

Ok, wait. Spencer in a t-shirt and panties while the other woman was fully clothed.

That has got to change.

And change it did as Spencer slipped her fingers to the brunette's stomach, removing the tight jeans from the thin legs of the woman.

Now, that's a little better.

But not as good as when Spencer found herself against the cold floor, fingers splayed all over her body and a leg pressing incessantly against her core.

"You're so fucking hot." The brunette hissed against Spencer's neck, placing sloppy, chaste kisses against the skin.

Yeah, Spencer ain't got nothing.

Well, a few moans. But…no real words.

Who could blame her?

She was being fucked by this incredibly hot woman. During work hours. On the cold, dirty floor.

Now wait a minute, that's just not sanitary. But as she was going to say something, the blonde felt two fingers swiftly enter her core.

All thoughts…now gone.

"God, fuck me." Spencer whispered.

Finally.

"Now that's something I can work with."

The smaller girl brushed her thumb against Spencer's clit as she continued to thrust her fingers in and out.

And Spencer, well, she couldn't really say much. It just came out in strangled cries. Of pleasure of course.

I mean, who doesn't want to be fucked by a totally hot and sexy brunette as they were working? That's like a heroin addict turning down his next hit. Or a fat kid giving up cake. Or a rich person…

You get the idea.

"Holy shit!" Spencer half-yelled. Because, remember, she's working.

The brunette let Spencer ride out her orgasm, slowing her movements until Spencer was able to form a sentence.

Not like she would. She just reached up and snaked her fingers around the back of the woman's neck, bringing her into a kiss that would surely bruise their lips.

But they didn't care.

--------------------------------------

**Some time later…**

The lights finally on, and their clothes, the brunette and the blonde finally looked at each other, both liking what they saw.

Spencer was the first to break their mutual gaze. "I'm gonna write you a referral for Dr. West. He's an allergist and he's great, so…"

"So…?"

"I don't…remember," Spencer admitted bashfully.

"Awww," the brunette murmured, moving up to the good doctor. "You're too cute and so fucking hot…you know that?"

Spencer groaned deep back in her throat before pressing their lips together again, driving them both back towards the closed examination room door. They kissed hungrily for a few minutes, the sounds they forced out of each other progressively making them hotter.

Finally, Miss Davies pulled away, her chest heaving. She pulled out a card, out of her back pocket. "Call me," she told Spencer, kissing her once more before smiling softly and opening the door.

"So, I'll make sure to call Dr. West, Doctor…" the woman said loudly, easing out of the door.

"Carlin," Spencer replied, easily catching on. "Just give him a ring and set up and appointment Miss Davies."

"I'll be sure to do that," she said, winking at Spencer before turning around abruptly, walking away, her hips swaying drastically with each step.

As she walked down the hallway, all of the office doors swung open as she passed; the different doctors stepping out to get a better look. Then, once she had turned the corner, they all turned in Spencer's direction.

Looking like the cat that ate the canary, she merely shrugged, tucking the card into her lab coats pocket.

Oh yeah. She'd definitely be giving Miss Davies a call.


	2. Recital Romance

Ashley hurriedly rushed the little boy into the music hall, the click-clack of his tap shoes matching the click-clack of her heels.

It was Justin's first recital and his dad, her prick of an older brother, was missing out on it.

"No son of mine is gonna wear tights and prance around like a fairy," she remembered Aiden saying when the idea was first suggested.

"Okay, okay. Unless they're drunk of course," she replied, subtly reminding him of an occasion where he had worn tights and pranced around like a fairy. An overgrown fairy, but a fairy nonetheless.

Justin registered in dance class the next day.

She was responsible for getting him to and from classes however, and with her hectic schedule she never really had time to linger, either before or after his sessions. The work of a music director is never done. Especially if you were the music director of the prestigious California School of the Arts.

Anyway, all of this was said to explain why it was that Ashley had never seen her before that day: the day she collided into her.

"Umpf," the blonde murmured stumbling back.

"Oof," Ashley replied, not nearly as athletic or balanced. The impact knocking her flat on her ass.

She glanced up through her bangs to glare at the immovable object that had, defying physics, stopped the unstoppable force.

She couldn't though. Her heart just wasn't in it, or so she thought as all the air was gradually forced out of her lungs.

She was in the presence of an angel.

A golden-haired, blue-eyed angel.

With remarkable agility.

"Aunt Ash, are you okay?" she vaguely heard Justin saying, the five-year-old tugging earnestly on her arm, trying to pull her off of the ground.

She blinked once, and then twice, it was the third one that made her realize she was staring.

Grounding her eyes, she pushed herself off of the floor, brushing off as much dust as she could manage.

"I'm okay, Just," she told him, not daring to look at the other woman.

"Okay, cool," he said, turning to look at the little girl, who was standing shyly behind the woman she'd nearly knocked over. "Hi Mia."

"Hi," the girl answered back shyly.

"Hi Mia's mommy," Justin told the blonde lady, who nearly chuckled in response, effectively drawing Ashley's eyes back to her. "Hi Justin and Justin's…aunt?" the blonde tentatively asked, smiling warmly at the brunette.

Ashley nodded, feeling shy and then wondering why. This was just a woman…an attractive woman, but she'd been around plenty of those in her lifetime. She didn't look too bad herself so as far as beautiful women were concerned…she gets-a plenty.

"Ashley Davies," she said, sticking out her hand for a formal handshake, some of her confidence re-remerging. "Music Director, California School of the Arts."

"Spencer Carlin," the blonde replied amusedly, taking her hand to shake. "Mom. Family Home of Domestication. I, um, sorry about before."

"Before?" Ashley was confused.

"Knocking you down," Spencer said slowly, lightly trying to jog her memory.

"Oh right," Ashley said, feeling slightly embarrassed. "Right. Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure? You're not injured or anything, are you?" the blonde teased, tilting her head to one side.

"No, not that I'm aware of," Ashley smiled, her nose wrinkling in the process.

"Okay then," Justin said slowly, tugging on his aunt's hand again. "Come on. You need to get a good seat so you can see my grand plies."

"O-kay," she said, not really having a choice as he pulled her onward. She glanced back at the blonde a few times as he led her down the hall. She didn't know why she wasn't worried that she hadn't gotten her number, or that she hadn't given her hers.

No. She had the sneaking suspicion that she'd be seeing Miss Carlin again…and soon.

----------

She was pouring over the program, looking for Carlin anywhere when she felt more than saw a presence slipping into the seat next to her.

"She has her father's last name," a soft voice whispered into her ear, and a sheepish smile spread slowly across her face.

"That explains it," Ashley whispered, turning to look at the woman sitting next to her.

"Mind if I sit here?" Spencer asked, looking genuinely concerned.

"Nope. I mind if you don't actually," Ashley drawled rather seductively, smiling at the light blush that graced the other woman's cheeks.

"So, how long have you been taking Justin to class?" Spencer asked, slipping off her light jacket.

"Since he started," Ashley said, then continued upon the look of shock that crossed Spencer's features. "His dad's really not into these things so it's up to me to encourage his… shall we say, artistic side."

"Oh no, I didn't mean- I wasn't implying _that_. It's just that I've never seen you before," Spencer explained.

"Oh, well, I'm usually pretty busy. It's kind of an in and out sort of deal?"

"In and out?" Spencer repeated playfully, popping an eyebrow.

Ashley almost choked on her tongue. "Uh huh…"

"Oh, look," Spencer said, unsuccessfully concealing her smile. "They're starting."

----------

Justin and Mia finished their little dance with the rest of their class and the crowd erupted in applause. No, not because they were freaking awesome, but well, because their family was so proud of what they learned.

Ashley and Spencer both walked toward the door, bumping into each other along the way. "Watch it blondie," Ashley sneered. In a joking way of course. She bumped her hip against Spencer's, causing the blonde to nearly topple over.

"You watch it, Davies," Spencer chuckled, placing her hands on Ashley's shoulders and shoving her playfully toward a crowd of by-standers.

"Okay, okay! You win!" Ashley squealed.

Spencer smirked, letting go of the brunette's shoulders. "That's what I thought."

"Whatever. You'll get it blondie," Ashley joked, rubbing her shoulders in an 'ow-you-really-hurt-me' manner.

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Ashley," Spencer warned. Her eyebrow arched as she glanced over at the smaller woman.

"Who said I couldn't keep it?" Ashley asked vaguely.

On cue.

Enter the children.

"Aunt Ash!" Justin screamed, bounding over to Ashley with wide arms. "Didja see me, Aunt Ash? Didja, didja, didja?"

Ashley bent over and picked up the little tyke. "Yes, I did. And you were amazing!" she exclaimed, kissing his cheek. "As were you, Mia," she said sincerely to the girl standing precariously behind Spencer's legs.

Mia smiled softly at Ashley. "Yeah, Mimi. You was great!" Justin yelled. Ashley set him back down and watched as he took Mia into a hug.

"Okay, Just. Gotta get you back to Daddy's," Ashley said, stretching her arm out to take the little boy's hand into her own.

"Bye, bye Mia!" Justin waved with his free hand to the little girl that found her way back behind the tall blonde's legs. "Bye Mia's Mommy!"

"Goodbye, Justin," Spencer replied. She bent down and picked up her little girl. "And goodbye Ashley." At this, she shot Ashley a wink.

Ashley felt her knees…do something. "Yeah, bye," she murmured, turning around and leaving the building.

----------

"Aunt Ash?" Justin asked, stepping into his Aunt's room.

Ashley looked up from the papers on her desk to look up at the small boy. "Yes, Just?"

"Can you maybe invite Mia to come over and play?" Justin asked, his feet playing nervously with each other.

"Aww, does Justin have a little crush?" Ashley joked, standing up to walk over to him, her fingers meeting with his sides as she tickled him.

"Ahaha! No!" Justin squealed under his Aunt's fingers.

Ashley giggled along with her nephew until her hands grew tired. "Alright. I'll call her now. When do you want to play with her?"

Justin's eyebrows furrowed together in concentration. "Hows about…tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow it is then," Ashley replied. She walked over to her desk and fished through her purse for her phone. An odd piece of paper caught her eye. "What the hell?"

Justin gasped. "Aunt Ash said a bad word!" he exclaimed, lifting his left hand to cover his mouth and his right to point at Ashley.

"Yeah, Aunt Ash said a bad word," Ashley repeated in a daze as she read over the words scrawled out onto the paper. "Why that dirty little girl."

"Who dirty?" Justin asked, bouncing over to his Aunt. He grabbed her arm and pulled it down so he could see the paper. "What's that?"

Ashley shook her head. "So you wanna play with your girlfriend tomorrow?"

Justin blushed and nodded his head. "She's not my girlfriend, Aunt Ash," he pointed out.

"Sure she's not," Ashley muttered, dialing the number from the paper.

A groggy voice picked up, "'Ello?"

"Hi, Spencer," Ashley answered in triumph. Triumph over what? Who knows. "This is Ashley."

"Who?"

"From the recital?"

"Who?"

"The in and out girl," Ashley blushed at her words.

Spencer chuckled. "Oh, that Ashley. Sorry, I've met a lot of them."

Spencer: one, Ashley: zero.

"Look, Spencer," Ashley said, already completely embarrassed at how the conversation was going. "Justin asked me if Mia could come over tomorrow for a little play date."

"Sounds harmless enough," Spencer replied. "But what am I supposed to do? I was gonna take Mia to the park tomorrow."

"Justin and I will meet you there. Sound okay?" Ashley asked, sounding more excited and eager than she hoped.

"Yup. So…around noon?" Spencer questioned back.

Ashley smiled. "Yup. Sounds like a plan."

"Okay. Noon tomorrow at the park. Meet at the swings," Spencer responded, ending the call before Ashley could add a witty remark.

"Well, Aunt Ash?" Justin asked. He tugged at Ashley's shirt.

Ashley tore her phone away from her ear, astonished at what had just happened. Usually she was the one ending the calls or making the plans. But this blonde woman had completely turned the tables on her.

"Aunt Ash!" Justin yelled, finally getting his Aunt's attention.

"Oh yeah," Ashley whispered, coming out of her daze. "We're gonna go to the park tomorrow."


	3. The Luv Boat

**Author's Note:** So, I don't think I've mentioned over here, but this fic is actually written by my Beta, decemberized, and I so if you guys can please show her some love as well. Feedback is love. And here's an update.

-----------

This _so_ wasn't her scene.

The lights, the music, the pristine-ness of it all was just direly overwhelming.

She'd much rather be in a bar, dimly lit, tossing back a few Coronas with her co-workers.

Or in some coffee bar, listening to far too eccentric poetry and sipping on some overpriced caramel/caffeine concoction.

Either way, both places were bound to be more appealing than this…this…Oh God, she was gonna be sick.

It's nothing new now, of course, she'd spent the last couple of hours draped over her cabin's toilet, retching like there was no tomorrow.

That's what happens when you're seasick.

And that's what Spencer Carlin gets for deciding (against her better judgment) to accompany her parents on this cruise.

Their anniversary cruise.

Why her parents insisted on her joining them on what was essentially a second honeymoon baffled her.

Then again, a lot of things baffled Spencer.

Like why at 27 years of age, she'd yet to find someone to settle down with, or even pretend to settle down with.

Maybe she was looking for love in the wrong places. Maybe the problem was that she was looking.

Whatever the case, she was single, and getting older, and, glancing around at the sea of middle-aged smiling faces, she was starting to realize that her parents may have had an ulterior motive when they invited her.

She felt someone tapping her gently on the left shoulder, and turned from her position leaning over the boat rails, to look only to find the area deserted.

The throaty chuckle to the other side of her, reminded her that she wasn't alone however.

"Hi," the rather attractive woman said, smiling warmly at Spencer. She wasn't wearing anything spectacular, just some white shorts and a polo shirt, flip-flops adorning her feet. Yet, still, there was no denying her beauty. Inside and out.

"Uh, hi?" Spencer said, not entirely sure if she should be talking or not.

"Is that a question?" the woman asked with a smirk.

"No," Spencer replied quickly, feeling a little more than embarrassed. "I was just- hi," she finished lamely, contemplating jumping over the railing.

"Hi again," the brunette said, turning around to press her back against the railing. "There a reason you out her all by your lonesome?" she asked, keeping her tone friendly at best.

Spencer mimicked the other woman's actions, looking up at the darkening sky. "I needed some fresh air."

"Seasick?"

"Like no one's business," the blonde murmured, eliciting a hearty chuckle from the brunette.

"Well, that's no good," the brunette commented casually, though there was something about her tone that suggested anything but casualty. "There's a remedy for that you know."

"There is?"

The other woman nodded. "There are some pills; herbal pills that help relieve motion sickness. I have some…in my cabin."

Now, Spencer wasn't completely daft and she knew that the stranger, correction: good-looking stranger, had other intentions for getting her back to her cabin.

But, luckily, Spencer didn't care.

"We could go get you some," the dark-haired woman said, invading Spencer's personal space, really for the first time.

Spencer didn't mind too much. "I think I'd like that."

**-----------**

It was kinda dark in the hallway the woman led her down, and quiet, unlike any other area of the ship.

The brunette fumbled with the keys a little bit, but that was the only outward appearance of nerves she displayed. Everything else screamed confidence.

She pushed open the door, reveling to Spencer a spacious suite, or, you know, apartment on water.

That works too.

"Oh my God," Spencer breathed out, taking a tentative step forward. "Is this your cabin?"

"Uh…since I have the keys, and I sleep here and everything, I think that, yes, this is my cabin," the brunette teased.

"That's so funny," Spencer said, rolling her eyes, suddenly stricken. "What did you say your name was?"

"I didn't,"

"I know. That was me trying to ask and not sound like an idiot," Spencer replied, looking shy. "Can you please tell me your name?"

"Why? Are you not supposed to be talking to strangers little girl?" the brunette kept up, inching closer to her.

"Okay, seriously," Spencer said, starting to maybe freak out. "What's your name?"

"Ashley," the brunette said, shrugging her shoulders like it was no big deal. Inside, she was hoping against hope that the other woman would not recognize the name.

"You got a last name Ashley?" the blonde asked, crossing her arms.

"Davies. Ashley Davies," she said, now seriously fretting.

Spencer didn't react however, other than to tell her her name was Spencer…Carlin.

"Carrrrllllin," Ashley drawled, letting the name roll of her tongue.

"Precisely. Now, where's that medicine? I suggest you find it quickly unless you want me to hurl on you."

Ashley paled. "Don't do that."

Spencer laughed, holding up her hands. "No promises."

Ashley quickly retrieved the pills and handed them, along with a glass of water, to the blonde, as they settled together comfortably on a sofa.

"So…" Ashley started. "You, uh, come on the cruise alone?"

Spencer didn't want to lie to the woman, but she didn't want to tell her the truth either, because even she recognized that going on a cruise at her age with your parents was pretty pathetic.

Okay, more than pathetic.

It was devastating.

"No," she answered truthfully, taking another sip of her water.

Ashley casually draped her right arm across the back of the sofa, lolling her neck to one side as if trying to get the kinks out. "Here with your boyfriend?" she asked and Spencer merely shook her head.

There was something about the way Ashley said boyfriend that slightly unnerved her. It sounded almost as if the brunette was amused she was asking that particular question. Wonder why-

"Girlfriend?"

That would be why.

"Uh-" Spencer's mind literally went blank…except for 'girlfriend'?

"That's a no, huh?" Ashley asked with a smirk, scooting closer to Spencer on the couch, even more so.

That was odd; Spencer didn't remember her being that close before.

"It's okay," she heard Ashley whisper before pressing her lips to hers.

She sighed on contact, her eyes still open because the kiss was so unexpected. It stayed chaste for about maybe all of five seconds, then Ashley brought a hand up, wrapping her fingers around the back of Spencer's neck, deepening the kiss, sliding her tongue into Spencer's mouth when the blonde involuntarily moaned at the new contact.

Sneaky girl.

Spencer couldn't really think about much as the languid kisses continued, the wet sounds starting to work on her both mentally and physiologically, neither of which were much under her control right now.

She whimpered when Ashley pulled her lips away to leave a wet trail along her jaw line and down her neck, feeling the brunette smile against her skin.

The blonde finally realized she had hands and could use them so she threaded her fingers through Ashley's hair, raking her nails lightly against her scalp as the other woman's exploration continued lower, now focusing on Spencer's collarbone, exposed because of the tank top she'd chosen to wear.

"I think," Ashley faltered a bit, Spencer's fingers unwittingly finding a sensitive spot at the base of her neck. "I think this needs to come off," she said, tugging at the base of the other woman's tank.

Spencer agreed, whipping it off without another word, her eyes still closed. As long as she didn't open them, this was all okay.

The fact that she was getting more turned on by a woman than any man was okay.

Okay, maybe not so much, but she'd save the freak-out for later.

"This too," Ashley said, reaching a hand around to unclasp her bra. Spencer had no objections for that anyway.

Okay, maybe one.

Ashley was still fully clothed.

Maybe she could open her eyes for a little bit.

She sat pressed against the sofa as Ashley straddled her. For the moment their flurry of activity ceased, Ashley had just finished tossing the bra aside as Spencer's hands slowly traveled down from Ashley's hair settling on her collar, tugging her closer to Spencer.

Ashley chuckled deep in her throat as Spencer attacked her neck hungrily, nipping at the heated skin before trailing off into more gentle yet equally sensual caresses.

Spencer's fingers started working on the buttons on the brunette's button up shirt, trying to work the two sides apart…trying being the opportune word.

Frustration set in rather quickly for the hot and heavy blonde and she simply threw caution to the wind and forcefully pulled the shirt apart, the buttons ricocheting across the room.

She gaped at her handiwork, eyes wide as she looked up at Ashley. "I am so sor-"

But the rest was kind of mumbled into Ashley's mouth for obvious reasons.

A short time later Spencer found herself naked and in bed with another naked person.

A naked woman to be exact.

Actually she was getting fucked by a naked woman. Ashley.

She was being fucked by Ashley.

And that fact was the reason it took so long for that thought to be formulated.

The side effects of having your brains fucked out.

What Spencer was experiencing right now was only comparable to a religious experience, Ashley's fingers buried deep inside of her, touching places that had never been touched before. She'd explored Spencer's body thoroughly on the outside, marking every patch of skin with a heated touch or kiss before taking the time to explore her inside.

And taking the time was right.

Spencer couldn't help crying out with every thrust, the tide within her rising for another time.

Unbelievably.

But just like before Ashley slowed her pace, bringing her to the brink of ecstasy and letting her teeter on the edge before relenting, never quite giving her the release she desperately needed and it was killing her.

"Ugh," she groaned, unabashedly pressing herself against Ashley's fingers. The action blatantly conveying what it is she wanted…desired. "Ashleyyyy."

But Ashley was finding this somewhat amusing, plus there was something she still wanted to do. "What?" she teased, her voice playful, yet husky. She leaned down against Spencer, bringing their bodies together. "What's wrong baby?" she whispered before taking the other woman's earlobe into her mouth.

"Oh my God," Spencer whispered, exasperated really, but even she couldn't deny how good that felt.

Ashley's throaty chuckle resounded again, the vibrations only serving to turn Spencer on more. "All you have to do is tell me…just say it Spencer and I swear I will," she whispered, again into her ear.

Spencer's throat went dry then worked so that she could form the words, which at first came out as a strangled whisper.

"What's that?" Ashley asked her, bringing her face down to Spencer's listening intently.

"Make me come, Ashley,"

Ashley smiled down at her, her gaze almost predatory. "Gladly."

Without another word Ashley slid down Spencer's body, planting firm kisses every half inch or so. Spencer so knew where this was headed, and she readied herself for it, or so she thought.

Truth be told, when Ashley's tongue first pressed against her slick flesh she cried out in pleasure.

'Holy fuck!' she thought, staring down at Ashley. She wasn't going to survive this.

Ashley winked at her before wrapping her lips around her, sucking gently.

Nope.

Dead.

**-----------**

She smelled…tea.

Yes, that was it, tea.

Spencer cracked one eye open, letting the sunlight that filled the spacious cabin re-acclimate her to her surroundings.

Aaaaaaaaannnnnddd…now.

"Fuck me sideways," she gasped, aloud, springing up in bed.

Her breathing was frantic as she pulled the sheets around her clutching them to her chest, searching frantically around the room for the brunette.

Ashley.

That woman turned her completely inside out and made her feel things she thought weren't real before because she'd only read about them.

But they were real.

Oh God, were they ever real.

Just thinking about last night made her…cross her legs uncomfortably.

She finally noticed the tray laid out on a table, propped up at her bedside.

Spencer crawled over and looked over the remarkable spread. It looked like stuffed French toast with fresh raspberries and whipped cream, some hash browns, eggs, sunny side up, and a chilled glass of orange juice.

And the tea.

We mustn't forget the tea.

The thing that attracted most of her attention though was the note card lying beside a neatly and obviously freshly pruned flower.

She picked up the card and the flower, smiling as she read the words printed on it.

_Morning Beautiful,_

_I sincerely apologize for not being there when you wake. I honestly didn't want to leave my bed this morning but alas, external forces beckoned to me, and their call had to be heeded._

_I trust that you find everything I had prepared for you to your liking. I kinda just went with my favorites because I'm sure you like what I like, that is, if last night or this morning is any indication. Ah, I can almost feel you blushing sweetheart._

Spencer rolled her eyes here, even as her cheeks were a deeply tinted red.

_Anyway, I hope to see you at brunch today. I'll just be looking for the most beautiful woman in the world._

_Yours truly,_

_Ashley_

_P.S. You look amazing when you're coming…_

If Spencer wasn't red before, she sure as hell was now. And she was suddenly hungry for much more than what was on her tray.

She picked up a whipped cream covered raspberry and popped it into her mouth.

Maybe she'd go to brunch a little early.

**-----------**

"Spencer!" she heard her mother call out from clear across the room, and she wanted to run. But that wouldn't be too pretty with what she chose to wear, not to mention she'd look pretty ridiculous.

"Aren't you a little overdressed for a brunch, dearest?" Paula asked her, her eyes looking over Spencer's outfit.

It wasn't that much, just a blue sundress that did wonders for her eyes, and she'd worn her hair down. The sandaled shoes she had on may have been a bit much though.

"It's just a sundress Mother," she said, rolling her eyes, even as she surveyed the crowd for Ashley. She was looking for that shock of brown tresses that she'd already memorized.

Photographic memories are the shit.

"Well, okay then. But, where were you last night? You just disappeared, without even checking in with us,"

Spencer struggled for words, her photographic memory working against her this time, as images of where she was last night flashed vividly through her mind's eye. "I…I um, I was-"

"It doesn't matter. Here," Paula said, grabbing a glass of wine off of a passing tray, (because you drink all the time on a cruise) and handing it to her daughter. "There's someone I want you to meet."

"Oh there you are Spencer," her father said, as the girl approached, still looking around for Ashley. "We were just talking about you. This," he said, clapping a hand upon the back of a fine man, probably her age. "Is Aiden Dennison, and he's first mate," he concluded, and the man introduced himself. Spencer smiled politely and everything as her father prepared for yet another introduction. "And this," he said, gesturing to someone in a well dressed suit, more elaborate than the other guy's. "…is the captain of this here vessel," he said, tapping the person gently on the shoulder.

Spencer's breath left her lungs as the Captain turned around and smiled adorably at her.

"Ashley?" she whispered tremulously, her glass still held rather precariously in her hand.

"Hey there beautiful," the confident brunette smirked, her captain's hat slanted slightly as it was perched atop her head.

"You two know each other?" Paula asked, confused.

Spencer didn't answer her though.

She had officially hit the deck.


	4. But I Don't Know Her

"And that's the projected sales for the Spring Quarter," Ashley concluded, ending the slideshow presentation.

The board room erupted in applause and she and Glen beamed at each other, completely soaking it up.

"Excellent work as always Ashley and Glen," Mr. Barker told them once the members had dispersed and they were collecting their materials. "Do tell me you're both still attending our Fourth of July party? My wife is looking forward to meeting my two best employees."

"Wouldn't miss it Mr. Barker," Glen effused, giving him his award-winning grin. "And Ashley here is just beside herself in anticipation."

"Can't wait," Ashley said, giving the man a tight smile.

"Good, good," he said, turning away. "Make sure you bring the significant others. The misses has some couples' thing planned."

Ashley paused, mid-shuffle, and held the papers loosely in her grip.

"What's wrong Ashley?" Glen asked, barely paying attention, still focused on stuffing things into his briefcase.

"Did he say significant others?" she muttered out.

"Yeah," Glen answered, finally turning around. "Whoa. What happened? You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Uh…nothing," she said, breaking out of the trance with a slight shake of her head. "So, who are you gonna bring?"

"Madison," he chuckled, looking at her oddly. "My girlfriend, duh. What about you? You bringing your main squeeze?"

"Who?"

"Adrian?" Glen guessed.

Ashley snorted. "Aiden?"

Glen nodded. "That is your beau, right?" he asked, insanely curious. He'd heard some things but Ashley wasn't very forthcoming, even though they were partnered on practically every project now.

"No, uh, he's my brother-in-law actually," she said, flipping her hair back and clearing her throat.

Nervous.

"I see," Glen said, keeping his eyes on hers though she refused to meet his. "So…you got a girlfriend?"

Ashley almost keeled over in shock. "Wh-what?" she squeaked out.

"Don't freak out," he laughed again, probably more to cover up his own anxiousness than anything. "I mean, I don't care if you do. Just asking."

"No. No, I don't have a girlfriend," she finally answered after some pause.

"But you are gay though?"

"Yes," she answered quickly, finally looking him in the eye, raising one brow. "You got a problem with that?"

"No problem," he rushed to say, raising his hands defensively. "No, I just…have a proposition for you…" he hedged, getting a blank stare in return. "Not that kind of proposition, jeez. What kind of guy do you take me for?"

"I'm listening,"

"I've got a sister and she just moved here from the Bay area and I was wondering since you-"

"No,"

"What no? I haven't even asked yet,"

She smirked at him, but it was more playful than serious. "Fine continue."

"Now, as I was saying, since you don't have a girlfriend and need a date for Barker's party, and since she is newly single and very very gay, maybe you could like…take her?"

"Nope,"

"Why?"

"I don't _do_ blind dates. They're horrid and never work out,"

"So, obviously you _do_ do them since you know all of that,"

"Once or twice, but never again,"

"Come on Ashley, she doesn't know anyone here, and she's not very…outgoing, so to speak."

She rolled her eyes at his exaggerated pout. "Let's say I do take this…sister out. What do I get in return?"

"My undying affection?"

She made and "aww" face. "Nah."

"Dinner at any restaurant in the city,"

"Guess again,"

"Okay. Tickets to the Lakers game, courtside,"

"And we have a winner,"

"She'd better enjoy you,"

"Hey, I am nothing if not enjoyable," Ashley quipped, grabbing her own briefcase and starting out of the room. "She'd just better not be a troll."

"Hey," Glen squealed. "I am appalled you'd even suggest such a thing. She's _my_ sister."

Ashley sighed. "So, she _does_ look like a troll."

"I'm telling her you said that," Glen said, rushing to the elevator and closing the doors before she could board.

---

"Ew, Glen, no. I'm not a charity case," Spencer said, cradling the phone to her ear while she took her frozen dinner out of the fridge.

"Nobody said you were. I was just thinking that it'd be nice to get you out of the house and eat some real food for a change as opposed to that flash frozen junk I know you're sticking in your microwave right now,"

"But I don't even know this person,"

"Hence the beauty of a blind date,"

"You know, just because we're both lesbians, it doesn't mean that we're gonna hit it off,"

"No. You're gonna hit it off because you're Spashley," Glen muttered.

"What?" Spencer didn't even get that.

"Never mind. I just need a yes or no and before you say no remember that you turning down a date with a woman you haven't even met is not gonna be a great boost to her self-confidence,"

Spencer paused, the therapist in her taking over. "Fine."

"Sweet. Me and Madison will scoop you up."

----

It was the night before the boss's party and Ashley decided she needed a drink.

Aside from being his usual obnoxious self, Glen had not divulged any details. She didn't even know the girl's name. Plus there was that anxiety of a pending anniversary party for Kyla and Aiden; one in which she would undoubtedly be bombarded with questions about why she was still single and why she couldn't find a nice man (because no matter how many times they told Grandma that she was gay, the woman conveniently always forgot).

So, that's why she went out for a late night coffee, not really a heavy drinker. She was nursing the warm liquid when the bells to the small coffee shop jingled, signaling a new customer.

She tuned it all out of course, closing her eyes, focused instead on calming her nerves, but it became increasingly difficult when the rustling of clothes and fiddling with zippers got louder and louder. Finally, she just decided to open her eyes and almost fell out of her chair when she did.

Spencer's eyes widened as she reached for the falling woman, steadying her before she fell. "I'm sorry. Sorry. Did I startle you?"

Ashley shook her head.

Well sorry anyway," she pulled out a fifty dollar bill. "Do you have change?"

The brunette nodded.

"Can I have it?" Spencer giggled, still holding onto the other woman's arm.

"Right," she croaked out, finally righting herself. She dug around in her purse, producing the five bucks necessary for Spencer's purchase. Of course she refused the money when Spencer tried to hand it to her.

"It's on me,"

"Oh no. Really, I couldn't," the blonde insisted.

"Well then, sit and drink with me," the brunette said.

Uh.

Confident much.

"Are you serious?" Spencer asked, eyebrows skyward.

"As…something that's really serious."

Spencer still looked reluctant so the brunette smiled at her, her best one. "It's just coffee. We can just…talk."

"Okay," Spencer nodded. "Talking is good."

----

Fucking is better.

Fucking someone else?

Heaven.

Ashley panted heavily as Spencer crawled back up her naked body, planting kisses each time she crept up an inch or so.

She finally settled against her, wrapping her arms around the exhausted woman's waist. Ashley moaned.

"That was good."

"Only good?" Spencer questioned, nuzzling her cheek.

"Great?" Ashley offered, a lazy smile gracing her features.

"Much better," Spencer agreed, capturing her lips again.

"Mmm," Ashley mumbled, smiling into the kiss. "Best re-payment for a cup of coffee ever."

"Mmm hmm," Spencer replied, feeling the tide turn once again. "Imagine what I'd do for a Klondike bar."

Ashley rolled them over swiftly so that she was on top. "I'll buy a box tomorrow."

----

"Ashley, dearest, so glad you could make it," Mr. Barker said, or yelled drunkenly, depending on whom you asked. "We've been waiting for you."

"We?" the brunette inquired, raising an eyebrow.

"Why yes," he said, draping an arm around her shoulder and ushering her into a crowded room. "Glen and Madison are already here and he brought his sister."

"Hi Ashley." An all too familiar voice sounded behind them.

She whirled around, out of Barker's embrace, only to find herself face to face with the blonde from the night before…Spencer.

"Hi," she breathed out, her surprise evident. Though Spencer didn't seem the least bit surprised. In fact, her lips quirked in a knowing smirk. "What are you doing here?" Ashley continued, taking a few steps to close the distance between them.

"Well, I uh-"

"Sweet!" Glen exclaimed, popping up from nowhere. "You guys have already met. Davies, this is my youngest sibling, Spencer, same last name. And Spence, I'd like you to meet my colleague and fellow sports fanatic Ashley Davies."

"Um, hi," Spencer said, holding out her hand amusedly.

"Hi," Ashley chuckled, wrapping her fingers around her hand.

It was a perfect fit.

"Alright, now that we're done with the introductions you guys should just go ahead and get it on. Talk, see what you have in common," Glen said, sneakily yet unnecessarily pushing the women closer together.

They both watched his overzealous self walk away, shaking their heads at his cheesy thumbs up as he rounded a corner.

"Funny how life is huh?" Ashley finally said, after some time.

"How so?"

"We totally hooked up the night before our blind date. Some would call it fate," the brunette drawled, grabbing a couple of glasses of wine from a tray as it (or rather a member of the wait staff carrying it) went by.

"That's not fate," Spencer disagreed, shaking her head as another tray went by. She grabbed the foil covered ice-cream treat from it, smiling adorably at Ashley. "_This_ is fate."


	5. Me Ashley You Spencer

"Glen!" Spencer called out into the house. She waited about a minute before she walked into the living room in search of her annoying older brother.

No such luck.

_Maybe the kitchen._

She turned on her heel and entered the kitchen, almost ramming into her other brother. "Oh, sorry Clay," she mumbled, deep in thought.

"Hey Spence?" Clay asked, taking a bite from his sandwich.

Spencer twirled around with her eyebrows raised, "Hmm?" She tilted her head to the side.

"What do you need him for?" Clay questioned, sticking the sandwich back in his mouth and taking a generous bite from it.

"I just need him for something really important," Spencer answered, her mind not so much into the question at hand.

"Well, can I help you?"

Spencer shook her head.

"Why?"

"It involves wilderness."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Glen is where?"

Clay pointed up to the second floor and Spencer took off quickly to find their older brother. Clay rolled his eyes at his sister. "Man, Glen is sure gonna regret whatever she has planned," he whispered as soon as Spencer was out of ear-shot.

-----------

"Oh come on, Glen," Spencer pleaded, grabbing his arm and pulling on it.

"Nope. Nuh uh. Ain't gonna happen, Spence," Glen replied, yanking his arm from his sister's grasp and leaving his room to head downstairs.

Spencer right on his heel. "Please, Glen. If you don't do it, then I'm gonna have to do it alone. And you know mom and dad wouldn't want me to go alone."

"Then don't go," Glen pointed out, walking into the dining room. Plates already gracing the table as Clay sat there, book in hand, waiting for dinner to be served.

"But Glen," Spencer whined, circling him as he stood at the head of the table.

Clay looked up long enough to see Spencer's patented pout and Glen shaking his head. "What now?" he asked, slightly annoyed.

"Spencer wants to go on some back-packing trip to Africa." Glen rolled his eyes.

"And?"

"And Mallory just told me that she can't get the time off of work to go with me. I mean, it'll only be for this summer, it's not that long. And she's already taking half of the summer off already for some unknown reason that she won't tell me." Spencer paused to take a breath.

"That has to do with Glen because?" Clay asked, cutting off his sister's ramble.

"I wanted Glen to go because well…" Spencer furrowed her eyebrows together as she glanced over at Glen who wore a smirk on his face. "He's my big brother and you won't go because it's dealing with nature. And Mom won't go because well, she's Mom."

Breath.

"And Dad won't go because he can't leave all of his cases. Well, kids as he calls them, like you know. And Mallory won't go because she's stupid."

Breath.

"And Aiden is too girly to go with me. I think he mentioned something about breaking a nail or something like that. And Glen was the next best bet."

Breath.

"I mean, he loves nature. He even caught snakes at the old house back in Ohio…and kept them until Mom found out and made him set them free."

And end ramble, save her panting.

"Wow," Clay whispered.

"Yeah," Spencer breathed out.

Glen shook his head again. "I'm not going Spencer."

"Please Glen." Spencer gave him her patented puppy dog eyes accompanied with the signature pout.

"I already said this, Spencer, I'm not going."

-----------

"I can't believe you talked me into this," Glen mumbled as the stepped out of the truck that brought them to some remote city in the middle of nowhere. Well, nowhere consisted of lots of trees and bugs and animals and bugs and vines and…did we mention bugs?

"Oh come on, Glen!" Spencer called back to him as she reached the edge of the…forest thing. She took in a deep breath and turned around to face her brother. "Enjoy it. I mean, when will you ever get the chance to see all these animals again?"

"In a magazine," Glen answered shortly. He glanced down at his attire. Khaki slacks with boots with a buttoned up tan shirt. Too much for this hot weather that is. On his back rest the tent, his sleeping bag, six sets of clothing, and half the food and water supply all settled in a handy backpack.

Spencer was clad in almost the same thing, save the slacks for she wore short shorts that barely covered anything.

"I don't think this is a good idea, Spence," Glen warned as they stepped into the forested area.

"Don't be a party pooper, Glen," Spencer chirped as she walked quickly in between the trees, her balance taking over as she stepped on loose rocks and logs as they trekked deeper into the forest.

"Spencer?" Glen called out, finally looking up from the ground to see that his sister wasn't in front of him like she was a few minutes ago. "Spencer!" he yelled out, hoping that she heard him.

-----------

Insert annoying voice-over guy:

**Meanwhile, further in the forest…**

Spencer whistled as she walked down a slightly beaten path. She heard her brother call out for her and rolled her eyes. "Over here Glen!" she screamed back, taking a seat on a log that was jutting out of the ground.

Minutes passed until Glen finally caught up; out of breath, might we point out. "Oh thank God," he panted, sitting down next to his sister to catch his breath.

"You're out of shape," Spencer pointed out, standing up, looking down at her brother that was bent over, his elbows resting on the edges of his knees.

"Well if you didn't walk so fucking fast, I might be able to keep up," Glen hissed, his brow sweaty and his breathing irregular.

Spencer rolled her eyes. A twig snapped to their left. Well, Spencer's left, Glen's right. But you get the picture.

"Hello?" Spencer called out. Dumbly, we might add.

"Don't do that Spence!" Glen whispered harshly. He stood up and walked in front of his sister, removing his knife from his back pocket. "Stay behind me," he said.

**Almost heroically.**

It would have sounded like that if he hadn't slipped on a loose twig and fell flat on his face, his knife landing…a good ten feet away from either Carlin.

**Now they're screwed.**

"We're screwed," Spencer stated, helping her brother up off of the ground.

**I just said that.**

"We know," both Glen and Spencer replied harshly. Glen walked over and picked up his knife, holding it in front of his body menacingly.

A body emerged from behind a tree. Somewhat slumped over, the person hobbled over to the siblings, staying far enough away though as to not get hurt in the process.

Spencer smiled at the beauty. A raven-haired woman clad in only a leaf kind of bikini. Now if only the women in L.A. could dress like that. Then Spencer would be in heaven.

She walked from behind her brother and extended her hand to the woman. "I'm Spencer," she said cheerily.

"Don't do that, Spence," Glen warned, backing up slightly.

The woman shrunk away from Spencer's hand and Glen's harsh words. "It's alright," Spencer whispered, taking short, slow steps to reach the cowering woman.

**It seems as if our little Spencer and Glen are afraid of the ape-ish girl.**

"Will you shut up?" Spencer growled up into the air.

**Nope.**

"Why?"

**Because I don't want to.**

"Why the hell not?" This time it was Glen that spoke up. His anger showing through as he clenched his fists together.

**You should really be paying attention to the woman you found.**

Spencer whirled around to see the brunette woman climbing a vine and perching herself in the tree. "Would you please get down here?"

**I don't think she understands.**

"What the hell _does_ she understand?" Glen spoke up.

**Food. Monkey. Her name. Vine. Tree. Her name. Water. Rock. Did I mention her name?**

"What is her name?" Spencer asked, staring up at the brunette.

**Now why would I want to tell you that? It's more fun to watch you squirm.**

"Hardy har har," Spencer faked a laugh. "Just tell me, damn it. Or I'll cut it off."

_Squeak__**.**_** Ashley.**

Spencer smiled. "Ashley?" she called out. The brunette woman tilted her head and stared down at the couple below her.

"Spencer, I don't think this is a good idea," Glen pointed out as the woman wearing leaves climbed back down the tree and stood ten feet in front of the siblings.

"It's okay, Ashley. We don't want to hurt you." Spencer offered her hand again and was pleased when the woman walked forward and took it into her own, shaking it.

**Okay, that didn't happen.**

Ashley walked over to Spencer and gave her the once-over before grabbing her wrist and pulling her against her chest. "Mine," she muttered, dragging the blonde away from her brother.

"Wait! Ashley!" Glen called out, running after them.

**Tripping over a root.**

"Shut the hell up," Glen mumbled as he pushed himself up off the ground. He regained his footing and started to walk quickly after his sister and her captor.

**Well, until he ran into a tree.**

"Dude…this isn't a tree," he whispered, scrambling back on his hands and feet. Until he ran into a tree. Yes, an actual tree this time. "That's a…that's a…"

**Gorilla.**

Glen blinked furiously. "What the hell?" He clambered to his feet and poised his hands as if preparing to fight the animal.

**What are you gonna do, Glen, fight the Gorilla?**

"It's a monkey."

**Gorilla.**

"Monkey."

**Gorilla.**

"Will you _stop_ arguing with me about the monkey?" Glen asked angrily, backing away from the animal.

**Yeah. But I suggest you go get help to get your sister back.**

Glen furrowed his eyebrows together and turned on his heel, running back toward where he and his sister were dropped off by the car.

-----------

**And back with Spencer and Ashley...**

"Ashley?" Spencer asked as the brunette pulled her up into her little tree house.

"Mine," Ashley answered, tugging on Spencer's shirt, pulling her closer.

Spencer slapped at Ashley's hands, standing firmly two feet away. "No. Ashley. Spencer." She pointed to herself.

"Mine." Ashley reached out again only to be slapped again.

"Spencer."

"S-sp-Spen—Spencer," Ashley stuttered, she stuck her hands out and grabbed Spencer's shirt, pulling her forward. She wrapped her arms around Spencer's neck. "Mine," she whispered.

Spencer sighed. "Ashley, I can't be yours. You don't know me," Spencer reasoned.

"Mine," Ashley whispered again, a little more forceful. She tugged at Spencer's hips, their bodies crashing together, and their lips meeting in a soft kiss.

Spencer pressed her hands against Ashley's shoulders, pushing her away and breaking the kiss, a small pant evident in her breathing. "Ashley. Don't do that."

"Spencer Mine," Ashley replied, smiling brightly at the blonde, her nose crinkling in the process.

Oh shit.

**And now we leave our Dear Spencer and Ashley to go…well, wherever the hell Glen ended up.**

"Please, come help me," Glen said, exasperated, clutching onto one of the pedestrians walking down the sidewalk. He gripped his arm tightly, pleading with his eyes for the stranger to help him.

"What's wrong, boy?" the man asked, completely scared and confused at the mud-covered boy with torn slacks.

"My sister…she's…she's been kidnapped," Glen panted. He failed to mention she'd been kidnapped by a vine-swinging monkey girl. Somehow, he didn't think that'd go over too well.

-----------

**You get the gist of what happened, right? We don't really need to listen to his babble, do we? And now we can go visit Spencer and Ashley?**

**Good. Because well…oh great. Glen's there now…**

"Spencer?! Spencer can you hear me?!" Glen called out, staring up at the make-shift house.

**Because that isn't a stupid question…**

"Shut the hell up," Glen growled. "Spencer!" he squealed as soon as he saw his sister step out from inside the tree house.

Spencer gave him a weak smile, glancing around at the…army he brought with him. "What, Glen?"

"We've come to take you home," Glen flashed his teeth in a smile.

"Well, you've wasted your time." Spencer raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at her brother.

"What do you mean?" He watched as Ashley stepped out behind Spencer, wrapping her arms protectively around Spencer's waist.

"I'm not going."

"Oh yes, you are." Glen climbed up the little ladder thing and grabbed Spencer's arm.

"Mine!" Ashley snipped, baring her teeth at the blonde boy.

Glen's eyes bugged as he stared at his sister with the…

**Ape girl.**

"Look, Spencer, Mom and Dad will freak."

**Tell them she died.**

"I am not telling them that."

**Tell them that she got an infection and she's being quarantined and she can't leave the country.**

"No."

**Then tell them that she found Ashley and she is in love with her and she never wants to go home.**

"No. Look, could you stop with the suggestions?"

**Fine. I'll just watch from up here in this nice, cool, and bug-free sound booth.**

"Shut the hell up," Spencer and Glen both hissed.

"Spence, I'm not letting you stay here with this…ape girl." Glen grabbed her wrist again and started to pull her from Ashley's grasp.

Ashley walked in front of Spencer, in between the blonde girl and the blonde boy. "Mine," she growled.

"Yeah, whatever," Glen said, pressing his hand against Ashley's shoulder, trying to shove her aside. "Spencer, let's go."

"No."

And cue Ashley's rescue. She grabbed Glen by his shirt and shoved him against the wall. "Mine. You go." She raised her hand and made a fist out of it, to threaten the boy of course.

Glen swallowed hard and nodded his head slowly. Ashley let go of Glen's shirt and watched as he scrambled away from the brunette. "Spence," he pleaded.

Spencer shook her head and Ashley bared her teeth again.

**Glen got the message.**

"Yeah, yeah. I sure did." Glen rolled his eyes, lowering himself from the house. Free from harm and injury. This time that is.

Spencer wrapped her arms around Ashley's neck and pressed their lips together in a chaste kiss.

"Mine," Ashley whispered, caressing the blonde's hair.

Spencer nodded her head. "You're mine."


	6. Sleepless in the Big Apple

"Momma, I already told you that I'm fine," Spencer groaned into the phone.

Weekly phone call she must endure. It was part of her promise she made her mother when she moved here: the big apple.

Wait.

Add Dramatic Movie Music.

The. Big. Apple!

Okay, cheesy, yes. Back to Spencer then…

The blonde leaned up against the arm of her recently purchased couch. The apartment she was in just seemed so droll without it.

"No, mom." She rolled her eyes. "I told you, I'm not here to find anyone."

Spencer stood up from the couch and made her way into the kitchen. Maybe she could eat as her mother droned on about cute boys she was leaving behind in Ohio. Frankly, she didn't care about them.

"No, mom," she repeated from before. "I don't want to get into a relationship right now, alright?"

Long pause, enter the Jaws! Theme song. Nah, too corny.

"Look, I don't care if you have every Joe, Nick, or Steven at the house, I'm not coming home."

The blonde reached into the cabinet and removed one of her cereal bars that she _was_ going to save for the weekend shopping trip she had planned for Saturday…

"Ma. Ma, listen," she huffed, pressing the phone to her right shoulder with her head so that she could open the bar successfully without troubles. "Ma, I really don't have time for this."

Large bite. Chew, chew, chew. Swallow.

"Mother, I really need to get to bed." Spencer rolled her eyes again and groaned inwardly at the comments being mentioned to her. "Ma, I have work tomorrow morning at eight. I really need to sleep."

Motherly concern in the form of a lengthy lecture, check.

"Momma, I'll talk to you tomorrow when I get home, okay?" Pause. Add more worry and concern. "Yes, ma. I promise. Love you. Muah. Goodnight."

And now she was free. It was only nine at night and she had no intentions of going to bed.

What better time would it be than now to go visit a few stores? Preferably a pet store. She needed something to comfort her when the boogie people came out to scare her in the middle of the night.

------------

"Irene! I swear to God if you dropped another one of the glass cases, I will fire you!" Ashley screamed across the store when the sound of glass meeting concrete floor filled the air.

How nice of a boss is she? Really nice, huh? Thought so too.

"Sorry, Ash." The tiny teenage girl bent down and started to pick up the fallen plastic case from the floor.

Awww. Isn't she already cute?

Ashley came up behind her and let out a sigh of relief.

No permanent damage done to her employee AND! the merchandise wasn't harmed. Two birds dodged the same stone.

"Look, Irene, I know it's hard to work here," Ashley said softly, helping the smaller brunette pick up the case. "I mean, look how busy we are."

The teen giggled as she surveyed the small store. No one in sight.

"Yeah, I know Ash." They set the case onto the counter from which it fell before locking eyes.

"Hey, why don't you leave early? I'm sure you have homework or something to get done tonight," Ashley offered in a whisper as she tilted her head to the door.

Aww. How nice is that? Thinking of her little employee.

"Thanks, Ash," Irene giggled. She tore off her apron and sprinted to the back of the store to grab her backpack and purse.

Ashley chuckled and moved from the cases to the front of the store.

Maybe someone would come in.

Hey, she could dream.

The smaller girl came barreling out of the back room and nearly took out Ashley in the process. "Hey, Irene!"

Smaller girl stop. She turned on her heel and made eye contact with Ashley. "Yeah?"

"Make sure you have an umbrella or hat. It sounds like it's raining cats and dogs out there." A chuckle came from both girls at the corny joke.

Irene nodded her head once before grabbing an umbrella from the back room. "See you tomorrow, Ash," she called out over the booming rainfall that came from the opened front door.

"Bye, Irene." Ashley gave her a little half-wave, watching her cousin walk away from the store.

Now she's gotta close all by herself. "Fuck."

------------

Spencer clutched her rain-soaked jacket close to her body as she turned down yet another street.

All the stores were closed. Go figure.

Her eyes opened wide when she saw a small store with its lights on, and a small girl exiting the doors. She sprinted over to the door, just barely catching it after it had closed.

"Whew," she whispered loudly to herself, taking off her jacket and setting it onto the empty counter space, hoping the owner or manager wouldn't mind the puddle of water she was bound to leave.

"We're about to close!" a voice boomed out from behind a whole stack of dog food.

Spencer smiled when she saw a small brunette woman sporting a black apron and tight blue jeans emerge from the other side of the dog food pyramid.

Their eyes locked as they each share the same smirk. "How can I help you?" Ashley asked. She leaned down slightly and brushed her jeans to remove anything from them.

"I want a puppy," Spencer replied cheerily. Cheerily considering her hair was a complete, wet mess and her clothes were clinging to her body from the rain.

Now that's hot.

"Right over here," Ashley said, pointing her fingers into the direction behind the blonde to the front of the store.

The blonde followed Ashley over to the pen with the dogs. She shivered slightly when she saw some rat of a dog jump up at her. "Ew. Not that one."

Ashley chuckled. "Oh come on, Sparky isn't that bad. He just doesn't get enough attention, do you?" Her baby voice coming out as she picked up the small, furry dog, setting it in her lap.

"How about that one?" Spencer asked, pointing to the small golden retriever in the back corner, sleeping.

"Oh, you mean Duke?" Ashley giggled. She bent over and picked up the other puppy to hand it to the blonde. They each sat on a small stack of dog food, staring at the other. "Why are you getting a dog? I'm sure a beautiful girl like you could find a guy really easily."

Spencer shrugged her shoulders. Her finger wriggled in front of the small dog's nose, hoping to get it moving. "I just moved here and wanted some company."

"Oh," Ashley whispered.

Throw in awkward silence with nervous women, checkeroni.

"Ashley Davies." The brunette said, finally.

Spencer smiled. Their hands reaching out to shake the other's in a greeting. "Spencer Carlin."

"So there's no guy?" the brunette asked, after a moment of mustering up the courage.

The blonde shrugged her shoulders.

"What about a girl?"

I think Spencer could give those little green men a run for their money with how wide her eyes were at that moment. In fact, if there was food in her mouth, she'd surely choke on it. "What makes you think that I like girls?" she asked, rather offended.

Ashley smiled at the blonde, her nose crinkling in the process. "There's nothing wrong with being gay," she muttered softly. Hand brushed gently against the blonde's fingers, sending shockwaves through both bodies.

"I know there's nothing wrong with being gay," Spencer shot out. "But I'm not." She furrowed her eyebrows together.

"I am," Ashley replied quickly. She felt her cheeks burn red as she smiled softly at the taller woman.

Spencer's eyes raked over the brunette's features. Those soft, brown curls framing her face, that cute little button nose, those warm, inviting chocolate eyes, and her dimples. God those dimples.

And she started to internally freak out.

Thinking about what Ashley had already done to her since she'd been here.

The quaint little smile she received when she entered the store that was quickly followed by an once-over.

The subtle finger grazes as they talked.

The brunette was flirting with her?!

And enter awkward tension filled silence.

"So are you gonna get Duke? He seems to have taken to you," Ashley pointed out; the golden retriever had fallen asleep in the blonde's lap.

Spencer shook her head and watched as confusion settle over the brunette's facial features. "I'd rather get coffee with you."

Now it was Ashley's turn to be wide-eyed. Talk about coming out of left field with that one. She swallowed hard. "Yeah, okay. Just…let me close up real quick." She twisted and set the tiny dog in her lap back into the pen with the other three.

Spencer nodded her head, mirroring Ashley's actions. The little puppy stirred slightly before curling up against one of the others and falling back asleep.

------------

"So what brings you to The Big Apple?" Ashley asked, she clutched her coffee up in her hands in hopes to keep them warmer than the cold air surrounding them.

Spencer shrugged, taking a sip from her own cup. "I don't know. I just needed to get out of Ohio and wanted to try my hand at a really huge city."

"Your mom must have pushed you out." The brunette spat out before catching herself. She really needed to invest in a filter.

"What makes you say that?" Spencer asked, her footsteps halting to look at the smaller woman in front of her.

Ashley shrugged. "You haven't mentioned her yet. And you would have if either a, she was dead, or b, you loved her and she supported her decision to move out here."

Well now, Ashley sure seems cocky. Or wait, is that confidence? Who the heck cares, she was bold. There. Better.

"She just doesn't like that I moved so far away," Spencer said softly, resuming her walking.

They reached the blonde's apartment in no time flat.

Hey, they say that time goes by fast when you're having fun.

"I had a really nice time with you, Spencer," Ashley admitted. Her fingers played with the hem of her shirt as she nervously waited for the blonde to say something.

"Me too, Ashley," Spencer said quietly.

Ashley's bright chocolate eyes searched Spencer's piercing blue ones for the answers to the questions she was silently asking.

When she didn't see any protest, she whispered, "Just tell me not to, okay?" The brunette inched her face forward, finding not words to stop her, but the blonde's lips against her own in a soft kiss.

But as soon as it started, Ashley pulled back to stop it. She watched as Spencer's eyes stayed close for at least ten seconds afterward, savoring the kiss.

"I'll be seeing you, Spencer Carlin," Ashley whispered when the blonde finally opened her eyes. She turned around and walked away from Spencer, leaving her speechless.

Well now. Spencer surely has to visit the pet store more often then, huh?

She thinks so.


	7. At Stake

Spencer shrugged her jacket closer to her body as a brisk chill suddenly made its presence known. She was starting to despise these things more and more as the seasons gradually changed. But, nevertheless, it was something she had to do. Her calling.

Her destiny.

And as she strolled through the empty graveyard, she wondered just what the hell she'd ever done to fate that she screwed her over so badly.

And that's when her cell phone rang.

It's not too terrible an occurrence most times, but when you're trying to be covert and stealth-like, a Ricky Martin ring-tone is not your best friend.

"What Aiden?" she snapped, barking into the receiver as loudly as she dared.

"Well, hello to you too," he said, sounding smarmy. "Catch you at a bad time?"

"Something like that," she grumbled, smacking a mosquito off of her arm. "What did you want?"

"I wanted to see if you were ready to finally give up the charade and go out with me," he said, and she could almost see his smirk.

Cocky bastard.

"I told you Aiden. I'm not interested," she answered, eyes taking on a vacant look as she droned the words yet again.

He was persistent. She had to give him that.

"Yeah, yeah. You like girls. But, seriously, you don't know what you're missing—"

"I do," she cut him off before he can get started. "That's why I'm hanging up now. Goodbye Aiden." And with that, she snapped her phone shut, holding the end button first to make sure it shut completely off.

No more distractions.

She had a job to do.

Getting back into slayer mode, the blonde surveyed the still still graveyard. Not a creature was stirring, not even a— hold on.

"Show yourself!" Spencer yelled suddenly, spinning on her heel to look behind her.

There was nothing there.

Odd. She could have sworn she felt someone's eyes on her. Turning back around, her heart nearly leapt out of her chest as she came face to face with a woman, or girl, seemingly her age.

A smirking girl.

"Jesus, what is your problem lady?" Spencer screeched, holding a hand over her heart, even as she gripped her weapon with the other. "You don't go sneaking up on people like that."

The girl's smirk melted into a mesmerizing smile and she bowed low, much like a gentleman in apology. Dangerously low, for the low cut tank top she was wearing. It distracted Spencer, somewhat. But only momentarily. "I'm sorry. I tend to surprise people a lot of the time."

"I bet you do," Spencer shot back, blinking sharply, her focus on high alert. "Surprise people that is."

The girl's smile widened, if that was even possible. "Ashley Davies," she said, holding out her hand for Spencer to take, only the blonde merely looked at it. Her defenses still up. The other girl only chuckled, the action making her brown eyes sparkle in the moonlight and her brown curls dance on her shoulders. "And you are?"

"I think we both know who I am," Spencer deadpanned, feeling an unrelenting urge to place her weapon down.

"I think you may be right," the brown haired girl said, back to smirking. "So, I guess the real question is… how come we're still talking?"

"No idea," Spencer grumbled before lashing out at Ashley, barely missing her as the other girl anticipated the surprise attack. Her momentum propelled her forward, and Spencer found herself vulnerable, unprotected.

And just like that Ashley brought a knee up, connecting with Spencer's toned stomach, knocking the air out of her. But Spencer recovered quickly, grabbing onto the brunette's arm and flipping her onto her back, taking out a stake and straddling her in no time.

There was quite the struggle with the weapon, Ashley underneath the girl gripping Spencer's hand with both of her own with little success. Spencer was driving the weapon down with a force ten times her own strength.

They rolled, three times even, and, on the last roll, Spencer found herself underneath the brunette, trying to hold her grip on a weapon that was being pulled from her grasp. Finally successful, the weapon was cast aside and Spencer's wrists were captured and stretched high above her body as Ashley settled down on top of her.

The stretched out position of Spencer's arms brought her body even closer to the other girl's and even though she was supposed to be in battle, she fought back a moan with everything she had.

"You, it appears, have been bested," Ashley breathed, her breath warm on Spencer's ear.

Spencer couldn't see her anymore, but she could feel the brunette's mouth dangerously close to her pulse point, which was beating wildly.

"You, it appears, talk too much," she managed to croak, belying the fear and worry she felt inside.

But Ashley could see through it, knew what she was feeling. "You don't have to be afraid," she told the trembling girl, moving away so that Spencer could see her sincerity.

"Just…do what you have to," Spencer said, cringing as she watched Ashley's sharpened teeth glisten as the moonlight illuminated her smile.

The brunette leaned down again, dropping her jaw and biting down gently on the girl's neck, right where her pulse was pounding. She pulled away, painfully slow, using her tongue to ease the slight ache her teeth might have caused.

Spencer could hear her breath, harsh and ragged on her ear. "I'm going to make you mine Spencer Carlin," the brunette whispered, licking tortuously slow at the other girl's earlobe before pulling away entirely and retreating into the darkness.

The blonde sat up, still breathing harshly. Her skin still burned from where Ashley's mouth had touched it, tasted it. She ran her fingers across her neck, surprised when she didn't feel a viscous liquid there.

The girl had left her unscathed. She couldn't help but smile at the thought, but that quickly melted into a frown as she realized, she'd been bested, by a vampire no less.

No, that would never do. She'd just have to re-up her training.

Determined now, she pushed herself off the ground, brushing off her bottom before retrieving her wooden stake and stalking out of the graveyard.

"Hey good-look—"

"Not tonight asshole," she told the guy, driving the stake into his chest, pulling it out and walking through the pile of dust that remained.

Not tonight, indeed.

---

They met up again a week later.

Spencer had spent the entire week training, working on her core, her awareness.

She was ready.

Or so she thought.

Their surroundings weren't conducive for this at all. It was just unsafe, but something about the brunette vampire pissed her off and made her throw caution to the wind.

Oh, she knew what it was now.

That smirk.

"Been training haven't we Carlin?" the brunette teased, hooking her arms under Spencer's as they locked up, bicep to bicep.

"Shut up," Spencer growled, head butting the girl a few times, loosening her grasp before kicking her squarely in the chest.

Ashley went flying back a few paces, steadying herself with a hand on the ground. She snapped her head back to look at Spencer, amusement still written across her face. Spencer panted heavily, rolling her neck to both sides. "Don't tell me you're getting tired already."

"Not even a little," Spencer growled, moving in on the attack again.

Ashley pushed herself off the ground, planting a nice kick square in Spencer's sternum, stunning the girl's forward momentum enough to get her bearings. She quickly went on the attack, throwing punches that the other girl countered with ease, blocking and sending some of her own.

At long last, she landed one, sending Spencer over the edge of the small platform they'd been fighting on.

She carefully peered over the edge, knowing the blonde was more than resourceful. After all, she'd survived the longest of any of the slayers. She was right in her assumption, only the blonde wasn't laying in wait to kick her.

No, she'd actually climbed on top of the platform and was now behind Ashley. "Looking for someone?"

Ashley jumped but was too slow and Spencer hurriedly grabbed her, wrapping an arm around her neck and another around her waist. For all intents and purposes trapping her.

She worked her stake free with the one hand, still holding Ashley tightly. "Got any last words?" she murmured, her rapid breaths tickling the brunette's ear.

Ashley's rusty chuckle sounded again, breathing rapidly though she didn't need to. "All of this just to get your hands on me? All you had to do was ask Carlin."

"Ugh," Spencer groaned, tightening her hold on the other girl. "Just shut up. Shut up."

"Why? What's wrong? Am I bothering you?" Ashley said smoothly, even as she struggled in Spencer's grasp.

"You know why," Spencer said, her grip on the stake twitching.

"I don't," Ashley said, this time her voice not amused or angered. She just sounded like Ashley. "Tell me," she whispered, then grunted as Spencer slammed her hard against the brick wall adjacent to them.

The girl brought the stake up, hand trembling, prepared the strike, Ashley's eyes closing in preparation.

But the blow never came.

Instead, Ashley blinked open her eyes, instantly connecting with blue ones, watery ocean blue eyes. "You _do_ know," the girl whispered, dropping the stake and pushing away from Ashley so fast you'd think the brunette was on fire.

Ashley blinked a second time, and in that short expanse of time Spencer made her escape.

Although, neither girl was certain who won that round.

---

Spencer had spent the day holed up in her room, replaying last night's events in her mind; wondering what the hell was wrong with her.

She had the brunette, had her right there, and she simply let her go. There is no other way to word it.

She flat out let the girl go.

In hindsight, she didn't really know why. She'd been obsessed with the brunette since their initial meeting. Secretly hoped she'd turn up on her nightly patrols again to have a second chance with the girl.

Initially, she'd thought she only wanted to kill her, but now, now she was second-guessing that whole notion of thinking. Especially after last night.

Unable to wrap her mind around it, then also not being able to forget about it, Spencer did the next best thing.

She climbed out of her bedroom window, sitting on top of the roofing that was there, a small area no more than thirty-six square feet. This was her refuge, her place to escape it all.

And smoke.

"I hear that's bad for you," an amused voice calls from below. "A real killer."

"Yeah, well, a lot of things are bad for me," Spencer remarked dryly, peering over the edge of her makeshift balcony as she took another drag. "Can't seem to quit those either," she added, shooting a pointed look in Ashley's direction.

"Touché," the brunette conceded, smiling rather adorably if Spencer _had_ to describe it. "Mind if I come up?"

"I don't feel like fighting," she murmured, although moving over a tad so that the brunette would fit comfortably.

Ashley jumped up in no time. "I'm not here to fight with you Spencer," the brunette admitted softly, settling down next to blonde.

"Then why are you here?"

"I needed to talk to you," Ashley said, unnerving the other girl with her stare.

"What about?" Spencer tried to appear aloof.

"Don't play that game. You know why," Ashley said, no longer teasing. Spencer bit her lip. "Why didn't you kill me last night?"

Spencer shrugged. "No reason."

"Bull,"

"Hey, you asked. Don't get upset because you don't like the answer," Spencer shot back, affronted. Ashley turned away from her, clenching a fist over and over. "Why didn't you kill me the first time we met?"

This time it was the brunette's turn to look uncomfortable. She kept her eyes on some fixed spot in front of her. "Because I kind of liked you," she mumbled out, barely audible.

"What?"

"Because I liked you okay," the brunette almost squealed. "I like you, Spencer."

Spencer almost choked on her cigarette. "You…like me?"

"That's what I said. What's the matter with you? I thought slayers have super senses or something," Ashley tired to quip, to lighten the mood. Tried and failed.

"Yeah," Spencer almost whispered, her mind re-playing Ashley's confession in her mind. "I like you too," she said abruptly, finally getting Ashley to look her in the eyes again. "I do."

The brunette smiled, a full one, fangs and all. Oh yeah, and there was _that_.

"So, where does this leave us?" Spencer asked, gesturing between the two of them. "You're a vampire. I'm the slayer. We aren't supposed to do this."

But Ashley only smiled again, a devilish glint in her eye as she leaned in close to the blonde. "Don't worry about it."

Their lips met, just barely brushing against each other at first, but that was only at first. Soon, Spencer found the brunette's tongue licking tortuously against her lower lip, begging for that first taste.

Spencer was happy to oblige, and as the kiss grew more feverish so did their aggression, Spencer having to pull away in a gasp as Ashley got a little rough.

"Ow," she gasped, holding a finger to her lip. "You bit me."

Ashley grinned sheepishly, moving Spencer's finger away to brush her own thumb against the reddish mark. "I'm sorry," she whispered, voice rough. She soothed the wound with her lips, barely brushing against it. "Better now?" she grinned, pulling back deliciously slow. She was surprised when Spencer leaned forward, tugging on her lower lip with her teeth, pressing just enough for Ashley to feel it.

When she pulled away, smirking at her handiwork and Ashley's dangerous quixotic smile. "I forgot to warn you," she said, voice full of delight. "I'm a bit of a biter."


	8. Soccer Field Charades

-----

Thanks a lot for the re-reviews and to you new readers, I hope you're enjoying the ride. Uh, let's see, the feedback is tremendous so keep it coming. It's really helping me get back into the writing mode. So, thanks again. Lurve ya'll.

-----

"Damn it Davies! Get your head in the game!" The Coach yelled from the sidelines. Even if it was a scrimmage game with her own team, she was expected to be focused.

"Sorry, Coach!" Davies screamed back. She shook her head slightly and made a dead sprint to the center of the field where the other players were fighting for the ball.

Sweat trickled down her forehead as her skilled feet broke into the crowd. She came face-to-face with a red-headed senior. "Come and get it, Davies." She growled, shifting the ball between her feet before kicking the ball toward the left of Davies and running after it.

"It's so on, Sheffield." Davies whispered to herself, taking off after the senior that was dominating the field.

Davies was a sophomore, bent on being the best on the team. And the best way for that to happen, take out the best player on the team. Thus giving her automatic respect and the title as best player.

Sheffield glanced up to see a pair of defenders in front of her. Psh. This is super easy. She easily tricked them, cutting her way around them. Just her and the goal now.

Or so she thought.

Davies came up on her right side, executing the perfect slide-tackle, removing the ball from Sheffield's feet. A cackle escaped her lips as she stood up, dribbling the ball once before passing it to one of the other mid-fielders.

"Oh, Sheffy, look who took the ball from you." Davies teased before jogging back up the field to help out her other teammates.

"You better watch out, Davies." Sheffield grumbled, giving her a shoulder check as she sprinted past the brunette girl.

Davies glared at the girl, running faster to reach her destination. "I think you're the one that ought to watch out, Sheffield." She shoved her shoulder into Sheffield's side as she battled for control of the white and black ball on the ground.

"Get. Out. Of. My. Way. Davies." Sheffield growled, her elbows being thrown into the mix as she thrust one into Davies' ribs.

The brunette screamed out in pain, but remained in the fight. "In your dreams, Sheffield." She brought her hands up and shoved the girl away, kicking the ball to one of her teammates.

Sheffield lifted her right foot and kicked at Davies' left calf, knocking her to the ground. "That's what you get when you don't listen, Davies." Sheffield hissed, turning from the girl writhing in pain on the ground.

Davies grabbed her leg and applied as much pressure as she could, her shin guards not giving her enough leeway to help ease her pain. She looked up to see her Coach sprinting toward her with the First Aid kit. "Shit." She grumbled under her breath.

"What the hell was that, Davies?" Coach scolded, bending down and quickly removing Davies' cleat and shin guard on her left leg. He fished in the kit for the Ace bandage.

"Oh, you mean Sheffield being an ass and trying to injure me right before the biggest game of the season?" Davies hissed as she felt the cloth being tightly woven around her calf.

"Yes, that. But you weren't exactly hiding the fact that you hate her either." Coach replied quickly, tying off the wrap and standing up.

"Why should I when she hates me just as much?" Davies asked, taking her Coach's hand and standing up.

Coach lifted Davies' left arm over his shoulder, helping her over to the sideline. "Damn it Davies. We're supposed to be a team, not trying to take out our own players because we hate them."

"Whatever." Davies mumbled as she sat down on the bench. The hot summer sun beat down on her as she raised her leg up onto the bench, waiting for the ice. "Does this mean I can't play on Saturday?"

Coach looked up at her and chuckled. "If your doctor says that you can, and I get a doctor's note from him, then you can play."

Davies smiled. "Thanks Coach."

"I think we found our starting center mid."

"No way." Davies' eyes opened wide. Coach just smiled as he turned back to watch the rest of the scrimmage game.

-----------

"Hey Carlin, good game." The other blonde senior patted her back as they left the field.

"Thanks, Free." Carlin replied. They reached the bench and each took their water bottles and took a big sip.

"Carlin!" A voice called out from other side of the group. Carlin turned and smiled brightly at the person the voice belonged to.

She jogged over and wrapped her sweaty arms around the boy. "I'm so glad you could make it." She placed a kiss upon his cheek.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, girl." The boy replied. "But man, you could have at least showered or something before hugging me."

Carlin swatted the boy's arm as she laughed with him. "Whatever. You know you love my body all sweaty."

"Oh yeah." The boy rolled his eyes. "But hey, I don't know if I'll be able to make it to the game this Saturday."

"What? Why?" Carlin questioned, her eyes showing disappointment.

"I work from nine until two-thirty." The boy answered. Carlin's face fell even more.

The game started at three and his job was at least a half hour away from the school's field.

"Well, can you at least try and make it?" Carlin replied, her voice breaking slightly.

"I'll try, Carlin." The boy whispered, pressing his lips against her cheek. "I'll do my best."

"Thanks." Carlin replied softly. "I'll see you later." She added before quickly turning around to make her way to the rest of her team.

Free noticed Carlin's sad stature. "What's up, girl?" She asked.

Carlin shook her head. "He doesn't know if he'll be able to make it to the game this weekend."

"You see him everyday though."

"This time is different."

"It's just a game."

"It's the biggest game of our season, Free." Carlin hissed, taking another big gulp of her water.

"Look, Carlin." Free whispered, placing her hand upon the blonde's shoulder. "He'll make it. You and I both know he will. So don't worry about it."

"I guess you're right." Carlin replied. She bent down and grabbed her duffle bag and started to make her way to the locker room with the rest of her team. "Sometimes I wish I didn't care if he was at our games."

"He's your brother, of course you're gonna care." Free answered, stepping into the cool building.

"Exactly why it shouldn't bug me." Carlin whispered harshly. "But it does. And I wish it didn't."

"Don't worry; he'll be there, Carlin. Just chill out, girl." Free responded, smacking her clean shirt against Carlin's back.

"You're gonna get it, Free." Carlin said. Both girls chuckled at the statement, grabbing their clothes and heading to the shower stalls.

-----------

"Alright girls, this is our biggest game of the season." Coach bellowed into locker room full of girls clad in their school colored uniforms. "I don't want any injuries today." His eyes found Sheffield's and Davies'.

Both girls turned and scowled at one another.

"Ok. Now Sheffield." The girl smiled. "I want you to be left forward. Thorne, center forward. You pass it as much as you can to Sheffield."

The brunette senior sitting on the edge of the bench nodded her head. Her freckles on her nose scrunching together as she smiled widely.

Coach continued to give out positions, each girl nodding their head in return.

"Alright girls, let's get out there and kick some Lumberjill butt!" Coach yelled, sticking his hand out into the center of the group of girls. Each one stuck out their right hand, forming a pile on top of their Coach's.

"Stingers on three!" Sheffield screamed.

"One, two, three, Stingers!" The team yelled out, raising their hands above their heads in triumph. They filed out of the room in a slow jog.

-----------

"Oh, and number four, Davies, just took out number seven, Carlin, with a side tackle." One of the announcers called out into the microphone.

"Yeah, looks as if Carlin's injured. She's clutching her leg." The second one pointed out.

"Ouch. I think maybe she's suffering from a sprained ankle. It might even possibly be broken."

"Oh look." The second said, looking out at the referee, taking out her little black book from her front shirt pocket. "And it's a red card."

The crowd erupted in loud "Boo's" and "Yay's". It was evident that the rival soccer game had lived up to its reputation.

"Looks like Davies is out for the next three games." The first announcer chuckled softly.

"Yeah, she should have been more careful." The second said agreeing. "Maybe this will put some perspective into that young head of hers."

-----------

"Get away from me Davies." Carlin hissed as she saw the brunette enter the trainer's room.

"Look, Carlin, I'm sorry." Davies whispered, taking a seat in the chair next to the table where the blonde was stationed.

Carlin shot a deathly glare at the brunette. "I don't care, Davies." She hissed. "Do you have any idea how much you just cost me?!"

Davies shook her head.

"There were scouts out there, Davies." Carlin said harshly. "Scouts from really good colleges. Colleges that I want to go to. And you fucking blew that for me."

"I'm sorry." Davies whispered.

"Just go back to your team, Davies." Carlin replied, her tone never wavering. "And grow up."

Davies stood up from the chair and stared at the senior. Ice was placed in a bag around her ankle surrounded by saran wrap to keep it in place.

"You'll be fine, Carlin." Davies whispered. "And I'm sure that the scouts won't over-look you."

Carlin rolled her eyes. Her eyes connected with the younger girl and her scowl instantly faded. She took in the sight of the tight black shorts and her jersey clinging to her sweat-clad body. Her brown locks tied up into a messy pony tail that showed off her facial features.

"Thanks Davies." Carlin said sincerely. She flashed the younger girl a smile.

"No problem, Carlin." Davies replied softly. Their eyes met in an intense gaze.

"Spencer." Carlin stuck out her hand to shake the smaller girl's hand.

"Ashley." Davies replied, taking the soft hand into her own, loving the feeling of Spencer's skin against her own. "Look, Spence, I'm sorry for hurting you. I didn't mean to."

"I know."

"And I'm sorry for possibly costing you those scholarships for the colleges."

"It's fine."

"I didn't think that I'd actually hurt anyone."

"Ashley."

"I mean, I almost hurt Sheffield during the scrimmage game, but that was nothing."

"Ashley." Carlin whispered harshly, breaking the brunette's ramble. "I said that it's fine."

Davies smiled. She walked over and took a seat next to the blonde. Her hand grazed the tips of Carlin's fingers as she sat down. "I'm still sorry, Spence."

Carlin shook her head. "Stop it, Ash…ley. Ashley." Both girls giggle. Their eyes catch again and they throw all caution aside as they lean forward.

Well, until a voice bellows in the hallway. "Spencey!"

Davies stands up and brushes her fallen hair behind her ear. "I'm gonna go." She whispers as she sees Carlin stretching her arms in front of her to take the boy into a warm hug.

Carlin looked over Glen's shoulder to see that Davies had a frown on her face. Her own face fell at the look of hurt crossed the brunette's face.

"You can leave now." Glen said harshly to the smaller girl.

Davies nodded her head and let out a deep sigh as she moved to exit the room.

"Hey Davies!" Carlin called out. The brunette turned and looked at the two still in an embrace. Carlin pushed the boy away from her body. "This is my brother, Glen," she said softly, nodding her head towards the boy.

The smile from before crept back onto Davies' lips as she turned around again, this time succeeding on leaving the room. "Good luck, Carlin!" Davies called back from the hallway.

"You too, Davies!" Carlin yelled in response. She pulled her brother into another hug.

"What was that about?"

Carlin shook her head. "Nothing. But I'm glad you made it, Glen."

"Anytime, sis."


	9. I Smell A Rat

"Spencer!" Glen called out from the bottom of the stairs. He stood there, wearing dark blue baggy jeans that hung down past his butt (ass, you choose), showing his white boxers with little tiny red hearts, along with an over-sized t-shirt sporting the saying, "I have the right to remain silent. I just choose not to."

"Chill out, Glen," Spencer huffed, sticking her arms into the sleeves of her lavender jacket.

"But we're gonna be late, Spence," Glen pouted. "And you know how much I hate being late for things like this."

Spencer rolled her eyes. "It's just a party. Seriously. It wouldn't kill you to be a half hour late."

"It's _my_ party, Spence," Glen hissed, grabbing her wrist and dragging her from the bottom of the stairs to the front door, pausing long enough for him to open the door. "And I really don't want all the food to be gone by the time we get there."

"The food will still be there, Glen," Spencer hissed, climbing into the passenger seat and buckling her seatbelt.

Glen started the car and put it into reverse. "Not while Aiden is there. That dude can down those pizzas in no time flat."

"Whatever," Spencer deadpanned, staring out her window, not paying attention to the facts Glen was spewing off in an attempt to make it so he was right. That'll never happen.

--

"Hey! Sara!" Ashley called out from the back of the counter. She stood there, in her black slacks and bright red t-shirt that sported her work's name.

_Chuck E. Cheese._

The younger brunette girl popped around the corner to see Ashley covered in pizza dough and half of the unbaked pizza hanging on off of the counter.

The other half on the floor.

"Holy shit, Ash. What the hell did you do?"

Both girls giggled at the sight of the kitchen area: Pizza dough strewn about on the counters and the floor; some of it even managed to stick to the ceiling.

Don't ask.

"Help me, Sara." Ashley pleaded, pointing to her head where, sure enough, more pizza dough rested.

Sara laughed harder at the other girl's state of attire. "Sure, Ash. I mean, we don't want you to be mistaken for a pizza and have you thrown into the oven."

Ashley lifted her hand and raised it, hitting Sara on her arm. "Shut up, Sara. Just help me with this, please? I have to change," Ashley whined, pulling at the batter on her head.

"Oh yeah, I forgot. Today's your first day," Sara pointed out, taking all the dough off of Ashley's head and throwing it down onto the counter.

Ashley let out a deep sigh. "Yeah, it is." She ran her fingers through her messy brown curls to make it seem a little more presentable to the public.

"Good luck, Ash," Sara breathed out. She brought her rag to the counter and started wiping it down.

"Thanks, Sara. Means a lot." Ashley shot her a smile that made her nose crinkle in the process.

--

"Glen?" Spencer called out as they pulled up to the…restaurant. "Glen, you didn't say that it was gonna be _here_."

"And where else would it be?" Glen smiled at his sister before ejecting himself from the car. He started walking to the front doors, not even bothering to see if Spencer was going to follow him. All he wanted to do was eat and play games.

Typical guy.

Spencer rolled her eyes before following suit. She pulled the bright red doors to the…restaurant open as she stepped inside; Children frolicking around the tables and racing each other to play games.

Oh wait.

That's Glen and Aiden.

"Hey guys!" Spencer called out, causing both boys to stop in their tracks. They turned to look at her, each wearing an 'I didn't do it' smirk. "You know where we're supposed to be at?"

Glen pointed his finger to the far table in the back that was scattered with paper plates, a few presents, and an already cooked pizza.

Yum.

Spencer nodded her head, letting the boys go back to their race to the basketball game. God, boys and their egos. She leaned back and rested her hands behind her head. A sigh escaped her lips as she reveled in the moment of being free from everything and everyone. Just Spencer time.

Well that lasted all of thirty seconds.

A loud cackle erupted from the middle of the arcade area. Spencer groaned as she stood up from the booth. She heard Aiden's squeal of a laugh in between the children's.

As soon as she turned around the Jurassic Park™ safari game, she came face to face with a bunch of snotty-nosed, booger-eating, mud-playing, scab-picking, ankle-biting kids all in a group around Chuck E. Cheese.

They were pulling at the shirt that he wore, occasionally kicking the big shoes, hoping to knock the person over. And of course Glen and Aiden were the masterminds.

Glen was yanking the tail to the costume as Aiden tugged on the big nose.

Spencer could almost hear the person inside crying.

"Get away from him!" Spencer screamed loudly. The crowd halted and turned slowly around to hear the booming voice. "Glen, drop the tail."

Glen dropped the tail.

"Aiden, let go of the nose."

And let go of the nose Aiden did.

You certainly don't want to mess with a pissed off Spencer.

"Back away from the rat," she hissed to the children.

They took a few steps back, watching as the blonde walked over to the rat and wrapped her arm around one of the shoulders. "It's a mouse," a little boy replied, his lisp evident as he spoke.

"I don't care what it is. It's wrong to torture animals like this," Spencer shot back, her piercing blue eyes shooting daggers down to the little boy. Who, by the way, turned and ran away crying.

"Dude, Spence, it's just a dude in a costume," Aiden pointed out with a small chuckle.

And cue pissed off Spencer.

"It doesn't matter if it's a person inside of here or not. You shouldn't be treating animals or people like this. How would you like it if an over-sized rat was pulling your nose, stretching your shirts and jeans, or kicking your shoes to make you fall over?"

The mouths of everyone in the crowd, well what was left of it, dropped to the floor.

Spencer nodded her head and a knowing smirk crept onto her lips. "Let's get you outta here," she whispered to the person in the rat suit. She watched as the costume head nodded in approval.

The rat turned and walked as fast as he could to the employee lounge.

You think Spencer has cooled down?

Well, you thought wrong.

Spencer rotated on her feet, coming face to face to the lone stragglers of the group. She narrowed her eyes at the two teen boys that caused this entire ordeal.

"Just chill out, Spence." Glen gave an uneasy chuckle as he raised his hands in defense, slowly backing out of the arcade area.

"Yeah, don't go all PETA on us." Aiden mirrored Glen's movements. God, could this boy do anything by himself?

Spencer smiled softly at the boys. "Look. I'm not gonna hurt you." Both boys let out a sigh of relief. "But." Their eyes bugged. "If you don't behave yourself, I will make sure everyone knows what's really in those pants of yours."

_Gulp._

Out of the corner of her eye, Spencer spotted a brunette boy around her height exit the employee lounge. She jogged over to the boy, slipping her arms around one of his. "Hey," she whispered.

"Uh, hi," the boy replied, furrowing his eyebrows together in confusion. "Do I know you?"

"Oh, I'm Spencer," She replied, untangling their arms to stick out her hand to shake his.

Still confused, the boy wrapped his fingers around her hand, giving it a gentle shake. "Travis."

"Yeah, look. I'm sorry about the kids. And I'm really sorry that my brother and friend were the cause of it," Spencer explained, her cheeks taking a small shade of red.

"What?" Travis asked, letting out a small uneasy laugh at the blonde girl's words.

As if Spencer's cheeks couldn't go any redder, she now looked like a ripened tomato. "You know, the kids that were pulling your tail."

Still, Travis was confused.

"When you were in the rat suit."

"_Oh_, that wasn't me." Travis chuckled.

Now it was Spencer's turn to be confused. "What do you mean, not you? I just saw you come out of the lounge." Travis nodded his head. "And I saw you go in with the rat suit on."

Travis shook his head. "That was Ashley."

"Well that's a weird name for a guy." Spencer giggled.

"Uh, right." Travis lifted his right hand and rubbed his neck while giving a short chuckle. "Ash'll be right out. You can wait here for…_him_."

Spencer smiled and nodded her head, not really paying attention to the boy's demeanor. She rocked back and forth on her feet while playing with the hem of her shirt. She flung her head up at the sound of the opening employee lounge door.

A short brunette woman re-emerged from the lounge, her brown eyes meeting Spencer's piercing blue ones. "Hey," she whispered.

"Hi," Spencer replied, peeking over the girl's shoulder to see someone else in the lounge. "Is Ashley in there?"

"No," the girl said shortly while giving a small laugh.

Spencer's face fell. "Oh, well do you know where he is?"

"Right here." A cheeky grin crept onto the smaller girl's lips. She stuck out her hand to shake the blonde's. "Thanks for saving me. It's my first day as Chuck and it went really horrible."

"Uh huh." Spencer swallowed hard, shaking Ashley's hand gently before dropping it quickly. "You're a…girl."

Ashley chuckled. "Yeah I am." She lifted her left hand and ran it through her messy brown curls.

"But you're…a girl."

"Yeah, I am." Ashley's laughing subsided as she stared up at the confused blonde. "Look, obviously I'm not the person you were expecting. But let me at least make this up to you."

Spencer continued to stare. But at least she nodded her head.

"Okay good," Ashley smiled. She grabbed Spencer's hand and drug her to a table in one of the corners, away from everyone else. "I'll be right back," Ashley muttered, turning and running to the kitchen, leaving Spencer with her thoughts.

"_**She's a girl**__. But she's really sweet. _**She's**_** a girl**__. But those eyes. __**Still a Girl**__. Those soft fingers. __**Still a **_**Girl**_. Those full lips. __**Still a Girl!**__ I wonder what they'd feel like. __**Spencer! She's a girl!**__"_ Spencer let out a sigh as she watched Ashley's tiny form walking back to her.

"Hey, I got us some breadsticks. Pizza will be coming shortly." That nose-crinkling, cheeky grin crept onto her lips again. "You alright?"

Spencer shook her head, breaking the feud of thoughts in her brain as she took in the view of the young woman in front of her. "Yeah," she breathed out.

The girls sat in silence. "Hey Ashley?" Spencer finally asked.

"Hmm?" The muffled response from the brunette came from the fact that she had shoved half a breadstick in her mouth.

"You wanna go out tomorrow?" Spencer asked softly, her cheeks tingeing with a crimson palette.

Ashley nearly choked on the half-chewed breadstick, causing the blonde's eyes to bug open. She stood up and sat down next to the brunette. "You alright?" She raised her right hand and lightly tapped Ashley's back to calm her.

After a few short coughs, Ashley was able to swallow the food. "Yeah, I'm good," she said, her face slightly red and puffy. "Did you mean what you asked though?" She felt Spencer's hand still on her back, drawing small circles on it.

"Yeah, I did," Spencer said softly, that crimson color coming back to her cheeks. She gave Ashley a bright smile as she removed her hand from the brunette's back.

"Then yes, I would love to," Ashley replied, that nose-crinkling smile covering her face once again as she locked eyes with the blonde.


	10. Mrs and Mrs Smith

**A/N: Again, this is for the grown-ups.**

**--**

It's just a job.

Just a regular nine to five like any other blue-collar gig.

She had one of the more "undesirable" professions though.

She was responsible for taking out the trash.

As she held Palmer, one of the most lucrative (and most deceitful) drug dealers in all of Los Angeles, over the roof of the high-rise building by his ankles, she was again reminded of that fact.

Spencer sighed.

The pleas for mercy were even boring her now.

Not that she'd ever give in to them.

This was her job after all, and she did have bills to pay.

They were just entertaining every once in a while.

"Please, please," the man begged, feeling her grip loosen on his foot. "I'll give you anything you want. I'll buy you an island. I'll buy you Hawaii."

_Interesting, _she ventured amusedly, a smirk crossing her face. _Hawaii? Now we're talki- wait, I got food poisoning last time I visited._

Without a second thought Spencer let the man go, walking away even before his screams were swallowed by distance.

_Poor guy, _she thought, climbing back down the air vent. _He should have said Australia; at least my pen pal lives there._

-----------

Going through the motions.

10:02

That's what Ashley Davies was doing.

Going through the motions.

And looking pretty damn good doing it.

The mirrored room they were in really did do wonders.

10:03

Two more minutes.

Two more minutes and she could finally pull the trigger.

She could finally blow this slow ass town.

Two more minutes and she could…finally get something to eat.

Well, one minute now.

"God, would you just get it over with," the guy yelled, the mask over his face muffling the sound. That part wasn't specified in the file, but after a couple of minutes his cock-eye was really starting to bother her.

"Just kill me, you fucking coward bitch," he snarled before muttering. "Can't even look me in the face."

Ashley let that one slide.

He was about to die after all.

No need to make him shit himself.

Again.

She glanced down at her watch.

Fifteen seconds.

Wonder why the timing had to be so specific.

"I know. You're scared," he barked out, really going at her now. "That's because you're a little girl sent to do a big man's job."

CRACK.

That's the sound his neck made when she snapped it.

Call her a bitch, a whore, a bitch ass whore, but never, EVER, say that Ashley Davies can't do a job better than a man.

She'll drop you where you stand.

Unfortunately, she dropped this guy two seconds too late and now the security system was activated.

_Great,_ she thought, tying her hair back. _Just great._

She looked the body over, rifling through his shirt pockets and searching for the hotel key card. "I'm sure you don't mind if I borrow this," she said, smirking when she pulled the plastic card from his jacket pocket. "Fuckin' asshole," she muttered, kicking him over before using his chair to climb up into the ceiling.

_And he made me break a nail._

_Bastard._

-----------

Spencer rolled over and annihilated her alarm clock.

Was it morning already?

It seemed like she'd just gotten in. She grabbed her cell and saw that she had a message from the agency: a new assignment.

Level: Red.

_Ooh, goody. A challenge,_ she thought, heading off for the showers.

**Meanwhile, across town…**

Ashley was just finishing brushing the tangles out of her hair when her phone went off.

_For the love of God, if that's my sister…_

It wasn't. It was the agency, with a new assignment; in town, too.

A level red.

She couldn't prevent the smile from gracing her lovely features.

Maybe she'd stick around for this last one.

-----------

**The Red Dragon Restaurant**

**6:30 P.M.**

Ashley was trying to be inconspicuous.

Kinda hard when you looked as good as she did and was eating alone.

"Um, excuse me," some tall drink of water asked, smiling politely. "May I join you?"

Ashley smiled as nicely as she could manage considering he was a guy. "No thank you."

The man gave a little pout. "Why?"

"Because I'm expecting someone,"

"Well, can I join you until he gets here?" he asked, but it wasn't really a question because he was already sitting, and Ashley was contemplating her salad fork with new interest.

A hand was placed on the man's shoulder though, drawing his eyes and hers upwards. "_He_ won't get here," the blonde said, a smirk set firmly on her face. "But I will, and you're in my seat."

"Okay," the man swallowed back, seeing the dangerous spark in her darkened blue eyes. "I'll just be going."

"Buh-bye now," Spencer said sarcastically, never taking her eyes off of him as she took the seat across from Ashley.

"Can I ask what you are doing?" the brunette asked, looking at the other woman incredulously. She wasn't used to her targets being so…personal.

"I'm having dinner," Spencer said. _And you're having your last_, her subconscious added.

"But I don't know you," Ashley reasoned, taking her napkin and folding it in her lap anyway.

"Nor I you," Spencer said, mimicking her actions, before sticking out her hand. "Spencer Carlin," she said, raising a coy eyebrow.

She already knew who the other woman was.

"Ashley Davies," the brunette returned, shaking the offered hand. Their eyes flashed for a moment at the contact.

There was a certain charge behind that brief connection. A spark.

They both thought it was mutual admiration.

Neither thought it was attraction.

They were both wrong.

-----------

Ashley was enjoying herself.

She hadn't had this much fun with a woman in…ever.

It was like Spencer just got her. She understood her intricacies, how she thought that the secret sauce on the McDonald's Big Mac was PURE EVIL and why bunny rabbits were gonna take over the world.

And she got Spencer too. She wholeheartedly understood the blonde's fear of sea gulls and all birds really, and she sincerely felt for her when she regaled the tale about the pigeon pooping on her.

Was she really gonna have to kill this woman? Was the universe that cruel?

Spencer, on the other hand, was totally having second thoughts about what she had to do.

Maybe she could disappear and take the woman with her, live out the rest of her life as a fugitive. At least then she'd get to-

"FUCK!" Ashley yelled. She'd just glimpsed her watch. She was running out of time.

"What's wrong?" Spencer asked.

"Youwannagotomyroom?" Ashley rushed out, her cheeks reddening afterward.

Spencer smiled; a lascivious smile. "And what would we do in your room?"

-----------

**Ten minutes later…**

Ashley slammed Spencer up against the hotel room wall, the force behind it enough to bruise even the largest man, but not someone as strong as Spencer.

She wrapped her legs around the brunette's hips, pulling her closer. Using her arms to grip the light sconces on either side of her, she pushed them forcefully away from the wall.

Ashley stumbled just slightly after the weight shift, before righting herself and pushing her back against the wall. "What are you doing?" she whispered before roughly taking her lips again.

"I'm trying to…" Spencer trailed off, Ashley's lips making it difficult to do much of anything. She swallowed hard as the brunette's tongue left a burning trail from her jaw to her collarbone, before she brought her legs back down, and pushed Ashley away.

The brunette smirked as she stumbled backwards again, Spencer quickly approaching, she made a running leap for the other woman and Ashley found herself on the floor, Spencer atop of her and she had no complaints.

"Why are we still wearing clothes?" Spencer breathed the question against her lips. "It's not practical to do these sorts of things with clothes."

"I just thought you didn't want me to see the gun you have holstered to your right," Ashley shifted slightly. "No, left thigh," she amended with a raised brow.

Spencer pulled back. "It's for protection."

Ashley smirked. "Sure it is."

"Well," Spencer asked. "I'm sure that's not a periscope in your pocket."

Ashley reached down and extracted the rather long knife from its resting place. "Oops."

"Whatever," Spencer muttered, ripping her shirt open. "We can do this and then see what happens."

"Mmm kay," Ashley mumbled. Mumbled because she was too busy kissing each and every inch of Spencer's newly exposed chest.

Spencer groaned when Ashley's lips surrounded her left breast. She arched against the touch and nearly lost her mind when she felt slender fingers graze the top of her jeans. _So she's one to dominate, huh? Not for long_, she thought.

The brunette smiled against the skin of Spencer's breast when the blonde let out a gasp. Her fingers had somehow managed to slip inside the woman's jeans and brushed against her bare skin. _Dang. And I thought the only thing this wet was…_

Her thoughts were cut short when she felt Spencer's fingers against her own center. _Gotta one up me, huh Spencey?_

Their lips melded together as their fingers move frantically inside the other's body. Spencer was the first to pull back, only to press her lips against the brunette's neck.

"Sp-Spencer," Ashley growled hotly against the blonde's ear. Spencer chuckled, her lips brushing intimately on the brunette's collarbone.

The blonde moved her fingers faster inside of the smaller woman. She watched as Ashley's eyes shut and her breathing became more ragged. Her movements nearly ceased when Ashley's fingers mirrored her own.

"Oh fuck," Spencer breathed out. Ashley smiled against the blonde hair, their fingers pressing against each other, causing each of them to fall over the edge of ecstasy.

Spencer collapsed onto the brunette beneath her, crashing her lips against the other woman's to convey her thoughts. Which were…holy fuck, that was hot.

**Even later…**

"Oh God," Spencer groaned, her eyes rolling into the back of her head. They were naked now and she was pressed against the hotel window, and she had no idea lesbians could do this.

Ashley held her up with both hands as she thrust against her again, their centers hot and insistent against each other.

"This is so hot," she panted hotly against the side of Spencer's face. "You're so hot."

Spencer fisted the other woman's hair, forcefully pulling her mouth back to kiss her frantically. Hell, if she was gonna go out, she was gonna go out with a bang.

The glass rattled against the pane.

And a bang.

It rattled again.

And a bang.

"Shit," she cursed her body for betraying her again. If she came…again, Ashley would have the one-up on her and that just wouldn't do. They'd have to do it together this time.

She snaked her free hand down, completely trusting Ashley to hold her up. She found what she was searching for and quickly, yet gently slid three fingers into her, moaning into Ashley's mouth at the sensation.

Ashley's knees buckled against the sudden yet welcome intrusion. _Spencer Carlin plays dirty,_ she thought, her body starting to tremble already. _Well, two can play that game._

She tightened her left arm's grip around Spencer before sliding her other hand around, easily slipping her fingers into Spencer's core, her pace slow and steady to drive the blonde crazy.

"Jesus Christ," Spencer muttered, breaking their lip-lock. "Would you just fuck me already?"

Ashley, even though she was being fucked senseless, couldn't help but smile. That was the second time in two days someone's asked her to hurry up.

She couldn't help but think that she was being more sadistic this time. As Spencer's pace quickened so did hers, both frantic. They were close…so close, and the orgasm was bound to be cataclysmic.

That much was certain.

I don't think they intended to break the hotel window though.

Thank goodness it was a double-pane.

"Holy shit," Spencer breathed as she and Ashley both collapsed to the floor in a sweaty heap of limbs, too tired to bother moving.

Ashley would have echoed the sentiment but she was too out of breath to do anything, so instead she turned her head and kissed Spencer with everything she had.

And then they fucked again.

Good grief.

-----------

Come morning the two women were woven into one another, completely exhausted. Spencer was wrapped tightly around Ashley, her head resting on her chest, her left leg draped over the brunette's. Ashley had the other woman wrapped in her arms, resting her chin against the crown of her head, pressing her loaded gun next to the sleeping woman's temple.

What?

She _was_ an assassin.

It would've been so easy to pull the trigger right then and there. She'd never have to look into those blueberry eyes if she did it now.

She'd never get to look into those blueberry eyes if she did it right now.

She'd never see them widen in ecstasy or cloud over with lust or shimmer with amusement.

_Fuck this_ she thought, tossing her gun aside and kissing the sleeping girl's forehead.

They'd figure something out.


	11. Are You Afraid of the Dark

Ashley tugged her jacket closer to her frame. It never rains in southern California but when it does it pours.

Buckets.

It does absolutely suck that the one day she should be at home in her warm, dry, bed; she'd be out in the streets.

It was her stupid English teacher's fault.

"This Willa Cather paper must be turned in by Monday. If you fail to do so I will result in an automatic write-up."

This instruction wasn't for the whole class; only her.

Threats were the only way to get the wild-child to do homework.

So now, on this rainy Sunday afternoon, she was headed to the library.

Joy.

She finally made it to the double doors, yanking on one only to be thwarted when it didn't give.

'Oh hell no,' she thought, tugging frantically on both door handles. 'If this fucker is closed and I can't get in-'

The door was pulled inward, bringing her soaking self with it. Then she heard the softest voice she ever heard say, "You have to push it."

Her head snapped upward and her brown eyes locked onto blue ones, blue ones which sparkled with a hint of amusement.

"Oh," she said shyly, a sheepish smile on her face.

Then the girl turned and walked back to the counter, busying herself behind a mountain of books. She peeked her head out from around the right side. "Let me know if you need some help," she said, smiling at Ashley, those blue eyes now bespectacled.

"Okay," Ashley said, stepping into the actual library…finally.

The place was deserted, absolutely empty aside from the two of them…oh, and a napping security guard.

She sat down at a table, opening her backpack and removing the necessary materials: her lit book, pens, notebook, and highlighters. She set them out meticulously, each item already having a place to go, in her mind.

She had a mild case of OCD.

Feeling eyes on her she looked up suddenly, only to see the blonde girl behind the counter turn back quickly to some paperwork, her hair still whipping around giving her away.

Well, that and the blush working it's way across her cheeks as Ashley still stared.

Ashley grinned. This rainy day was starting to look up. "Oh, librarian. Can you help me with something?"

"_Then, because the picture making mechanism was crushed, the disturbing visions flashed into black, and Paul dropped back into the immense design of things,"_ Ashley closed her book, the pages whooshing together and then flapping shut with a quiet thud. "Wow," she breathed out.

"Intense huh?" Spencer asked her, nodding nonetheless.

"Very," the brunette whispered.

"I couldn't imagine being immersed in darkness,"

"Afraid of the dark?" Ashley asked, flashing a wicked grin.

Spencer fit her with a look of her own, an undertone flashing beneath that innocent façade. "Terrified."

After the initial pretense of having the blonde help her she quickly fell into actually having the blonde help her. It turns out they went to school together but since they were in college, it wasn't really shocking that they'd never crossed paths before.

Or so Ashley thought.

"We've actually met before," Spencer told her.

Ashley's brow creased. There's no way that would have happened and she would have forgotten it. "I don't think that's possible," she told the blonde girl, frank but honest.

"But it is and was. You were stomping across the quad and I was still new and, well," the blonde rolled her eyes slightly, a tinge of pink on her cheeks, "I wasn't really watching where I was going, eyes on the floor and all, and I shoulder-checked you, sending a couple of your books crashing to the floor."

Ashley's eyes clouded over, trying to remember the event.

"But, uh, you didn't make too big a deal of it. So, I handed you your stuff back and you barely looked at me before you stomped away," the blonde concluded, tucking some fallen hair behind a perfectly sculpted ear.

Again, a perfectly sculpted ear, according to Ashley.

"So, yeah, we have met before," Spencer continued, after a few moments of continued silence. It was becoming fairly obvious that she was unbelievably uncomfortable with the way Ashley was looking at her. She played with her glasses a little, something Ashley had determined was a nervous tick.

"Hmm," Ashley drawled. "I'd better start paying better attention," she practically purred.

Spencer involuntarily gave a little shudder. "Maybe."

But that was before.

Now Ashley had selected a story to write on and there was really no reason for Spencer to be with her…at the table…so close.

Yeah, no reason.

It wasn't like Ashley was a complete idiot.

She knew how to cross her T's.

"You still need me?" Spencer asked.

"Yes, please."

But she could always use a hand dotting those I's.

An hour and she was finished.

In spite of trying to drag out the process, spending as much time as humanly possible on the paper, they'd finally weaned all the intricacies and nuances out of _Paul's Case_, and the finished product was Pulitzer Prize worthy.

"Well, I guess that's that," Spencer said, sounding a little dejected.

Ashley looked back at her for the longest time, debating whether or not she should make her move, but before she could do anything, the lights in the room flickered once before going out.

"Eek," Spencer quietly exclaimed.

"It's okay," Ashley assured her. "It's just a power outage or something."

"I…I don't like the dark," Spencer whispered, a hint of fear creeping into her voice.

"We can go sit in my car. I'll put on the interior lights," Ashley offered, moving to get up and nearly getting the meat squeezed out of her arm.

"Can we?" the blonde asked, panicked.

"Come on," Ashley told her, gently un-clamping the girl's hand from her wrist, but then lacing her fingers with her own.

Using her cell phone for light, Ashley illuminated the way to the library door, and making sure to pull this time she was again, stumped.

"What the hell? I'm totally opening it right this time,"

"Oh man," Spencer groaned.

"What?"

"The door works on automatic locks. And when the power went down…"

"So did the system…great," Ashley sighed, raking her hand through her hair. "Isn't there a key or something?"

Spencer's eyes lit up. "Yeah, Donny has them,"

"Who?"

"The security guard," Spencer informed her, pulling the brunette along. They didn't get far as a loud thumping at the door sounded then, nearly scaring Spencer out of her skin, and Donny the security guard stood there, drenched.

Long story short: Donny went out for a cigarette break at the most inopportune of times. He got locked out and without his keys. We mention keys because the doors could only be manually unlocked from the outside, where Donny was, without his keys.

"I'm gonna go see if I can get some help!" he yelled through the glass doors.

"Okay!" Spencer yelled back, nodding, still clutching tightly onto Ashley's hand. Within seconds the man had disappeared and she was again alone in the dark, with Ashley.

"Wanna go sit down?" Ashley asked her, tugging her along before she could respond.

Spencer nodded, her eyes scanning the darkness. She sat down in the hard wooden chair with a sigh. "I'm sorry I'm being such a spazz."

Ashley smiled warmly. "You're not."

Spencer gave her a look.

"Okay, maybe a little,"

"I just…don't like the dark," Spencer repeated, sounding a little conflicted.

"I'm not a big fan," Ashley confessed, scooting closer to Spencer. "But there are some pretty awesome things you can do in the dark."

"Like what?" Spencer mused, enjoying the playful lilt in Ashley's voice.

"Well, first of all, there's the magic that is shadow puppets," Ashley said, breaking out the cell phone again and then fashioning a smashing rabbit.

Spencer giggled, and then guffawed as Ashley's rabbit transformed into a dog.

"But, shadow puppets aside," Ashley said, closing her cell. "There's something else we could do."

It was devastatingly dark now. And all they could really make out was the space two inches I front of them. But that couldn't be right, because if it was, then Ashley's face was now in dangerous proximity of Spencer's, her breath tickling her cheek.

"Would you like to know what that is?" Ashley whispered, but it sounded like so much more than a whisper. And it echoed…over and over again.

"Spencer?"

"Yes," Spencer gave up her answer. "Yes."

And then she was kissing her, soft and slow. Then wet and sensual. Then hot and heavy.

She didn't know for exactly how long they had made out, or how she ended up seated on the table, Ashley standing between her legs, intermittently pressing wet kisses on her face: her eyes, her nose, her chin…any skin was fair game.

"You really shouldn't be afraid of the dark Spence," Ashley whispered, claiming her lips once again.

With Ashley there, holding her close, Spencer decided that maybe, just maybe, she wasn't.


	12. Diamond In The Rough

"Aiden, I swear to God, if you don't take your hands off of me I'll…" Spencer gasped.

Oh, Aiden was covering her eyes. Just in case you didn't know.

Pervs.

"I kinda wanted this to be a surprise," Aiden said softly. He wrapped his arm around the blonde's waist, pulling her closer.

Spencer turned and wrapped her arms around the man's neck. She leaned up and pressed her lips against his in a chaste kiss. (A/N: No, we're not Spaiden shippers. Chillax.)

They pulled away and glanced at the setting. He set up their backyard as a picnic area. Little black table with a white lace tablecloth and a single lit candle in the center. (Cheesy, we already know.)

"Aide, this is perfect." Spencer whispered. Her bright smile shone as she looked up at the brunette man again. Her lips caressed his cheeks before her fingers wove into his.

**-------------**

Ashley stood behind the counter of her work. She just finished one of the biggest sales of the day. A diamond tennis bracelet coupled with a four karat diamond ring.

The husband wasn't too pleased, but the wife insisted on getting both.

But that's when Ashley saw it. That tiny little bugger that escaped her wrath each and every time that they met. Those tiny eyes with all those legs.

Well, let's just say that she was no longer behind the counter. She was holed up in the employee room to get away from that…thing.

"Ashley?" A voice called out. It knocked on the locked door of the lounge. "Ashley? Are you in there?"

"No," the brunette squeaked. She stood on one of the wood chairs in the back corner.

The voice let out a long sigh. "Ashley, please come out of there."

"Not until that thing is gone," the younger girl huffed out.

The sound of the door unlocking filled the room and Ashley cowered even more against the wall. The voice giggled at the sight.

"What are you laughing at, Danielle?" Ashley growled.

The older woman laughed even harder at Ashley's attempt to be tough in this particular situation. "You," she snorted.

That caused Ashley to stifle a laugh. "What about me?" she asked after regaining her composure.

"You're…table…funny," Danielle choked out. She was nearly doubled-over from laughter.

"I'm sure that you wouldn't be laughing if you were in my shoes," Ashley snapped, her eyes searching behind the older woman for the…thing.

Danielle let her laughter die out. She wiped her eyes from the tears that fell. "Oh yeah," she sighed, letting it all out of her system. "And you'd be right here laughing at me."

Ashley narrowed her eyes, trying to glare at the woman. Didn't work out so well because she cracked a smile. "Yeah, whatever," she huffed. She was just about to step down, until she saw it.

And she squealed.

Danielle laughed again.

"Dani! Kill it!" Ashley screamed. She pointed behind the older woman at the thing that was on the counter now.

The older woman turned and caught sight of the thing. Her laughter only heightened. "That's what you're so afraid of?"

Ashley nodded her head. She watched as Danielle walked over to the counter. She took off her left shoe and squished the bug where it stood. "That better?" she asked, wiping the bug off her shoe and the counter with a paper towel.

"Thank you, Dani," Ashley said, very much relieved. "I hate those things," she admitted, standing on the solid ground.

"Yeah, no problem," Danielle replied, slipping her shoe back on. "You got customers, though."

Ashley wrapped her arms around the older woman's neck for a quick hug. "Thanks again, Dani." Her tiny body slid past the other woman to the front of the store.

**-------------**

"Hey Spence?" Aiden asked, wiping his mouth of the food he just ate.

Spencer brought her napkin up to her own lips, wiping them of the food. "Yeah, Aide?"

"Do you think that you could…scoot your chair back a little?"

"Sure…" Spencer's eyebrows furrowed together as she complied with his request.

"Little bit more." Aiden used his hands to motion for her to continue scooting back.

Still confused, Spencer followed his request. "What's this about, Aiden?"

The brunette man scooted his own chair back before kneeling on one knee next to his girlfriend. He reached into his right pocket and pulled out a small velvet box.

Spencer's eyes grew wide.

Is he gonna…

Yup.

He opened the box to reveal a ring. "Spencer Carlin," he began, removing the ring from the box. He grabbed her left hand and held it in his own. "Will you do me the honor of being my wife?"

Spencer's mouth was wide open. Like a truck could drive through there. "I—Aiden, this is unexpected."

"I know. And my high school ring will have to do until we can go and pick out a proper ring tomorrow. That is if you want to." His voice fell and he was anticipating the shoot-down.

"Of course I want to, Aiden," Spencer blurted out. Their smiles were matching. How corny.

Aiden slipped the ring onto her left ring finger before picking her up out of the chair and pressed their lips together as he swung her around.

**-------------**

"I want this one," Spencer pointed out a ring that had a large diamond in the center that was surrounded by smaller, yet still beautiful diamonds.

Yeah, Spencer's a pricey girl.

Aiden grimaced. "Are you sure, Spence? I mean, can't you get one like…a little cheaper?"

Spencer's eyes narrowed and she cocked an eyebrow at her, now, fiancé. "Aiden," she warned.

The man swallowed hard. Yeah, he knew not to mess with Spencer when she wanted something. He started to open his mouth when they both noticed a beautiful brunette walk up to them.

"Ashley Davies," she smiled, sticking out her hand. "How can I help you today?"

"Spencer Carlin," Spencer replied, shaking the brunette's hand. She tilted her head to her right where Aiden stood. "And this is Aiden Dennison. My fiancé."

Ashley smirked.

Spencer saw a twinkle in her chocolate eyes. And she smiled back. "We're looking for engagement rings." She emphasized 'engagement' for some odd reason…

"Well, might I recommend…" Ashley began. She walked behind the counter and took out a smaller ring than the blonde was looking at before. "This one. It's only two karats, but it's very elegant and it's not as chunky as the other ones."

The women locked eyes and Ashley winked at Spencer. "Hey, Aide. Why don't you go look in the sports store for some new baseball thingamajiggers?"

"Yes," Aiden squealed. He kissed his fiancée's cheek quickly before turning and running toward the sports store. At least six stores away.

"So," Ashley started. Her fingers gently grazing the tips of the blonde's as she spoke. "You're engaged, huh?"

Spencer raised an eyebrow at the bold woman in front of her. "It looks that way, doesn't it?" Her voice laced with lust and a little pain. Yeah, too bad she was with Aiden, huh?

"That's just too bad," Ashley chuckled. She leaned back away from the blonde, her fingers moving with her.

"Why's that, Miss Davies?" Spencer toyed with the class ring on her left hand as she stared intently at the brunette.

Ashley smiled. She reached out and grabbed Spencer's wrist. "Come here," she said shortly, tugging her to the employee lounge. Her eyes met those of her fellow co-workers and they got the idea.

No interruptions. No. Matter. What.

As soon as the door had closed, Ashley shoved the blonde up against said door. A grunt escaped Spencer's mouth at the contact. "What're you…"

She was cut off. By Ashley's lips nonetheless. Thrown off-guard, it took all of five seconds before Spencer realized that she should close her eyes and kiss back.

Ashley's left hand roamed Spencer's body from her head to her hips, gently caressing the exposed skin. Her right hand trailed down the blonde's left arm, stopping at her fingers. She slowly slipped her ring off, letting it thud against the floor.

Then breathing became a necessity. Spencer was the first to pull back. "Wow," she muttered. Their lips were just millimeters apart, so it was if they were still kissing.

"Yeah," Ashley mumbled, her lips trailing down the blonde's neck. Her tongue slid out and circled Spencer's pulse point, dragging her closer to the edge.

Spencer felt…weird. She had never done anything with a woman before. And Aiden…let's just say that there wasn't much happening in the bedroom other than sleeping.

Ashley's right hand made its way in between the two of them, playing with the hem of the blonde's jeans. She smiled against the woman's neck when she heard a moan escape her lips.

"Oh, Ash," Spencer breathed out. She threaded her fingers into the soft brown curls, her fingernails raking over her scalp when she felt fingers inside of her jeans.

"God, you're so wet, Spence," Ashley rasped out into the shell of the blonde's ear.

Spencer's breathing became shallow and her eyes were fighting to stay open. Or closed, not sure which one, but they were fluttering. "Please Ashley," she begged.

Ashley smiled, crashing her lips against Spencer's as she dipped a finger inside her center. She held the blonde up when she noticed her knees buckle slightly. She let her thumb brush up against the woman's clit. She chuckled, pulling her lips from Spencer's as soon as she felt her hips buck forward.

"Oh fuck," Spencer gasped. Her chest was heaving as she leaned her head onto the brunette's shoulder. She pressed her lips against her neck, sucking on the collarbone.

Ashley let out a soft moan. She lolled her head to one side so that Spencer could get better access. "You feel so good, Spence," she breathed into the blonde's ear.

Spencer pulled her head back and rested it against the door as her hips moved with the brunette's fingers. "Ash," she husked out.

"I know," Ashley muttered. She curled her fingers and felt the blonde's walls tighten around her digits. She rested her face in the crook of Spencer's neck, breathing hotly on her skin.

Spencer let out a strangled cry that vaguely resembled the brunette's name mixed with a moan. She convulsed as bright white sparks flashed against her closed eyelids. She felt every nerve in her body bursting with pleasure.

Ashley wrapped her arms around the blonde, letting her catch her breath and her land legs again. "You're so beautiful," she whispered into Spencer's ear before brushing her lips against the flushed cheeks.

"Ashley?" Spencer rasped, her breathing finally slowing down enough to speak. She looked into chocolate eyes, and she nearly fell over the brink again. "What's gonna happen now?"

The brunette shrugged her shoulders and pulled away from the taller woman. "Whatever you want to happen, I guess."

Spencer noticed the pain evident, hiding in her tone. "What would you do if I said I wanted you?"

Ashley blinked once, twice, three times before smiling. "Then you'll have to lose your boyfriend." Her smile faded, reality hitting them both.

"Yeah, I will," Spencer bent over and picked up the class ring from the floor. She turned and exited the lounge, not bothering to fix her hair or clothes.

The brunette watched as Spencer swayed her hips as she walked to where her fiancé was last seen. She stood there, waiting for the blonde to come back.

If she ever came back...


	13. A Soldier's Story

"It's so good to have you back Ash," Aiden was saying, patting her twice on the shoulder. He was a little smashed, but his loopy smile and sparkling eyes were definitely sincere.

He hadn't seen her for months and being that she was his best friend, his reaction to her return was appropriate.

Somewhat.

At least he had the good sense to put some underwear on before he went running around his frat house.

"It's good to be back, Aide," she chuckled, ruffling his hair. "Now, how many fingers am I holding up?"

"Twelve," he answered confidently, after squinting at her fist.

"Yeah, let's get you out of here and into a bed, pronto," she said, pulling him up on his unsteady feet. Luckily all her training made her the perfect companion for a drunken Aiden. She was well versed when it came to carrying heavy loads.

"Don't tell me the army took away your gayness," he said, slumped onto her right shoulder, easily swaying them back and forth as they stumbled towards the bar's exit.

"Nah, reinforced it actually. There are some assholes in the army," she said, pushing open the bar door, or trying to rather.

There was some resistance there.

Aiden gave it a half-hearted shove as well, groaning and mumbling "It's stuck," before giving up entirely.

Finally, Ashley just stepped back, allowing whoever the person was on the other side of the door entry.

And now was the beginning of the rest of her life.

A blonde woman with the bluest blue eyes she'd ever seen stumbled in, having tried using her full weight to enter the place. She thought the door was broken too.

Giving the door another odd look, the woman glanced up, startled to find both Ashley and Aiden there. Aiden grinning goofily.

"Well, how d'you do?" he slurred, tipping his head down low even as he leaned heavily on Ashley.

The woman chuckled a bit, having seen enough drunken college boys in her lifetime. "I'm doing alright," she said, amused. She turned her attention to Ashley, "I hope you're not taking advantage of him."

Ashley, taken off guard by the comment, shook her head vehemently. "Oh, no. Uh, we're, um, we're just friends," she muttered out, feeling a little flustered after, especially when the blonde just grinned at her. "I was taking him home."

"I see," she said, sweeping her gaze over Ashley's facial features as the brunette avoided her gaze. "Well, do take care of your," she met Ashley's eyes, "_friend_. I, on the other hand, have to get to work." That said, the blonde made her way over to the bar, taking residence behind the counter before slapping it loudly.

"Alright you drunks and degenerates! Who wants another round?!" she asked, to a chorus of drunken "heys" and "right heres".

Ashley just watched, entranced as the woman mingled with a few patrons, dishing out their desired drinks. It wasn't more than a few seconds but when the blonde looked up, caught her eye and winked, Ashley decided it was definitely worth the wait.

"Ew, Ash. I don't want to go into this dive again," Aiden grumbled, fully alert. "Three nights in a row is good for me. Now we need to find a new watering hole."

"You said you'd do whatever I wanted Aiden. Now, this is what I want to do so shut up," she said, annoyed with his whining.

"But you don't even drink. We just sit there while you pout into a bottled water," he grumped, jumping out of the passenger side of the vehicle.

"Whatever Aiden. Just, come on," she said, pushing open the bar door and freezing, both literally and figuratively. Literally, because it was kind of cold in the place, and figuratively because her brain just turned to mush and stopped functioning, so the signal to walk being fired off from her brain never quite reached her legs.

Of course, the whole thing happened unexpectedly so Aiden just crashed right into her.

"Nice going Aiden," she grumbled, from flat on her back. Usually, her good coordination would have saved her, but, if you remember, yeah, temporary brain damage.

"It's not my fault. You just stopped walking," he said, helping her up.

"Yeah, yeah," Ashley grumbled, wiping off her ass and turning around to be face to face with the blonde woman from before. Her eyes grew wide.

The blonde smirked; peeking behind at Ashley's stilled hands, which were still on her ass. "You missed a spot," she said, raising a coy eyebrow.

Ashley swallowed. "Uh, thanks."

The blonde nodded. "No problem."

Aiden looked amused. "Hi. I'm Aiden. This non-speaking clumsy being next to me is Ashley."

Ashley blushed something furious before grounding her eyes, only to look up again at the blonde's unfettered laugh. "Non-speaking and clumsy? What a combo," she commented amusedly, before sticking out her hand in greeting. "I'm Spencer, by the way. And I come in peace," she said, shaking first his hand, then Ashley's. "I saw you guys the other night actually," she continued, still watching Ashley for her reaction.

"Oh yeah," Aiden said, catching Spencer's eye and shrugging when she seemed to ask him what was up with Ashley. "I must've been smashed or something because I don't remember." He subtly pointed to the bathroom and she approved with her eyes.

"Yeah, you were pretty hammered,"

"Well, I gotta pee," he said, not seeing a more appropriate way to bring it up.

"Aiden," Ashley admonished.

"What?"

"Nothing," she mumbled, watching him go.

"I'll be back. Just, talk and stuff," he said sending a wink her way, making her flush slightly again.

"I'm…sorry. About him," she said, running a hand through her curly hair. "He's weird sometimes."

"Nonsense. I'm glad he's gone actually," Spencer said, trailing a finger down Ashley's arm.

"You are?"

"Yeah. I can talk to you now," the blonde woman said, pulling Ashley out of the bar, and quickly, into her car.

"So tell me something interesting about you," Spencer said, tucking her legs beneath her as she leaned into her seat, facing Ashley directly.

"Well, I'm in the army," Ashley started, picking at a lose string on her jeans. "Captain actually. And, I just got back from my second tour in Iraq."

"Wow," Spencer said, completely enthralled. "My brother was in the army."

"Oh yeah," Ashley's eyes lit up. "When did he finish serving?"

"Um, last November. He died…during combat," Spencer admitted, looking away slightly.

"I'm sorry," Ashley said, worried about her misstep.

"It's fine. I'm good now. So, you're a Captain, huh? Must be nice,"

"It's cool. I just like the whole structure the army provides. A lot of people think it's rigid. But I find comfort in its rigidity,"

"Wild child?" Spencer asked, grinning broadly.

"The wildest," Ashley said, chuckling a bit with the other woman. "I was pretty bad."

"The army tamed the beast within,"

"Just gave me something to do," Ashley answered, with a shrug.

"So, how does the whole gay thing fit into the picture?" Spencer asked, fixing her gaze on Ashley, placing a hand on the other woman's knee.

Ashley swallowed. "Gay thing?"

"You are gay, right?"

Ashley nodded.

"Well, last time I checked, gays weren't allowed in the military,"

"Last time I checked I wasn't announcing my gayness to anybody," Ashley said, a bit harsher than she meant to. Spencer removed her hand. "I'm sorry. That…that whole thing. It just…pisses me off."

"You and me both," Spencer said quietly, nodding gently. They both grew quiet.

"Can I tell you something?" Spencer asked suddenly, drawing Ashley's gaze to her.

"Anything," Ashley told her, surprised when Spencer surged forward and pressed their lips together.

The blonde pulled back painfully slow, smiling as she watched Ashley struggle to open her eyes.

"Interesting," the brunette said, eyes still closed. "I'd like to reply to that."

"Go ahead," Spencer said, grinning broader as Ashley blindly leaned back in, finding her lips easily. Their kiss was not so chaste this time, and soon Ashley found herself groaning as Spencer straddled her in her car, lips, teeth, and tongue working together to make her absolutely crazy.

And she was…going a little crazy, that is.

Until…

Bam! Bam! Bam!

Spencer pulled back with a quickness, glancing out of her passenger door window to find Ashley's friend Aiden smiling goofily and flashing them the thumbs up sign. "Your friend is annoying," she told Ashley, smiling nonetheless. "You wanna ditch him?" she asked her, sliding back into her own seat.

"He'll never forgive me," Ashley said, finally regulating her breathing enough to do so.

Spencer merely shrugged. "It's your call."

"What did you have in mind?"

Spencer pressed Ashley up against the side of her car. She was going to make it to her house, to her bed and make it even more incredible for Ashley. But…that didn't work out so well.

Ashley swallowed hard and then released a shuddering breath in Spencer's ear, her fingers raking the blonde's exposed shoulders as said blonde gently bit at her neck. "Sp-Spence. Not…God, not here."

"What?" Spencer questioned innocently. She pulled back and admired her work - a bright red mark on the left side of Ashley's neck - if only for a second before she was pulling the brunette into her house and onto the couch. It was the closest thing she could…finish.

Ashley landed with an 'oomph'. "Spence…" She was going to ask what she was doing, but she didn't have time. Spencer had already captured her lips in a fevered kiss, her hands raking over the brunette's body in a rushed manner. Ashley wasn't complaining though, the things Spencer was doing to her were amazing.

Before Ashley knew it, Spencer had removed her top and told her to lift up from the couch. She complied, of course, in hopes that she could get Spencer down to no clothes as well. And she did. She took the time Spencer was admiring her toned body to pull her collared shirt over her head. But as she reached for her jeans, Spencer had pushed her back on the couch, attacking her lips, neck, ear, chest, any visible skin was fair game.

"Ash?" Spencer breathed out into the brunette's ear. She received a low moan in return. She stopped her hands from moving down the defined abs beneath her as she pulled up, straddling her waist.

Ashley's hands gripped Spencer's hips, grazing her fingernails above her jeans. She trailed them to the buttons and undid them. She tried to pull them off, but Spencer didn't budge. "Spencer…" She raised an eyebrow at the motionless blonde above her.

Spencer shook her head, her thoughts leaving her head when she realized warm hands brushing against skin only a few had touched before. She lifted up, allowing Ashley to remove her pants, before straddling her waist again. "Ash, I gotta—"

"Shut up and kiss me," Ashley demanded in her husky voice. And Spencer did. She kissed her hard, soft, fast, slow, all ways imaginable as her fingers danced down the brunette's body, eventually landing at valley where her legs met her hips.

"Ash, you…" Spencer wanted to ask if she was sure, but a surge of confidence flowed through her body again and she didn't think twice about whether or not Ashley wanted this. She was sure, and by the look of the brunette's darkened eyes and twitching body, she knew Ashley was sure.

Spencer let her fingers dip down into Ashley's folds, just exploring for now, testing the waters, memorizing every little detail of the woman beneath her. She swallowed hard when Ashley hissed in her ear. She was going to go slow, build up to a powerful climax for the brunette, but she soon found out how wrong she would be.

Ashley's hips rose from the couch into Spencer's hand to relieve some of her ache. "Spencer, please."

Spencer nodded slowly, her lips caressing Ashley's neck as she slipped a finger inside the woman's entrance, reveling in how good it felt to be inside her. "God, Ash. You feel…"

She was cut off by Ashley's lips on her own, thin, slender fingers inside her hair, making the kiss needy and deep. Her pace was slowly going faster by the minute, teasing Ashley a little. She'd bring her to the edge then slow down enough to keep her from falling over.

"Spence, please. God, don't tease," Ashley panted, her breath mixing with Spencer's as she pulled away from their kiss.

And Spencer complied. She curled her fingers against Ashley's walls. She brought her lips to Ashley's neck to suck on the right side gently, throwing her even more over the edge.

Ashley's body stiffened while her hips pressed into Spencer's hand. Her breath hitched, pausing for a second before coming out all at once, screaming the blonde's name. It mingled with Spencer's heavy pants against her neck.

Spencer rested on top of Ashley, equally spent as the brunette. "Ashley, you have to promise me you won't."

"Won't what?" Ashley asked, completely out of breath.

"Fall in love with me."

Ashley nodded her head slowly, "Okay."

A few weeks later, the women were nearly inseparable; talking for hours about anything that struck their fancy. Spencer, it turned out, was a full-time college student who chose to work at the bar from time to time for a little extra money. It also turned out that they had a lot of things in common, including an infatuation with paintball and Family Guy.

It also turned out that both women were incredibly insatiable, and as much as they could talk for hours they could also make love. Perfection never had a better definition. That is, until one morning, a heavy discussion treaded into an otherwise perfect morning afterglow.

"You look hot in that," Ashley commented, while she smoked a cigarette.

She was sitting near her window, wearing a tank top and some underwear, watching Spencer model her captain's hat and nothing else, tangled up in crisp and slightly damp bed sheets.

"You're too far away," the blonde commented, smiling as Ashley flicked the cigarette out of the window and gradually slid up the bed to meet her.

"Better?" the brunette asked, hovering above the other woman, smiling when Spencer kissed her lips gently.

"Much better," Spencer mumbled into the kiss, getting lost in the sensation. "When do you have to go back?" she asked Ashley, quite unexpectedly.

"Back where?" Ashley asked, confused. She forgot the meaning of words when hot naked blonde women kissed her.

"To the army,"

"Don't worry about it," Ashley said, leaning back in but Spencer pushed her away.

"Tell me," she implored, searching the other woman's eyes for the answer.

"A month. In a little under a month," Ashley replied, finally, sighing when Spencer moved away.

The blonde sat up, swinging her legs out of the bed while Ashley looked on, staring at her back.

"Do you have to go back?"

Her silence was her answer.

"I'm gonna go then," Spencer said, finding her jeans and shirt, throwing them on hurriedly.

"You don't have to," Ashley told her, not moving to stop her though.

"I think I do."

The next night Ashley was waiting for Spencer when she turned up for work, holding a single rose in her grasp.

"For you," she said, offering it to the other woman with a smile.

Spencer did not smile back. "What are you doing here?" she asked, sounding weary.

"I wanted to see you,"

"Why?"

"Why?" Ashley was confused.

"Yes why? Why bother Ashley?" the blonde said, pushing through the patrons to get to the bar. "We both know that this is going nowhere and I'd rather check out sooner than later."

"Who says this is going nowhere?"

"You're in the army. You're shipping out in less than a month. Do I have to spell it out for you?"

"I guess so, because I don't get what that has to do with us spending time together,"

"You mean fucking," Spencer deadpanned, loud enough to get the attention of a few guys.

"No, that's not what I mean," Ashley hissed, grabbing the woman's arm so that maybe she'd slow down long enough to listen. And long enough for Ashley to formulate some coherent thoughts. "I have the best time with you, Spencer. The sex, I love it. But, that's not all it's about. You _know_ that."

Spencer looked sad. "I do. That's why I can't do this," she said, wiggling out of Ashley's grasp and busying herself with a few of the patrons at the far end of the bar.

Ashley left shortly after, realizing Spencer wasn't going to talk to her. Her rose abandoned on the counter.

Wiped out, Spencer pushed open the bar door, walking out into the night air, surprised to find Ashley waiting there for her.

"I'm too tired to do this,"

"Just let me walk you to your car," Ashley said, holding up her hands. "It's dangerous."

"Who's gonna walk you to yours?" Spencer asked, folding her arms across her chest.

"I can manage," Ashley assured her, walking slowly.

They didn't say much, until they reached Spencer's car. Ashley held her door open for her, closing it behind Spencer once she'd gotten in. "Thank you," Spencer said, lingering for just a second as the car stalled. She wouldn't meet Ashley's eyes. "I guess this is goodbye."

"Wait," Ashley said, placing her hands on the open car window. "You can't go. I've got to tell you something."

"Don't. Please don't Ashley," Spencer pleaded, her eyes taking on a clear blue, watery.

But Ashley didn't listen, forged on. "I think I could be in love with you. I think I am actually," she said, her voice wavering.

Spencer lowered her head to the steering wheel, eyes closed. "I asked you not to."

"I can't help it. It's crazy I know but you…you're just perfect, you know?" she said, a little laugh thrown in there, amidst the emotion. "And I love you. I really do."

"Ashley,"

"And I know you care about me too Spencer. You have to. I feel it,"

"Ash,"

"We can try,"

"I can't," Spencer said, her voice breaking on both syllables.

"Why?" Ashley pleaded, her eyes watery too.

"I don't want to lose you,"

"You won't,"

"I don't want you to die Ashley!"

The words shook them both. Their delivery only made it that much more palpable.

"I can't…I wouldn't know what to do if that happened,"

"It won't happen,"

"You don't know that," Spencer said, crying freely now.

"I promise you, that I will come back to you," Ashley said, taking the girl's hand off the steering wheel and pressing it to her rapidly beating heart. "I promise."

"You can't break it,"

"I won't,"

They could have been talking about the promise or Spencer's heart. In all honesty, it was probably both.

"You have to write me," Spencer said, hugging her tightly as they stood outside the car.

They parked a few blocks away just so they could have their privacy.

"I will. Every day," Ashley reassured her, squeezing her incredibly tight. "I love you."

"I love you," Spencer whispered, directly into her ear. Reluctantly, she pulled away, kissing her gently on the cheek and then smearing away the residual lipstick with her thumb.

"Be safe," she said. "Careful."

"I will," Ashley said, cupping her cheek gently. "I'll be back Spence. I promise you."

"You'd better make it home to me."

_A cold day, rainy, mid-November,_

_Spencer stood under a black umbrella, hair whipping in the wind. _

_The casket was carried out by fully adorned soldiers, flag draped over it. _

_Two soldiers carefully folded the cloth with precision, one presenting it to Spencer._

_She leaned down to press a gentle kiss to the wooden casket, whispering a final goodbye to her brother. _

It was almost a year ago to the day and the circumstances were eerily similar.

It was raining and cold and Spencer was standing under an umbrella. Only this time, the people leaving the plane were living, and hurriedly rushed out to their loved ones, glad to see them after such an extended absence.

She watched them with a hidden smile, knowing that in a short while she'd experience the same kind of joy. And when Ashley stepped off the plane, catching her eye immediately, Spencer cast the umbrella aside, no longer concerned about the rain.

Her soldier had just come home.


	14. Compliments to the Chef

And now I'm back to where I started.

My name is Matthew Davies and I am in a loveless marriage.

Guess I should explain.

I really should have seen it coming. The signs were there from the very beginning. You see, I met Ashley when we were in high school and fell straight away. She was beautiful, talented, intelligent, and just plain perfect. So when I first saw her seated by the bleachers, looking a little out of place to say the least, I just had to know her.

Had to be with her.

It took her a little longer to return the sentiments obviously but after months of dogged pursuit she finally caved in.

And who wouldn't. I was a pretty descent looking guy, with the three P's: popularity, power, and a protracted trust fund of about 40 million dollars. So, she wasn't exactly scraping the bottom of the barrel with me.

Still, even though we were together, it felt as though Ashley was never really into it…us. Sure, we did all the things a boyfriend and girlfriend should, but while I always went the extra mile for her, she'd only sprint towards the finish line for me if I was looking.

As soon as I'd turn my head, she'd stop running.

I actually didn't think our relationship would survive high school, but it did. And, much to my surprise, she accepted my proposal at our graduation party.

I don't know why I even asked her, aside from the fact that I was head over heels in love with her. I mean, with all the foreboding I had going on, I should've known better.

Meh, call me a glutton for punishment then.

I decided to go to school in New York, and she followed. With me being 18, and having access to the trust money, it made for a comfortable living, there was nothing she wanted, needed, desired that she couldn't have.

Well, except a child.

We tried very early off but it wasn't working. There was some biological bullshit explanation the Doctor gave us but I didn't appreciate some uptight bastard telling me my cock was inactive.

Anyway, it wasn't too long after that that I realized she was only ever having sex with me to get pregnant. When we found out that we couldn't make babies together…anything having to do with the bedroom was kaput.

No sex.

No mention of sex.

The idea of doing anything in the bedroom had become downright ludicrous.

And, that had to change…

"_Hey baby," Matt said, breezing into the apartment door. He tossed his suit jacket onto a chair only to have Ashley sigh heavily and pick the garment up to hang it on a hook._

"_I would have hung it up Ashley,"_

"_Then why didn't you?" the brunette fumed, angrily pushing past him._

"_I'm kind of in a hurry," he said, smiling brightly as he discarded his briefcase. "I know you're always telling me that we never go anywhere," he started, rolling his eyes slightly. That whole statement was entirely false. They always went places. Ashley just never enjoyed them. "So, I, your amazingly brilliant husband, got us a reservation for two at that new restaurant you've been wanting to try out," he concluded, looking to her expectantly._

"_That's great Matthew," Ashley said, haltingly. "It would be even better if I hadn't already started dinner," she finished, heading off toward to kitchen to show him the cooking homemade soup._

"_Oh," Matthew replied, lamely, and then brightened. "Aw, come on babe. It'll be fun and we can eat your cooking anytime. According to Brady, having a meal cooked at this restaurant is just like being at the old country."_

"_What would you know about the old country?" Ashley deadpanned. "You're German."_

"_All the more reason to go," he said, wrapping his arms around her as she tried to groan her way away. "Ashley," he mumbled against her neck. "Pookie," he mumbled into her ear with a pout and she couldn't help but chuckle along with him. "Come out with me tonight. I want you to have a good time."_

She agreed to come with me.

But that was just the beginning…

"_What did I tell you?" he whispered to her excitedly. Glad that she was enjoying herself. And she was._

_Then again his baby always had a weakness for Italian._

"_Yeah, you were right," Ashley said, finishing off the rest of her lamb. "This meal was divine."_

"_Even if it reminds you of Ma from Babe,"_

"_Aww, Matt," she grumbled, tossing a hand at him playfully. "Why'd you remind me?"_

"_I'm a deviant,"_

"_This was really good though," Ashley hedged, knowing he'd pick up on what she was tentatively asking. _

"_Should we…pay our compliments to the chef?" he asked her, getting his answer in the form of a grin. Matthew flagged down a waiter. _

"_We'd like to see the chef kind Sir," he requested in his bestest formal voice._

"_Was something not to your liking Sir?" the Maitre 'D replied._

"_No, everything was perfect," Matthew said, turning up the schmooze. "That's why we want to see the chef."_

"_Okay, she'll be out in one moment Sir…"_

Ashley held my hand while we waited.

It was the last time she held my hand.

_They hadn't been waiting too long when someone approached their table. She was dressed simply, a black shirt and neatly pressed slacks. Her long blonde hair pulled expertly to the back. She wore a simple gold bracelet on her left wrist, and her eyes shone like molten sapphires._

"_Sir, Madam," the Maitre 'D said, clearing his throat. "Chef Carlin," he finished with the brief introduction._

"_Hello," the woman spoke, and her voice held a mixture of all around pleasantness and a taste of quiet amusement._

_The combination of both gave her voice a sultry quality._

"_Hi, Chef Carlin. My wife and I just wanted to tell you that this meal…it was mind-blowing," Matthew gushed, moving his hands about dramatically._

_Ashley didn't move._

_She couldn't._

_She could only stare at the woman who'd appeared just moments ago._

"_Why thank you," Chef Carlin said, tucking a non-existent lock behind her ear as she smiled at them. Her eyes suddenly moved to connect with Ashley's. "Mind-blowing huh?" she asked, winking briefly at the brunette, before turning back to the husband._

_Of course the exchange went unnoticed by Matthew, oblivious to most things really. "Absolutely. I think we'll be dining out more often."_

"_I'm glad that you'll be," the woman's eyes darted to Ashley's. "…eating out more often. I guess I'll be seeing you around then."_

"_Trust me, Chef Carlin. You most definitely will. Right, Ashley?" Matthew questioned his still mute wife. _

_She quickly recovered though. "Yeah, we'll be seeing Chef Carlin around," she answered, rushing all the words out on one breath._

"_Call me Spencer," the blonde said, and left before either Davies could say anything else._

"_Wow, she's…she's amazing," Matthew said, shaking his head at the cool confidence the blonde seemed to exude. He turned to his wife, who was, (surprise) still in a daze. "Ash?"_

"_Yeah?"_

"_Isn't she amazing?"_

"_Yeah," Ashley whispered, catching one last glimpse of the blonde before she disappeared into the restaurant's kitchen. "Amazing."_

Pretty much sealed my own fate right there.

I guess I got a little thick-headed or I just liked seeing her happy because I took her back to that place more times than I could count those following three months. After the first couple of weeks she and Spencer had developed a fast-friendship and I was glad for her. She didn't have that many friends in town, especially people her age. It was good for her to have someone to talk to, to hang out with…I just didn't intend for the rest of it to happen.

"_For the love of God Ashley, I'm your husband for Christ's sake. You're married to me (A/N: tee hee, I'm sorry)," Matthew yelled, infuriated. He'd blown off a rather important client to spend some time with Ashley. But she had other plans._

_Normally he wouldn't have minded because that's the kind of trusting, albeit naïve, man he was, but today was kind of important._

_Only she didn't know that._

"_God, what's the big deal Matt? We can hang out any other time,"_

"_It's our anniversary," he spat out, not believing he actually had to say it._

_Her eyes widened in shock. "Oh my God, Matthew I completely spaced out," she said, moving closer to him. "I'm sorry. I'll call Spencer and cancel straight-away," she said, wrapping him in a tight embrace._

_He smiled into her shoulder at the gesture, shaking his head gently. "No, you shouldn't. Go on and go out," he told her, not wanting to take anything away from her. "We'll do something later on in the week."_

"_God Matt, I am so sorry," she told him mournfully. She was truly sorry, but secretly elated she had the green light to go with Spencer. She pressed her mouth closer to his ear before whispering, "Maybe, when Spencer and I go shopping, I'll pick up something extra special for you."_

"_Mmm," he moaned, holding her tighter. "A new lunchbox?"_

_Her chuckle sounded nice and clear. "You bet your ass," she said, pulling away. "I gotta go though babe, or I'm gonna be late."_

"_Go ahead," he waved her off. "Call me when you're on your way home and remember, don't do anything I wouldn't do." _

And, technically, she didn't.

I mean, I would totally, if given the opportunity, sleep with Spencer.

But I'm not supposed to know that yet.

Nope, that didn't dawn on me until…

_How wrong is it to be left out of a three-way?_

_I mean, I'm in the room and everything, but the action's over there and I'm…over here._

_I guess I could loo- oh. Nope, definitely not doing that again._

_I must say this though. These girls are pretty much naturals at what they're doing._

_I guess it's true. Women do know other women._

_You're probably wondering how I ended up in this pickle, and if you're not…tough, because I'm divulging anyway._

_Well, Ashley and I have been a bit…how should I say it…hmm? Chill. Yeah, chill sounds good._

_So, anyway, Ashley and I have been a bit chill in the sex department. It's not that we never have it, we just …okay, I'm lying. We NEVER have it._

_It got so bad I asked ole Brady from work what to do. He said, that when he and his misses were having a little trouble…*clears throat* and I quote "sweeping out the chimney" he got this sex book, by some sex expert._

_So I checked it out, and ran a couple of the ideas by Ashley. Male subjugation, female domination, three-ways- That's as far as I got._

_So, we settled on that option, and decided to add another girl to the mix. _

_I was pleasantly surprised mind you, because my wife is the kind of woman who blushes watching Skinemax, still, she knew the perfect candidate for the job._

_Her new BFF: Spencer Carlin._

_I didn't think the blonde would adhere to it, at all. But she did, eagerly. So, now I was stuck with two closet-freaks and me._

_That's where we are presently._

_Only the "and me" is like: two closet-freaks……………………………………………and me._

_I mean, the blonde one keeps kicking me if I come near her and Ashley's way into her._

_She never kisses me like that._

_She never touches me like that._

_And I'm pretty sure she's never screamed, quite like that._

_I didn't even last until her first orgasm._

_I had to get out of there._

_It was becoming painfully obvious that I wasn't what she needed._

_Wasn't what she wanted._

As you might have suspected, things got pretty odd after that.

I couldn't even bring myself to look at her sometimes and I know what you're thinking, I shouldn't have been mean to her. You're like, in the back of your mind you knew. Even back in high school, you knew.

And I did.

I knew she didn't want me.

But now I knew she wanted somebody else.

And that hurt.

Still, I made it easy on her. I told her I knew.

I told her that while I'll always be there for her, I wasn't going to let her continue to deny who she was.

I told her that everything would be alright, and then I wished her the best when she finally, reluctantly, walked out of my life.

Not before telling me that I was her best friend though.

That still makes me smile.

I'll let her tell you the rest because, well, she lived it.

_I've never felt as exhilarated, happy, nervous, anxious, contented, nervous, elated, euphoric, jubilant, and oh yeah, nervous as I feel right now._

_My faux marriage is coming to an end and now I'm off ready to profess my love to another…a woman at that._

_I don't really know if I'm making the right decision. Life with Matt had become so comfortable to me. Almost like having a second skin, a security blanket. I wasn't lying when I said he was my best friend._

_But now I was walking across a tight-rope, racing toward the other end, an unknown. And there was no safety net below me._

_If I fell…it was gonna hurt._

_It was a risk worth taking, because no one has ever made me feel the things Spencer has. And I don't just mean physically either._

_She can read we like a well-worn book._

_She knows me cover to cover, including the summaries on the back and inside cover._

_So this just has to be real. It has to be._

_I'm at her apartment now, having walked here faster than I have any time before. I reach her door and knock hurriedly, feeling like I might need to throw up._

_She opens the door, and, while her eyes light up in delight, her face falls just a second after._

_I'm crying._

"_Ashley, baby, what's wrong?" she asks me. She tugs me closer to her, into her arms and into the apartment._

_I wish I could stop sobbing._

"_M-mmatt," I stammer out through my tears, and I feel her go rigid. _

"_Did he find out?" she asks me, her voice taking on a stony quality. "Did he do something to you?"_

_I shake my head against her chest, clinging tighter trying to calm myself. It's her erratic heartbeat that finally does it for me. _

_I don't want her to be worried._

_I pull back, my words ready._

_I hope they're the right ones._

"_He- he knows, about us." She starts to interrupt and I just shake my head. "He's not mad, exactly. In fact, he sent me here," I say, with a little chuckle. Her jaw just dropped. "I know," I tell her. "I can hardly believe it either." This is the hard part, and I take her hand as I say this. "I need to stop running from myself. I need to stop running from what my heart is trying to tell me."_

_Spencer takes a slow yet deliberate step forward. We've been this close many times, and usually there's a smirk on her face, her lips prepared to either say something to make my cheeks turn red or meld with mine._

_There's no smirk this time though. In fact, she's wearing a slight frown. I know that look. It's the one of hopeful yet measured elation._

_She says it's what I looked like before she kissed me for the first time._

"_What is your heart trying to tell you?" she asks me, so quiet it's almost a whisper. She sounds so vulnerable._

_I know I have the right words now._

"_That I'm in love with you," I whisper, but it echoes around us._

_She basks in it…_

_For all of three seconds, before lifting me off the ground in a firm embrace, her lips pressed tightly against mine in a kiss that isn't hectic, isn't frantic or needy, it's just…perfect. _

_At long last she puts me down, her blue eyes sparkling back at me. "I'm in love with you too, Ashley Davies," she whispers, and I kiss her again, softly. "Let me show you," she tells me before picking me up and carrying me into her bedroom._

_And she did._


	15. I Saved Your, Um, Cat

A/N: Avert your eyes kiddies. This one is for the adults.

---

I'm late.

I'm late.

Ashley thought, rushing through the quad.

_For a very important date._

She internally groaned.

_Shut up, subconscious._

This was not the time to be joking, or even pretend to be joking; she had to get to class on time. It was Wednesday, lecture day, and…well, come to think of it, why was she going to class again?

Ashley slowed her gait and decided that maybe a Starbucks run was in order this morning, Criminal Psychology be damned.

Her mouth was all tuned up for one of those amazing muffins and white hot chocolate when a pain infused voice hit her ears.

Normally, she would've continued walking. But it would seem that Superwoman Ashley Davies' kryptonite is a crying girl.

Or woman.

Take your pick.

She hurriedly jogged over to the blonde who was staring up distraughtly into a tree, her blue eyes watery.

Ashley kinda swooned on sight.

"You okay?"

"No," the blonde shot back, her lip trembling. "Do I look okay?"

_Uh, no. Sad, definitely. Crazy? Maybe. But definitely not okay._

Not wanting to set her off Ashley offered a timid, "No?"

"Is that a question?" the blonde asked confused, and Ashley smiled, invading a little personal space. Befuddled blonde girl was cute.

"No, but this is. Why is such a beautiful woman standing out here looking very sad?" she asked, her fingers brushing along the blonde's arm.

Her lip gave a cute little tremble again before she pointed up into the tree. "My Pussy's stuck in the tree."

_Come again._

Ashley's eyes couldn't've gotten any wider.

Did that girl just really say that? I mean, it's highly plausible given that she's crying and everything but I wonder if it's a euphemism for-

"And I can't get her because I'm afraid of heights and I'm not a monkey so I don't climb trees," the woman continued, oblivious to Ashley's current state of near hysteria. "Can you get my Pussy please?" she asked, pouting slightly.

_Well, yeah._

Ashley couldn't help it anymore. She giggled so furiously she was sure she'd die of oxygen deprivation any time now.

The blonde sighed. "Why does everyone keep laughing when I ask them that?"

"I have no idea," the brunette managed between giggles, calming down once she'd seen how very unfunny the blonde was finding things. "Look, I can go get him-"

"Her." The mystery woman corrected.

"Her," Ashley amended, "for you. It might be better if I knew her name though. So that she'd come to me."

"Pussy,"

"Excuse me?"

"Pussy,"

"That's her name?"

"Yes,"

"You named your cat Pussy?"

"Well, it's not _my _cat exactly. It's my roommate's, but yeah, her name is Pussy Cat,"

"That's kinda…" _weird, funny, hot._ "Cute," Ashley said, scrunching up her nose.

"Thanks," the blonde said, flashing her a quick smile. "Now could you, please, _please_, get her down for me?"

-----------

**A couple of minutes later…**

"Meeeeeeoowwwrn!"

That's Pussy.

She just took a swipe at Ashley.

Correction:

She just took another swipe at Ashley.

_God, this lady has one hostile Pussy._

Ashley burst out into snickers.

There is no way one's subconscious could be so hilarious.

"Lady!" she called down, still perched precariously on a rather non-sturdy branch. "Your cat keeps trying to scratch the shit outta me."

"Can you please get her down for me? My roommate's gonna kill me,"

Ashley sighed, her hands being tied. Cute girls sweetly asking her to do things is kinda kryptonite-ish too.

She reached for the cat one more time, the animal arching its back in fright dangerously, before animatedly and quickly dashing to another branch. The movement and it's nearer proximity to her made her reach out for it, grabbing Pussy before she could retreat again.

But she had to do so with two hands.

Now, who was keeping Ashley stabilized on the branch?

You guessed it.

No one.

"AHHHHH!!!"

THUD!

-----------

When she came to, the blonde woman was crouched over her, eyes worried, but Pussy tucked securely in her arms.

"How many fingers am I holding up?" she asked the fallen brunette, holding up three.

_Just the right amount,_ Ashley thought, and then cursed her mind for even going there right now.

Now, when she had a killer headache and wasn't entirely sure whether she could still move everything.

"What happened?" she asked the woman, groggily.

"You fell," the blonde deadpanned, and upon Ashley's withered look she continued. "You fell, but luckily you fell through some of the brush and it slowed your fall. Plus, you kinda landed on me."

Ashley smiled unwittingly. _I bet girls are always falling for her._

"So, now that you've procured my Pussy, how can I re-pay you?" the woman asked, helping Ashley to her feet.

"I can think of a few things," the brunette drawled.

…

But Scrabble wasn't one of 'em.

What the hell was the matter with this girl? Does she or does she not recognize hotness when she sees it? Ashley wondered, amazed at how distant the woman was still being.

She'd brought Ashley back to her place for the pretentious reason of giving her the best cup of cocoa she could imagine, but when they got here she gave Ashley…okay, it was the best cup of cocoa she could imagine, but she thought that was a ruse.

_Thought wrong Romeo. _

_This woman was as straight as red-neck Republican in a men's restroom._

_Oops. My bad._

Pussy had taken a liking to her though. Good thing too, because it seemed that was all the pussy she'd be getting today.

"Hey," Ashley said, getting the blonde's attention. "Thanks for the cocoa and stuff, but I think I'm gonna head out. My arm kinda hurts because I think I scratched it, and it's getting kinda late," _...and you're boring as hell_.

"Are you sure you can't stay a little while longer?" the woman said, poking her head out from the kitchen. "My roommate should be getting back soon and she's pre-med so she'd be able to fix you right up."

"As…tempting as that offer sounds, I think I'm gonna-"

"FUCK!"

The loud exclamation stopped her dead in her tracks and speech.

She barely had a chance to look to the door when another blonde came bustling into the living area, throwing about her coat, and a book bag, and a faulty umbrella.

Now _she_ was cute.

"Oh my God, Darcy. I hate the weatherman and…" she glanced at the umbrella, "the rain totes people."

Ashley giggled a little which caused the woman to look in her direction. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know we had company."

"Yes, we do," Darcy said, rounding the corner, cocoa in hand. She handed the mug to the blonde. "This is Ashley Davies, Pussy Rescuer. And Ashley, this is my roommate, cousin, and lesbian, Spencer Carlin. And in case you didn't catch that…" Darcy lowered her voice to a very loud whisper, pointing discreetly (but _so_ not) towards Spencer. "She likes girls."

Ashley and Spencer both gaped at her in shock. Could she _be_ any more obvious?

"Well, alrighty then. Guess I'll be taking my leave now. You two have a lot to…_discuss_," Darcy said, with a smirk, heading for the apartment door. "See ya tomorrow Spence. And I'm sure I'll be seeing you around Ashley."

Spencer, still standing, turned away from the door to a very "deer-caught-in-headlights" Ashley.

Instantly though, the shock gave way to something else.

Spencer raised an eyebrow. "Pussy rescuer?"

"I saved the cat," Ashley answered the ridiculous question. "Lesbian?"

Spencer blushed, her eyes finding the floor for a moment, before finding her confidence again. "I like women."

"I see," Ashley said, her eyes meeting Spencer's.

"That a problem?" Spencer asked, taking a tentative step forward.

_Snort. As if._

Ashley smirked, standing and moving closer to the blonde. "No," she said, pressing closer. "No, that's not a problem at all."

-----------

Spencer had Ashley pressed up against her door, closed door, to her room. The blonde's hands raking every inch of the woman in front of her with incessant need. Their lips meshing together in an intimate kiss.

Then reality sank in for Spencer. She was about to fuck a stranger.

A smoking hot stranger, but a stranger nonetheless.

So she slowed things down a bit. Her fingers threading into the brunette curls in front of her as she softened this kiss.

Ashley finally caught on.

Both girls walked toward the bed, Spencer leading of course, but their lips never parted as Ashley leaned her down onto the bed.

_She's a bottom. Score!_

Tentatively, both girls removed the other's shirts at nearly the same time, throwing them in different directions. They landed in a soft thud.

Not like the women heard it. Their lips too busy mingling with the other's in a frenzied kiss.

Soon the rest of their clothes formed a puddle on each side of the bed.

Ashley swallowed hard as she gazed down at the blonde woman beneath her. That beautiful body, _which would make a God jealous_, those darkened blue eyes, _that could make the sea seem like a… light_, and her wonderful golden hair, _that…something or other…reminds me of wheat._

Seems as though even Ashley's witty subconscious is KO'ed by the hotness that is Spencer Carlin.

Yessir.

Spencer sensed Ashley's nervousness, bringing her hand up to the back of the brunette's neck, playing with the tendrils of hair as she pulled her down for a soft kiss.

Ashley's fingers trailed up and down the blonde's sides, feeling the goose bumps rise as she moved each finger. She smiled when her hands halted on the taller woman's hips and the aforementioned hips rose slightly, wanting more contact.

_So, she is a mover, huh? This'll be fun._

"Ash," Spencer hissed, pulling back from the kiss long enough to catch her breath. She watched the brunette smirk, her fingers inching dangerously close to her center.

The brunette's smirk widened, her eyes barely catching the piercing blue ones as she ducked down and pressed her lips against the other woman's neck. Her breath caressed the blonde's exposed skin in the form of a chuckle.

She let her fingers trail up the thigh of the woman beneath her, reveling in the cries escaping the perfect cherry lips she's claimed as her own.

"Please, Ashley." Spencer groaned. Her lower body had a mind of its own because it was lurching forward to hopefully get more contact with Ashley's fingers. She watched as the smaller woman's eyes darken immediately at her actions.

The blonde's eyes rolled into the back of her head when Ashley pressed two fingers inside of her body. She let out a long hiss of approval when the brunette fed her needs. Well, one of them. The other was to…wait. That one's being fulfilled too.

Ashley leaned down and captured Spencer's lip in a passionate lip lock. Yup. Just what Spencer needed.

Strangled cries of pleasure seeped out of Spencer's now free mouth when Ashley pressed her thumb against her clit, bringing her closer to the edge than ever before. "So…Ash…"

"I know." Ashley whispered into the shell of the blonde's ear. She felt Spencer's walls tighten. She wrapped her mouth around the taller woman's earlobe, sucking on it gently as she brought the woman to the edge, but not letting her fall over just yet.

"Oh god. Please Ashley," Spencer begged, her fingers woven into the raven hair of the girl on top of her. Her hips were rising and falling to match Ashley's movements inside of her.

Ashley nodded. She trailed her lips down Spencer's neck, sucking hard on her collarbone as she pressed her fingers against the blonde's spots.

Spencer's eyes rolled back even farther. She watched fireworks explode on her eyelids as her body convulsed, riding out her orgasm for as long as Ashley would allow.

The brunette smiled against Spencer's scorching skin, slowing her movements a little more each second. As soon as she withdrew her fingers, she licked them clean before resting her head on the blonde's pillow above them. She motioned for Spencer to come up by her.

Shakily, Spencer crawled up to Ashley. She let her head rest on the brunette's shoulder, her right leg settled in between Ashley's and her right arm draped around her stomach. "That was…"

"Amazing? Hot? Unbelievably, amazingly hot?" Ashley joked, her arms resting around the blonde's body, protectively.

Spencer chuckled. "No. Well, yes. I was gonna go with…different."

Ashley pressed her lips to the top of the blonde's head. "Whatcha mean?"

"I don't know. It just was." Spencer shrugged. Her lips pressing against the brunette's neck, sending shivers down both bodies. Her eyelids were fluttering closed and her breathing leveled out.

"Spence?" Ashley asked quietly. She felt the even breaths against her skin. _Well, she's not the first one I've made pass out…_ Ashley thought, her own eyelids growing heavy and almost closing before Spencer mounted her, kissing her with abandon.

_Or not._

Spencer's lips trailed a path down Ashley's body, working her way south with seemingly no intention of stopping.

_Yeah, definitely not._

-----------

Some innumerable amount of hours later, Spencer and Ashley slept in the blonde's bed, wrapped up in each other instead of the blankets. The sun was just making its way up into the sky, and the light filtering in through the blinds gave the room a golden hue, the sun's rays chasing the shadows away.

Still they slept, contentedly, safely…

…

…while Pussy kept watch.


	16. A Walk To Remember

Have you ever had anyone change your life in one day?

Well, I have.

In one day I went from hating life and wanting to die to appreciating every moment and learning to live.

She taught me how to live.

She taught me how to love.

And it all happened in one day.

This is our story.

--

Ashley Davies was severely unpopular.

Well, wait a minute, that wasn't true.

Quite the opposite, really.

Everybody knew who she was: daughter of a world-renown musician and a top-notch oncologist.

Ashley Davies was basically a by-product of the best of both worlds, born with the advantages of both fame and prosperity.

It made her destined to be an instant success or the bane of everyone else's existence.

People would learn to envy her at a very early age, her superiority at all things creative and ingenuous the subject of their respective desires.

But, over the years, that envy went through a metamorphosis, transforming into full-out spite.

This spite is what awaited young Ashley in high school. "Watch where you're going chica," Madison Duarte sniped, shoving the girl hard into a locker.

Ashley kept her head down, though. It wasn't so bad last year, but now, with her only friend in the world miles away, it seemed as though the great designer of things was out for Ashley Davies.

Having suffocated through another week of school, Ashley was driven home in silence. Miles, her driver, was well aware that Fridays were always the worse for her; her peers seemingly having saved up all their vitriol during the week.

Opening the door to an empty home, Ashley slowly scaled the stairs, pulling down the note taped to her bedroom door, informing her that "Dad and I will be home for dinner sweetie. Hope you had a good day at school. Love, Mom."

She rolled her eyes, crumpling up the piece of paper and casting it away, somewhere in her room. She knew her parents loved her and she honestly was as proud of them as they were of her but she despised who they were sometimes.

And in those times, she also despised herself.

She tossed her book bag on a desk chair before flopping down on her bed, letting the teenage angst wash over her.

Maybe it would be better if she were just gone.

--

"Ashley," she heard a voice gently call out, shaking her gently. "Ashley."

She slowly blinked open her eyes meeting those of her mother. "Rise and shine."

"Mom," she groaned, trying to roll over, but her mother stopped her.

"Come on and get dressed," she told her. "You're going to work with me today." Ashley grumbled something indecipherable but her mother merely swatted her on the bottom lightly…playfully. "Come. I want you to do something other than sit around and stare at the walls all day. There's a life to live out there Ashley."

But what's the point? she thought.

--

She wasn't a big fan of hospitals and she wasn't exactly sure why her mother would bring her to a place so devastating, a place where lives ended so frequently.

Was this supposed to make her feel more alive?

"Ashley," her mother started, smiling brightly. "I'd like you to meet Spencer. Spencer volunteers here at the hospital from time to time. Spencer, this is my daughter Ashley."

"Hi there," Spencer said kindly, sticking her hand out for a formal handshake.

"Hi," Ashley replied, a little breathless because she'd never seen blue like that before.

"Well. I'll leave you two girls to it and make my rounds. You have fun Ashley," he mother said, leaning down to kiss her on the cheek before taking off.

The two girls stood staring for a moment, unknowing of what to do…well, on Ashley's part.

"Your mom is really nice," the blonde girl said, quickly starting up conversation.

But years of mistreatment made Ashley a little more than wary of new people, and she shied away from the beautiful girl; the girl who was so much like the ones who pretended she didn't exist.

But Spencer didn't pretend, Spencer saw her, was looking right at her and still smiled that beautiful smile. "I can show you around if you want," Spencer tried again, her eyes bright, brilliant, and undeniably genuine. The precocious blonde girl stuck out her hand for Ashley to take.

With a second's hesitation Ashley took it, allowing the girl to take her wherever it was she wanted to go.

"I work with the little kids," Spencer told her, pushing open a door. "They've all got Leukemia, in different stages of course, but I swear to you Ashley, they are the most adorable children you've ever seen."

"Penser," a little girl with short curly hair squealed running at the blonde girl's legs as soon as she came into view.

"Hey Michelle," Spencer replied brightly, scooping the girl up. "How are you feeling today?"

"Like…I could play with bubbles," the girl suggested and Spencer nodded, making her beam brighter.

"Hi Spencer." This time a young boy strolled up to the pair, nervously adjusting his wire-framed glasses.

"Danny, you got your new glasses? C'mere and lemme see," she said, inspecting him lovingly. "Very handsome."

He beamed under her gaze, keeping her eyes on Ashley even as he accepted the blonde's hug.

"Who's her?" Michelle finally asked, pointing at the mute girl.

"Oh," Spencer said, reaching back with her free hand and latching on to Ashley's pulling her out of the shadows. "This is Dr. Davies' daughter, Ashley. She's gonna hang out with us today."

"Do you like bubbles?" Michelle asked her, her face still etched in caution.

Ashley couldn't help but smile. "I love 'em."

Michelle grinned, turning back to Spencer. "I like her."

--

It turned out there were a total of five children in the ward. Michelle, the youngest at three. Then there was Danny, six. Sarah, who was seven, and Jacob and Peter, both eight.

It also turned out that Ashley was pretty damn good with kids.

"And you put your ring finger on the fourth strut and that's…" she plucked the strings. "…the G-chord."

Ashley sat behind Peter, holding her hands over his on the acoustic guitar. The kid was a natural apparently, having learned a handful of songs in a little over an hour. They'd had fun though. Danny laughing so hard that milk squirted out of his nose.

Now though, they'd had their medicine and were napping, leaving the two girls alone.

Alone to have a real conversation.

Surprisingly enough, it was Ashley who started it.

"How long have you been volunteering here?"

"Quite a while," Spencer answered, hugging her arms around herself. It was cold inside the hospital.

Ashley caught the movement and slipped off her sweater, quickly draping it over the other girl without so much as a second thought.

"Thank you," Spencer grinned, then frowned slightly. "Aren't you gonna be cold?"

"I'm fine," the brunette insisted, keeping her voice quiet. "You want to go for a walk?"

Spencer's smile widened. "Sure. Let me tell Annie where we'll be."

--

The hospital had a beautiful garden which was in full bloom this time of the year.

The two girls wound down the twisting walkway, walking so close that shoulders occasionally touched and fingers brushed.

And they talked about everything.

Things that to anyone else would seem like meaningless drivel, but it was all relevant because with each work spoken Ashley revealed more of herself to the girl, and, in turn, the girl revealed more to her.

"So. Do you have a boyfriend?" she asked her, her bluer than blue eyes shining with both beauty and innocence. She twirled the daisy, her favorite flower, between her fingertips, waiting for Ashley's response.

To her, the question wasn't a loaded one, as they hardly ever are to the asker. The recipient of such questions always recognizes the intricacies and implications of answering such questions.

They knew what those implications could mean.

Especially for her.

"No," she answered, not daring to say more because she didn't want to risk losing the only friend she had.

But Spencer wouldn't let it go and when her eyes widened in shock she muttered, "Why? You're so pretty."

And Ashley couldn't not smile, her stomach twisting around crazily.

But she had very few words for moments like these and could only shrug saying, "I don't like boys."

"Well, I'm not too fond of them myself," Spencer chuckled, rolling her eyes. "In fact, the thought of liking anything that even vaguely resembles my brother makes me want to join the nunnery. But I'm sure there's someone."

Ashley shook her head. "Boys don't like me."

"Well they're crazy," Spencer alleged, her eyes carefully on the other girl. "You're funny, you're smart, and you're undeniably gorgeous. Any guy would be lucky to have you."

And her words brought a warmth to Ashley that the girl had never experienced before, a warmth that had absolutely nothing to with the California sun.

Those words echoed around in her head and only seemed to amplify when the blonde girl leveled her eyes on her, staring eye to eye…soul to soul.

It was mutual when it finally happened; their first kiss.

They leaned into one another at precisely the exact same moment and as eyes slowly drifted shut and lips blindly found each other in an intimate embrace, Spencer held Ashley's fragile heart in her fingertips, keeping it safe, if only for a moment.

She was the only one strong enough to do so, but Ashley was never aware that the blonde girl's strength lie within her ability to be vulnerable.

They kissed there, amidst the daisies, beneath an oak tree and blazing sun. And it was a kiss to remember because Ashley fell in love with Spencer Carlin. She fell in love with the blonde girl with sapphire eyes, who thought she was gorgeous and smart and funny on a walk through a garden on a breezy spring afternoon.

It was a walk to remember.

The day wore on and they returned to their duties, only there were now underlying meanings to those sly looks and shy smiles.

And when their fingers "accidentally" brushed one another's the girls fought hard not to explode into giddiness or butterflies.

Still, they played with the children, Ashley a lot more forthcoming than she'd been before, something which brought a smile to Spencer's face.

All too soon though, the day was over and Spencer had to leave, and she had to bid the girl farewell.

So, in the privacy of a small vending machine room, that's exactly what they did.

"Do you come in on Sundays?" Ashley asked, tracing a cheekbone with her thumb as she cupped the other girl's cheek.

"I do," Spencer told her, tightening her grip on Ashley's hips, leaning further into her hand.

"Then I shall see you tomorrow Spencer Carlin."

Spencer laughed as the honey-eyed girl pecked her nose. "Yes you shall, Ashley Davies."

--

I didn't see her the next day, or the ones after that,

There was a reason Spencer was so familiar with the patients in the cancer ward.

She used to be one of them.

--

Ashley was so very excited to return to the hospital, elated even.

One day and she was having dreams about the girl.

One day and Spencer Carlin was so deeply imbued in her system that it was as if they were one person. Two souls whose hearts beat to the same rhythm.

One day and she was smitten.

Nurse Annie pulled her mother aside as they entered the ward, Ashley bee-lining for the children's playroom, knowing that that's where she'd be, already entertaining the kids.

She was shocked to find it empty and when she turned back and saw her mother looking at her, her expression grave, she felt nauseous.

"Where's Spencer?" she heard herself ask.

"Oh honey," he mother murmured, crushing the girl in a tight embrace. "Spencer was very sick and although she didn't look it-"

Ashley pulled away quickly, a little shocked, a little afraid. "What are you saying?" she whispered, not really wanting to know the answer.

Her mother looked torn. "Spencer died honey, last night. She just went to sleep so it wasn-"

But Ashley didn't want to hear the rest. She was too busy running.

Running to breathe because those heavy words and all those implications would crush her if she stood still.

She ran as fast and as far as her legs would carry her, running away from a truth she was sure would kill her.

It turned out that her legs would only take her as far as the garden, to a bed of daisies, blowing gently in the wind.

Their garden.

Where Spencer's favorite flower was in full bloom.

She felt as though they were mocking her, taunting her.

She felt like everything was closing in on her and more than anything she wished she could see the blonde girl with the sapphire eyes.

So she waited…waited for her in their garden…but she never showed.

--

So here I stand at Spencer's grave.

The first girl I ever loved.

I place a fresh bundle of her favorite flowers on her grave removing the old ones.

It's been five long years since the best day of my young life, the day I started to actually live and while some details have become fuzzy with time, I'll never forget the blonde girl with sapphire eyes.

No, her, I'll always remember.

--

**MGMK - Damn it if this one doesn't always make me cry. I can admit it. I'm sensitive. I cry.**

**A/N: **

**Alright, just because I'm this bored at my new work, I want to play a little game. I want you guys to drop me a review and tell me one thing that you think is most important to know about you. Just the one. I just find it really interesting when I check out the statistics on this stories and there are like readers from all over the world checking it out and I'd also like to know more about you guys and who knows, it may inspire me to get back into this fanfiction thing all the way. I've already started some new stories but, nonetheless, it would be interesting to hear about you for a change rather than from me. So, what do you think? 20 responses minimum? Is that a good number? Nah, I'm going for 30? 30 minimum and the next chapters will be posted for each of the stories.**


	17. HO and TELL

**A/N: Okay, you guys win. I surrender. Let's see an interesting thing about me is that I've never seen a single South of Nowhere episode...oh and that I'm a pathological liar. J/K. Here you go!!**

--

"What's the name of the hotel again? …and you couldn't find me anything better than that?...Seriously Adrian, if you aren't gonna work right for me then why bother working….what do you mean your name's Aiden? Don't be ridiculous. I know my own assistant's name…"

Ashley flipped a business card out of her pocket, running her fingers over the embossed lettering before stating with the utmost pride and assuredness that her "assistant's name is Aiden P. Dennison…huh, would you look at that…okay, alright, so I'm not perfect sue me. You're still incompetent. What does the 'P' stand for anyway?" *snickers* "Percival? Wow, that's rich. Okay, I'm hanging up now, we've just reached the shit hole hotel. Please have this fixed by morning. I do not want to have to fire you…again. Thank you. Smooches."

"Where would you like us to drop you Miss Davies?"

"Out front's fine," she said, closing her cell phone and storing it away in her suit jacket, simultaneously peering out of the window at the hotel - Hilton: Chicago. "Four stars my ass," she muttered. "They probably don't even have bellhops in this joint."

To her surprise they did have a bellhop. A rather smashing young lad if she must say. But could she really stoop to the depths of hotel worker.

"Hello Ma'am. Welcome to the Hilton in Chicago. How can I make this evening pleasant for you?" he drawled, bowing dramatically but keeping his blue eyes on her form all the while.

Could she stoop to the depths of hotel worker?

Yes.

Yes, she could.

"Yeah," she said, matching his smirk with one of her own. "Could you please take my bags up to my room? It would be rather appreciated…Glen," she added, reading his nametag.

"My pleasure," he grinned, lugging the baggage like nothing and starting toward the elevator.

Maybe this experience wouldn't be that bad.

--

She threw him down onto the bed, being a little rougher than usual, but she was still pissed about the thread-count of the sheets and well…somebody had to pay for it.

"You like it a little rough huh?" the bellhop said, still trying to take his uniform shirt off. His jacket had long since departed his form, albeit brutally. Ashley had taken liberty to free each and every button from the garment upon their entry into the hotel room.

"Stop talking," she murmured, diving atop him again, and sealing her lips over his. He wasn't a bad kisser, if she didn't concentrate much on his facial hair and cologne that he apparently liked to bathe in – often.

She pulled her blouse off, not caring about the garment, so much as cooling off her heated skin and he gawked openly at her nearly naked chest, raising his hands to take greedy handfuls, intent on making his mouth do the same. Just as he pulled one cup down to expose a ready and waiting nipple his pager went off.

They froze.

"Ignore it," she said, tugging his head forward, and he tried but-

"It could be my dad. And if it's my dad, I might be in trouble,"

"You're seriously gonna pass up on all of this," she said, her hands gesturing to her body…waiting body.

God, Glen looked conflicted.

But luckily he listened to his brain and not his…you know, or else this would have been a very different fic.

"I'll be right back," he said, at the door. He moved in to kiss her but she merely turned her cheek, bored already.

Ashley held the robe – hers, she refused to wear anything from this hotel – closer to her body, sitting down wearily on the bed. That freaking bellboy really wound her up and silly her left P.P.F. at home, in her nightstand.

Damn.

Guess it's back to the old showerhead.

--

Spencer popped another bubble, much to her mother's dislike.

Not that she minded. She did lots of things her mother disliked nowadays.

Or just one thing: her lesbianism.

Whatever.

POP!

Another bubble.

"And Spencer you have the west wing on the seventh floor," her father concluded, flipping closed the clip board. "Okay. Does anyone have any questions? No? Alright then. Let's get cleaning."

"This is the dumbest summer job ever," Cara, her cousin, said, as they both went to get their cleaning carts. "I don't see how barely cleaning a hotel room for rich snobs is supposed to help us build character."

Spencer shrugged. "It's supposed to cure me of my gayness but I've been hit on by more women than men so that's not exactly working out."

Cara laughed. "Yeah. A summer of servitude for a tattoo. It's not even permanent either."

"At least the tips are good," Spencer said, popping her earbuds into her ear to help drown out the elevator music. "What floor you have?"

"Seventh. East wing,"

"Sweet. Meet you back at the elevator in an hour?"

"Alright."

--

Spencer was breezing through her assignment.

Do not disturb signs adorned nearly every door and the few that weren't occupied were in near pristine condition because people who enjoy luxury never want people to think that they're dirty.

It's all about appearances the higher up in the tax bracket you scale.

Speaking of scaling, Spencer really needed to cut back on the donuts because she was near passed out when she reached the fifth to last room with nearly a half hour left to kill.

The door knob didn't have a sign on it but she knocked anyway, an unfortunate event with a man twice her age and about forty times her weight coming to the forefront of her mind. Since then, she'd decided that knocking was a perfectly good practice and should be implemented as much as humanly possible.

Getting no answer however she cranked up the volume on her iPod and shuffled right in, cart in hand.

The room was pretty much okay, save for the bed and the small little objects scattered across the floor and a few articles of discarded clothing. The person's luggage was still standing by the side of the door, which she thought was odd, but she forged onward. She had a job to do.

Spencer went over to the window and opened it wide, pulling the curtains as far back as possible. "Nice view," she said, jokingly as all she could see was yet another massive brick building.

Skyscrapers are cool unless you live in Chicago.

In which case, they're only view blockers.

Nevertheless, she left the curtains open and for a second thought about just making up the bed and hightailing it out of there, but she hadn't even looked at the bathroom yet, and she really didn't need to give her parents (read: mother) another reason to be disappointed in her.

iPod on blast, Spencer rolled her cleaning cart over to the open bathroom door, backing in to the place and almost busting her head open on the sink as she slipped on some standing water on the floor.

"God," she said, holding onto her ankle as she turned (read: limped) around and nearly passed out at what she saw. Behind the shower curtain was a woman, undoubtedly a woman, getting in touch with herself (pun totally intended), and completely oblivious to her surroundings.

Spencer's ears turned redder than Rudolph's nose as the blush spread like wildfire across her face. The temperature in the room read inferno as far as she was concerned and she could not for the life of her tear her eyes away from the sight. The woman was barely standing, leaning on the shower wall for support as she worked herself over with the shower massager. Spencer could hear the pulsating water speeds changing along with the staccato of the woman's breaths. They went from deep heaving breaths, to almost strangled cries of pleasure, rising over and over again until finally, they just tailed off into choked off whispers, a name, a shudder, then the collapse.

Spencer blinked for the first time since seeing the woman when a few drops of water somehow managed to fly in her direction. The woman still stilted on the shower floor chuckled deeply, before muttering a "Damn, I'm good" and then gasping as her eyes finally caught glimpse of the stranger standing in her bathroom.

"Who the fuck are you?"

Spencer nearly fell again in panic. "Uh…"

"Fuck," Ashley cursed, grabbing a hotel towel and wrapping up in it before turning off the shower. "Seriously, you'd better speak right now."

"I'm sorry. I just…I was cleaning...knocked…didn't hear, obviously…"

"Whoa, whoa. What?" the brunette asked, pushing the shower curtain aside and finally getting a clear look at Spencer – shaking, red-faced, panicking Spencer.

"Housekeeping," Spencer squeaked out, so tremulous it almost sounded like a question.

Ashley barked out a laugh. "This is really starting to sound like a bad porno flick. If the next words out of your mouth are 'Need a hand?' I'm breaking out the video camera."

"S-s-sorry," Spencer stuttered out, ducking her head and pushing the cart out of the bathroom, Ashley following behind her, but Spencer didn't know that.

She stopped near the bed, pulling out a fresh sheet when, "So how long were you in there?"

The blonde nearly KO'd the other woman, her arms swinging wildly from the close proximity of the brunette, the question whispered directly in her ear.

"Not l-l-long," she managed to stutter out, once she got her bearings back, and some distance between her and the brunette.

"Beginning, Middle, or End?" Ashley inquired, her face belying some kind of amusement.

Spencer's face caught fire again. "End-ish?" she barely said, stripping the sheets off the bed and balling them up before disposing of them in her cart.

"Like what you saw?"

Can you swallow your own tongue? I've heard you can. Spencer certainly did.

"Excuse me?"

"Did. You. Like. What. You. Saw?"

Spencer just about fainted, and there was no answering that question, at least not for her. But Ashley didn't need an answer. Not really. "Your silence speaks volumes you know," she said, somehow having found her way back to Spencer again, her mouth very close to her ear, so close that her lips brushed against it with every whispered word.

She gently placed her hands on Spencer's hips, tacitly requesting she stand still, as if Spencer had another option. Then she placed them on Spencer's shoulders, trailing her fingers down until they reached her forearms where she lightly drug her nails up and down the soft skin she found there.

"Are you trying to seduce me?" Spencer barely managed to ask.

Ashley chuckled. "If you have to ask I'm not doing a very good job," she murmured. "I'm Ashley by the way."

"Spencer," the blonde said, moving her own hands so that they rested on Ashley's still towel clad thighs.

"Nice to meet you Spencer," Ashley said, her hands moving to untie Spencer's apron.

"You too," the blonde breathed, finally gathering enough courage to turn around and face her seductress. She tugged at the towel. "Take this off?"

"Go for it," Ashley smirked, eyes on Spencer's.

Spencer slowly brought her hands upward, grabbing both ends of the little knot holding the towel in place, undoing them quickly before ripping the towel off the brunette, eyeing the goddess with admiration.

"Wow," Spencer breathed out, her eyes scanning up and down.

"Yeah, let's see what wow you're working with," Ashley said with a grin, opening the girl's shirt without much protest. Well, protest that she listened to.

--

Glen grumbled all the way up the elevator. It could not be possible that his father called him away from what was quite possibly the hottest hook-up ever to unclog a shower drain.

Pissed was an understatement.

Nevertheless, maybe with a little schmoozing he could get back in with the wildcat in room 716.

Using the card key he'd swiped from the service desk, Glen straightened up a little bit before opening the door and nearly combusting on sight.

"Glen!" Spencer squealed, clutching the sheets around her as she scrambled from underneath Ashley.

Ashley merely fixed him with a bored look. "Look, guy, do you mind? I'm kind of busy here."

"I….I-I-I-I'm gonna go," he stuttered out, turning abruptly and walking right into the closed hotel room door. He scrambled to his feet pretty quickly though and hightailed it out of there as fast as his legs would carry him.

Once the door finally closed Ashley turned back to look at Spencer who was still worriedly clutching the sheet. When she finally brought her gaze back to the brunette's she couldn't help letting out a little laugh in relief. Ashley giggled a little and pretty soon they were laughing heartily against each other.

"I thought he was gonna implode. Did you see how red he was?"

Spencer nodded, still chortling. "I almost lost it when he walked into the door."

"Yeah," Ashley agreed, her laughter subsiding a little. She shifted on the bed, so that she hovered just above Spencer.

Spencer chuckled a little bit more before finally settling and looking up at the woman smiling down at her. "Yeah," she whispered, reaching her hands up to tuck brown curls behind two perfect ears.

"So…Spencer…how much trouble are you gonna be in? You've been in here for a while and I'm fairly certain that you're not being paid to sleep with hotel guests,"

"Right you are," she murmured, pulling the brunette down and kissing her lips gently. "But, honestly, we haven't been sleeping," she added, catching Ashley off-guard with a sneak attack under the sheets.

"Besides, it's not my fault room 716 was a bitch to clean."


	18. The Web We Weave

**The Web We Weave**

**Rating: **World Wide Web Fluff

**-----**

Spencer practically ran home from school.

High school was hellish to endure when you were her type of girl: the girl who had everything and then had it all taken away from her in one fell swoop.

It all had started hen her father got sick, dreadfully sick. She was so young when it began, barely old enough to know what the words meant; cancer, lungs, radiation, and chemotherapy.

By the time she'd reached her teens these words became mainstays in her vocabulary. But, when she turned fifteen, her world fell apart.

"_Hey sweetheart," he said, one afternoon, after school._

"_Hi Dad," she said, throwing her backpack down and crashing into his embrace. She loved how he always smelled of peppermint candies and today was no exception. She took a big whiff as she relaxed into his embrace, shifting so that she was now sitting next to him on the couch, still close._

"_How was school today?"_

_She rolled her bright blue eyes, a rueful expression on her face. _

"_Long," she said, and he laughed a little, his eyes sparkling a lot, like they used to. She grinned back but then it turned a little sheepish. "Do you remember the boy I told you about, the one from my chemistry class?"_

_Arthur nodded knowingly, poking her in the cheek. "I believe his name is Sean, am I correct?"_

"_Yes Dad," she said dramatically, her cheeks turning a little pink, even though she didn't want them to. "Well, anyway, he kinda, um, carried my books today."_

_She muttered the last part but he caught every word._

"_He carried your books?" he echoed, his voice portraying an heir of importance. "Sounds like someone's getting serious."_

_The teasing tone of his voice made her blush again. "Daddy."_

"_I kid. I kid," he said, eyes still twinkling. "I do want to talk to you about something though."_

"_What?" she questioned, folding her feet underneath herself to face him properly. He seemed to be struggling with something. "What Daddy?"_

"_I just want you to know that I am very proud of you sweetheart, very proud. And, I want you to enjoy life, and all of its experiences – the good and the bad. Learn from all of them and when you find love, because I know you will, don't shy away from it, embrace it, relish it, and cherish it with all of your being because it's the greatest feeling in the world."_

_She watched him closely, imprinting every word on her mind and in her heart. "I will Dad. I promise."_

_He embraced her again, drawing her close to his heart, dropping a kiss to the top of her head. "I'm dying Spencer."_

Glen took his death extremely hard, they all did really. The grief just manifested itself in different ways.

Her mom focused on work, donated each and almost every ounce of her being to it. Spencer believed it was her intent to work so hard, be so diligent in it, that there would be no brainpower to dedicate to thinking about her late husband.

Clay, the oldest, went on to college – far, far, far away. He kept his father's memory by researching causes and cures of different forms of cancer, dedicating all his efforts, always, to Arthur Carlin.

Glen wanted to forget. Or, at least, that's what he finally told her when she found him one night, nearly nude and shaking almost feverishly from symptoms stemming from withdrawal. Sometimes, if he got high enough, he claimed he could. He woke up from the haze though, one night when he found his car wrapped around a pole. He walked away from the accident scratch-free but more broken than ever. He stopped using but replaced one habit with the desire to get away.

He signed up for the Air Force as soon as he turned eighteen, finding, finally she guessed, a way to be physically closer to his father.

She internalized it all, never spoke about it. Though, her actions clearly displayed her grief.

She dyed her bright blonde hair pitch black and stopped wearing colorful clothes, favoring a wardrobe devoid of any light. She chose, instead, to hide behind a mask of grays, black, and whites, wishing that her feelings could be just as neutral.

She became a social outcast at school, strictly because of her own doing. Her friends tried to get in but she'd painstakingly created a wall so strong, so impenetrable, that they wondered whether she'd ever be reached again.

So, that was her story: the unreachable grieving girl, but it all changed…that day.

She'd recently taken a liking to online chat rooms. At first, her mother suggested she share her experiences with other grieving children, including those who'd lost a parent. She tried, but found those rooms to be extremely oppressive, stifling even. Eventually, though, she found amusement in the different rooms, especially the romantic ones.

She was still chortling to herself about the recent events in which Jason, self-proclaimed online sex stud, apparently unknowingly spent the afternoon chatting up another guy when the PM came in.

She was startled at first when the small window popped up. Her first instinct was to close it out, used to being hit on, accosted, and otherwise annoyed by online chatters. But, she thought better of it, opting to reply to the simple "hi" in the small box.

"Hi," she wrote back, watching the screen curiously.

"Finally,"

Then…

"It's nice to finally have someone write back and not just to proposition me for cyber sex."

Spencer almost smiled. "Me too. But aren't you jumping the gun a bit?"

A moment.

"How so?"

"Well, I could just be being nice to you so that, when the time comes, you won't be as rash when declining my proposition."

"True. Guess I'll have to tae my chances then, huh?"

"Guess so," is all Spencer replies, biting back a smile.

"Can I get your name though? Before you start with the propositions?"

"You first,"

"Okay then. My name's Ashley."

"That's…unique."

"Uh, you think so?"

"Well…it's an interesting name for a boy."

"Oh, so I guess it's not so interesting since I'm a girl."

Spencer's fingers froze. "Come again."

"I'm a girl," Ashley re-types and Spencer blinks, but not for any other reason besides that she'd been smiling, blushing, getting butterflies in her tummy because of another girl, a stranger no less.

"You there?"

"I'm a girl," Spencer types and sends, stupidly, on impulse.

"Um…cool?" Ashley almost asks and it almost makes Spencer laugh, almost.

"So…girl, do you have a name?"

Spencer does laugh this time, typing her name with quickness.

"Spencer," Ashley re-types. "Now that's unique."

And that was how it started – their online friendship. They shared minor details with one another, mediocre stuff like their ages and where they lived. They were both basically the same age, Spencer just a few months older. And they were virtually neighbors, in the way that Nevada is a neighbor to California. Ashley lived in Vegas and Spencer was from the City of Angels.

It fascinated the blonde (by nature) girl, of course, that she could spend so much time talking to a virtual stranger. But, it fascinated her more that the talking would turn into flirting, and then of course Spencer would think "Oh my God, she's a girl," and inevitably switch topics or exit the conversation altogether.

That is, until Ashley started calling her beautiful. This was often.

"So….what do you look like?"

Spencer stilled for a moment. "Wow. How long did it take you to build up the courage to ask me that?"

"About two weeks?"

"Lol. You're funny."

"And you're stalling. Want me to go first?"

"Actually, yeah. Would you mind?" She bit her nails.

"Nervous?"

"Kinda," she admitted.

"Well, I am too. But here goes anyway."

Spencer saw the file pop up immediately, a picture.

"I'm the one on the left," Ashley typed.

Spencer maneuvered the mouse over the accept button, lingering momentarily before clicking on the file and downloading the picture.

Clicking open, the screen expanded to the size of the picture where a group of girls sat in front of a house, the night desert the backdrop, looking beautiful as the sun was at the time making its descent until morning. In the picture were three girls, sitting on the steps of a porch, all smiles and glowing brown eyes.

Spencer noticed Ashley's sparkled the best.

She couldn't restrain herself (or her fingers) and instantly typed the first thing on her mind.

"So pretty."

"Huh?"

Spencer's eyes widened, realizing what she'd typed. "The sky. It's pretty."

"Oh, okay. But, what about me? I mean, I don't look hideous or anything right?"

Spencer looked her over once more. She took in the girl's hair, her brown curls falling loose and framing her face. Ashley had a perfect smile, and to top it off, her nose crinkled when she does so. 'I mean, how cute is that?' Spencer thought. And, although, she didn't consider herself to be an expert on the female form at all, but Ashley was what Glen would call 'smokin' hot.'

"You do not look hideous Ashley. At. All."

"Lol. Alright, come on. I've shown you mine…"

Spencer searched her pictures file, very quickly, trying to find a picture where she wasn't making faces at the camera or drooling. Glen used to like catching pictures of everyone as they slept. She settled on a family photo, one with her dad in it.

She sent it, Ashley accepted it, and then she waited.

…

"Wow."

Now, she could breathe again.

"Wow?" she questioned, only because she didn't know what else to type.

"Yeah, wow. You're…you're really gorgeous Spencer."

Spencer's face went bright red. "Ash."

"Nope. You're beautiful, and that's the end of that."

Spencer hoped not.

--

A few weeks later and they had foregone the online chats, preferring communication a little more natural.

Spencer hadn't anticipated her mother being home to intercept the initial call.

Racing downstairs, she'd barely rounded the corner when she heard her mom's confused voice listened on as someone prattled on about…was it…yes, an electric juicer.

"I'm sure your products are very well manufactured but you see we just don't need a…who'd you speak with?...Spencer, huh?" Paula popped an eyebrow at her daughter, who actually looked rather amused as she took a step closer.

"Well, I can assure you-" Paula managed before Spencer snatched the handset out of her hands.

"I've got it Mom," Spencer said, bringing the phone to her ear. "You're such a moron," she whispered/giggled into the receiver, hurrying up the stairs before her mother could intervene too much. "An electric juicer? Really?"

"Hey, don't hate the player, hate the game."

"What does that even mean?" Spencer asked her, falling onto her bed after closing the door.

"I have no idea," Ashley replied, and then they grew quiet, the reality of it probably just catching up with them. "So, hi."

"Hi," Spencer said, her voice sounding a lot softer and shyer than before.

"It's great to finally hear your voice," Ashley said, well purred is probably the better adjective, and would probably explain away Spencer's blush.

"Me too. I mean, it's good to finally hear you too."

"Not weird at all, huh?" Ashley joked, trying to ease the tension.

"No, not at all," Spencer said, and she meant it. It was anything but awkward to talk to Ashley. It had always been that way. And she was starting to think that her nerves now had more to do with a developing crush than any real anxiety.

"Your voice is really nice," Ashley said, and Spencer could almost hear her smile, which made her smile too. "And I am such a dork," she added, making Spence giggle.

"Well, I like dorks," Spencer ventured, getting a little more brazen with her comments as time wore on. She knew Ashley was gay, and, as far as she knew, Spencer wasn't, but, she did know that she had an attraction to Ashley that was bordering on uncontrollable. A little mild flirting could do no harm.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah. Steve Urkel rocks my world," she deadpanned and Ashley actually giggled.

Spencer decided that she liked that…a lot.

--

Glen was home a few weeks and she decided to make a surprise visit to Ashley's house.

She'd run the idea of staying with a friend for a week or so by her mother some time ago, but it was basically her decision, since she'd recently turned eighteen and all.

It was the third week of summer and the girls had been speaking non-stop for about two months. They'd ventured into that hazy zone just past friendship but just before…everything else. It was okay though, in Spencer's opinion, the unknown. So much in her life had been shifted around that one more thing didn't throw her off-course. But, she also found comfort in the unshaken foundation the two girls had developed.

Ashley had become her best friend, confidant, and she easily considered her the person who cared about her the most.

That title used to belong to her dad.

She'd been thinking about him a lot lately, and instead of the overwhelming pain of separation she usually felt whenever someone brought him up, she'd just remember their last big talk and all of the things he said to her.

She wondered if this was what he was talking about.

But then she stopped thinking when they pulled up in front of the address.

"Don't pull away until I'm in, okay," she cautioned, remembering when they were younger and Glen had much better things to do (literally) than baby-sit his baby sister.

"No, duh, Spence. Hurry up though. It's hotter than…really hot stuff out here."

She nervously made her way up the walkway, looking for the doorbell but then deciding against it and just reaching for her cell phone.

Ashley answered on the second ring. "Hello."

"Hey, Ash,"

"Spence, what's up?" Ashley asked, smiling. Spencer could tell.

"Nothing much, just out and about, you know?" She rang the doorbell.

"Sure," Ashley replied, voice sounding amused. "You take some crazy pills this morning?"

"Maybe," Spencer said, rifling a hand through her limp (and back to blonde) hair. It really was hot there. "Do you have air conditioning?"

"Yes," Ashley stated haltingly and Spencer listened intently. It sounded like Ashley was closer. It felt like Ashley was closer.

"Good," Spencer stated as the door was unlocked.

"Yeah, are you sure you're oka-" Ashley stopped talking right there.

The door was open.

And so was her mouth.

"Uh…hey," Spencer said, giving her a little wave.

"Oh. My. God," Ashley said, then immediately decided she'd expound on her excitement later and instead wrapped Spencer up in a lengthy embrace.

The girls only broke away when Glen honked his horn, ready to hit up a few casinos.

"Oh, right," Spencer said, turning back to the other girl. "Is it okay if I stay with you for a little while? Glen wants to go casino and hotel hopping and I don't even want to thin-"

"Spencer, shut up. Of course you can stay," Ashley said with a laugh and walked out to the car to help grab her suitcase.

--

Ashley couldn't stop staring at her.

"You're doing it again," Spencer said, popping another kernel of popcorn into her mouth.

The brunette blushed a little, pressing her lips together to hold back a smile. "I can't help it. I can't believe you're actually here."

Spencer didn't exactly know how to respond to that. She hunched her shoulders, trying to find the words. "Well, I am…here, that is."

"And…" Ashley started, ignoring the screaming and otherwise abjectly horrifying things that were taking place on the screen and slyly grabbing Spencer's free, non-popcorn-eating hand. "You're even cuter in person than you are over the phone."

Spencer felt her heart thud and stared helplessly at the television set, hoping that the gore would distract her enough that she wouldn't be acutely aware of the other girl's hand on hers, the proximity of them both, or the way Ashley smelled of light vanilla and something else equally as pleasant.

She wasn't having any luck though.

Ashley's other hand moved in slow motion towards her face, placing some of Spencer's long blonde hair behind an ear.

Ashley smiled a little, her eyes sweeping over Spencer's profile. "You are…beautiful."

What happened next was completely unexpected, but not really when she thought about it later. After all, she did promise.

"…_and when you find love, because I know you will, don't shy away from it, embrace it, relish it, and cherish it with all of your being because it's the greatest feeling in the world."_

_She watched him closely, imprinting every word on her mind and in her heart. "I will Dad. I promise."_

So when Ashley leaned into her, intent on kissing the blonde, Spencer didn't shy away, content to allow herself to feel, perhaps, the greatest feeling in the world.


	19. Sk8r Girl

**A/N: Hey guys, just dropping in to let you know that the poll will be closing soon and to remind you to please vote if you haven't. You can access the poll by clicking on my pen name. Thanks. Enjoy.**

**---**

"Almost halftime girls," Madison said, swishing her pom-poms (the actual ones) high above her head.

"She's gonna tell us that every time isn't she?" Kerri whispered to Ashley, leaning over subtly.

Ashley chuckled quietly but ceased immediately when Madison turned to look at her. "You got something to say Davies?" she asked, her eyes narrowing.

"No," Ashley said, looking to Kerri. "You have anything to say Ker?"

"Nope," Kerri said, looking back to Madison. "We have absolutely nothing to say."

"Oh. Well…okay then," Madison said before turning back around.

"What a moron," Kerri whispered, snickering with Ashley right after.

They shut up abruptly when Madison whipped around again.

The buzzer finally went off, signaling half time and the beginning of the girls' performance. Just about the entire student body population was inside the gymnasium that evening.

But there was a small population that was not. They were outside in the parking lot, taking advantage of the absence of bodies to rip up the school grounds.

On their boards.

They were the slackers, the stoners, the batch of high school kids that stood out like a 34 year-old (Lance Bass) at an 'Nsync concert.

But most importantly they were skateboarders.

Shane kick-flipped onto the stair rail, before grinding the entire length of the thing, bailing at the last second before he broke an ankle or worse.

"Ha ha, loser," Ryan said, flipping her board up into her hands. "Major cop out."

"Dude," he said, dusting himself off. "Those are hard. There's like no friction at all and I'm not bustin' my ass for no 50 bucks."

"You're such a baby," Ryan sneered again, just as a blonde girl, roughly her height, rolled up.

She was wearing some cut off cords, hung low on her hips; the gray and white pinstripe bottoms being held up by a studded leather belt with about three chained belt clips hanging on it. Her hoodie, sporting the logo skate or die, complimented her nicely, but it fit a little loosely, adding to her skater appeal. The blue shirt she wore was the only thing remotely feminine about her, being covered in flowers, and it also served to bring out her eyes more, if possible. Keeping up with the skaters aren't supposed to match trend though she completed the look with red plaid checkered vans, and matching hat, her hair tied back in a messy ponytail.

"50 bucks," she asked, sizing up the rail. "I'll do it…backside too."

Shane's jaw dropped, even Bucky, the only one of 'em who'd ever actually competed before, looked at her like she was crazy. "There's not enough room. Even if you grind the whole thing you're not gonna be able to land."

There was a car to the right side of the rail, and cold pavement on the other. On the off possibility she completed the grind, she'd either smash right into the concrete or scrape the car.

But she'd be a legend if she did it.

I always knew skateboarders were a little bit crazy.

"I'm gonna do it," she grinned, starting up the stairs.

"She's crazy," Shane whispered.

"She's nuts," Bucky added.

"She's awesome," Ryan said, throwing up her arms. "Woo hoo! Spencer!"

-----------

The game was finally over.

Thank God.

The Cobras sucked.

And Blew.

"God, this place is a sty," Kerri said, kicking away the burger wrappers and empty Styrofoam cups that littered the walkway. "You'd think these people were raised in a junkyard," she added, slipping into the passenger side of Ashley's car.

Ashley made her way around to the driver's side but stopped just short of the gas tank. There was a scratch on her car.

A sliver streak marring the impeccable smooth of her black paint.

Someone had desecrated her baby.

Furious, Ashley tossed her bags and things into the back seat before climbing in and slamming the door irately.

"Fucking fuckers, fucking fuck FUCK!!"

Kerri merely turned to her friend, "Who did what to you now?"

"Some asshole put a scratch the size of the grand canyon on my car. The bastard,"

"But, how? We're, like, parked near the door, you'd have to do something like that on purpose," Kerri reasoned.

"I don't fucking know but-"

"What's that?" Kerri asked, pointing at the windshield.

Ashley followed her line of vision and saw the piece of folded paper tucked under one of the wipers.

"Well?"

"Well what?" Ashley asked.

Kerri sighed. "It's obviously for you airhead," she said, reaching out of her window to retrieve the object. "Maybe it's from the jerk-off that scratched your car."

"Maybe…" Ashley said, taking the note from her, reading the script silently, smiling a little at the way the I's had little hearts instead of dots. Just like she wrote them.

_To the owner of the BMW 335i –_

_First of all, nice ride. You have good taste. Second of all, that scratch on the driver's side? I did that. I was being stupid and totally let a grind get away from me. But it would've been really sick had I landed though. I don't have enough money to take care of it right now, but in a couple of weeks I could give it to you. Maybe we could meet tomorrow at school in the quad fifth period so we can discuss payment arrangements._

_Spence_

_P.S. Didn't this whole thing sound so Geico commercial?_

Ashley was unable to contain her laughter at the closing remark and handed the letter over to Kerri to read.

"I don't get it. What's a grind?"

"I think it's a skateboard trick," Ashley answered, remembering her ex-boyfriend Aiden mentioning it while playing some video game.

"Ew, it's from one of those grungy skaters," Kerri squealed, dropping the note back into Ashley's lap. "Oh, I am so not going with you. We can not be seen in public with those…people."

"Relax Ker," Ashley said; the more reasonable of the two friends. "I highly doubt that we'll be reduced to social lepers from one interaction. Besides, this is strictly business. If this guy Spence or whatever wants to pay for the damage he's done to my car then I'm gonna let him."

"Who is Spence anyway?" Kerri said, fastening her seatbelt as Ashley started to put the car in drive. "I've never heard of him."

"Guess we'll be finding out tomorrow."

-----------

**Fifth Period**

"Here they come," Ryan said, standing beside Spencer as the two cheerleaders walked up.

"Wonder how they figured out it was us?" Shane asked, rolling his skateboard back and forth. "I mean, Spence never exactly said anything about boards."

"Maybe they used their two brain cells and figured it out," Bucky cruelly joked.

"Shut up," Spencer said, not amused. "You don't know them."

"And they don't know us. But look at the way the red-head's eyeing us. You'd think we had the plague or something,"

-----------

"Oh Ashley, I don't know about this," Kerri squealed as they approached the pack of skaters. "I mean, the short one has potential, but God. Two words: Sun. Light."

"Shut up Ker," Ashley hissed, adjusting her uniform. "Now, which one looks like he could be a Spence?"

Kerri looked the guys over. "None of 'em really. They all look like Jasons or Slaters to me."

"Kerri?!"

"You asked."

-----------

They stood in front of each other for the longest time before Ashley finally spoke up.

"Is, um, one of you guys Spence?"

Spencer, wearing some loose cargo jeans and an oversized hoodie, stepped up, her long hair cascading from her hat when she removed it. "That's me," she said, smiling brightly and holding out her fist for Ashley to bump.

Ashley kind of stood there stupidly, staring at the extended hand unmoving.

"O…kay then," Spencer said, pulling her hand back. "I guess you're here about your car."

Ashley, still slack-jawed, kinda nodded as her friend finally spoke up for her. "Yeah, you ruined her car."

"You're exaggerating," Spencer said, not really giving the other girl that much attention. She was kinda more interested in the brunette.

"Well, you owe her," Kerri shot back, putting her hands on her hips.

"I know. I was actually thinking that I could invite her to dinner. You know, nothing big. It's gonna be a while before I'll be able to pay you back," Spencer said, grounding her eyes.

"What?!" Kerri asked, incredulous. Was this girl asking her friend out on a date?

"Yeah, what?!" Ryan echoed, looking at her friend like she'd sprouted another head.

"Sure," Ashley said, squirming under her friend's gaze, which she now knew was fixed on her. "I mean, cool, whatever," she shrugged.

"Alright then," Spencer beamed. "This Saturday cool?"

"This Saturday's perfect," Ashley assured her, matching the blonde's grin with one of her own.

Kerri had to literally drag her friend away from the other girl. "Uh…what was that?"

"What? She can't afford to fix my car so she's treating me to dinner. I don't see what's wrong with that."

"Uh…she's a girl. And what you just described, just totally sounded like a date,"

"Oh God Kerri. You are beyond paranoid sometimes,"

"We'll see if you're still saying that when she's trying to score."

-----------

"This Saturday's perfect," Ryan whispered into her ear as Spencer put her cap back on.

Spencer groaned, shoving her away as they playfully teased her. "Spencer's going on a date," Bucky said, coasting alongside them as they picked their way back to school. "And with a cheerleader."

"Okay, it is not a date," Spencer corrected, before it got out of hand. "And, seriously, defining someone by what they like to do is not something we should be advocating or participating in."

"Amen, sister," Shane said, slinging his free arm around her neck. His other arm had his best board tucked under it. "Now, seriously, because I've always wanted to ask this question, when two girls go out, who picks up the check?"

"Ugh," she groaned chasing after him. "It's not a date."

Ryan and Bucky shared a knowing look. "It is _so_ a date."

-----------

**Saturday Night**

Ashley walked into the diner Spencer directed her to meet her at.

But not before checking her reflection in the glass for the tenth time that night. While this was most definitely still not a date, she still decided to at least look nice. She might run into someone who knew her from school and she did have a reputation to maintain.

The place was kinda empty she noticed, especially for a Saturday night, and there was no sign of Spencer in sight. Suddenly, someone with a white apron on reached out to touch her shoulder, startling her.

She jumped back in fright, until her eyes met with electric blue ones and a warm smile.

"Sorry. I'll be right out. Aunt Peg was runnin' a little late so I had to stay after my shift," Spencer said, waiting until Ashley nodded her understanding before walking away again.

Ashley's eyes roamed around the place and settled on the Daily Special chalkboard. She smiled softly when she noticed the little hearts dotting the I's.

"What's so funny?" Spencer asked, now changed into something more suitable for dinner. It wasn't something she could get away with wearing at a 5-Star restaurant, but it was definitely an upgrade from the apron.

"Oh, I was just thinking about something…Mr. Thompson said earlier,"

"Ah," Spencer said, taking her seat opposite Ashley. "What a douche," she added, rolling her eyes.

Ashley laughed so hard she snorted, and then blushed wickedly when she realized it.

"Ha, ha," Spencer chuckled, more than amused and even more so as Ashley reddened further.

"Oh my God. How embarrassing?" Ashley muttered, holding her hands over her face.

She felt soft hands take hold of her own. "Don't," Spencer told her with a soft smile. "It's cute. I mean, it's genuine you know."

"Uh…sure," Ashley eeked out, watching as Spencer's hands still covered her own, sitting on the table.

They locked eyes briefly before quickly averting them, Spencer beckoning to one of the waiters. "Let's eat huh?"

-----------

Ashley's eyes widened as the nice old lady who'd made their burgers and fries now brought out two small plates, both with a steaming slice of cherry pie with whipped cream on top.

"Oh no, Spencer," she whined, eyeing the lady wearily. "I can't eat anymore. I'm gonna get fat."

"It's not a possibility," Spencer replied, clearing some pace for the plates. "Not with those abs."

Uh, what?

"Huh?"

"I just…you'll work it off. I'm sure. Besides, you'll still be cute, even if you were a few pounds chubbier."

Ashley could've swooned but, hey, wait, was Spencer hitting on her?

She didn't dwell on it too long as the pie arrived, and it did look good, and Spencer was making it look better.

"Mmm," she moaned, loudly, taking a bite of the desert, closing her eyes after that first taste. She licked some of the whipped cream off of her fork and winked at Ashley, whose face burned like…something that really burns.

"It's really good Ashley," she said, grinning at the brunette. "Try some…" she said, offering a forkful to the other girl. "Please?"

Ashley, still a little reluctant, found that she couldn't resist the little pout and instinctively moved forward so as to better reach the food. As soon as the desert touched her tongue her taste buds exploded with the rich taste of sugary cherries, and flaky pie crust, intermingling with the airy sweetness of freshly whipped cream. "That," she mumbled, through a mouthful. "That is so…"

"Warm? Sweet? Juicy?" Spencer offered her own litany of adjectives.

"I was gonna say good," Ashley said, reddening again. "But those work too."

Spencer chuckled deep in her throat, re-submerging her fork into the pie. "You're really cute when you're blushing, you know?"

And Ashley didn't know.

That is, she didn't know until then.

"Uh…"

"Question is: why are you blushing? See, for the most part people blush when they're unnerved, distressed…uncomfortable," Spencer said, her voice soft yet alluring. "Do I make you uncomfortable Ashley?" she asked, taking in another bite of pie.

"No," Ashley answered truthfully. "No, you don't." And Spencer really didn't. It was how she was responding to Spencer that was making her uncomfortable.

"You sure?" the blonde inquired further, popping an eyebrow. She picked up a stray cherry from her plate with her fingers, bringing the fruit to her mouth slowly. She kept her eyes on Ashley as she guided the fruit across the tip of her tongue, giving it a few light licks before rolling her tongue out to devour the fruit, Ashley's eyes closing briefly as she did so.

"Ash?"

"Hmm?" The brunette's eyes popped open.

"Are you sure I'm not making you uncomfortable?" the blonde gave her a measured smile: part teasing, part genuine.

"This…this uh," Ashley started, finding her courage. "This kinda seems like a date."

"Really?" Spencer played dumb. "I don't really think so."

"I do," Ashley said, her eyes darting around the room again, as she got nervous. She could feel her heart rate picking up and her face burning from the inside out, but she had to ask this next question. She just had to know.

"You should just go ahead and ask me," Spencer told her, putting the fork down and leaning back. Waiting.

Ashley took a deep breath and gathered all the courage she could muster. "Okay. I guess what I'm trying to ask is, do you…*breath*, do you like girls?"

She could hear the clock tick falter and stop, as did her heart at that moment, as she waited with baited breath for Spencer's answer.

She kinda wanted to mutter "Oh God," and bury herself in the ground where she stood. But it was too late for all of that now; she was out on the limb. And it'd either hold under her weight or splinter and break, sending her plummeting back into the land of subjugated reality.

Spencer smirked wickedly, leaning even further back in her chair as she regarded Ashley. After a few intense moments she finally cleared her throat. "No."

Ashley's face kinda fell as she focused her eyes once again on her hands.

"No, I don't like girls."

Now she felt her stomach bottom out.

"I like you," Spencer admitted quietly, smiling when the girl's eyes leapt up to meet hers.

"But," Ashley started to say, then got stuck on the word. "But, but, but-"

"But what?" Spencer interrupted gently, quickly moving her chair around to sit closer to Ashley. She grabbed the other girl's shaking hand and held it between both of her own. "But what Ashley?"

Ashley stared into her eyes and kinda forgot what she was talking about in the first place, and when the blonde leaned forward to kiss her she totally forgot Spencer was a girl.


	20. WSPSH

**A/N: Hey guys, just dropping in to let you know that the poll will be closing soon and to remind you to please vote if you haven't. You can access the poll by clicking on my pen name. Thanks. Enjoy.**

Um...like R-ish, I think. So, stay away kiddies.

-----------

It started out like any other day.

Her alarm clock roused her from sleep, unfortunately the night before she'd left the dial on some oldies station so the first thing she heard when she woke up was James Brown wailing about feeling good.

Try waking up to that yell.

She showered and dressed for work, a little miffed that she'd forgotten to wash her favorite "Licalotapuss Foundation" t-shirt.

She had to settle for her second favorite: "Iamcrabbie & Abitch".

With a few minutes to spare she grabbed a bagel and a bottle of orange juice and was on her way.

It was such a nice day out, the sun was shining, the sky was blue, and the traffic was backed up for miles and miles.

Wait, scratch the record.

There goes her good day.

Needing a distraction, she finally turned on her radio.

"Good morning folks, this is Marty," _What the-_ "Sorry about the delay. We don't know where Jeb is but as soon as we find him we'll start the interview, but until then here's another classic from your friends at SPSH radio, where we play the Spash all the time." Silence. "Cue the music Edward," Marty growled and the song finally came on, the guys finally realizing to cut the microphone after about twenty seconds or so.

But, Spencer? She was freaking out.

Why was she freaking out?

Well, you see, she works for SPSH radio, an up and coming little production broadcasting from the heart of downtown L.A. And, today, the station was supposed to be getting its big break. Ashley Davies, scratch that, THE Ashley Davies had granted the little station a ten-minute interview, and Jeb was supposed to be doing it. And Jeb wasn't there so that meant-

She gasped. "One very pissed off rocker princess."

-----------

"Oh my God, Spencer," Marty, the producer, said, rushing over to her. "Where the hell have you been? We've been calling you like crazy."

Spencer reached in her pocket for her cell phone; her not present cell phone which was still sitting on the microwave back at her house unplugged and uncharged.

Something else she'd forgotten to do last night.

"Oops."

"Oops? Oops? The station's about to crash and burn and all you can say is oops?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Spencer, look. I'm just going to calm down and go into my office and see if I can get Miss Davies and her people to re-schedule,"

"Why don't you just interview her?" Spencer asked, confused.

"I asked. The girl's fine with it but her people," he rolled his eyes, which was all the explanation she needed. "You go in the control room and help Edward before he destroys everything."

She was about to turn into the small hallway when she collided with another body.

A warm body.

Guess who?

"Sorry. I'm sorry," Spencer said immediately, not really focused on anything except the chocolate donut stain now on the other person's shirt.

"No need to apologize. I knew this donut was gonna be trouble from the start."

The voice registered immediately. There was no mistaking that smoky, raspy voice eternally laced with a hint of amusement.

Her eyes bucked open as she gawked openly at the brunette, still wiping chocolate off her shirt. The other woman brought a chocolate covered index finger to her lips, sucking the icing off, only just registering the other woman's open admiration. "And I thought I was supposed to be watching my figure."

Spencer blushed at being caught, but managed to roll her eyes anyway. "I wasn't-"

"Uh- liars never prosper,"

"I thought that was beggars,"

"Not according to my new single," Ashley smiled, and it was adorable and sexy all at once. Something one wouldn't think was possible. But it is.

It so is.

"Well…" Spencer trailed off, her eyes finding the floor.

"Speaking of single," Ashley started, stepping into the blonde's personal space, trailing a finger down her arm.

"There you are," some guy in a suit said, walking up briskly to the pair. "Let's blow this dump. They don't even have an interviewer."

"Nah, I think I'm staying," Ashley said, locking eyes with Spencer. "And I want her to interview me."

"Her?" the guy asked.

"Me?" Spencer inquired.

"You."

-----------

"But Marty," Spencer pleaded, even as he was fitting the headphones on her head. "I've never been on air before. This has the potential to be a disaster."

"Look here Spencer. Miss Davies is hot right now. And if she's hot and she interviews on our station, that makes us hot by association. You following?"

Spencer nodded.

"Now, she said she'd do an interview, and she wants it with you, and what she wants she gets, understand?"

"But-"

"We're ready," Marty said into the microphone, giving the thumbs up to the brunette on the other side of the glass.

Ashley smiled back, seated with her headphones on, microphone at the ready, eyes solely on Spencer.

The blonde gulped.

She looked around the booth for a moment, almost jumping out of her chair when she heard the other woman's voice.

"Have you ever done this before?" Ashley inquired softly, her eyes conveying her concern.

Spencer smiled slightly, before shaking her head. "You'll be my first."

Ashley grinned, "Sweet. So, I'm popping your interview cherry,"

Spencer laughed slightly, a little embarrassed. "Something like that."

"Spencer, is it?"

"Mmmhmm,"

"Cool," Ashley said, smirking as the other woman squirmed in her seat a little bit. "Spencer?"

"Hmm?"

"Dig the shirt."

Spencer smiled widely as Marty began the countdown. "And we're on in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1..."

"Good afternoon Los Angeles. My name is Spencer Carlin, the time is now 1:30 P.M. and, as promised, we are sitting here with one of the music biz's hottest young celebrities: rocker princess, Ashley Davies," Spencer read from the card in her best radio voice. It was kind of over-the-top but that's how radio goes. "Good afternoon Ashley."

"Hello Spencer," Ashley replied, amused at the other woman's formal greeting.

"So, Ashley…wait, is it okay if I call you Ashley?" she asked.

Marty slapped his hand against his forehead.

"It's fine," the brunette chuckled, both at Marty's antics and at Spencer's cuteness.

"So, Ashley, your breakout album was a success. Each of your seven singles spending at least ten weeks at the top of the billboard charts. How do you plan to replicate that success the second time around?"

"I'll just continue what I'm doing. Write songs that come from the heart and that mean something to me, you know? I think that has a lot to do with it,"

"Yeah," Spencer replied, getting a little wowed and then shaking it off. "So, um-"

"What's on that question card there?" Ashley asked and Spencer looked up at her, confused.

"Go on," Ashley prompted.

"Just stuff about your new album, a couple about a few songs, and a few about (cough) your love life,"

"Ooh," Ashley said, sitting up. "Let's do those."

"O…kay," Spencer haltingly agreed after getting the green light from Marty. "Um, so the tabloids have had you linked up with everyone from Justin Timberlake to Paris Hilton. Any truth to any of that?"

"So, are you asking me if I'm dating anyone?" Ashley asked, solely for entertainment purposes. She wasn't that thick.

"I think so," Spencer said, a little perplexed at the oddly-constructed question herself. "But you don't have to answer if you don-"

"Nope. I'm not dating anyone, although there is someone I'm interested in at the moment…" Ashley left that comment open, begging for a question.

"Who?"

"You," Ashley answered simply.

Spencer's jaw dropped. "Me?"

"Now, can I ask you a few questions?" Ashley asked.

"Uh…sure,"

"Are _you_ seeing anyone?"

"No,"

"Really?," The rocker was thoroughly surprised by this information. "Okay good. Do you want to go out with me?"

She sounded odd, like she was nervous. "Like on a date?"

Ashley smiled. "That was the idea, yeah."

"Um…okay."

"You _do_ like girls, don't you?"

Spencer's cheeks were unbelievably red. "Yeah," Marty spoke up from the control room. "She's pretty gay."

He wasn't planning on interrupting; he just wanted to keep the conversation going. The phone was lighting up.

"Yeah," Spencer shrugged, not knowing what else to say.

But the brunette wasn't finished with her yet. "So, tell me something, Spencer, since we're talking and everything. What was your first kiss like?"

"With a girl, you mean?"

Ashley grinned. "Preferably."

Spencer rolled her eyes at the memory. "It was awful. God awful. And completely tacky. We were at some high school party and a bunch of people latched on to the idea of me and my best friend at the time, kissing. So we did, and she was really into it and I…wasn't. It wasn't that I didn't like Andrea, it's just I didn't feel comfortable in doing that in front of a lot of people," she said, her eyes clouding over slightly. "I don't know. That, technically, was my first kiss with a girl. I don't really count it though," she concluded with a shrug.

"Which one do you count?" Ashley asked, any pretense gone. She was genuinely interested and it showed.

"It was my senior year in high school and Jennifer, my first girlfriend, and I were just hanging out in my backyard, sharing a hammock. It was before I'd figured out I was gay and before she told me she was so we were awkward yet comfortable around each other, if there is such a thing," she chuckled softly, and Ashley merely raised an eyebrow. "It just kinda reminded me of…never mind. So we were just laying there and out of nowhere the sky just opened up and started sprinkling rain water on us. Not enough that we wanted to move, but enough to feel each and every drop as it landed on us. I started counting them, aloud. And Jen just started cracking up, like she did whenever I did something weird. And I was just about to turn to her and ask "what" when she leaned up quickly and pressed her lips to mine. I really expected her to pull away and I think she expected me to too. But I didn't. I held on and we kissed one another on that hammock in the rain. I remember it being soft and chaste but it still felt more amazing than any kiss I'd ever received from any boy. It was like…"

"Magic?" Ashley offered.

And Spencer remembered that she wasn't alone, and she wasn't sharing this story with one person. She was on the air. So, she shook herself out of her thoughts, clearing her throat. "That's one word for it. Isn't that a title for one of your songs?" Spencer asked, her brows furrowed.

Ashley gave her a soft smile and a gentle nod. "Off the first album. It Was Like Magic, although that's about another first."

Spencer nearly swallowed her tongue, all the blood in her body rushing to her face. She knew what that song was about.

Ashley released a rusty chuckle. "Don't worry blondie. We won't go there…yet."

Spencer was rendered speechless.

"Hey Marty, guys, you know what? I think I really want to take Spencer out now, so if it's okay with you, can we conclude this interview some other time?"

"Uh, yeah," Marty said, shrugging a little. It was impromptu, but what was he gonna do? Say no.

"Hey all you people out there in radio land, here's my new single, played exclusive on SPSH radio. And don't forget to check out the new album," Ashley introduced her own record, taking off the headphones and stuff immediately after. She gestured for Spencer to come with her.

"Wait, don't I need to change?" Spencer asked, even as the brunette tugged her along.

"Nah, you're good. I want you to come as you are," she told her, with a wink. "Oh, and pun totally intended."

-----------

"Here you go," Ashley said, handing Spencer a bottle of beer. "I, uh, asked them to bring up something a little more upscale and I could get you something to eat if you'd like."

"I'm um, this is fine," Spencer said, holding up the bottle a little.

"Okay," Ashley breathed out, plopping down on the sofa, next to Spencer. Well, not exactly next to her. You could probably fit a person between them.

A really big person.

Wearing a Barney suit.

"Why are you sitting waaay over there?" Ashley asked her, flashing a nose-crinkling smile.

"It's, uh…no reason," Spencer stuttered out, taking a hearty swig of the Corona before settling further into the corner of the couch she was occupying.

Ashley started sliding over, "What's the matter huh? You nervous?"

Spencer downed half the bottle before speaking. "I've never done this before."

Ashley paused her scooting. "I mean," Spencer quickly amended. "I've never gone home with a famous rock star before."

"Well," Ashley said, sliding closer as she spoke. "Technically, since I don't really live here, you still haven't."

"Right," Spencer managed to squeak out, finishing off the beer. Ashley slid her arm along the back of the couch as she moved in close to Spencer, invading her personal space.

"You know," she whispered as she started to lean in. "We don't have to do anything you don't want to. We can just talk about magical kisses in the rain."

Spencer swallowed. "And if I don't want to?"

Ashley was right in front of her now. They were so close their noses were touching, close enough for Spencer to decide that she liked Ashley's perfume.

"Don't want to talk about magic kisses?" Ashley asked, still close yet still keeping her distance, wanting Spencer to make that first move.

Spencer shook her head, the action brushing their noses together; an Eskimo kiss. "No, I meant, what if I want to do everything?" she whispered, her eyes on Ashley's at least until the brunette closed them.

"Spencer." Her voice came out as a choked whisper. "Can I…will y-"

And Spencer's lips were on hers.

The butterflies started almost immediately, but what Spencer didn't know was that they were even stronger on Ashley's end. The brunette was surprised by the reaction kissing Spencer caused.

She knew she'd been nervous around her, which was shocking, but she thought that it was just nervous energy. But this, this kiss, was definitely unlike any she'd ever experienced before, and it was only feather light at best.

Spencer felt herself go breathless; the air leaving her lungs the instant Ashley's lips touched hers. It was a lot of things all at once and it'd be a great disservice to try to describe it. But just as quickly as it started, it was over.

Spencer pulled back painfully slow, her eyes still shut. "That was-"

"Again," Ashley said, leaning in blindly, but Spencer was okay with that obviously.

She was the first to deepen it, dropping the beer bottle and placing her hands on Ashley's face. Ashley wrapped her arms around the blonde's waist pulling her over and onto her lap, Spencer's knees on either side of her thighs.

"I think," Ashley whispered in between kisses. "We should probably move this into the bedroom."

Spencer pulled away, her face displaying amusement as she brushed her fingers along Ashley's face. "Here's fine."

Ashley smiled, leaning into Spencer's caresses. "Oh, I know. I just don't want the wait staff walking in on us." Without another word she rose, taking Spencer with her, holding her up with ease.

"Impressive," Spencer appraised as Ashley carried her into the bedroom.

"You ain't seen nothin' yet."

-----------

She didn't know what possessed her to say yes.

When Ashley sat her down on her bed, stepped away and turned to her dresser to grab a scarf, her mind thought all kinds of things.

But when Ashley knelt in front of her, holding said scarf in her hands and asking, "Do you trust me?" eyes wide and caring, she found that she couldn't say no.

Instead, she nodded, and the brunette smiled at her, a bewitching smile: simply mesmerizing. But then it was gone, and she was cloaked in darkness.

Restricted to only four senses now, she concentrated on each of them. She ran her hands along the soft sheets, relishing in the satiny feel. She could smell Ashley's perfume, her scent all around her, encompassing her. Her tongue tasted of Ashley, a little beer, but the rest was all Ashley she was sure. But her ears perked up, as she heard a belt buckle being loosened, and the rustling a fabric, a zipper being pulled down, some more rustling.

And then finally she felt the bed dip behind her and Ashley's soft hands on her shoulders. She tensed momentarily, but relaxed soon after, even more when she heard Ashley's whispered, "It's okay".

She felt warm hands slide over her shoulders and down the front of her shirt, fingers ever so softly caressing, and then raking along her abdomen. Two more passes with her nails and Spencer was whimpering. Ashley was naked behind her she knew. She could feel the girl's breasts pressing into her back. In a second, Ashley shifted, moved completely away from her.

And in another second, Spencer sensed the brunette in front of her, peeling the material of her t-shirt away. A few more caresses and her bra went flying across the room. Flying for sure, because once the garment was slowly removed from her she heard it land a clear maybe seven feet away from them.

Just a guess.

She almost chuckled but then Ashley's hands were on her again, squeezing at newly revealed mounds of flesh, a whispered "wow" leaving the brunette's lips.

"What?" Spencer breathed out, a little unsure with what to do with her hands. She didn't want to just reach out and grab…well, she couldn't entirely go wrong, but there was still the off-chance she'd stick her finger up Ashley's nose. That minute possibility immobilized her.

"You're um," Ashley cleared her throat. "It's just, well, looks can be deceiving I guess," she giggled out, brushing her thumbs across Spencer's nipples, eliciting a gasp.

"Yeah…" Spencer murmured, forgetting all about what they were talking about. Her hands twitched at her sides, aching to do something.

"You want something Spencer?" the brunette drawled, close but still too far away for Spencer's liking. She knew she couldn't have been more than an arm's length away, but that was way too much ground to cover.

She nodded; her throat tight and not allowing her to speak. Moaning, though? Now, _that_ she could do. She afforded herself that luxury when Ashley's mouth replaced her hands.

"You like that?" Ashley teased, smiling against a breast.

She was closer now, and Spencer opened her still jean-clad legs wider. Ashley quickly removed them and her underwear with Spencer's assistance of course and when they were done, she wrapped her legs around Ashley's hips, her own starting the slow-grind immediately…

…and immediately feeling something extra pressing against her thigh.

"Uh,"

"You like?"

"I've um…never," Spencer said, a bit uncertain. It felt like it was pretty big.

"I won't hurt you," Ashley whispered against her lips before taking them. "I promise."

And she didn't.

…

…

But if she did it was only in the best way.


	21. Skin Deep

"How are you doing today Miss Carlin?"

Oh, joy. The woman with the brown eyes was back again.

Spencer squinted against the light and tried to speak but found she couldn't. The simple act of even thinking of opening her mouth made her wince from a phantom pain.

She was in the hospital, the burn unit, and she was one of the lucky ones.

There were a lot of people on that bus, crowded due to the time of day: rush hour. She was one of the last to get on at her stop and she was in the process of mentally cursing out the Starbucks cashier for taking so long to count out her change when the front doors of the bus were forced open.

A strong lad with greenish-blue eyes helped her aboard with a smile. Nice guy, that Noah, and smart. He knew that another bus wouldn't be coming for another half and hour and that would have been horrible considering it was Chicago, in February with a wind-chill of minus ten degrees.

Good times.

He was also very, very gay. But that just proved how very lucky Spencer was. She had the best gaydar of any gay person she knew, which usually meant she didn't have to waste her time. On gay men that is. She was definitely straight.

"Ashley's here," the nurse said, moving her pillow a little.

Or maybe not.

Ashley was also on the bus, near the front, just like her.

It took an instant, but that instant saved her.

Gay Noah turned out to be pretty boring. He was studying to be a meteorologist and his fascination with weather patterns was not contagious.

She was in the midst of yet another eye roll when she heard it.

The cutest little half-stifled chuckle she'd ever heard. Her eyes naturally gravitated to the sound and her eyes locked with the brunette.

The caught brunette.

Ashley's eyes widened a little but then they darted, towards a lone empty seat between two rather…large women. It was tight fit, but Spencer could do it.

So could Ashley, so why was she giving it up so easily? The other girl must have read this in her eyes, because she simply rolled them and nodded toward Noah.

Oh yeah, boring guy escapee. That's me.

And, aww, she's so thoughtful.

Spencer was very close to where the brunette was when the bus lurched painfully to the right rolling onto its side instantly. The screaming and startled gasps of the crowd of people all melded into one, like it does at sporting events sometimes.

But she managed to hear the raspy "Hey!" amidst it all, and she could still feel the ghost of her fingers clamped around her wrist.

The brunette was wheeled in right next to her on a bed. Ashley had faired better (or worse) depending on who you ask. Her burns were mostly on the lower part of her body, and her arms. Her face was relatively unscathed, her neck a little pink from a few minor burns.

But she still looked like her.

Spencer had no idea _what_ she looked like. And that was because of the bandages on her face. All she knew was that for now, it hurt to smile, or talk, so she didn't.

But Ashley did, and boy did it ever help.

"Do try and let her get some rest today Ashley," Nurse Candy said with an easy smile, knowing the request would fall upon deaf ears.

"I'll do my best," the brunette replied cheekily, rolling her chair ever closer to Spencer's bed. "Not making any promises though."

The nurse chuckled. "Somehow, I knew you would say that," she said, closing the door on her way out.

And now they were alone.

"Hey there, gorgeous girl," Ashley greeted softly, trailing her bandaged hand over Spencer's still perfect fingers. "You miss me?"

In answer Spencer moved her fingers through the other girl's, clasping their hands in a loose embrace.

"I'll take that as a yes," Ashley grinned, eyes fixed on the blue ones shining back at her. She brought Spencer's hand to her mouth, kissing the back of it ever so gently. "You should get some rest," she lamented, pulling away ever so slightly.

Spencer's eyes widened and she tugged on the hand still holding hers.

"Don't worry, gorgeous," Ashley grinned adorably. "I'll still be here when you wake up."

And she was there.

Ashley pretty much stayed by Spencer's side for two months. After about a week of constant visits, the hospital finally just went against protocol and allowed the girls to room together. It saved them the time of transferring Ashley from her bed to the chair and then back again. The whole routine in and of itself was a painful process for Ashley, but one she bravely endured.

It made her heart soar to see those pretty blue eyes.

They both had their respective slew of visitors. People they'd known before…just before.

It was always cordial at first, before the people they'd known their whole lives slowly morphed into strangers. Those same people with whom they used to consider themselves equal to now looked down upon them. Not purposefully of course, and not snidely, but the girls were different now, pitied.

And one never pity's their equal.

They pity their fallen equal.

But neither girl was really fallen, at least not in each other's eyes. Ashley was Spencer's angel, and that was what she called her when she finally could speak again. Again, it was her who felt the sting whenever she'd try to make words, but she endured it.

It was worth it every time to see Ashley's eyes light up.

"Where is your head at gorgeous?" Ashley asked her, sitting next to the girl in their, now, side by side hospital beds. The television was on but neither girl was watching, both too busy wrapped up in their own thoughts.

Spencer smiled; a few bandages had been removed from her face, giving her a new freedom.

The movement of her jaw: Oh, how she had missed it.

She still refused to look in the mirror though.

"Just that I hate this movie,"

Ashley finally grabbed the remote and read the info. _The English Patient_.

How sensitive.

"Yes," Ashley sighed, flicking off the screen. "They are very receptive at this hospital."

"I'll say," Spencer commented dryly, rolling her eyes, making Ashley chuckle. She glimpsed at the brunette and saw how the skin on her neck was healing magnificently. And how her hands, while still flaky and irritated looking were healing fine.

But she knew the same couldn't be said for her face, or else the bandages would be off, and she wouldn't feel so…so…

Ugly.

"Hey," Ashley called her out softly, spotting the dejection deep within those blue pools. "Where'd you go?"

"I'm right here, silly," Spencer tried to cover it up with a laugh. How pretentious of her. Didn't she know Ashley by now?

The brunette simply moved closer, crawling over the simple bar that separated their beds, or rather, made it easier to distinguish the fact that there were two beds. She brought a pink hand up and slowly brushed some of Spencer's unscathed blonde hair away from her face, ever mindful of the bandaging and where her fingers were pressing. "You look sad Spence."

The blonde's forced smile faded away, leaving the pain painted across her face. The emotion in her eyes so palpable Ashley would swear she could actually feel it.

"How do I look Ashley?" she asked timidly, her voice raw, her confidence even more so.

Ashley's smile couldn't have been more brilliant. "Now you know you're gorgeous-"

"No, Ashley," the blonde sighed in frustration. She didn't want to be placated. Not anymore. She needed the truth. "How do I _really_ look?"

Ashley stared into her eyes for the longest time before finally looking away. She let her eyes roam all over Spencer: all of her.

Her eyes trailed over the skin Spencer's baby tee revealed to her. They settled on the no doubt sensitive skin of her collar bone, the right side, because the fire had appeared to concentrate on the right. She slowly brought her hand up, watching Spencer's throat work as the blonde girl swallowed.

She lightly pressed her fingers against the side of Spencer's neck, her touch merely a whisper of skin on skin. "There's some scarring here," Ashley told her quietly, keeping her eyes on Spencer as she moved her fingers upward. "And your ear…it's reddish, like it's irritated," the brunette continued, swallowing against a dry throat. Her fingers carefully pulled back the bandaging on her friend's face, her eyes still with Spencer.

"There's a bit of light burns on your chin," she murmured, taking in the slightly rash-like skin on Spencer's chin, her thumb brushing against it softly. "It's healing nicely though," she told her, inspecting the site, her eyes finally coming to settle on the worst of it. She moved her fingers to the slightly hardened skin on the right side of Spencer's face; a wide series of scars that traveled from the base of her cheek to her right temple. "And then there's this one," Ashley said, her voice light to match her touch. "It's one of the worse ones," she told the other girl honestly, brushing her fingers along the surface of the discolored, puffy skin.

Ashley didn't look disgusted though. She didn't look as though she pitied her. As a matter of fact, her eyes sparkled magnificently as she smiled down at Spencer.

The blonde's eyes closed involuntarily and a single tear slipped out of her eye, barely breaching her eyelid before Ashley was gently brushing it away.

"What's wrong? I didn't hurt you, did I?" the brunette questioned, more than worried.

Spencer quickly shook her head. "It's just…when you touched it…the scar. I felt it."

The brunette was confused. "Felt what?"

"I felt…beautiful. The way you were…looking. I just…I don't know. Maybe I'm being stupid," the blonde said, looking away from Ashley.

"Spence?" Ashley asked and Spencer turned, her quiet "Hmm?" never seeing the light of day as she found herself being suddenly kissed…by Ashley obviously.

It was soft and gentle but still passionate enough to give life to a moan, sounding in the back of Spencer's throat.

Ashley smiled against her lips.

All too soon, though, it was over and Ashley was pulling away from her, her smile radiant.

Spencer couldn't help smiling back, which only made Ashley smile wider, giggling slightly. She cupped the other girl's cheek gently, "You're so beautiful."

"But I'm-" Ashley kissed her again to stop her senseless prattle before it started.

"So beautiful."

"_Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate, or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such." – __**Henry Miller**_

Ashley had the vision.

It was Spencer she had to teach to see.


	22. Red and Blue

**A/N: **It's that time again. Getting to know you time. This time I want you guys to tell me the best and worst thing you've ever done in life thus far. I'll kick it off, Best thing I ever did was cut loose those posers that called themselves my friends. Worst thing I ever did, go after my ex-girlfriend's girlfriend. Hands down - worst thing. Anyway, you guys keep 'em coming and I will too with the fic. It's interesting to have something to read you know because man, are there very little fics out there or what?

Thanks,

MGMK

--

**Red & Blue**

**Rating: **_**Uh...pool table teaser-smut**_

**Summary**: Treading dangerous territory...

* * *

Ashley pushed the blonde girl off of her, not _feeling_ it.

But then again, that was her problem lately. She just didn't feel it.

Going on the drug-runs, the big deals and hostile takeovers no longer had the appeal they once did.

The countless fights, the meaningless sex, all left her numb, longing for that next rush, whatever it would be.

That thing that would make her heart accelerate to heart attack intensity.

She craved those moments when she'd be stuck somewhere between euphoria and ecstasy, stuck so good she wasn't even sure she was still alive.

She sighed, even as the attractive blonde tried to persuade her back into bed. It was pointless.

Deciding she'd had more than enough of "this" she quickly got dressed, throwing on some jeans and a red sweatshirt. She made sure to tie her red bandana around her head, just in case she got into trouble along the way.

Not an unlikely event as trouble always seemed to find Miss Davies.

The bandana let it be known loud and clear who she rep'd for.

Ashley Davies was a Blood for Life.

**--**

Spencer focused on the cue ball in front of her, tuning out everything else around her, including the crip-walking contest, the pending fight at the air hockey table, and the bar fight at the (gasp) bar.

"Would you just take the damn shot already Carlin?" Marco, her best friend turned – she suspected – weed head.

The pot had practically obliterated any patience the guy had and he was paranoid as hell.

_Such a shame_, she thought, shaking her head. _He had so much potential. Goes to show you. Kids, don't do [too much] drugs._

She finally hit the cue ball, knocking the eight of the four sides before it glided perfectly into the corner pocket.

"Damn it," Marco yelled, fishing around in his pockets for the cash but she waved him off.

"Just get me some fries or something," she told him, sitting down on one of the bar stools.

She took a look around at her surroundings, finding nothing incredibly spectacular. There was blue for miles as this was Crip territory. But, it was always the same old bullshit, everyday. They'd just spend hours doing absolutely nothing, and no one seemed to desire doing anything else. And as a beer bottle barely missed her head, she wondered if any of it was even worth it.

She could always tell her big brother to go fuck himself and leave, go to college like she always wanted. This whole "shoot 'em up, gang bang" was getting old and she totally needed a change of scenery.

Maybe she'd move to the Bay area and find her mother.

"Hey," she told Marco, once he'd returned with the fries. "I'm taking this to go. Tell Glen I went to get a pack of smokes and went home."

"Alright," Marco said, even though he knew that she knew he'd forget. "Call me if you need me."

"Yeah."

**--**

She didn't know why she'd driven so far.

Most likely, it was because she didn't want to run into anybody she knew.

But she was really living dangerous now. Driving through Crip territory was definitely when you were a well-known Blood is practically suicide.

But Ashley was about to get touched by an angel…well, her car was.

The light turned green, and since she was distracted she didn't see the person in the crosswalk. But the person saw her, slamming their hands on the hood of her car.

"Hey!" Spencer barked out. "I'm walking here!"

She glared at the girl sitting inside the 1972 Cutlass, a fixer-upper in progress.

"Whatever!" Ashley yelled back. "Your ass almost put a dent in my car!"

"Probably an improvement," Spencer shot back, resuming her walk across the street with a huff only to stumble backwards as Ashley loudly revved the engine.

The blonde looked wide-eyed into the windshield, only to see the brunette inside quaking with laughter. Ashley was still snickering like a madwoman when she felt two hands grasp the front of her sweatshirt and not in the good way.

She looked down at the small hands fisting her shirt and then up at blue eyes blazing with anger. "Can't keep your hands off me, huh?" she smirked.

Spencer let go immediately.

"Hardly. You're lucky I don't kick your ass right here and now. Don't think I don't know who you are,"

"Okay, first of all, do not think for one second that you could kick _my_ ass. And, if you knew who I was then why haven't you flagged down one of your peeps?"

"Uh, I don't need 'em,"

"What?!"

"You heard me bitch. Get out of the car," Spencer yelled, calling the brunette out.

Ashley looked at her, annoyed then amused by the frown the blonde was sporting. Her game face purportedly but it looked more like an exaggerated pout.

Her lips formed a smug smirk. "No."

"No?"

"You should get in the car," Ashley said, unlocking the doors slyly.

Spencer's eyebrows rose. "I should?"

"Are you a parrot?"

"Shut up," Spencer grunted, rolling her eyes, still hesitant.

"I won't hurt you," Ashley said, wiggling her eyebrows.

"You'd better not." Spencer finally walked around to the passenger side, tugging on the handle, but only being able to open it if she leaned all her weight back on it.

"Sorry about that," Ashley giggled, watching the blonde struggle with the door. "Monroe's kind of a work in progress."

"Monroe as in…"

"Marilyn," Ashley winked, flooring it. "I kind of have a thing for blondes."

**--**

"Un-fucking-believable," Spencer cursed, stepping into the seemingly abandoned building with Ashley. "And no one knows about it?"

"Nope," Ashley told her, brushing another sliding panel aside. "This is my own personal oasis."

Her own personal oasis was a couple of apartment rooms, conveniently conjoined. Ashley had turned the place into kind of a home away from home, complete with a bed, a couple of other necessary pieces of furniture, a compact refrigerator, and an array of other items.

"A pool table and everything," Spencer muttered, walking over to the felt covered table and running her hands across it. "Can we play?"

"Only if house rules apply," Ashley informed her, grabbing a couple of billiard cues from the rack as Spencer set the break.

"And what are house rules?" she asked her, still distracted and Ashley took the opportunity to position herself directly behind her, deftly placing them back to front.

Spencer stood upright, immediately aware of the body behind her. Ashley took one of the cues and placed it in front of both of them, slipping it between them and the table, and, in effect, between Spencer's legs, leaving it standing there as she relayed the house rules.

"First rule: blonde's go first," she murmured out, taking Spencer's right hand and placing it on the cue, her touch light. "Second, we play for clothes."

She stepped away at that moment, leaving the blonde bleary-eyed and remiss…until she remembered she was straight.

"Say what now?" she squeaked out, not a chicken or anything…but getting naked…with a stranger – no, strange girl? Out of the question.

"C'mon now, Spencer," Ashley teased. "You can't be that thick. I score…you strip. You somehow manage to hit in a few, I drop something. Trick shots get double."

Hold on.

Time-out.

Did she just insinuate that Spencer was somehow _bad_ at pool?

I think Spencer's bad side just kicked in. "You're going down Davies."

Ashley merely smirked. "Totally."

**--**

One break and three shots later, Ashley was shaking in her boots…literally.

Spencer with a trick shot from hell called the spider shot (which I lost 100 bucks on one time) had all but cleared the table and she only had two more shots before Ashley would be completely naked, down to only her thong…well, I guess she was technically completely naked.

Spencer's cheeks would burn every time she caught a glimpse of bronzed skin, glistening in the moonlight filtering in through the boarded up windows and it would probably help if Ashley'd stop moving so much. Spencer didn't want to look, but it was too tempting. Something in her belly kept making her eyes gravitate to her nemesis, and that same something was making it hard to look away.

She cleared her throat, averting her eyes as she sensed the brunette's eyes on her. "Eight ball, corner pocket," Spencer stuttered out and Ashley smiled smugly.

She was definitely getting to her.

Spencer walked around the table, strategizing her last shot. She could miss the shot purposely thereby allowing Ashley to take her turns, even some ground.

But she wasn't stupid. She knew what Ashley had in mind and, frankly, at this point, she had begun to anticipate it. She wanted to know what it would be like to have Ashley touch her in more purposeful ways…caress her as she'd caressed her own pool stick. She could always write off anything they did tonight as an experiment, seeing as after tonight they'd have to forget each other anyway. Rival gang members could not associate with each other…not unless they were super famous like Snoop Dogg and the Game. Plus, she'd never thrown a game in her life, except that one time with her baby cousin Michelle, but it was too cute watching the little girl's eyes light up once she'd found out she was victorious.

So worth it.

"You takin' the shot or what?" Ashley asked her, crossing her arms against her naked chest and Spencer's eyes shot to her in reaction, and she blushed, immediately regretting the decision.

Without a second's irritation and because Ashley quietly chuckling at her embarrassment spurred her on, Spencer reared back and poked the eight ball, glancing it off the left wall to change direction and sending it straight toward the corner pocket. Clack!

"Game," she said, bravely lifting her eyes to find Ashley's.

"Nice," was Ashley's one word response, her arms still crossed, and then gradually with Spencer's eyes still on her she lowered them…and then the thong.

Gulp.

Spencer tried to keep it cool as the brunette approached her, nervously passing the pool cue from one hand to another.

Ashley's had long since been returned to the rack. She knew she wouldn't need it.

Spencer's eyes found the floor again, nearly falling out of her head when she saw bare toes work their way into the picture.

Ashley was standing right in front of her.

"First time?" Ashley asked, forcing the pool cue from her grasp.

Spencer scoffed. "As if."

"With a girl I meant," Ashley clarified, still keeping a little distance between them as she threw the cue aside.

"Um…" Spencer trailed off…not wanting to admit anything.

"It's okay if it is," Ashley told her, finally reaching out a hand to left the blonde's face, finger gently tilting a chin upward. "It's okay if this is your last time too. I've always wanted to be someone's only. I'd kill for it to be someone as beautiful as you." Her fingers shifted so that now her hand was cupping a cheek, brushing her thumb along a cheekbone. She watched as Spencer's eyes clouded over, her eyelids getting heavy.

"What do you think Spencer," she asked her, moving forward ever so slightly, slowly leaning in. "Do you think I can be your only?"

Without an answer she leaned in and kissed her, feeling Spencer lean into her immediately. But the kiss wasn't rushed or sloppy. It was warm and tender and so not what she expected.

It was much better.

After several moments, Ashley pulled away, smiling brightly as Spencer instinctively leaned forward, expecting more.

"Can I?" the brunette asked, her voice a little shaky. She wouldn't think about it then, but she'd admit later…much later, that yes, Spencer had gotten under her skin. She leaned up and pecked Spencer on the nose, making the other girl smile with eyes still closed.

Spencer didn't say anything though, she just leaned forward and initiated another kiss, a deeper one; a long, slow, languid, wet one.

One that ignited a fire deep within their bellies which would not be extinguished that night or any others to follow.

That's the kind of blaze that burned for eternity.

But they didn't know that.

They only thought they had tonight.

So in true live in the moment nature, they did what came naturally and seized the day…on the pool table.

It didn't take long for Spencer to lose the sweatshirt.

Ashley smoothed her hands down her arms, the blonde's body responding to the touch by exploding in goosebumps; The sensation alone pleasurable enough to send a series of tingles down her spine, settling deep in her belly.

Ashley's lips broke away from her own, making the girl whimper in frustration only to moan in appreciation a half second later when those lips found the sensitive areas of her neck, Ashley's hands and nails raking across her naked torso, naked because her tank top had ridden higher, or was pushed higher. There was really no telling.

Soon, the shirt was gone and Spencer found Ashley's body insistent against hers, lips and teeth and tongue all working to drive her crazy and she was almost there, almost driven to the point of absolute delirium and Ashley had yet to touch her anywhere that mattered. She'd yet to mark her body with any touch that could be considered illicit or explicit.

Until now.

Now she was pushing the girl onto the pool table, lifting her up slightly with two strong arms before settling her on the ledge. And then her mouth went to work again, only lower this time, teasing and taunting already sensitive flesh, making the blonde writhe in agony. Blissful agony.

All too soon, but not soon enough, Spencer felt her belt buckle being worked free from its moors, she felt her zipper being pulled down, and she felt the cool night air as it contrasted with the heat coming off of her (their) bodies in waves. But she didn't care about all that. What she longed for she waited for with baited breath, barely able to see Ashley now that the room had darkened so.

Naked now, she heard more than she saw Ashley as the girl maneuvered them completely onto the table. "Sit back," she told her, her breaths harsh and her voice husky. She pressed the whole of her body against Spencer as she lay down on top of the girl, on top of the pool table.

"Are you wet Spencer?" she asked, her fingers barely trailing the waistband of Spencer's underwear. It was a ridiculous question really as there was no mistaking the wet trail on her naked thigh that she had pressed between Spencer's legs. "Do you want me?" she asked, pressing a kiss to the corner of Spencer's mouth.

Spencer swallowed hard, wondering exactly what it was the brunette was doing to her. She'd never been more turned on in her life and by what, a few kisses. Still, she only nodded, the power of speech beyond her.

"I can't hear you," Ashley whispered, trailing her fingers lower, then snapping the band against Spencer, delighting in the slight gasp she received for her efforts.

"I want you," Spencer whispered, stuttered out, her lower body moving against Ashley in a blatant attempt to show her exactly what she wanted.

But Ashley had other plans, or maybe they were the same as she slid her lithe body down the trembling girl's. Trembling in anticipation.

She felt Ashley's hands drag her underwear down, and she nearly kicked them off as they reached her feet, turned on beyond belief. She didn't think it could get any better.

Boy, was she wrong.

She hissed in a quick breath when Ashley's mouth first touched her, caressing her intimately and she heard and felt the brunette chuckle. A deep one that sent shivers from her head to her toes. "If I'm gonna be your only," she murmured, taking a moment to make Spencer make that sound again. "I'm gonna be your best only."

Somehow, Spencer didn't doubt that.

And she ended up with the felt burns to prove it.


	23. Ten Items or Less

**A/N: **It's that time again. Getting to know you time. This time I want you guys to tell me the best and worst thing you've ever done in life thus far. I'll kick it off, Best thing I ever did was cut loose those posers that called themselves my friends. Worst thing I ever did, go after my ex-girlfriend's girlfriend. Hands down - worst thing. Anyway, you guys keep 'em coming and I will too with the fic. It's interesting to have something to read you know because man, are there very little fics out there or what?

Thanks,

MGMK

--

"Ooh, Spence, let's get cupcakes," the boy squealed, tugging on her arm.

She rolled her eyes. "Seriously, I don't even know why I bother taking you on these runs with me sometimes. My grocery bill almost always doubles."

"It's because you love me," Aiden deadpanned, tossing the chocolate frosted, crème filled deserts into their basket.

"Yeah, that just has to be it," Spencer said sarcastically, eyeing a case of soda and then Aiden.

"Or maybe it's because I do all the heavy lifting," he amended, easily lifting the soda into the cart.

"I think we have a winner," she said, giving him a little smirk. "I think we have all the essentials; junk, junk, and more junk. Maybe we should get the extraneous stuff now."

"Yeah, like fruit," Aiden offered.

"And maybe milk," she added, but as they rounded the corner, they almost crashed head on with one of the store employees.

Seems she was moving an abandoned cart out of the way.

But, that didn't hold Aiden's interest for long. After the initial shock of the almost hit wore off he found himself the third party in a staring contest as Spencer and the mystery girl could not take their eyes off of one another.

"I'm…sorry," Spencer said, still barely aware that the accident had even taken place.

"No, that was all me," the other girl said, shaking her head and making her brunette curls bounce. "I wasn't looking-"

"Me either," Spencer interrupted. "I was kind of distracted."

"Well, look," the brunette said, a smile finally breaking free on her face. "No harm no foul right?"

"Yeah," Spencer smiled. "Right."

"Okay,"

"Yeah,"

"Bye then,"

"Uh huh, bye,"

The girl pushed her cart away never once looking back. A good thing she didn't because she will have certainly caught Spencer staring at her, and then the blonde would have turned as red as a tomato and run out of the store.

As it was, things were going to progress naturally; or, as natural as they could with Aiden's interference.

Spencer was still watching the girl walk away when the sound of a voice clearing made her jump sky high…almost.

"What are you doing?" Aiden asked her, a small grin playing on his face.

"Nothing," she answered quickly, her voice sounding foreign.

"Oh. Right," he nodded, following her as she slowly guided the cart to the produce section. "So, since when is staring at some girl considered nothing?"

"I wasn't staring," Spencer snapped.

"Okay, then. So, when is looking fixedly at some girl considered nothing?" he asked again, holding up his hand before she could refute it for a second time. "And I saw you so you can't say you weren't. Besides, she was staring at you too."

"You think?" Spencer asked, stopping the cart.

Aiden chuckled. "You're so obvious Spencer."

"Ugh. Shut up and get some fruit," she grumbled, pushing past him again.

Aiden smirked as he spotted the fruit displays. Each and every piece carefully stacked and arranged on top of one another. If someone were to sabotage one of those things, there would surely have to be a clean up and I wonder who would do that job.

Hmmm…

--

"Aiden!" Spencer squealed, stepping over apple after apple. "What the hell is your problem? You couldn't take one from the top?"

"I wanted this one," he said, shrugging casually.

Her eyes just widened as she stared at him, until the sound of another voice broke through.

"Oh man," the brunette said, looking around at the spilled fruit.

"I'm sorry," Spencer felt compelled to say…again.

"No worries." The other girl smiled when she saw who had been the source of the problem. "You can help me pick these up though," the brunette smirked, raising a lone eyebrow.

Spencer pointed back at Aiden. "Well, actually it was hi-" she started until a quick kick to her rear end shut her up. "I mean, sure."

"I'm gonna go get some more chips Spence. I'll be right back," Aiden said, winking at her so very non-discreetly.

She just shook her head before dropping to her knees and assisting the girl.

"Sorry about…him. They dropped him on his head a few times. Not when he was a baby though. Recently," she said, grabbing a few scattered apples.

"I see," the girl giggled, taking the apples from Spencer and tossing them into a cardboard box. "So…Spence, is it?"

"Yeah, short for Spencer," she replied, still focused on the apples.

"I like that," the other girl said, watching with interest as Spencer froze for a moment. "I'm Ashley by the way."

"Nice to meet you Ashley," the blonde smiled, finally looking up.

"Right back at ya' Spencer," the brunette grinned, reaching for another apple.

Their hands settled on the same one, at the same time, causing their fingers to brush against one another. Spencer blushed and Ashley bit back a smile as Spencer hastily withdrew her hand, clearing her throat in the process.

"So, is that guy your boyfriend?" Ashley asked, as she now focused on the apples.

Spencer fought back a loud snicker. "No way. Aiden's more like family than anything. He's my best friend."

"He's cute," Ashley offered and Spencer's color drained from her face.

"I guess so," she responded, not really caring to go into details.

"Not your type huh?" Ashley asked, with the pretense of being vague.

"You could say that," Spencer said, grunting slightly as she pushed herself back into a standing position. She handed Ashley the single apple she had, their fingers not so innocently brushing against one another. Without another word, however, she walked away, leaving a smirking Ashley alone with the apples.

The other girl stood, tossing that apple up in the air, still looking after the blonde.

She'd just have to see how this played out.

--

Spencer found Aiden in the frozen food section, checking out the ice cream.

"Ooh, get some popsicles," she said, over his shoulder, making him nearly drop the frozen novelties.

"What are you doing back here?" he asked her, his face awash in concern. "Do not tell me you blew it already."

"What?" she asked, confuzzled.

"I left you with the brunette. The hot brunette and you weren't supposed to be meeting up with me until I got to the dairy," he hissed, pulling her into a quiet corner.

"We…talked," Spencer trailed off in a smile, but shook her head after. "I don't think she's that into me."

"Oh my God, Spencer," Aiden squealed, incredulous. "You are such a retard. Here, c'mere," he said, before subtly (read – forcefully) pushing her into a woman who was walking down the aisle.

With two cartons of eggs.

"Aiden?!"

"Oops," he said, smiling sweetly and then smirking when a certain brunette turned up at the far end of the aisle. "Thank me later," he whispered, walking away.

"Huh?" Spencer looked confused, that is until a warm voice sounded behind her. Warm and amused. "We meet again."

Spencer spun on her heel, just barely glimpsing the brunette before falling down on her ass.

The floor _was_ covered with egg.

--

"You're kind of a walking disaster, you know that blondie," Ashley said, pulling some eggshell out of the girl's hair.

They were in the employee's restroom, cleaning Spencer off as best they could.

"Yeah, well, that lady should have had a cart," Spencer mumbled, still miffed at Aiden for doing this to her.

She kind of forgot about all of that when Ashley tugged on her pouting lower lip. "Yeah, well, you should be more careful. Wouldn't want that pretty face of yours to get all broken."

Spencer's lips unwittingly turn up. "Who says I have a pretty face?" she asks, slyly.

Now Ashley smiled. "Some people…I guess,"

"Oh, you guess?" Spencer repeated, leaning into Ashley.

"Yeah," Ashley murmured, glancing down at the other girl's lips.

But just before they were about to lean in, the door flew open, a co-worker running in complaining about egg salad.

They cleared that restroom pretty quickly.

--

"Heard about your accident Spence," Aiden smiled, as she slowly approached him. "That's too bad."

"You asshole. I had egg on my ass because of you," she grumbled, shoving him playfully.

"Whatever. Did you get that girl's number?"

"No, Aiden," she said, her voice sounding playfully weary. "You can't force these things."

Aiden just looked at her.

"Okay, you know what? Screw this. You can NOT be left to your own devices," he said, tugging her arm. "Come on."

"What? Are you gonna throw me into another display or something?"

"No, I'm gonna go get you some," he said, pulling her towards the check out lanes.

--

Aiden loaded their things onto the conveyor belt and waited until it was she and his turn at the register.

The register manned by Ashley.

"We have to stop meeting like this," the girl said, scanning some of their items. Spencer smiled brilliantly, almost chucking.

"I agree," Aiden said, nudging Spencer in front of him. "I think you should just check her out."

Ashley paused mid-scan. "You want me to…check her out?"

"Yeah, because she hasn't been…checked out, in a while," he said, making a face at Spencer when she turned to glare/gawk at him.

"How about I check her out in about forty minutes? It's my lunch break," Ashley offered, resuming her scanning but keeping her eyes on Spencer.

"That sounds like a plan," the blonde said, nodding affirmatively.

"Good," Ashley said.

"Great," Spencer replied.

"Marvelous," Ashley added.

"Super," Spencer fired back.

"Okay, cut it out," Aiden interrupted. "They'll be plenty of time for that later."


	24. Lean On Me

The cold, sticky wood of the bar caressed her skin. The woman was slumped over the edge, her fingers wrapped around a tiny glass. It was empty; she had downed the contents in ten seconds flat. It wasn't necessarily a record, although it might be for someone else, it wasn't for her. In fact, it was quite slow.

She'd spent the last few years in this bar, in the same seat, ordering the same drink. She could always order something different, she could sit in a different seat, and she could even go to a different bar. But she didn't. This was her routine; this was _hers_, not anyone else's. It was her rock, her constant in life.

"Kat," she whispered, her face still buried in her elbow. She expected a warm hand to take the glass from her own and replace it with another one. When that didn't happen, she brought her head up to take in her surroundings. "Kat!" she slurred loudly.

The blonde bartender wiped the counter with a rag. "Yes, Spencer?"

Spencer slowly blinked a few times before catching the other blonde's eyes. "'nother drink," she slurred slowly. She was way past drunk, but she didn't care. She could just feel all her problems drifting away.

"I'm cutting you off, Spencer." Kat ran her towel on the wood again as she grabbed the glass from Spencer's hands. "You've had enough for tonight."

"Juss one more." Spencer reached for the glass, only to slap her hand on the counter below her arms.

Kat shook her head and stared at the drunken woman. "Spencer, I'm calling someone to come get you. Stay right here."

"No!" Spencer shouted. She sat up slowly and gripped the edge of the counter, steadying herself to stand up. "I can do myself."

"Spencer, stay," Kat demanded, reaching over and wrapping her fingers around the blonde's wrist. "I'll be right back."

Spencer watched as Kat walked into a back room. She swirled around on her stool, getting dizzier by the moment. Her feet hit the floor beneath the stool as she stood up. The room seemed to spin around her. If it hadn't been for the stool behind her, she would have surely fallen. She almost did, but a warm hand held her up.

"Leggo," Spencer demanded as menacingly as she could. It was more of a weak command just barely above a whisper.

"Let's just sit you down." The warm hand turned into a warm body that gently pushed Spencer back down onto the stool.

Spencer groaned and reluctantly sat down. "No. Go home."

The warm hands found the small of Spencer's back and steadied the blonde. "You're not going anywhere just yet. We have to make sure you can walk first."

"No!" Spencer protested. She tried to stand up only to be thwarted by the hands on her hips that were holding her firmly in place.

After a few more attempts to get up, Spencer finally relaxed in the arms around her. She let her eyes rake the body in front of her. Brown, curly hair. Breasts. Chocolate brown eyes. Breasts. Great body. Breasts.

"Hey, blondie," the brunette woman whispered. Her hand moved from Spencer's waist to her chin, lifting it so their eyes met. "My eyes are up here."

Spencer smirked, letting her eyes drift down. "I like you."

"But you don't know me," the brunette whispered in Spencer's ear, sending shivers down the woman's spine. "And I don't know you."

"Then let me get to know you," Spencer rasped out. She brought her hands up and cupped the brunette's face. She leaned forward as she pulled the woman closer, their lips colliding.

The kiss was over just as fast as it started. The brunette pulled away quickly. Spencer didn't know what to expect, but not being pulled away from. No one has pulled away from one of her kisses before. Ever.

"What the hell is this?!" A voice bellowed from behind the brunette and Spencer knew why the woman pulled away. It was her brother, Glen. "Who the hell are you and why are you are you taking advantage of my sister?!"

The brunette's face turned bright red. "This um…this so isn't what it looks like." She stuck her tongue out and licked her lips. They tasted of strawberry lip gloss.

"Well it looks like you were kissing my sister!" Glen screeched. He walked toward the girls and picked Spencer up from the stool and from the brunette's grasp. "Can you not see that she's drunk? Or is this how you get your jollies?"

"Okay, first of all. I was making sure that she didn't get into any trouble. And second, she was the one that kissed me,"

"And I'm supposed to believe that?" Glen scoffed when the woman nodded her head enthusiastically. "Your hands were all over her."

"I was keeping her on the stool. Don't you see how drunk she is? She can't even sit upright," the brunette growled back.

Glen rolled his eyes at the woman. "Whatever," he breathed out. He started to drag Spencer out of the bar. Just like every other week. Only this time, it was different, Spencer was lighter than normal. He looked over to see the brunette with her arms around Spencer's waist.

"Told you that I didn't do all that," the woman smirked at Glen. The walk to the car was silent. Well, save for the groans and moans coming from Spencer.

Glen opened the back door and gently laid Spencer onto the seat. "So who are you?" he asked, turning to the mystery helper.

"Ashley Davies." The brunette wiped her hands on her pants before sticking one out to shake Glen's hand. "And you are?"

"Glen Carlin." Glen shook Ashley's hand. His eyes moved from hers to his sister, passed out in the backseat. "Sorry about accusing you, with all that, before."

Ashley smiled softly, her gaze following Glen's. "It's no problem. Look," she cleared her throat and waited for Glen to make eye-contact with her again. "I umm…I'm a sponsor. And I would like to sponsor you sister."

"You mean like, pay her money and give her stuff like that?" Glen asked, a little naïvely. "I don't think that she should have one. I mean, look at what she does with her money now. Imagine what she'd do with the extra stuff.

Ashley gave an uneasy chuckle. "No. Uh, not that kind of sponsor. Different one."

"Then what?" Glen leaned up against his car, the door now closed on Spencer. He crossed his arms and stared at the smaller brunette woman.

"Well, I'm the kind of sponsor that spends time with an alcoholic. You know, couple days every week, or whenever they want to, or need to. I help encourage them to not drink so that they can beat the addiction," Ashley replied quickly and effortlessly.

Glen blinked slowly a few times, his mouth opening and closing every now and then as if he wanted to say something, but thought better of it.

"What do you think, Glen? Do you think that she'd go for that?" Ashley asked, a little hopeful.

"Look, Ashley, I know you mean well, but Spencer's different. Probably a lot more different than anything else you've come across before," Glen said, rubbing his neck. A nervous habit.

"You mean that she's stubborn? Trust me; I've had my fair share of stubborn people throughout this whole thing. Almost everyone is in some way or another," Ashley joked; she rested her hands on her hips and laughed a little.

Glen let out a soft sigh. "That's not what I mean, Ashley." He let his eyes travel to the gum-covered ground instead of looking the brunette in the eye. "Spencer she…she likes girls."

"Oh," Ashley said softly, a little shocked at the revelation. "So the kiss from before, wasn't just because she's drunk?"

"Oh, that was because she's drunk. No doubt about that," Glen said, laughing softly. "But she probably would have done it if she was sober, too."

Ashley raised an eyebrow at the blonde, curly-haired man in front of her. "And you say that because…"

Glen rolled his eyes. "Just give me your stuff and I'll make sure Spencer calls you tomorrow for a meeting."

"Alright," Ashley sighed, not one to press insistently. Only just enough. She reached into her purse for a pen and piece of paper. When she found it, she wrote down her number for Glen. "My phone's always open, so tell her to call whenever."

Glen nodded his head. "Will do." And with that, he pushed off from the car and walked around to the driver's seat. "I'll be seeing you, Ashley."

"See ya, Glen." Ashley gave a little wave at the man before he closed the door and drove off.

"No way, Glen. I am not doing any of that," Spencer hissed, she pushed past him and into the kitchen. "I just need my food and I'll be good."

Glen grabbed Spencer's wrist. "Spencer, this will be good for you."

"No, Glen, it'll be good for you," Spencer shot back. "Because you don't like what I do every other night, you want to 'cure' me. There's nothing wrong with me, Glen. Nothing wrong." She stuck her hands out, "Do you see anything wrong?"

"No," Glen sneered. "But Spence, you–"

Spencer shook her head. "I am not calling some stranger to help me with a problem that I don't have. There's no reason to." She turned and reached into the cupboard and grabbed a bag of Oreos™ and a jar of peanut butter. "So just leave me alone about it, and we'll all be fine."

Glen watched as she stormed out of the kitchen and into the living room to watch a movie. He thought for a moment on what to do. He could call Ashley himself and have her come over to straighten Spencer out (no pun). Or he could wait until Spencer wanted to do it herself.

"Like that would happen," he murmured aloud, picking up the phone and dialing Ashley's number. "Is Ashley there? Hey, yeah, it's me Glen. Um, do you think that you could come over now and hang out with Spence? I think she needs you." A smirk crept onto Glen's lips. "Great. See you soon."

Glen looked down at his watch. Just a few minutes until Ashley would get there.

Finally, they could actually talk about Spencer's problem. "Hey Spence, I'm gonna go take a shower."

Spencer furrowed her eyebrows together. "Yeah, sure." She looked over at her brother. "What's gotten into you?"

"Oh, nothing's gotten into me," Glen smiled brightly and…oddly.

"Did you finally get laid or something?" Spencer joked, poking the man in the side.

"No," Glen's face dropped. "Thanks, Spence. Just, thanks." He stood up and exited the room.

Spencer shook her head. "Touchy, touchy." She leaned back and got comfortable on the couch with her Oreos™ and peanut butter.

Just as soon as she stuck the third cookie into her mouth, the doorbell rang. "Who the hell could that be?" She set the food onto the coffee table before making her way to the door. As quickly as she opened it, the door was closed again. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"So you remember me?" The person asked through the door.

"Vaguely." Spencer's face flushed furiously. "Look, I'm not drunk and I'm not interested in anything you might want to do right now."

"So talking's out of the question?"

Spencer's jaw dropped. That was certainly unexpected. "If that's all that you want to do, I guess I could grant you that request." She opened the door again and came face-to-face with the woman from the night before.

"Ashley." The brunette stuck her hand out to take Spencer's into her own.

"Yeah, I'm Spencer," Spencer said, shaking Ashley's hand.

Ashley smirked. "I know." When she saw a confused expression on the blonde's face, she chuckled softly. "Your brother called me."

"Glen," Spencer growled. "Look, I don't know what he told you, but I don't have a problem. And I don't need you to fix me."

Ashley held up her hands in surrender. "I just want to talk."

Spencer eyed the brunette, trying to figure out her intentions. But as much as she wanted to shoo the woman away, she just couldn't. "Come on in." She moved over to let Ashley in and watched as she walked by.

"So then, Glen takes the edge of his pants and pulls them down, along with his underwear, and runs around the neighborhood stark naked." The women clutched their stomach in a fit of laughter.

Spencer let out a loud snort, causing more laughter to fill the room. When it died down, Ashley took a sip of her water and stared at Spencer. "Mom and Dad had to bribe him with video games for him to come back inside."

"You haven't mentioned them much," Ashley pointed out. "Why's that?"

Spencer visibly tensed. "They uh, I don't want to talk about them." She brought her glass up to her lips and took a large drink.

Ashley scooted closer on the couch and set her hand on Spencer's knee. "It's okay to talk about them, Spence."

"They um," Spencer cleared her throat. "They died three years ago."

"Oh. I'm sorry, Spence. It's hard,"

"Harder than you can imagine," Spencer chuckled softly. "I remember the day. I was in psychology class in college. My phone rang and it was Glen. He was in hysterics. I uh, asked what happened. And he told me. He told me Mom and Dad had been in some crash. I don't remember what it was, but I know that I hung up the phone and ran. I ran so hard, so fast, away from everything."

Ashley moved her hand from Spencer's knee and wrapped it around the blonde's shoulders, pulling her into a hug. "It's okay, Spence."

Spencer shook her head and quietly cried into Ashley's embrace. She sniffled, "I ended up in the bar, the one you found me at. And I just drank. I drank until I couldn't feel anything anymore. And I've been doing it ever since then."

"That's not a healthy way to deal with it, Spencer," Ashley rubbed Spencer's back. "You've got to find a better outlet to get over this. It's clear that you're not yet."

Spencer chuckled. She pulled away from Ashley and stared at her. "You think you know, Ashley, but you have no idea. No idea how hard it is to deal with this. Time is supposed to make it easier, but it hasn't. It's made it so much harder."

Ashley shook her head. "Spencer, you don't have a clue on what I've been through. Just like I don't know what you've been through. So don't just assume I don't know how hard it is because you're angry with what happened. I lost my dad because he drank himself dead. And my mom, god my mom was so lost without him. The last words I got from her were, "I love you, Ashley, but I can't deal with this anymore. I love you so much." So Spencer, don't say that I don't know what you're going through."

"Ashley, I didn't—"

"Save it, Spencer," Ashley stood up from the couch. She looked down at Spencer. "You may feel the need to drink yourself into a stupor every time you feel upset about what happened. But me, I've learned to cope with it."

"How're my girls?" Glen asked cheerily, stepping into the room, freshly showered. He glanced at the situation, Ashley standing up and Spencer sitting on the couch, both shooting daggers at the other. "What's going on?"

Ashley shook her head and gave a small laugh. "I was just leaving, Glen. Thanks for inviting me over, but I should really get home." She didn't give anyone a chance to reply; she had picked up her keys and left the house by the time anyone could blink.

Glen's eyes met Spencer's. "Spence, what the hell was that?"

"That was me acting like an ass," Spencer let out a sigh, getting up from the couch. "I need a sandwich."

"What did you do, Spencer?" Glen asked, stopping his sister from going anywhere. "And what's this about a sandwich? You never have those unless you're really upset. I haven't seen you eat one in years."

Spencer tried to shrug Glen's hand from her shoulder. "It's nothing Glen." Succeeding, she pushed past him and back into the kitchen. "Ashley just made things clearer. But more confusing. If that makes any sense."

"No, it doesn't." Glen followed Spencer into the room. "But wait, what did Ashley do? Are you going to stop drinking?"

Spencer shook her head and shrugged her shoulders. "Who knows, Glen? I don't."

"Well are you at least going to keep talking to her? I kinda like this side of you more than the drunk one," Glen poked Spencer in the side, making the woman screech loudly.

"I don't know, Glen," Spencer shrugged again and stuck her knife into the mayonnaise jar. "I honestly don't know."

Glen smiled at his sister. "Well, I do. If you don't call her tomorrow, then I'm making the call for you."

"You wouldn't dare," Spencer shoved the sandwich into her mouth.

"One day at a time, Spence. One day at a time." Glen gave Spencer a quick hug before heading out of the room. "Going to the gym to work out. You'd better be here when I get back."

"And just how am I supposed to entertain myself with you gone?" Spencer whined.

Glen threw a crumpled piece of paper at Spencer and left without a word.

Spencer picked it up from the ground and unfolded it. "This just might work." Spencer smiled and made her way over to the phone. She dialed the number. "Hey, Ashley?" She waited for a response. "Look, I just wanted to say that I was sorry about everything that happened." She took a deep breath and her hands played with the hem of her shirt. "You think you can come back over? I kinda want to talk to you some more."


	25. N I T

**Super Update Thursday**

--

They closed the doors behind her and they sealed slowly, gradually blocking out the sunlight. Now, the only light in the building was a million different colors because of the stained glass.

Ashley Davies couldn't remember the last time she was in a church, if she ever was. There was vaguely a memory of her being baptized, and her kicking the priest in the shin when he sprinkled drops of water across her forehead. Then her little brother shrieked maniacally too, but that was to be expected. The boy hated taking baths.

"Come with me," the man said, Detective Lowry his name was. He seemed like a nice guy, but ever since she was twelve she'd been skeptical of men.

They'd never been very kind to her.

Explains why she's here in the first place, forced to hide out in this holiest of all places. Her attacker, the first and last one, had recently been released from prison. And immediately following his release the letters started coming – letters containing pictures of her leaving and going to work, pictures of her building, her recreational hang outs. When the pictures started to star the inside of her apartment building her brother demanded she be moved somewhere else, somewhere safer.

And what could be safer than a convent?

She surveyed the massive temple once more.

God help her.

Detective Lowry opened a side door, just to the left of the vestibule, and she followed, instantly creeped out. It reminded her of a secret passageway or something. Very DaVinci Code.

But soon, it gave way to a piercing light, and that was where she found them. Father Thomas and his team of flying nuns. Intimidation never had a more accurate description than the look on Ashley's face in that moment.

The Father stepped forward, holding his arms out warmly, welcoming her. "Hello, my child. Welcome to the house of Our Lord, and your Savior."

She smiled weakly as he stepped forward, encouragingly.

Ashley kept her distance.

"Put the arms away Father," Detective Lowry said, amused. "She's not a hugger."

"Oh I see," the Father laughed, understanding. "Maybe she'll be more comfortable after the sisters have shown her around."

His comment, though not worded as a question, certainly seemed like one, especially since all eyes were now trained on her. The old women looked her over, seemingly taking in her appearance with disdain. They'd probably never even seen a skirt that short.

She rolled her eyes. "I don't think I can stay here," she said suddenly, turning to the detective. "I know you thought this would work, but I don't think I can hang here, around these…people." He looked confused, and she finally, albeit quietly, broke it down for him. "I don't think they want me here."

"That's not true."

She barely heard the voice, yet it still registered as the most angelic thing she'd ever heard.

She turned her attention back to the group of women and found a young girl, approximately her age looking back at her. She wore a simple black jumper, a stark white blouse underneath. Her hair was pulled back into an easy pony tail, and she wasn't wearing any make-up.

In short, she was as plain as…something very plain, but her beauty was still unmatched by anything Ashley had ever laid eyes on.

"We'd never turn our back on a child of God," the girl said, smiling brightly. "That's not what we believe in," she added, shrugging slightly.

Ashley, still completely mystified, stood there, transfixed, unmoving.

Detective Lowry, an inscrutable smile on his face, turned in her direction once more. "So…are you staying?"

Ashley finally blinked and stared up at the figure of Christ, painted beautifully across a stretched canvas. He seemed to be looking right at her, palms outstretched in a welcome home gesture. Then, she knew this had to be a bad dream, because if she wasn't mistaken, it kinda looked like he winked at her.

Shaking her head free of that thought, she simply shrugged. "I don't think I have a choice."

--

The girl, Spencer her name was, showed her around the entire complex. Their living quarters, the garden, where they ate, where they prayed, the cleaning facilities, where they prayed, the workshop, and (in case she forgot to mention) where they prayed.

It was when they passed yet another prayer altar that she stopped the girl. "Why'd you decide to marry Jesus?" she asked, frankly, with no malice.

However, she hadn't expected to stun the girl into silence. Spencer stared back at her, her blue eyes wide with…something. Possibly disbelief. Finally, she managed to squeak out an "Excuse me?"

"Um…marry…Jesus? That is what nuns do isn't it?" Ashley prodded, more intrigued than anything else.

"Nuns commit their life's service to carrying out God's work. We don't marry Jesus," Spencer replied, a little chagrined.

Ashley didn't notice. "_Oh. _But you don't have sex right?"

Spencer's ears and cheeks burned and it took everything Ashley had in her not to smile, or smirk. More than likely, smirk.

"We take a vow of chastity at inception yes. When we get our habit," Spencer answered, barely. She kept her eyes averted as well. "But I haven't…not yet."

"No?"

"No, I'm still in postulancy," she answered, turning into the chapel.

Ashley hesitated a moment before following, realizing the girl had yet to answer her initial question. She turned into the place, marveling again at the stained glass. The light spilled through those window panes and cast the place in a rosy golden hue.

She turned towards Spencer and found that the light had followed her, bringing out the blue of her eyes, the blush of her cheeks, and the golden locks of hair framing her angelic face. She almost fainted.

"You, uh, never answered my question though, Spence," she said, not noticing the shortening of the other girl's name. She was more wrapped up in the girl's glow than anything else.

Spencer smiled unwittingly at the nickname. It'd been years since anyone had called her that. Not since her mother died. "What question was that?" she asked, standing directly in front of Ashley.

They were standing in the transept, the aisle that cut directly across the pulpit, dead in the middle. Again, a large crucifix was positioned above them.

"Why did you decide to become a nun?" Ashley asked, then added quickly after catching the look in Spencer's eyes. "Look, I only ask because you're so young. It's kind of unusual for people to join up so young, right?"

Spencer shrugged. "I guess so."

"So, why did you?"

"My mom," she started, then stopped, staring up at Jesus. "She was a devout catholic."

"Was?"

"She died," Spencer said, eyes darting quickly between brown ones and the cross.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Ashley said, stepping forward with concern.

"No, it's okay. It was quite some time ago now. But, she…she always wanted one of her children to commit to the Lord, to service Him completely. It was her dying wish. And since my brother Glen is in the running for the title of devil incarnate…" she trailed off, rolling her eyes slightly. "I decided to join the church then."

"I see," Ashley said, nodding slowly. "But isn't that a little shirky? I mean, it's almost like you're not even doing it for you, you know?"

Spencer stared at her. "You pretty much always say what you feel, don't you?"

"I lack a social filter," she answered, shrugging. "It's pretty much verbal diarrhea."

"How…descriptive," Spencer said, raising her eyebrows slightly before squinting in contemplation. "And accurate."

"Thank you." Ashley bowed.

"And yeah, you're right. It's not the most ideal way to go about becoming a nun. But, I owed it to her," Spencer continued, and upon the brunette's look of abject confusion, she carried on. "I wasn't exactly the poster child for the perfect daughter."

"Bad?" Ashley asked, raising a coy eyebrow.

"No…just misguided, possibly. Confused. I liked girls," she said, just like that. Fact. No judgment.

Ashley nearly fainted. "Come again?"

"I know. Brutally shocking, right? But, yes, I did. I do, actually. But, here…here they teach you that God loves everyone, even a homosexual. He just doesn't like a sinner, so…"

"Bury all your natural human responses and you've got a straight one way ticket to heaven," Ashley finished for the girl, now somehow disheartened. "You don't actually believe that, do you?"

"Believe what?"

"That you can…change. Deny what you feel,"

"After a while, it becomes second nature," Spencer said, fixing her gaze on Ashley and then facing the cross. "He looks as though he favors us."

Ashley kept her eyes trained on Spencer's profile for just second longer than she should have before facing the monument herself. Indeed, Jesus, suspended in space and suffering on the cross, almost appeared to be smiling down on them.

"Maybe he does."

--

It was night time. Her first night in the convent.

She'd met with Mother Superior who deemed the tank top she was wearing too revealing and offered her a sweater. A massive olive green thing that nearly threatened to engulf her. But she put it on, not wanting to make waves.

Or maybe it was the fact that Spencer was the creator of said item.

Still, lying in the bared room in complete silence was now her least favorite thing to do. As well as eat that stuff they tried to pass off as soup.

She was starving.

Lost in her thoughts, she nearly jumped out of the bed when a knock sounded at her door. Quiet and timid it was, but still unexpected enough to give her pause.

"Who is it?" she whispered, ear pressed against the door.

"It's Spencer," a voice whispered back.

Immediately Ashley flung the door open, smiling instantly when her eyes found favor in the blonde.

Spencer beamed back holding up a small zip lock bag. Cookies. "Brought you something."

"Oh man, get in here," Ashley muttered, dragging the smaller girl in by the arm. "You are such a life saver."

Spencer shuffled inside, standing near Ashley's bed as she held out the cookies. "I noticed you didn't eat much dinner and I had some stashed away."

"Life saver," Ashley repeated, almost snatching the bag away and tearing into the cookies greedily. She was starting her third when her manners finally caught up to her. "You want some?"

Spencer shook her head, a small smile playing on her lips. "No thanks."

"I didn't peg you as the baked goods type. I always thought candy was up your alley,"

Spencer shook her head. "My mom wasn't a big fan of sweets, but she occasionally let us indulge. Cookies and cake were as far as it went though."

"No Twix?" Ashley asked and Spencer squinted her eyes at her. "What's Twix?"

The brunette balked, almost affronted, but she let it go without injury. There'd be time to rectify that situation later.

Ashley nodded at the bed. "You can sit down you know," she said through a mouthful of cookie. "I don't bite." She somehow resisted the urge to add, 'Unless you want me to.' She didn't think that would go over too well here.

Spencer gave the other girl a wane smile and sat down on the bed, lightly. She glanced around a bit before returning her gaze to the brunette, startled a bit to find that Ashley was looking at her.

"How'd you know I'd be awake?" Ashley asked her, still munching away.

"It's kind of hard to go to sleep your first night here. That much I remember," Spencer said, fingering the light bedspread anxiously. "I figured you'd still be up or at least counting sheep."

"I count cows. They're slower than sheep and therefore easier to count," Ashley replied, somewhat offhandedly, then smiled as Spencer laughed quietly.

"That's…wow, that's kinda…"

"Weird?" Ashley supplied, shrugging and Spencer merely nodded. "I know. But, weird is my thing I suppose." They both grew quiet and Ashley finished off another cookie. "Thanks again for bringing me these, though. I mean, I so want to hug you, you have no idea."

Spencer actually giggled, yes giggled, before lowering her head awkwardly. "It was nothing."

"No," Ashley corrected, fixing her gaze on the other girl as she sat up slightly, shifting closer. She placed her hand over one of Spencer's, clasping it gently and giving it a firm squeeze. "It was everything, Spencer. Thank you."

Spencer stared back, her jaw a little slack. She felt drawn to the other girl, an almost magnetic attraction. But as quickly as it had materialized, the moment passed and she shook herself both mentally and physically.

She stood up quickly, glancing awkwardly to the brunette, then fingering the rosary in her hands nervously. "I should let you get to sleep."

Ashley shot up as well. "I don't mind."

"No, really Ashley," Spencer said, feeling and being a little sketchy. "I should really leave."

"What's the matter huh?" Ashley asked her softly. "What are you afraid of?" Her soft voice was now coupled with soft ministrations to the blonde's hand.

"I'll see you tomorrow," the blonde uttered, almost under her breath. Before Ashley could protest she was gone, opening and then closing the door behind her, leaving the brunette confused.

Full, but confused.

But that was nothing new really.

--

She was awake at the crack of dawn, or day, or whatever time of morning it was. All she knew was that it was still dark out and yet the holy people had the organs going already.

She was even less enthused when she realized that she'd only fallen asleep two hours prior according to her wrist watch. Unfortunately, though her little late night escapades with Spencer had been welcome, the chocolate only made her hyper, not to mention she was now obsessed with the other girl's evasive behavior.

She was mid-yawn when they finally collected her, the abrupt knock almost startling her out of bed.

"Top o' the mornin' to you lassie," Sister O'Malley said, sounding unbelievingly lively and chipper for this ungodly (no pun) hour. "Trust you slept well." The nun turned to get a good look at a still yawning Ashley, smiling warmly as the girl rubbed sleep from her eyes.

"Uh huh," Ashley said, still trying to swallow gulps of air.

"Well, you'll be needing the restroom, no doubt. 'Tis right down the hall, to the right there," Sister O'Malley said, ushering the girl into the hallway. "We'll have breakfast waiting for you right after th' mornin' prayer."

"Uh, thanks," Ashley said, stumbling down the corridor, her lone bag slung over her shoulder.

She walked into the room quickly, not one hundred percent oblivious to the eyes on her. She still stood out like a red sock in a load of whites…and blacks. Or, you know, a pink penguin.

She snorted aloud at that thought.

"What's funny?"

Again with the choking.

"Wha-"

She turned abruptly to see a smiling Spencer, freshly showered (obvious only because of the wet hair), and dressed up in an adorable little jumper, making Ashley's mind immediately flash back to Catholic school. "Oh, hey," she muttered, not in a way, or at least that's what she hoped.

"Good morning," Spencer said, easily picking up on some irritation. "Did you sleep okay?"

'Not actually considering I was thinking about you all night.' Ashley's subconscious didn't sound too happy.

"Huh?" Spencer questioned and it was only then that the brunette realized she'd muttered that last statement aloud.

"Nothing. Just… I'm used to sleeping in my own bed," Ashley finally said, uncapping some toothpaste to brush her teeth.

"Oh," Spencer demurred, stepping away slightly, her eyes a little less cheerful than before. "Well, I'm gonna head on down to help with breakfast. I'll see you around."

Before Ashley could say anything else the girl was gone, leaving Ashley to once again stew in her feelings.

--

It was late afternoon when they had a moment alone again. However, this time Ashley was the one to catch the other girl unsuspecting.

She cornered Spencer in one of the rose gardens.

"You like flowers?"

Spencer nearly jumped out of her skin; feeling and hearing Ashley's voice so close to her ear. She was kneeling in one of the many flower beds, her fingers tickling the soft petals of a daisy.

"They have their appeal, yes," Spencer said, recovering rather quickly, although, it was fair to say that Ashley had an uncanny ability to put her off-guard.

"I never was too fond of them. That is, until my doctor prescribed the perfect allergy pill," the brunette said, smiling when Spencer finally turned to look at her. She took a deep breath and released it. "See? Sneeze free and not a watery eye in sight."

Spencer giggled and Ashley found it quite becoming. She plucked a flower from the patch, holding it out for Spencer to take. "I brought you something."

The blonde smiled, holding the flower lightly between her fingertips, twirling it a little. "How thoughtful of you," she teased, and Ashley ducked her head, reddening slightly.

"Well, you know. I try," she said, pretending to be humbled. But then her smile turned a little more quixotic. "But, really, I have something for you." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a gold wrapper, dangling it in front of Spencer's face. "Go on. Take it. It's small in stature but big on goodness."

Spencer took the tin Twix bar out of her hands, glancing at it curiously before opening it at Ashley's silent but persistent coaxing. She took out the chocolate coated, caramel covered, cookie bar and took a bite, closing her eyes just a little to savor it.

When she opened them, she found brown ones intently looking at hers. "Oh my gosh, Ashley. This is so good."

Ashley smiled, before smirking a little. "No way. That is absolutely sinful."

Spencer rolled her eyes before swallowing. "Well, that too."

Oblivious to both girls, Mother Frances, also known as Mother Superior, was watching them from a distance, frowning in disappointment.

--

Spencer was on her way to meet with Mother Frances, well, she was actually there, but she heard her name and the door was open a smidgen and eavesdropping isn't a sin, is it?

"Oh, psh posh. Those lasses are nothin' more n' friends, Clara." Sister O'Malley dismissed the claim quickly.

"I've seen the way she looks at her, Sister. There's something more than friendly at work there," Mother Frances maintained, lowering her voice more. "Now, I'm not saying we kick the girl or girls out of the convent–"

"Thank the Lord,"

"But," Mother Frances surged onward, her tone that of one who doesn't appreciate interruption. "I think we need to speak with Spencer about where it is her heart truly lies. I don't want to burden the girl with a life of servitude and dedication if it's not truly what her calling is."

"That is not for us to decide Mother. 'Tis for the girl to decide." Spencer could hear the Sister moving, her hard gait one that was decidedly distinctive.

"And if she decides wrong?"

"Well, then, that's somethin' she'd have to take up with our God."

Spencer didn't stay for the meeting. Instead, she ran away, as fast as she could, seeking out the solace and privacy of her room. The four walled cubicle carved out in this place for her. But, because life was so cruel (or God was that great) she ended up running smack into Ashley.

"Whoa," Ashley said, clutching the other girl's arms to right them both. "Where's the fire?"

Spencer could barely breathe and was barely keeping it together anyway, so tormented she was inside. The concern she saw in Ashley's eyes literally broke her heart and before she could stop she was crying uncontrollably, and inconsolably.

Ashley, compassionate and possibly a little panicky, pulled the sobbing girl to her, holding her as tightly as she could manage.

"What's wrong?" she whispered, her mouth very close to Spencer's ear, but the blonde just shook her head, sniffling. "What happened, sweetheart? You can tell me anything. It's okay."

She should have seen it coming, just because since she'd entered this place everything that has happened to her has been rather unexpected, but somehow, when Spencer suddenly turned her head and pressed her lips against Ashley's the brunette jumped in surprise. But only momentarily because oh my God could Spencer kiss.

It lasted longer than either of them anticipated. Spencer's entire body burned when Ashley started to respond to her kiss. She literally felt herself heating up, and even in the cooled chamber of the convent's halls she felt like she needed to lose the clothes and fast, and not in _that _way.

Ashley, on her part, kept going and would continue to kiss the blonde until she turned blue if need be. As long as Spencer was okay with this then there was no way she was going to pull away.

Inevitably though, the blonde pulled back, slowly and lips glistening, begging to be re-kissed. She leaned forward again, this time pressing her forehead against Ashley's. Her eyes were screwed shut and her chest heaved with quickened breaths.

Ashley observed all of this from a few scant centimeters away and though she didn't really want to know she couldn't really stop herself from asking. "What was that?" she whispered, but she may as well have screamed it.

Spencer's eyes flew open, the blue blazing like an ice inferno. She pulled away entirely and was just on the verge of bolting when Ashley caught her wrist, holding her firmly in place.

"Let me go Ashley," the blonde implore, struggling to pull her hand away.

"No. Now would you jus–"

"I have to go," Spencer whispered urgently, fixing Ashley with a fierce look. She looked so afraid, so incredibly crushed, that Ashley had no choice other than to let her go, watching dejectedly as the other girl ran away never looking back.

--

Mother Frances and Sister O'Malley were walking along the convent's corridors, silently enjoying each other's company, and praying to their God when they passed one of the many altars that littered every corner of the building.

There the brunette girl knelt, praying very silently and seemingly very hard to someone.

They probably shouldn't intrude, but they couldn't help it. They had no indication the girl was anything other than non-religious.

Ashley cursed very loudly, wiping a tear away before calming herself, shifting on her knees again. Squeezing her hands even closer together and closing her eyes that much more tightly, she started once more; silently recounting the day's events to who she hoped was God.

"I don't know why I'm even telling you any of this," she said aloud. "Even if you are listening it's not like you'd ever listen to me."

Sister O'Malley stepped forward to intervene, but Mother Frances kept her still.

"Oh well, it's still worth a shot. She's worth a shot. I'm not gonna pretend I've done a lot of good things in my life, and I'm not even gonna attempt to presume that I deserve anything good in my life…It's just…it's her, man. I've never _ever_ felt about anyone the way I feel about her. She actually makes me feel like I'm a good person. Hell, she makes me want to be a good person." The girl winced, "I mean, I'm sorry about the swear. I'm trying to stop. Anyway, if you could just let her see…My mom didn't teach me a lot of things but she always told me that people like you will always forgive if you follow your heart because following your heart could never be a sin. After all, that's how you speak to us. So…if you could, just, can you let Spencer know that too? I promise I'll only do what's right for her. I'll be good for her. Just, make her see…" Ashley peered up at the altar, the picture of Christ and the Sacred Heart staring back at her. It was like she was waiting for something, maybe an answer. "Amen," she finally murmured at long last, making the sign of the cross, and promptly leaving.

The two sisters eased back into the shadows before she could see them but not before Spencer saw them.

The other girl stood wide-eyed, scared more than she thought she could ever be. Mother Frances' face showed no change. It still looked as stern as ever, and Spencer almost shuddered when a stone-faced Sister O'Malley emerged from the shadows beside her.

"I…" Spencer started but then realized she didn't really have anything to say. As the words ran out she dropped her head, staring at the ground ashamed.

"Now, you pick your head up lass," Sister O'Malley said firmly, hands in her pocket.

Spencer hesitantly raised her head and looked at the two women, surprised at the expressions they had on their faces. They didn't looked angry, or disgusted. No. They were smiling.

"I'm afraid Ashley has it right my child," Mother Frances said. "It is never wrong to follow your heart."

"You mean?"

"Go to her Spencer," the senior nun said, smiling gently.

Spencer stood stock still, unbelieving.

"Go on," Sister O'Malley said, waving her off. "Get on out of here lassie before me change me mind."

Spencer didn't need to be told a third time.

--

She found her, in the garden, kneeling amongst the bed of flowers – just sitting there, barely aware of the light mist that had started to come down from the heavens.

Spencer walked over to her silently, trying to calm her racing heart. With every step her breathing quickened and she was somewhat certain she would pass out.

She was standing directly over the girl when she reached a trembling hand out – Ashley's shoulder her target.

The brunette jumped and then turned when she felt the fingers on her shoulder, eyes wide as saucers as she took in Spencer's sudden appearance.

"Hi," she somehow managed, voice barely more than a whisper.

Spencer smiled at her, hoping to ease some of the apprehension both of them were feeling. "Hi Ashley."

"I…um…I…"

"I've got something for you," Spencer said, handing her a yellow daisy.

Ashley held up the pathetic looking thing. It only had three petals on it.

"Start on 'she loves me'," Spencer said, grinning at the girl.

Ashley smiled now, tossing the flower aside and standing up to hug the other girl, holding on as tightly as she could. "What does this mean?" She had to ask.

"It just means I'm following my heart."


	26. Don't Take It Personal

**Don't Take It…Personal**

"Chelsea?" Spencer's head peeked around the door of the apartment turned full blown art studio. There wasn't one inch that couldn't be described as art. Well, with the exception of the kitchen. But who wants their cooking area to be covered in paint-like things? Not Chelsea or Spencer, that's who.

Spencer walked through the threshold and into the dimly lit…apartment turned art studio. "Chels, you in here?" Her voice was just barely above a whisper.

A clatter of wooden frames echoed against the bare walls and Spencer jumped. "Who—who's there?" she asked, with a shaky voice of course. She blindly reached out and picked up one of Chelsea's bigger paint brushes, ready to attack at any given moment.

"I said who's there?!" Spencer practically yelled, startling the person even more, causing another set of wooden frames to crash against the tile floor.

Spencer tip-toed around the couch, the paint brush raised high above her head, poised to smack someone right in the forehead. "Show yourself!" she said harshly. "I know kara_te_!"

"And about fifty other scary words, huh?" Chelsea chuckled, pushing herself up from the floor. Her eyes met the widened, shocked blue eyes of Spencer.

Spencer let out a sigh of relief. She brought the brush back down with a slight laugh, placing it onto one of the randomly placed tables. "You scared me, Chels."

"You scared _me_, Spence," Chelsea replied softly. She brought her hands to the front of her shirt and removed the wrinkles and paint speckles that had collected from her fall.

"What happened?" Spencer asked, running her fingers through her hair.

"I went to reach for the paint on the top shelf," Chelsea pointed up into the closet at the tubes of paint resting there, taunting the smaller woman. "What are you doing here?"

Spencer chuckled. "That…let's just say I give up on guys."

"What happened, Spence?" The other woman led Spencer to the table covered with sketches, paint brushes, frames, and bowls of water. Lots and lots of water.

"They all suck." Spencer huffed. She eyed the room.

"What about Jerry? He was a nice guy."

The blonde rolled her eyes. "He had a mole." Chelsea opened her mouth to interject, but Spencer cut her off. "On his face, the size of Texas."

"Oh," Chelsea whispered. "What about Tom? You said he was alright."

"Well…" Spencer gave a small uneasy chuckle. "Let's just say that he was on the _small_ side of things."

Chelsea giggled. "Oh God. That's…a horrible thing to say."

"Yet entirely true." Spencer cheeks were flush red.

"Adam?"

"Six pack."

"That's not bad," Chelsea pointed out. She stood up from her chair and entered the kitchen again. This time, she returned with two bottles of water and a bag of Chips Ahoy chocolate chip cookies.

"When the six pack was soda he always carried around, then yeah, it was bad." Spencer rolled her eyes and reached in for a cookie. Before shoving it into her mouth, she added, "And he was obsessed with Halo…or something. He wouldn't stop playing it."

"Oh wow," Chelsea said. "Well Dean seemed like he was perfect."

Spencer let out a sigh after finishing the cookie off. "He was. Until he took off his shoes." She saw Chelsea raise an eyebrow in her direction. "It smelled like Fritos with pickles."

"Oh God," Chelsea groaned, pushing the cookies away from her with a look of disgust on her face. "That just ruined my appetite."

"Yup. Lost five pounds in that relationship," Spencer casually added, popping another tasty morsel into her mouth.

"I know just what you need," Chelsea smiled at her friend: that evil smile that spoke of everything evil and lets everyone know that you're up to something.

Spencer eyed Chelsea with caution. "Whatchu talkin' 'bout Willis?"

"Put out a personal!" Chelsea exclaimed. That evil smile still there. "It's the perfect way for you to find someone."

"I don't know Chels," Spencer stuttered out, not very keen on that idea. "That all seems so…random and luck of the draw. What if I end up with some crazy?"

"You won't know until you try," Chelsea winked at Spencer, causing the blonde to let out a rather large sigh. "And I'm fairly certain the paper screens for crazies."

"Not the normal crazies," Spencer muttered.

"Well that should be right up your alley," Chelsea grinned and Spencer scoffed at her rolling her eyes.

Chelsea just chuckled, snatching the bag of cookies away. "Just try it," she told Spencer, waving the cookies in front of her. "Try it and I'll give you the cookies."

Spencer glared at her but finally broke down. "Fine. I'll do it now." Spencer rolled her eyes at her giddy best friend. "Get me a pen and some paper."

Chelsea stood up from her seat and rummaged through her drawers for the wanted items. "Do you know what to do?" Spencer shook her head, taking the pen and paper from Chelsea. "Well, write SWF first."

"SWF? What's that?"

"Single, white female. Duh." Chelsea chuckled. "Here, move over. Let me do this for you. I'll give it some pizzazz." Spencer unwillingly complied, scooting over one seat to let her friend take over, still munching away on cookies.

"You can't do it," Ashley taunted. "You're gonna choke."

Aiden turned his head to face his friend and co-worker. "Will you shut up? If you keep talking I'm gonna miss it for sure."

"That's the point," Ashley deadpanned, flashing the man a cheeky grin. "Just go already."

"Will you keep quiet?" Aiden asked raising his eyebrow at the smaller woman.

Ashley nodded her head and waited for Aiden to take his shot. He brought the putter back slightly before swinging it forward, hitting the little white ball in the process. They both watched as it traveled toward the cup set up in the middle of the room, just barely missing it.

"Aha! I knew you couldn't do it," Ashley gloated, smacking the man on his arm before sticking her hand out. "Five bucks, please."

Aiden dug around in his pocket, retrieving the bill, handing it to the brunette woman. "I can't believe I lost a bet."

"Well get used to it," Ashley smiled, taking the money and shoving it into her own pocket. "And don't mess with me. I rule the dare world."

"Is that so?" Aiden questioned. He leaned up against the desk behind both of them.

Ashley nodded her head. "Yup. There is _nothing_ I will back down from."

"Well then," Aiden trailed off, getting this intellectual look on his face. You know, not what we're used to seeing, but it's there… sometimes. "I dare you to…answer a personal."

"What?!" Ashley's eyes flew open… more open.

Aiden's eyes met her glare. "Yup. Either you take it, or I get fifty bucks."

Ashley pretended to think about it but she was never one to back down from a challenge, especially not one from Aiden.

"You're on. Get me the paper," she hurriedly demanded. She sat down on the very comfortable chair behind her desk, watching as Aiden left the room quickly to retrieve the newspaper. "This is going to be horrible," she muttered to herself as she twirled around in the chair.

"Got it," Aiden rushed out, raising the paper up for Ashley to see. He threw it onto the desk before her, turning it to the Personals section. "Gotta do it randomly, though. No reading through them."

Ashley rolled her eyes before closing them. Men were so juvenile. She raised her finger and swung it above the paper before slamming it into the table. Wincing slightly, she slowly opened her eyes, leaning down and read it to herself. "Huh. That's not too bad."

"What's it say?" Aiden asked, towering over the brunette in an attempt to read it.

"Single, white female looking for someone to snuggle up to on cold winter nights. Enjoys movies, walks in the park, and is music obsessed." Ashley's face contorted in thought. "That's actually pretty good. My kinda girl."

Aiden let out a loud laugh. "You're actually going to call this chick?" Ashley nodded her head before picking up the company phone. "What if she's some psycho?"

"Then I guess we'll find out now won't we?" Ashley raised her eyebrow at the man standing just a few feet away from her. She held up a finger to cease his blabbering as the phone started to ring. "Hi, this is Ashley Davies. I'm calling about your ad in the paper?"

Aiden scoffed loudly before storming out of the office room. He hated losing, although, you'd think he'd be used to it by now.

"Yeah, I'd like that. How about a dinner date at Chez Roberts tomorrow night at eight?" She smiled brightly at the blustering woman on the other end of the phone. "Alright. See you then. Bye."

"Chelsea!" Spencer screamed as soon as she hung up the phone. "Chelsea, get your big butt down here!"

The scurrying feet of Chelsea echoed in the apartment. "My butt is not big," she scoffed before asking Spencer what happened.

"I have a date," Spencer whispered, looking as if she was going to cry.

"That's great," Chelsea chuckled at the blonde's demeanor. "Right? I mean, that was kinda the point Spence. It's not a bad thing."

Spencer huffed, "It is when it's with another woman!"

"About time," Chelsea muttered under her breath.

"What was that?"

Chelsea giggled. "I said, about time."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Spencer narrowed her eyes and glared at her friend who leaned up against the counter.

"It's about time that you went for a woman. All these…guys are just adding to the fact that you, Spencer Carlin, are a lesbian."

Spencer's eyes flung open, as did her mouth. "I am not! How can you say such a thing?"

"Your favorite movie is _A League Of Their Own_," Chelsea started.

"I love softball," Spencer countered quietly.

"You have a thing for flannel,"

"It's comfortable!"

"Spence," Chelsea whispered softly. She walked toward the blonde and placed her hands on the woman's shoulders. "You wanted a monkey growing up."

_Huh. Maybe there was something to it, _Spence thought with a sigh, she shrugged off Chelsea's hands and ran upstairs.

"It's nice to meet you," Ashley greeted softly as she walked up to the table Spencer was already sitting at. She held her hand out and waited for the blonde to take it into her own. "Ashley Davies," she whispered when soft fingers hit the palm of her hand.

"Spencer Carlin," Spencer said just as softly, pulling her hand back when she felt sparks ignite. "You look…wonderful," she pointed out, surprisingly.

Ashley blushed slightly and looked down at her outfit: simple jeans and a tight fitting black lacy shirt; not too shabby. "I could say the same to you," she stated slyly, her eyes raking over the blonde's short black skirt coupled with tight, dark blue, shirt.

Spencer ducked her head down. She wasn't exactly sure what to wear on her first (and probably last) ever date with another woman. But Chelsea insisted she'd look hot in this, and judging by Ashley's unabashed stare, she was right. Spencer unwittingly blushed and her hands moved across the table to cover her fluttering stomach, knocking her napkin to the floor in the process.

"Here, let me get that," Ashley said, bending over in her chair to reach for the napkin.

"No, it's okay. I got it," Spencer replied, quickly shoving her arm past the brunette's in an attempt to grab it first.

Both bumped heads instead. Apologies left both women's lips as they sat back up in their chairs, the napkin in Ashley's hand. "Here ya go."

"Thank you," she said shyly, feeling her cheeks burn. "I don't uh, usually do things like this."

"Go on dates?" Ashley teased, obviously knowing what she meant. "I don't usually answer personal ads either," she admitted, taking a sip of her water, her brown eyes never leaving the fidgeting other woman.

"So why did you?" Spencer was curious and now it was Ashley's turn to fidget.

"How about we save that question for later? You know, after a glass of wine or two. For now, let's just say I was…intrigued."

Spencer smiled, a little bewitched with the way Ashley was looking at her…or through her. It felt like she was looking inside of her. She reached for her own water, her hand just barely brushing by it, but the action was enough to send the tumbler on it side, water cascading across the tiny table, crashing onto Ashley's lap.

"Oh God," Spencer gasped, her eyes wide. "I'm so sorry."

"It's fine," Ashley squeaked, her lap now practically freezing. She stood up from her chair, water falling from her jeans onto the carpet beneath her feet. "I'm gonna be right back."

"Okay," Spencer replied, mortified as she watched Ashley run into the bathroom. She waved frantically in the other direction, trying to get someone's attention. "Chelsea!" she hissed loudly.

Chelsea inconspicuously made her way over to Spencer's table. "What the hell happened?" she whispered, rather loudly.

"I'm nervous," Spencer admitted genuinely, her cheeks on fire. "This feels like a date. Is this a date?"

"Yeah, it is Spence," Chelsea mumbled in reply. She smiled brightly at the blushing blonde, fixing her hair a little bit. "Just be cool and relax. She won't bite you. And even if she does you might enjoy it," she added with a wink as she backed away before Ashley returned.

Spencer nodded her head, a small smile gracing her features as she watched her friend leave the table in a hurry, idiotically standing behind one of the many large pillars decorating the restaurant.

"Aiden," Ashley hissed, eyes searching the corridor as she exited the bathroom. On her way in she'd caught his eye and told him to meet her. The man emerged from behind one of the many plants. "Oh God. What am I gonna do, Aiden? She super-soaked me."

"Just relax," Aiden chuckled at her. He glanced down and saw her pants still wet from the water. Obviously the hand dryer didn't work out so well. "So she's a little antsy. So what? She's still freaking hot."

"Ugh," Ashley groaned, rolling her eyes and starting past him. "You're such a guy."

"Hold on," he said, grabbing her arm before she could leave. "She's just nervous, okay? Just make things easier for her. Then they'll be easier for you."

Ashley smiled at the man. "You know what, Aiden?"

"What's that?"

"You'd make a great girl," she chuckled and made her way back to the table with the blonde, leaving the man speechless.

"So, you ready to order?" Ashley asked, sitting down in her seat, right next to a slightly red in the face Spencer who nodded in response. Both girls picked up their menus and glanced over them, not really saying anything.

"What are you getting?" Spencer asked from behind her paper menu.

Ashley sighed, weighing her options. "Not sure. What about you?" She raised her eyes to look at the other woman, not at all prepared for what she saw. The corner of Spencer's had menu dangled a little too close to the candle flame and caught fire. "Oh crap," she rushed out, scrambling out of harm's way.

"What?" Spencer asked, finally raising her head. Her eyes bugged out of her head when she saw her menu on fire. "Ohmigosh,!" she muttered, throwing the menu to the floor.

"Put it out!" Ashley screamed, staring at the awe-struck Spencer before stomping on the paper, putting it out just as one of the waiters threw a bucket of ice cold water onto it, covering her feet with it instead. "Let's just get out of here," she managed to get out through clenched teeth, as she winced from the instant cold on her toes.

Spencer nodded and stood up from her chair, grabbing the brunette's hand as she walked by. Their eyes gravitated to a couple sitting a little too close for comfort. "Oh _my_," both women whispered when they realized who they were.

Chelsea and Aiden.

Figures.

"That burger was delicious," Spencer sighed. She leaned back against the railing of the pier, her hand rubbing her stomach to emphasize her point.

Ashley smiled. "Yeah, it was. Who knew vendors could actually make good ones?"

Spencer raised her hand. "I did." She laughed at Ashley's wide eyes. "Nah, I didn't really."

"Hey Spencer?" Ashley asked, after a few seconds of silence.

"Yeah?"

"You wanna play 20 questions?"

Spencer let out a heavy sigh. "Sure. But let's walk back to our cars too. Work off some of this excess."

Ashley nodded her head. "So, you wanna go first?"

"Sure, uh, favorite color?" Spencer questioned, her stomach doing flip-flops as Ashley's fingers filled the spaces in between her own as they walked.

"Blue. Same to you,"

"Brown,"

"Brown?" Ashley asked, scrunching up her face.

"Yeah, what's it to you?" Spencer was a bit defensive about her favorite color.

"Nothing," Ashley rushed to say. "It's just not every day that someone looks through the entire color spectrum and picks brown as their favorite. It's kind of plain."

"Brown can be exquisite. Breathtakingly beautiful…amazing even," Spencer said, her eyes never leaving Ashley's. She blushed of course; even more so when Ashley looked at her straight on and informed her that she'd always felt that way about blue. The moment got a little too heavy for the blonde, so she cleared her throat and changed topics. "Favorite place to visit?"

"The beach at sunset. Especially if you find the right spot to sit and watch it," she said, smiling brightly.

"Wow," Spencer breathed out. She closed her eyes and imagined the scene in her head; specifically the scene involving her and Ashley. She shook her head, breaking her thoughts. "Your turn."

Ashley stopped walking and turned to face the blonde. "What made you put out the ad?"

"Honestly?" Spencer stalled.

"I'd prefer it," Ashley said, affixing the blonde woman with a bright smile.

"I didn't want to be alone anymore." Spencer shrugged, her eyes finding the ground as she stared at her shoes.

"Well, what is it that you're looking for?"

"I just want someone fit, but not too muscle-y; someone who has a sense of humor, but is serious sometimes; someone who can cook, but is willing to let me every once in a while, someone to make fun of the really old movies with me, but cry at the romantic and sad ones. I want someone who isn't afraid to walk around in sweats, but knows how to dress up and someone to hold me just as much as they're willing to let me hold them,"

Ashley chuckled uneasily. "Kinda picky, aren't ya?"

Spencer gave her a watery smile, shrugging her shoulders. "But mostly, I just want someone to love me as much as I love them," she admitted, her voice soft and genuine. Ashley moved into her, her intent not obvious, but something about the action made her blurt out.

"Ashley, I'm not gay."

"No one said you were." The brunette's face fell a little.

"Chelsea thinks that I am," Spencer pointed out, a little shyly. Ashley furrowed her eyebrows together. "The one that was with…Aiden, I think you said his name was."

"Oh," Ashley nodded with realization. "Well, there's only one way to find out…"

"How's that?" Spencer asked, her eyes widening then fluttering closed just a second before Ashley's lips were on her own in a soft kiss.


	27. 30th Birthday Depression

**A/N: Man, sometimes I read you guys' review and just crack up. It's crazy. Thanks though. Feedback is an essential part to this fanfiction thing so it's great to get it and that is no exaggeration.**

**Rating - R**

**--**

Thirty.

The big 3-0.

Thirty freaking years on this planet and what had she to show for it?

She didn't have children, a fact her mother was never remiss in pointing out and she'd given up the one thing she thought she'd like to do en lieu of marrying this thing that never did anything she asked.

It wasn't like she asked for much.

Take out the trash, courtesy call if you're running late, remember her freaking thirtieth birthday.

That type of thing.

But lately it seemed that whatever Spencer asked of him was too much.

She was finding it hard to believe that she'd wasted so many years of her life on him.

He was her husband, of ten years.

Ten long years.

"What the heck is this?" Payton asked, glaring at the plate of food she'd just sat in front of him.

"Dinner," was her simple answer. "Eat it or don't," she muttered, throwing on her jacket.

"And where are you going?"

"Out."

She needed to get out of there…that place, her "home." Only she never really felt at home there. Everything had to have its place in that house.

The towels went here.

The spoons went there.

Everything had its right and proper place.

Except her.

She was the one thing that didn't seem to belong.

And on this, her thirtieth birthday, that thought alone was more than depressing.

The bar was relatively deserted.

She rapped on the counter with her knuckles, pointing two fingers down to indicate what it was she wanted.

The bartender sat a shot glass in front of her and gave her the bottle of Jack Daniels, better to let her go at her own pace.

She smiled warmly at the gesture, pouring herself a measured shot before tipping the glass back, wincing slightly as the honey colored liquid burned a path down her throat.

Soon, she'd forget.

Forget why she gave up school to follow him to Virginia.

Forget why she let him touch her, even though she never was in the mood.

Forget why she cried after…every time.

After all, he was her husband, a man.

She should enjoy it.

Should.

An empty glass.

Another refill.

Another shot.

The third was filled by a hand not belonging to her.

A stranger.

"I've got it," she heard the husky voice say, pouring the alcohol into her glass.

Her eyes shifted over to the new person, finding brown ones looking back at her. "That is, if that's okay?"

Her shrug was her answer.

"Not gonna talk, huh?"

Spencer kept her eyes straight forward, even as they watered slightly from the sting of another shot.

The husky voice chuckled.

"That's fine. I can work my way around talking…"

Ashley's teeth find the hem of Spencer's pale green camisole, and she slowly tugs it upward, her bottom lip brushing against Spencer's bare torso every second or so.

And Spencer's having a very hard time breathing. The darkness of the alley, the anonymity of it all, coupled with the fact that she was about to have sex was a woman for the first time, all sent her head-first into a tizzy. Her body was buzzing with anticipation, lustful anticipation, and it was sending her into a deliria.

The camisole was coming off, now, Ashley's calloused fingers moving pushing and pulling the offending material from Spencer's soft skin.

She was nearly naked now, in an alley-way, with a virtual stranger.

And yet it seemed so familiar.

"God," Ashley muttered out, her teeth sinking softly into the flesh of Spencer's shoulder, marking her territory. "You feel so good," she continued, and Spencer agreed. It did feel good, all of it.

But it was about to get serious now, all the teasing was about to become earnest. "This," Ashley breathed against her bruised lips. "This needs to come off," she finished, tugging harshly at Spencer's belt buckle, working the restraint off and then unbuttoning the lone button at the top of her jeans.

It was all happening so fast, and Spencer was powerless to stop her. At least, that's what she told her self.

The fact of the matter is that she could easily stop Ashley. Easily bring this affair to a sudden and crashing halt.

The fact of the matter is… she didn't want to.

She wrapped her arms around Ashley's shoulder, one hand tugging at base of her neck, grasping tighter when Ashley's tongue would brush across her own. The other hand held on for dear life, because the actions, movements of Ashley's hands on her were surely going to make her knees buckle.

Finally, Ashley had pushed the material of her tight jeans low enough to wear the bulky fabric pooled to the dingy floor, her underwear quickly following that route, and Ashley's fingers set out to make her forget all about that jerk of a boyfriend of hers.

Ashley had barely touched her and she felt her knees giving way, the swaying motion making Ashley press further against her, pushing her flush against the door, Ashley's body molding against her own, so perfectly, you almost couldn't tell there were two of them. Ashley's other arm, moved around her naked waist, giving her the added support she was sure she needed.

And then Ashley was inside of her, fingers exploring below, mouth exploring above. Ashley was filling her touching her intimately in so many ways, Spencer felt possessed. But she was oddly okay with Ashley being her possessor. With Ashley, she felt safe, even as she quivered, and her vulnerable body was being expertly guided into lustful submission, she felt as though, when it was all over, Ashley would still be there, holding her up, protecting her.

It warmed her.

Two minutes later, and Spencer was panting into Ashley's warm mouth. Her cheeks were flushed she knew, and Ashley had taken to driving her crazy. The brunette's hot mouth covered her breast again, the tongue flicking across the taut skin, her fingers driving deeper, so deep, into Spencer's warmth.

She felt like she was on the edge. About to fall over into what she didn't know, but it didn't matter. It was all okay. The image of a guitar string, a cord, being pulled in different directions flashed across her mind. The tension in the cord at its maximum as the delicate wire was stretched to its limitations. And then, without warning, not even a fraying at the edges, the wire broke.

And so did Spencer.

Ashley's fingers had curved expertly, right at that exact moment, finding some exquisite spot that made the image machine in Spencer's mind flicker before exploding into a chorus of white blinding light. She closed her eyes against the sensation, only to have it happen again a few moments later, Ashley's thumb rubbing against another, less hidden, spot.

She went completely rigid, before going completely slack, and just as she felt herself slipping off into unconsciousness, she felt Ashley's grip around her tighten.

As she suspected, the brunette was still holding her, supporting her, keeping her safe.

"I," Ashley breathed against her pulse point, some time after. "I can walk you home?"

"That won't be necessary," Spencer told her, pulling away to look at her, with a ghost of a smile.

The brunette deflated, completely spent, and now a little humiliated. "I understand." Her fingers reached for the blonde's, bringing up her left hand, her ring hand. The diamond ring found whatever light there was and glistened, mockingly, at the brunette. "I understand completely."

Spencer felt something clench, deep within her chest. The ring, the promise she made on that fateful day, tarnished forever.

It would be a lie from this day forward, she knew.

She knew.

But she didn't care.

She slipped the ring off her finger, the weight of the thing gone now.

The chains that bonded her to quote un-quote normalcy finally unfettered.

No more pretending to be in love.

It was time to actualize.

No, she didn't need to be walked home.

She already was home.


	28. About a Dame

**A/N: For my next story I'm going to ask you guys to pick out 3 of the Fifty First Times that have been written that you'd like to see continued. Then, tallying those votes we'll do a poll and the winner will be the next fic I'm going to write. I think I may be setting myself up for failure here.**

**--**

It was a dark and rainy night. My partner, Glen, and I were getting ready to call it quits for the evening.

That's when she walked in.

Now, Spencer Carlin, she was no average looking dame. In fact, I nearly choked on my stogie the first time I laid eyes on her.

She was wearing a trench coat, open, and underneath was red, head to toe. Her red wire-rimmed hat was tilted so that it hid one bright blue eye, and her red heels contrasted nicely with the milky white of her legs. And her golden blonde hair was curled to perfection, the spiraled ringlets hanging down to frame her angelic face.

Yeah, she was definitely no average girl.

But usually, those girls are poison.

I sat back in my chair as she sauntered up to my desk, watching me intently. "Are you Detective Davies?" she asks and I die a little. She's got a little taste of southern mixed in with that city girl accent.

"Who wants to know?" Glen asks gruffly. He doesn't take too well to strangers.

I hold up my hand to keep him from further startling the girl. He grumbles but obediently takes another sip of his scotch.

"How can I help you Miss…?" I ask, standing so I can pull out her chair.

"It's Carlin. Spencer Carlin," she says –only it sound more like Cah-lin – as she steps forward and shrugs out of her coat, handing it to me and I drape it over my arm taking time to admire her form as she slinks into her seat.

"I don't exactly know where to go or who to go to. I'm afraid I'm in a very bad way," she says, opening up her handbag and pulling out a Virginia Slim. I hastily take my lighter out of my pocket.

"Thank you," she says, smiling warmly before taking a long drag and then a deep breath. I try not to smile back. "Anyway, somebody told me you could help me."

"Help you with what exactly?" Glen asks, eyebrow popped.

"Getting away from my boyfriend. He's crazy,"

I almost snort, but the seriousness of her voice and face prevent me from doing so. I control myself by hooking my thumbs under the straps of my suspenders. Glen's not as successful. He laughs outright.

"That's not the kind of work we do here," I say, sitting my cigar down in an ashtray.

Her brow knits. "What do you mean? Aren't you guys detectives?"

"Yes. _Police_ detectives. We're in the business of protecting civilians not managing _personal_ relationships," Glen says and his voice isn't particularly nice.

Neither is hers. "Well, what if I told you my boyfriend was Aiden Dennison?"

"Excuse me?"

Apparently Glen is as thunderstruck as me. "Aiden? Dennison?" he repeats/asks.

Now she looks a little smug, glancing at Glen. "Do I have your attention now?"

Honestly, she had it before but now she's got it in a whole 'nother way.

Aiden Dennison is our little town's most notorious criminal. He's single-handedly a one-man rise in crime, the head of a mastermind drug-smuggling ring and money launderer, and the worst part of it is we can never touch him. If anybody even gets close he sues them for slander…and wins. Or, the person turns up dead if he's feeling particularly nasty.

He's hot-headed, ill-tempered, and how he ended up with a catch like Spencer is completely beyond my realm of comprehension.

"What do you need?" I ask her and her head swivels to face me.

"Around the clock protection," she says, fully aware she's in the driver's seat. "I'll tell you everything you want to know in court. I just need to know when the smoke clears I'll still be okay."

Glen clears his throat. "We'll do everything we can to prot–"

"Duck!" I yell, diving into Spencer and knocking her to the floor a few seconds before the bullets start flying.

For the next few minutes all I can hear are gunshots, glass breaking, Glen swearing, and wood being blasted to splinters. Somehow, we manage to flip the desk onto its side, scrambling for cover behind it.

"Stay low!" I shout at Spencer before brandishing my pistol and shooting out into the night. Glen and I alternate, letting off only a couple of rounds before the car speeds off.

Glen, the wild cat that he is, pushes up off the floor and runs into the street, firing twice more at the now phantom vehicle.

"Save your bullets moron, they're gone," I say loudly, pushing myself off of the floor. I reach down to help Spencer up, who looks a little worse for the wear. She's paler, she has her lower lip sucked into her mouth, and she's shaking.

"Hey," I start, my voice softer than usual, "Are you okay?"

She nods, wrapping her arms around herself. I stand a little closer to her.

"Shit," Glen says, stepping through the now pane-less door. "The bastards got away."

I roll my eyes unknowingly being watched by Spencer, who laughs as a result.

"Call this in alright. And tell Cap I'm taking Miss Carlin here into protective custody."

--

"Here we are," I say, flipping on a light switch as I open my front door. "Home sweet home."

Spencer tentatively steps into my cramped apartment. I shrug off my jacket, throwing it onto my waiting loveseat. Within minutes I'm headlong into my nighttime routine, completely unaware of my company.

By the time Spencer clears her throat I've kicked off my shoes, pulled down my suspenders, and untucked and unbuttoned my dress shirt.

I don't think I've ever turned so red before.

And she notices.

"Don't mind me," she teases, holding up her hands. "Just carry on with the undressing."

If she didn't have that cute little smile on her-

"Ouch," I say, just now spotting the angry red mark on her elbow. "We should clean that up." I nod to it.

She rolls her elbow inward knowing exactly what I'm looking at. "Yeah, I think I got it when you tackled me," she deadpans.

"I was saving your life,"

"And bruising me,"

"Well, which do you prefer?" I ask, guiding her towards the bathroom. "A bullet or a bruise?"

"Um, is there a third option?"

"Alcohol?" I offer, holding up a plastic bottle of it. She looks wary.

"Don't you have anything else?"

"Afraid not," I sat, flipping down the toilet seat cover and gesturing for hear to have a seat. I grab a few tissues and perch myself on the edge of the tub in front of her. She looks like she's really dreading this but bravely holds her elbow out anyway. With her hat gone, her eyes stand out that much more, and now they're focused on the alcohol-soaked tissue.

"Hey," I say, gently taking her arm. "I'm not going to hurt you. I promise."

She holds my gaze then, even when I'm daubing the wound with the medicine. She hisses a little when I press a little harder but just like that we were done. I find a band-aid and wrap it over the injury, lightly rubbing my thumb across it when I finish.

She's still staring at me.

"So…you live alone?"

I lean away from her just barely. "Pretty much. Just me and Brian."

"Brian?" she questions, her eyebrows furrowed. I'm very tempted to smooth them out with my thumb but I refrain, letting out a loud whistle instead. Within seconds Spencer's staring nose to nose with Brian, my German Shephard.

"Hey boy," I gush, brushing my hands over his coat as he licks my face affectionately. "Did ya' miss me?"

He barks and I laugh as Spencer's eyes widen. "You look surprised," I tease and she actually blushes.

"I thought Brian was a guy," she mumbles sheepishly.

"I'm fairly sure he is. I mean, I could check." I pretend to lift Brian's paws and she holds her hands up.

"I meant male…human…like a human man, guy," she says, sounding increasingly flustered.

"No, I don't live with any men," I say, more seriously than I intended I think.

"No men, huh?" she asks, quirking an eyebrow. I think she gets it.

"No. No men," I repeat, still toying with Brian.

"That's nice," she comments, the words rolling off her tongue smoothly. There's something different about her voice when she's not speaking loud that makes her southern accent that much heavier.

I don't have time to dwell on it too long though. She stands suddenly, smoothing out her dress. "So where are you going to put me for the night Detective?"

I rise too, a little perplexed. "You're staying here."

She smiles at me, patient. "I meant where am I gonna' sleep?"

"Oh," I say, slapping my forehead. "Oh, right. Um, you can have my bed. I'll sleep on the couch or something."

"Oh no, I can't put you out of your own bed," she says, shaking her head slightly.

"You didn't. I did," I say easily with a smile. "I'll leave you alone to freshen up," I add, leaving the bathroom before she can protest further.

--

By the time she's come back out I've already changed the sheets on my bed, laid out a blanket and pillow on the sofa, changed into my nighttime attire, and laid out a little something for her.

Her curls have been brushed out, her hair looking naturally beautiful. Her face is void of make-up and her cheeks are scrubbed pink. She still looks beautiful and she has to stop that because she's turning me into a Neanderthal.

"Bed's in there," I say, pointing at my bedroom door like a moron.

She smiles and bites back a comment before walking in there never looking back at me.

I slump back onto the couch, groaning as I bury my face in my hands. Brian comes and places his head on my knees.

"That wasn't a completely stupid thing to do was it?" I ask him, like he'll understand and I swear he does because he gives me this rueful look.

"C'mon boy," I tell him, settling under the sheets and plopping my head down on the pillow. "Let's get some shut eye."

--

The door creaking open didn't startle me. Neither did the quiet footsteps moving across my carpeted floor.

No, I didn't move a muscle until I felt the hand on my shoulder, shaking me gently into consciousness.

I snorted a little as I woke up, my eyes finding hers in the dark – a feat that, quite naturally, caught me by surprise.

"I'm sorry Detective. I…I couldn't sleep," Spencer says, kneeling on the floor very near to where I'm sleeping.

I sit up slowly, blinking awake even more, inadvertently kicking Brian who I think may be snoring. "What's wrong?" I rasp out, my voice still sleep-rough.

"I can never sleep in a strange place, in a strange bed. Plus…I'm scared," she admits, her blue eyes almost shining with sincerity. "Will you…keep me company? Until I fall asleep?"

I don't think I was ever capable of saying no to her.

--

I follow this woman into my bedroom vaguely wondering why I feel so nervous. After all, she's shown no interest in me what so ever and apart from our conversation in my bathroom, I'm fairly certain that she has no idea about my sexual preference. Not that I'd tell her.

It's easier to keep things like that to myself.

Still, the fact remains that I can't shake the butterflies I feel crawling in bed next to Spencer Carlin.

I finally settle in, lying on my back and staring at the ceiling. I feel Spencer turn so that she's lying on her side, facing me.

She chuckles a little, drawing my attention towards her. "What's so funny?" I ask.

"I don't think I've shared a bed with another woman since I was little," she says, keeping her eyes on me.

"Oh yeah?" I ask, shifting so that I'm facing her as well, head propped up on my hand.

"Yeah. My cousin actually, although I should probably say we were both girls,"

"You must have been a really pretty little girl," I say before I think about it really.

She smiles at me, and it's at once disarming and enchanting. "Mmm hmm. Too bad I'm such a troll now."

"That's not what I meant," I rush to say.

"I know," she assures me, calming me with a raised brow. "I know exactly what you meant."

--

We must've fallen asleep some time after that, or I must have. I don't remember actually watching her fall asleep. I just remember her smile and dancing eyes.

I wake up at a little past two in the morning moving slightly before I feel her arms tighten around me.

She's wrapped herself around me like a second skin.

I can't really think about how uncomfortable it should make me but it feels too good to care.

She moves then, her face snuggling into my neck further, then she stops. "Oh my goodness," I hear her murmur, trying to pull away from me. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," I say, trying to find her eyes.

She's already sitting up, removed from me entirely. I can see her shaking her head over and over. "I really didn't mean–"

"It's okay Spencer," I repeat, touching her arm slightly, feeling somewhat bold. "There's nothing to be sorry for."

She murmurs something that I don't catch because her head is still down. "Pardon me?"

She finally brings her head up to look at me and I can feel myself burning from the inside. "I said 'Not yet'."

I can feel my brows crease even before I start speaking. "What does–" I start to see before literally having my breath taken away. Not only is Spencer kissing me but her elbow kind of connected with my ribs, knocking the air out of me.

I'd be an idiot to stop her though and I've done enough idiotic things tonight.

I'm harboring the girlfriend of a well-known notorious gangster. I've gone against police protocol and procedure which could possibly result in me losing my badge. I'm also kissing a woman who I have no idea is straight or not and it seems like she has no intention on stopping.

I should stop her right. It'd be idiotic not to, for all the reasons I just listed above.

Oh well, what's one more thing.


	29. Nerds

"God, this is so lame," Glen whined, rolling his eyes. "Why are we here?"

"We're showing your sister support. It's just like when we go to your basketball games Glen," Arthur told the boy, who merely sighed wearily and slunk even lower in his seat.

Spencer was nowhere near them but she heard the conversation.

That's how quiet it was in the gymnasium.

Because this was chess and you needed quiet to concentrate in chess.

Still, it stung a little that her older brother didn't want to be there.

Spencer pushed her glasses further up on her nose as she waited for her opponent to make his move.

Randall McNally.

The boy was barely five-feet tall, had an overbite out of this world, and wore glasses thick enough to fry a slab of bacon in the sun.

By any standards, he was a nerd - a nerd that was destined for Harvard - but still a nerd.

He'd beaten her the two previous times they'd met up, but this time she would be victorious because she had a new strategy, the King's Cross.

All she had to do was wait on his last move…

"Queen to Rook 4," Randall stated confidently, moving his pieces and snatching her rook away.

It was her favorite piece but the sacrifice had to be made.

"Knight to Bishop 2," she said, moving the little horse to the appropriate square, beaming confidently, waiting for the pieces to fall into place for Randall.

The boy deflated faster than a helium balloon in the cold as he dejectedly knocked his King over, signaling the end of the game.

Spencer was victorious.

The girl stood as the official (the school's chemistry teacher) rose her hand in victory. Her hair hung in her face as the few members in the audience clapped, mostly because they were glad it was over, but some were genuine. Including the peakish looking brunette who sat in the corner, removed from everyone.

Spencer didn't see her though; she was too busy burning a hole in the ground.

--

"That was truly awesome Spencer," Clay said, on the ride home. He ran a finger along the engraving at the bottom of her trophy. "You might even break my record."

She chuckled dork-like, a little snort the exclamation. "Gosh, Clay. I don't think I could ever do that."

"Well, I think if anyone's gonna break Clay's record, it should definitely be another Carlin," Paula said, glancing back at the kids through the rear-view mirror.

"So where do you kids want to go to celebrate?" Arthur asked.

"I wanna-" Glen started.

"Although I said kids Glen, I was actually only talking to Spencer,"

"Crap," Glen muttered. "She's just gonna pick someplace stupid."

You could almost see Spencer crawling into her sweater/shell.

"We can go where Glen wants," she said softly, averting her eyes from those of her parents.

Glen let out a little "yes" before a hard elbow from Clay changed his mind. "Nah, it's your day Spence. You pick?"

"Bowling?" she said/asked hopefully.

"Sounds like a plan," Arthur said.

--

The bowling alley was rather empty on a Wednesday night, but that's what happens when sports are the main priority at your school. Every other non-athletic event gets pushed to weekdays.

Not that Spencer minded. It's why she liked the bowling alley actually.

"Aww man," Glen grumbled, watching another one of his balls tail off into the gutter.

This was another one of the added benefits of bowling. Not only was she good at it.

But her brother, Superstar Glen, _sucked_ at it.

"You'll get it next time," Paula said, patting his should patronizingly as he sulked, waiting for his next turn.

Spencer couldn't help tittering a bit at his perpetual scowl, even going so far as to let out a little snort.

She readied for her turn, eyes focused on the little white pins as her fingers got situated in the little holes. Before she could let go, though, a bowling ball – airborne mind you – nearly obliterated the poor girl. Nearly, only because the ever omniscient Clay yelled "Look out!" just before the thing hit her mid-section.

Luckily, she wasn't a complete klutz and managed to remain upright…for a little while.

Soon enough, her legs wobbled comically before finally giving way, making her fall on her butt – hard.

Grimacing, Spencer's eyes followed the trajectory of the attacking bowling ball back to its origin where she just happened to find two girls staring at her. One, the shorter one, was grinning slyly, glancing at the girl standing next to her and Spencer. The other had her hands covering her mouth, eyes wide as saucers.

She was cute.

Shaking that thought from her head though, Spencer pushed herself off of the ground and bravely, for her, stomped over to the girls. But, midway there her stomp faded and by the time she'd reached them her head was to the floor and her feet shuffled along clumsily.

She did, however, take notice of the taller girl glaring at the shorter one as hard as she could…while hyperventilating.

Still looking at the floor, Spencer ventured to speak, but found someone beat her to it: the shorter girl. "Oh, hey, sorry about the ball and everything. I just suck at bowling," she said, still patting the taller girl on the back. Spencer looked up just then and saw that the taller girl had righted herself somewhat, still slumped over slightly.

"My name's Kyla, by the way. I wouldn't really be here only it's our sister night and _Ashley_ here," she nudged the taller girl forward just a bit. "Really likes to bowl. Say hi Ashley."

"Hi," the older girl mumbled out, looking devastatingly shy and pretty much embarrassed. She pushed up her glasses on her nose and glanced everywhere but at Spencer.

"So, I'll just leave you two to get better acquainted." And with that the bubbly brunette was off, ignoring the death glares her sister was giving her.

Which left Spencer to stare at her shoes and Ashley to stare at her hands.

Engaging.

Spencer surprised herself for the second time this evening though by speaking first…kind of.

She coughed.

Ashley's head snapped up immediately. "Are you okay?" she asked, again adjusting her lenses.

"Oh, uh, yeah," Spencer replied, croakily. "I'm fine."

"That's good,"

Again with the silence.

"So, uh, you like bowling huh?" Ashley ventured, playing the bold one this time.

"Yes, I do. Very much actually," Spencer admitted, smiling somewhat. "I don't ever get to come as often as I'd like to though."

"I don't either. My sister doesn't like it very much," Ashley said, feeling a little at ease now. "I saw your match."

"You saw my…" Spencer trailed off, not understanding. And then the pieces fell into place. "My chess match."

"Yeah," Ashley smiled, her nose crinkling as she grinned full-on. Now, there was a reason for why those glasses always stayed out of place. "I'm a big fan. I've seen all of your matches."

"Really?" Spencer was not not surprised by these developments. She wasn't aware of anyone but her family and the chess club at the events. Still, it warmed her heart to know that she had won the admiration of the brunette.

"Yes, really. I saw the match earlier. King's cross." Ashley nodded approvingly. "Excellent strategy."

Spencer flushed something fierce, yet, before she could reply she was railroaded, by her brother. "Hey dorkus. Who's the geek?" Glen asked, eyes on Ashley even as Spencer flailed comically to maintain her balance.

"She's not a dork," Ashley bravely…well, stuttered, eyes low but still managing to place a hand on Spencer's forearm for balance.

"Was I talking to you?" Glen said, obviously dismissive of the other girl. Sure he spoke to Spencer, but another lame wad was bordering on insolence. "Man, Spence. You gotta get better friends."

"And you'd better quit being rude to my sister," Kyla (miracles of all miracles) had re-emerged and was prepared to throw down with the eldest Carlin if need be.

"Kyla?!" The boy was incredulous. "Kyla Davies? This…" He gave Ashley the once-over – loafer-ed feet, straight leg trousers that were bordering on too short, a polo shirt, and some kind of hideous vest atrocity – not really liking or disliking what he was seeing. "…is your sister?"

"Yes _she_ is," Kyla stated, still furious, wrapping a protective arm around her older sister's shoulder. You'd never know by her behavior that she was the youngest though. "And, you're the loser for thinking she is one dickwad."

Glen's shoulders slumped, but he recovered quickly. "Whatever. C'mon Spence," he growled, grabbing her hand and pulling her away. "It's time to leave this crap hole anyway."

Spencer glanced fleetingly at the girls – Ashley looked near tears and Kyla…Kyla just still looked cross. There was nothing she could do though, and even though she was "making friends" she was fairly certain that she'd overstepped some major boundary by abandoning a bowling game her family had only embarked on for her sake.

Placing her rented shoes on the counter, Spencer was startled when a pair (almost exactly her size) were slammed down right next to her. Glancing to her left she saw the most extraordinarily dazzling smile she'd ever laid eyes on, and it belonged to one Miss Ashley Davies.

"Are you leaving?"

"Yep. Kyla is ready to go now, but…she thinks I should give you this," Ashley said, producing the smallest piece of paper imaginable and holding it out to her on a shaky palm.

Spencer reached out to grab it, missing a couple of times because her hand-eye coordination was off just now for some reason. Probably because her glasses were fogging up. Once she finally held the slip in her hands, she realized it was a phone number. Her curious gaze met Ashley's…hairline as the brunette was once again looking at the floor. "It's our house number," she barely heard muttered. "If you want it."

Spencer smiled adorably, somehow finding the courage to place trembling fingers on a downcast chin, bringing spectacled eyes to look into her own. "I want it," she breathed out, shocking herself. "I'll call you as soon as I get home."

Ashley grinned ridiculously hard and Spencer let out a light chuckle when she mirrored it.

Yeah, they'd probably be the most unpopular kids in school, but then again, popularity is overrated.


	30. Oh, Em, Gee: A Meet and Greet

**Oh. Em. Gee. A Meet and Greet**

**Umm....Rated-R?**

**--**

"Spence, you ready?" Emily asks as she knocks on my bedroom door. Tonight's the night of the concert and I couldn't be any more nervous, anxious, excited, and nauseous at the same time. I, Spencer Carlin, get to meet the AD band. Not just the lead singer, but the whole entire band.

Suddenly my clothes look too plain for the concert. The bassist is super hot and I wanna dress to impress. I mean, if I can get a hook up, that'd be super great. "No," I reply flatly. My fingers graze across every single shirt I have in my closet.

So many choices, so little time.

"You are aware that we have to get downtown in two hours to get your pass, right?" Emily questions, sticking her head into my closet. I'm sure she can see the piles of clean clothes thrown about on my floor.

I can hear her stifle a giggle as she walks in. "Yes, I know that," I snap back at her. Our eyes connect and I glare as she smiles.

Ugh.

I hate that she knows just how to push my buttons.

"What's taking you so long then?" She bends down and picks up one of the numerous AD Tour band shirts I have saved up for just this occasion. "And why the hell are you wearing boy shorts and a sports bra?"

"Because I can't decide what to wear!" I raise my voice as I snatch my shirt from her grasp. I run my fingers over each of the band member's faces and stop at the bassist. Oh yeah. I'm so fucking excited to meet them. Bored with the shirt, I toss it behind me onto the floor.

Emily's fingers wrap around my left wrist and turn me toward her. "You, need some help, Carlin." I'm not entirely sure if she was joking with that statement…

"You would know, Newman," I growl in response. Yeah, not so much intimidating, but at least I get my wrist back. I turn and glance once again at my clothes. They are _still_ too boring. But I have to choose one…

Out of the corner of my eye, I see Emily grab my dark blue AD shirt and light blue skinny jeans. She shoves them at me. "Get dressed now, or we'll be late and you won't get to meet AD."

I roll my eyes. "Whatever." I push past her and exit my closet. Well, this wouldn't be the first time I came out…

"Five minutes!" Emily shouts at me. I hear my bed squeak as she sits on it, waiting for me.

--

Oh. My. God. Oh em gee. Ohmigosh! I can't believe that we're here. I honestly can't believe that I, Spencer Carlin, am at the most anticipated concert of the year. This can't be happening. I pinch my arm and wince slightly. Oh, this is real alright. And I am standing outside the box office waiting to get my pass to meet The AD band. Fuck, I'm nervous.

"Calm down Spence," Emily whispers in my ear. What? Was I like hyperventilating too? I could very well have been. "Stop bouncing up and down!" She whispers harshly. Oh, that's what I was doing.

"I can't help it!" I reply in the same tone. "I'm really nervous. And you know that I bounce when I'm nervous."

Emily chuckles at me. "Well stop. People are going to think that you're on drugs or something." I can feel her breath against my ear but she's shouting. Well, the crowd is loud, so I can see why. But shoot, that's my ear. I have to listen to AD talk to me after the concert with that ear.

"Fine," I deadpan. "But stop yelling in my ear!" I scream back over the loud shouting surrounding us. The line moves quickly and soon I find myself in front of the box office talking with the man inside.

"Name and ID?" He barks out at me, not even bothering to look up into my eyes.

I fish my purse for my license and hand it to the man behind the glass. "Spencer Carlin." I slide my license into the groove of the counter to the man.

His face turns up to look at me to compare the license to my face. "Here." He shoves my ID back through the groove. He turns to his left and looks through a box of envelops. He sifts through them, finally stopping at one near the front. I see my name in the center of the front. It's pushed into the groove toward me as he screams, "Next!" in my ear.

I scramble to grab the envelope and exit the line, which isn't hard considering I was pushed out of the way by the girl behind me. I eye the paper in my hands. This envelop holds the vein of my existence. The very reason why I… "Let's go to our seats!" Emily shouts at me, breaking my thoughts.

Emily pushes through the crowd, parting them like she's some sort of weed-whacker or something.

Pretty useful if you ask me.

Some AD fans can be pretty rowdy.

Our seats are first row center. Yeah, I'm just that good. The stadium is packed. I think that a few people are standing out in the hall listening in, and even more outside straining their ears just to hear.

Yeah, those poor losers.

You can hear everyone talking about something, but me and Emily, we're silent and patient. Okay, not so patient.

We're still freaking out.

The lights dim, the audience quiets down and we strain to hear their footsteps as they walk onto the stage. Background music plays overhead just loud enough that we can't hear them tuning their guitars at the last minute.

There's a low hiss coming from both sides as a stream of fog shrouds the stage as the curtains are pulled back. And the crowd erupts in cheers.

It's finally begun.

The day that I have been waiting for my entire life.

Drums first, then the guitars come in as we wait for the lead singer to start singing.

The voice is a little raspy as they sing. Maybe that's because they've been touring for the past two months… oh well. I don't care. They still sound so amazingly awesome! Their first single, _Never Meant To_, fills everyone's ears and I swear that the building is shaking. Not one person is sitting down, we're all jumping and screaming and waving at them.

As the music fades, the lead singer sets the mic onto its stand. We all scream super loud to praise them. "Thank you, Chicago!" he screams into the mic, raising his hands above his head. All the girls screech loudly. His muscles are showing through his tight black wife beater.

Frankly, I could care less about him. My eyes are on the bassist wearing tight black jeans and a very revealing low-cut shirt. Now that's my type of musician. "Now, I know you guys have been waiting for that surprise we promised you." His voice is soft even though the crowd is super loud. "We have Pete and Patrick from Fall Out Boy here to sing a song with us tonight."

On cue, both boys enter from the left side of the stage, Pete with his guitar and Patrick with another mic. "Here's _Chicago Is So Two Years Ago_, just for you guys!" Aiden Dennison, lead singer and founder of AD screams into the mic in his hand.

The music starts up and everyone screams louder, if that's even possible. My eyes follow Pete as he crosses the stage, doing those moves he always does. Those cool ones, ya know. He plays around Brandon on drums for a little before moving to the bassist.

Ashley Davies.

The girl that has stolen my heart.

Pete moves in between us and moves quickly, and I swear our eyes catch. And she…winked at me. No, couldn't be. It's probably the lights or something. But wait…why did she look back again? Holey cheese! That's awesome! Her mouth moves as she sings along with the lyrics and I catch this part, "_There's a light on, in Chicago. And I know I should be home_."

I could have nearly fainted. It's like she was singing to me.

--

Everyone has filtered out of the stadium and a select few of us have been ushered into a room backstage.

I'm in the very back, of course.

Only because I'm super nervous.

Their manager said it was some sort of small party or whatever. Mingling is involved and encouraged.

I'm screwed.

AD is already in the room, most are chatting with others, and some are tuning their guitars. And by some, I mean Ashley Davies. They turn and greet us and I see Aiden walking over to me. Well, doesn't surprise me. I'm one of the few girls in here and the rest were immediately taken by the drummer, Brandon, lead guitarist, Adam, and Pete and Patrick got the rest, leaving me, waiting to be picked up by someone, who just happened to be Aiden.

"Hey there," he cooed, stepping up to me. His arm wrapped around my shoulders as he led me back to the couch. He sat down first and motioned for me to sit down next to him. Suddenly we were flocked by two other girls, one sat on the arm of the couch and the other sat on his lap. Both played with either his hair or arms.

Ugh.

Disgusting.

Me, on the other hand, I had something more wonderful to see. Just past Aiden's head was Ashley Davies, tuning her guitar. "So, does a beautiful lady like you have a name?" Oh, that was Aiden. I just nod my head, not even bothering to look at him. "What would that be, beautiful?"

"Spencer Carlin," I whisper in response. But it's not like Aiden heard me, because I've walked over to Ashley. Her head whips up from her guitar as soon as I wrapped my fingers around the neck of it.

"Could you please let go of Juliana? She's my favorite." Her raspy voice sounds so beautiful as it rings in my ears.

"Is this your first guitar?" I ask stupidly. Of course it is. I know just about everything about Ashley Davies and every other member of AD. It's called being a number one fan.

"And this is your first AD concert," Ashley points out, setting her guitar on the ground, gently leaning it up against the wall beside her.

I furrow my eyebrows together. I don't get it, how'd she know? "Why do you say that?"

A smirk crosses her lips. "Because you're still talking." She stands up and wraps her fingers around my wrists. She drags me into a dark hallway away from the party.

"Ashley," I moan softly. I can feel her lips pressing roughly against my neck. Her fingers toy with the bottom of my shirt, teasing me. Then she rips it off of me, throwing it somewhere, I really don't care. All I care about is that Ashley's lips are against mine again.

The sound of metal confuses me. I pull back from the kiss and see a mischievous look on her face. From behind her back, she produces a pair of handcuffs. I swallow hard, knowing just what she wants to do. "Can I?" she asks softly, a little bit hesitant.

I lean forward just a little to capture her lips in a chaste kiss. "Yeah," I breathe out against her lips.

"Are you--" I cut her off with another kiss to let her know just how I feel. She pulls back, gently pushing me down onto the couch. She raises my hands above my head and cuffs the right one before wrapping the handcuffs around a spoke of the couch and cinching the other end around my left wrist.

Her lips crash down on mine with passion and need. Her fingers roam my bare stomach at the top of my jeans. "Ash." A soft breath escapes my lips when she pulls away. I don't want her to pull away. Why did she pull away?

Ashley's hands fidgeted with the button of my jeans, undoing it, and pulling the zipper down in the same motion. So that's why she pulled away. I could deal with that. She lets out a soft gasp as she pulls my pants down.

I look down at her to see that she's biting her bottom lip in anticipation. I squirm under her fingers that are dancing around my center. She smirks at me when my hips buck toward her hand in an attempt to get more contact. "Don't move," she demands softly.

Her fingers gently cross my center, just barely. I will myself not too move, afraid of what might happen if I didn't do what she wanted. Her body slides down and she places heated kisses in a trail down my stomach.

I long to have my fingers thread into her hair, press her head closer to my throbbing center. "Ashley, please." I am really not above begging. Her fingers are teasing my entrance and her tongue is circling my clit. This is just pure torture. What's even worse is that she chuckles at me. I only know this because I can feel it against my skin.

I feel two fingers enter me and my breath hitches. Holy fuck.

"You like that?" she asks evilly. Her fingers don't move, they're just in there, not moving. That's just evil and I didn't even know I said that out loud.

I nod my head, my eyes still closed tightly. My back arches off the couch as she starts moving again. Her tongue is wonderful. God, I could so get used to this. She knows just how to touch me and when.

"Open your eyes," she pants. I strain to open them, but it doesn't work, they're shut too tightly. "Spencer, open them." Ashley's voice is a whole lot raspier now.

But her fingers have stopped moving. Got to get them going again. But how? Oh yeah, gotta open my eyes. As soon as I achieve that task, those soft, skilled and callused fingers resume their pace. I stay as motionless as possible, trying to obey her earlier request. It's really hard, having her sucking on my clit and her fingers pressing against the spot that drives me crazy. I'm so close to the edge right now that it's not even funny.

"Ah-Ash. Cl-close." My declaration falls on deaf ears as her fingers move quicker and press harder into me. She touches just the right spots that send me careening over the edge. My body stiffens before collapsing back down onto the couch after riding out the pleasure as much as Ashley would let me.

Her eyes connect with mine and she smiles that signature smile of hers and I can't help but smile back. Ashley's hand wipes away the stray strands of hair that were sticking to my forehead. "You okay?" Her voice is soft and full of concern.

"Yeah," I rasp out. I lean over and press my lips against her in a quick kiss. "Could you maybe…?" I wiggle my wrists to show that I want let out of my restraints. Ya know, it's really hard to not move when someone as…talented as Ashley is touching you.

"Sure." She chuckles at me before reaching into her jeans pocket for the key. Huh, prepared much? Oh well, it's not like I cared, I thoroughly enjoyed that escapade. I hear the clicking of the locks and feel her remove both before tossing the handcuffs onto the floor.

I snake my hands around her neck, pulling her into a deep kiss. She lies down on top of me, our bodies fitting just perfectly. And just as she was about to start something again, there's a loud knocking on the door.

"Ashley?! Are you in there?" Aiden. Of course.

Frustrated, Ashley pulls away from me and sits up. I follow suit, knowing just what's going to happen. "Yeah, Aiden, I am. What do you want?" She's clearly annoyed; as am I. She leaned down and picked up my discarded clothes, handing them to me.

"We have to leave in like five minutes!" he shouted through the door. Ugh. Guys and their stupidity.

Ashley smiled sadly at me. "Alright. I'll be out there in a second." She leaned over and pressed a soft kiss on my lips. "I'll see you around, Spencer Carlin."

As she was about to stand up to leave, I pulled her down for another quick kiss. "Can I maybe have your number?"

"You're not gonna stalk me, are you?" Ashley asked half-jokingly. I shake my head with a small smile. "Then sure." She walked over to the counter and pulled out a piece of paper from one of the drawers. She quickly scrawled down her number before handing the piece of paper to me. "See ya, Spencer."

"Bye Ashley," I replied softly, pressing the paper tightly against my chest.


	31. Left Behind

"Finally," Spencer murmured, flopping down face first onto her freshly made bed, the only part of her new room that looked room-y.

Every other inch of the place was covered in boxes, all marked _Spencer's Room_.

Funny how she could pack up fifteen years of life, stuff it in boxes, and transport it across the country to take up roots in a new place.

She'd chosen the room furthest away from anyone else. The previous owners' had finished the attic, turning it into a master bedroom of sorts and since Clay had allergies and Glen was a wuss, she won the funky space, hands down.

"Spencer?!"

"Yeah Mom?!"

"We're ordering pizza for dinner!" Spencer scrunched up her face. She's hated pizza for as long as she could remember and her first memory was watching Glen's pizza in reverse. "What kind of salad would you like?!"

"Just a regular garden! With Ranch dressing!"

"Okay!"

"Thank you!"

Spence relaxed back against the bed, delighted that that whole conversation took place without her having to so much as move.

Ah, the benefits of living an entire flight of stairs higher than everyone else.

Rejuvenated now, Spencer decided to explore her new bedroom some more…or the closet.

Ever since she was a little girl she'd had an infatuation with closets. It wasn't that she was afraid of some unspeakable creature that could emerge from them. She actually liked all a closet entailed, what they stood for. They held your secrets. Be it, dirty laundry that you'd just scooped off the floor because Nana made a surprise visit or the shards of glass from that time you and your brother broke the garage door window hosting your very own Home Run Derby. They kept memories; old diplomas and pictures, capturing moments of your life in tiny frames for an eternity. And last, but certainly not least, they made the best hiding places.

Apparently the previous owner thought so too because when she stood on her ottoman to inspect the top shelf, she stumbled upon a small notebook, the words, _Ashley's Diary_ scribbled across the front of it.

Of course she assumed it was empty, otherwise it wouldn't have ever been left behind. But it wasn't empty, and she couldn't stop herself from reading, the loopy yet elegant cursive very appealing to her eyes…almost hypnotic.

First entry:

_January 12, 2005_

_Dear Diary,_

_Well…not exactly sure what I'm supposed to be writing in here. Today's my 12__th__ birthday and for some reason my dad gave it to me, you to me I guess. Maybe I should start by telling you a little about my parents. They're pretty cool…for parents I mean. My dad's a dentist which is like the worst profession in the world. Plus, he's always making my friends floss after eating anything over our house. It's very embarrassing. My mom is a teacher at the local high school …a math teacher. So, basically they're the most hated people in our neighborhood. Luckily, that hasn't transferred to me yet. My best friend Madison is obsessed with this new boy-girl Aiden and honestly speaking, he is pretty cute. He's just not…let's put it this way, I don't forget how to talk, or get butterflies, or giggle like a little girl when I'm around him. I guess he's not my type._

"Spencer?!"

"Yes?!"

"Food's here!"

Damn.

--

"Meet anyone interesting at school today Spence?" her mom asked, setting down a bowl of freshly baked and buttered rolls.

_A few people, _she thought with a smirk. Ashley's diary read like a book, and it didn't hurt that the girl was insanely popular. Spencer knew everybody before they even opened their mouths, including Aiden and Madison.

"I saw her talking to some guy," Clay said, grinning slyly as he nudged Spencer.

"Oh, a _boy_," her mom said, eyes getting as wide as saucers. "But what about-"

"It's nothing serious," the girl dismissed quickly, spooning some vegetables onto her plate.

That Aiden boy just thought she was pretty or so he said. He was laying it on pretty thick actually. But she really wasn't concerned with him.

Her mind was really preoccupied with the picture in the school's trophy case of the cheerleading team.

Last year's championship team.

The championship team co-lead by Ashley Davies.

The girl was just as captivating in still life as her words, her face radiant in the frozen frame.

Her eyes on Spencer.

Okay, not really but she was focused on the lens of the camera so it looked like she was looking at Spencer.

Spencer didn't mind.

--

Ashley's diary got pretty interesting pretty fast. The girl, it seemed, in spite of all her presumed normalcy was a bit of a wild child.

_Dear Diary,_

_So Madison and I totally went to get tattoos today and she completely wimped out on me and didn't get one. Well, not a real one. I don't think a tiny speck on your lower back counts even if you do call it a "Period". I, however, nearly passed out getting mine, but once it was over, it was so awesome. Here's a picture._

_I think I was still a little amped from the ink or something and went a little overboard with the piercings. But, they're awesome too. My tongue's kinda swollen though. _

_I know I said I wouldn't but I finally broke down and started dating Aiden. He's not so bad to look at and, as Madison never fails to point out, any girl would kill for him. He is okay to talk to though, mainly because he listens and I like to talk a lot. He's pretty funny too. And he gets good grades, goes to church, and is the starting point guard of our school's basketball team. _

_Okay, so he's the perfect guy but for some reason I'm not ga-ga over him. Plus every time we kiss I get the distinct impression that he's trying to devour an ice cream cone. I dunno…maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm_

Snoop Dogg's "Drop It Like It's Hot" interrupted her reading and Spencer nearly jumped off her bed.

Eric was calling.

Eric: her boyfriend from back home that she was also not ga-ga over.

She didn't think they'd last long.

_--_

_Dear Diary,_

_Did I ever tell you that alcohol was my friend? If I haven't then I'm telling you now._

Ashley never had the time to finish that last entry in her diary. Apparently, someone had rudely interrupted her too, or so Spencer mused.

Now, though, there would be **no** interruptions. Not when Spencer was feigning sleep, the lights off in her room.

She was actually in her closet, under a makeshift tent; constructed of a blanket being perched up on the backs of two chairs. There the girl laid, a flashlight illuminating the familiar script scrawled across the page.

_I kissed a girl for the first time tonight._

_It wasn't anything too extraordinary and I probably won't remember it tomorrow, but, for right now, it's all I can think about._

_Aiden dragged me out to that Highland party that I really didn't want to go to, but he had to make an appearance seeing as he was the star player on our team. And, since I was his girl, I had to be in attendance as well._

_Madison was excited about it, but that's no shocker. She's always up for anything that involves liquor and dancing. _

_We weren't having that bad of a time, and after a few drinks Aiden starts to look a lot more appealing to me than he usually doesn't. That's probably why I like the alcohol so much, it helps to drown out the feelings and thoughts I'm trying to keep to myself._

_Anyway, back to the party. There were a bunch of dumb guys I'd never be caught dead hanging out with and a few of the girls from the squad. I don't think they like me that much, but since I'm best friends with Madison, co-leader of the squad, and dating Aiden, they have to make nice at least. Aiden was almost falling over drunk by the time someone suggested a game of spin the bottle. _

_I thought it sounded pretty lame, because what are we? Toddlers, but unfortunately I'm peer pressure's bitch these days so I go along with it._

_I instantly regretted it, having to make out with both Corey Snyder and Jamie Johnston, both of whom had an intact record for going the most days with having bad breath. The night had truly taken a turn for the worse, when I was forced to watch Madison ram her tongue down my boyfriend's throat. _

_Sure, I don't like him and all but he is still mine._

_Then it was Madison's turn to spin and the bottle landed on me..._

"No way. Nuh uh. Not gonna happen," Madison was vehement in her refusal to go through with it.

"Quit being annoying Madison," Corey said, rubbing his chubby hands together. "Rules are rules. And the rules say you kiss who the bottle points at. No questions asked."

"But I can't kiss Ashley," Madison squealed. "She's like my sister or something. It'd be incestuous."

"But she's not your sister," Sherry, another girl on the squad said, taking hold off Madison's shoulders and shoving her towards Ashley. "So, it works out."

Ashley merely sat there, her stomach clenching over and over again with nerves. Why…she couldn't quite place, but, subconsciously, she totally could and that's why her body was freaking out.

"Ugh fine. Whatever," Madison grumbled, sitting directly across from the girl. "But if I go to hell, it's so on you guys."

Ashley kept her eyes on Madison's, drowning out all of the chanting and cheering going on around them. She ignored the guffaws and the playfully yet carefully constructed light barbs thrown in Aiden's direction.

No, she couldn't see or hear any of it. It was all a dull drone…and it disappeared completely the moment Madison's lips touched her own.

_It didn't last that long. Seconds at best, but when Madison pulled away painfully slow, I felt like something settled in me._

_Like, it was finally okay to breathe or something. _

_I don't know, I'm probably not making much sense. Drunken rambles or whatever, but kissing Madison, how that felt, I, it just felt right._

Spencer finally let out the breath she was holding.

--

"Mom? How did you know you really liked Dad?"

It was an unprecedented question, when she finally asked her mom, but if Spencer couldn't do anything else, she would answer that question for Ashley.

_Dear Diary,_

_It's been three weeks since that incident and I think…I think I'm changing. _

_It's hard now, in the locker room, changing with everybody else. I find myself staring for far too long. And, when someone catches me, I use the heat as an excuse for my flushed cheeks._

_Twice, I caught myself staring at Madison's lips and twice, I realized almost too late what I was doing._

_And, Aiden…Aiden wants to have sex. But, I really don't want to do that. I'm like the last girl on the squad who hasn't lost their virginity, but I don't want to waste it, especially on someone I'm not really into._

_I tried asking my Mom about it, and she told me that Love was something you worked on. People like each other and love comes after. But, I hope that isn't the case._

_I mean, how do we know if we really like someone anyway?_

"It's hard to say Spencer," her mom answers, still busily washing dishes.

Spencer paused before asking. "I mean, did you love him, right away?"

Her mom's hands still. "Not right away…but your father grew on me. He was easy to talk to. And then, then I realized how unbelievably happy he could make me."

"Didn't he already make you happy?" Spencer asked, her voice laced with innocence.

Her mom turned to her and smiled at her, her face awash in calculated care. "Yes, but I realized being with him would make me happier."

_Dear Diary,_

_I slept with him._

_Aiden that is._

_With the peer pressure coming from all fronts, how could I not? Madison said I should just go ahead and get it over with, because there's never gonna be a right time. Plus, Aiden has been really sweet, even if he does annoy me._

_Anyways, it was…gross. No one told me sex would be so messy, and painful. _

_Why the hell is everyone so excited about it?_

_Anyway, now he's around me all of the time and his presence has never annoyed me more. He wants to do it again, but I'm not too fond of _that_ idea. I didn't enjoy it the first time, but I guess it's like most things. It gets better with practice._

_Oh well. One can only hope._

_Anyway, he's on his way over here tonight. We're having dinner with my parents and then we're going out afterward. I'm glad that at least we'll be in a public place. Maybe then he won't get too touchy._

Spencer read this last entry holed up in her room on a Saturday night.

That Aiden guy was really persistent though, and she almost, _almost, _agreed to go out with him tonight. But cooler heads prevailed, plus, if she was really honest with herself, she'd admit that she preferred even the written words of his ex to the actual live interaction with him.

But she wasn't that bold. Not yet, at least.

So instead, with her family away and having the house to herself, she curled up with a blanket and a Mountain Dew, she preferred to re-read (for the fifth time) Ashley's most interesting entry to date.

_Dear Diary,_

_I did something really crazy last night._

_Which, you probably don't find surprising since I'm always doing crazy stuff. _

_I still say you can make it to Mexico on a half tank of gas though._

_Anyway, this more than tops that incident. Even that whole thing with Madison pales in comparison to this._

_I told you that I was supposed to be going out with Aiden, right? Well, after dinner, he had to go do something for one of his buddies and I was going to meet him at the club. This new place called Gray. I didn't mind too terribly because, as always, he was great with my parents. I think they're into him more than me. Plus, after being cooped up all week, I felt as if I deserved some reprieve._

_Well, he never showed, and I don't know, maybe it was the booze, but it made me feel super emotional. I started crying, AT THE BAR, when this girl showed up. But, she wasn't really a girl. More like a young woman. Her name was Maggie..._

"There is something really wrong with the world," she heard a voice say, not very far from where she was sitting, In fact, the person sounded disturbingly close.

Ashley's head shot up, her arms still folded on the counter, her face a puzzle of confusion.

"For someone like you to be sitting in this place…alone," the woman continued, eyeing Ashley with interest. She took a drag on her cigarette and let her eyes roam all the way up from Ashley heel-clad feet to her eyes…slowly. She let out the cloud of smoke as she spoke again. "You are? Here alone right?"

The question wasn't so much asked as it was drawled and Ashley had to swallow thickly before she continued. "I am. Well, I wasn't supposed to be. My, uh," and she faltered here, not quite sure why. "My, uh, date stood me up."

"Oh, well, they're an idiot," the woman smiled, and it was at once endearing and enticing. "I'd never let you out of my sight if you were with me."

There it was. Cards on table.

It was up to Ashley to flip them over. And, with a belly full of Jose's finest, flip them over she did.

"Dance with me," she said, dragging the woman off onto the dance floor.

Three hours later and they were at Maggie's. Her place in the hills paid for by her oil tycoon father. An asshole but a rich one so she couldn't entirely loathe him.

"Make yourself comfortable Ashley," she said, walking into the kitchen to get them something to drink.

And Ashley was comfortable, something she marveled about. A complete stranger was making her feel more at ease than Aiden had and she'd known him for years.

_I knew something was going to happen that night. And I knew that it was going to happen with Maggie…and that didn't scare me._

Spencer's breathing picked up as she read on.

_She came back out of the kitchen, her hair let down from its restrictive bun. I admired the way the hair cascaded around her shoulders, bouncing as she strode towards me._

Spencer tore her eyes away from the page to cast a side-long glance at a picture Glen had found, of Ashley. The girl's hair was pinned back, but it was still long enough that it reached her shoulders.

_She sat down next to me, handing me my glass but she set hers down on the table. She was sitting so close I could see the dangerously delicious glint in her eyes._

Ashley was looking directly at the camera, smile full, but there was something so playfully deviant sparking behind her browner than brown eyes.

_I didn't move away, though everything I had learned screamed to me that I should._

Spencer reached out a hand and traced the girl in the picture's outline, fingers lingering a little longer than necessary.

_And when she finally kissed me, I finally knew, without a doubt, that this was what I wanted. This was what I was running from, and this is what was me._

A lone tear fell from the blonde's eye.

_It wasn't rushed, it wasn't clumsy or awkward. No, our first time was gentle…sweet, hot, fun, and…just sensual. I hope I can do that for someone someday…_

Spencer hoped so too.

_--_

_Dear Diary,_

_We're moving._

_I think it's partly my fault but, since I'm no longer in denial about who I am, a lot of people have been being very mean to me. Not to mention that I've been abandoned by all of my "friends". Aiden's trying to keep it cordial, but even he doesn't want to stand up for me when I'm being te-_

"Umphf." Spencer dropped the diary and a few other books onto the floor.

"Oops," Aiden said, rushing to pick up her lost belongings. "I'm sorry Spencer. I wasn't looking where I was going."

"No, you weren't," she snapped. Inadvertent, of course, because Aiden didn't know she knew how much of a jerk he was to Ashley. She should be thanking him really.

"Hey, Aiden?" she asked, continuing when it was clear she had his attention. "Did you know Ashley Davies?"

His face paled and he fidgeted with his backpack straps. "Sure. Everyone knew Ashley," he finally answered, looking uncomfortable.

"Yeah. But, like, didn't you guys…" she trailed off, hoping he'd finish for her, but he just stood there looking like he might just throw up.

"I don't know what anyone's told you but I didn't…she wasn't…Look, I didn't make her…"

"Whoa. Aiden, Aiden, calm down," she said, fearing the boy might start hyperventilating. "It was just a question. Do you know where she moved to?"

"Uh yeah. Sure, Because, we used to be friends and all. So yeah,"

"Can I have her address?"

Aiden scribbled out the information as quickly as he could. "Yeah, well…I uh, gotta go," he squeaked out, hurriedly rushing by her.

She couldn't help but snicker.

--

"I'll be back in a second," Spencer told Clay, hopping out of the passenger seat.

She blew out a deep breath before walking up the walkway, ringing the doorbell, hoping against hope that the girl was actually in on a Saturday.

She heard the sound of a dog barking, a large dog, as the door was being unlocked.

"Cocoa, be quiet," the dark-haired girl grumbled as she opened the door a smidge, peering out. "Hello,"

"Hi," Spencer offered timidly, thinking instantly that she may have had a mistake but then Ashley's eyes brightened and she let out a relieved breath.

"Can I help you?" Ashley asked, opening the door wider.

"Well, I uh," Spencer lost her words. "You see…" The brunette chuckled.

"Spit it out," she smiled, leaning against the door jamb.

"Well, I found this," Spencer said, pulling the notebook out of her purse.

"Oh my God," Ashley gasped, snatching the word-filled pad away. "I thought I'd lost this forever."

Spencer's eyes lit up as she watched the girl hurriedly flip through the pages. "I figured."

"Thank you," Ashley said sincerely, smiling adorably at the blonde. Her nose crinkling exquisitely.

"No problem," Spencer replied, torn for a moment. Her job was done now. She'd returned the diary. Now, all that was left for her to do was turn around and go. "I'm, uh, gonna go," she rushed out, feeling so much like a chicken for backing out so easily. If only she were a little braver…like Ashley.

She was halfway down the walkway when a voice called out to her. "Hey!"

Spencer paused mid-stride and spun back around. "Yeah?"

"You wanna…hang out or something?" Ashley asked, scuffing a bare toe onto a rug placed in the foyer as she grounded her eyes.

Spencer's smile could not have been more brilliant. "Yeah," she said. "That would be cool."

--

**Review. It's good for you.**


	32. Lost in The Sands of Ti, I Mean, Egypt

-------------

"Oh come on! It'll be fun!" Ashley exclaimed, her hands wrapped around her sister's wrists as she jumped up and down.

Kyla simply shook her head, "Nope. No way. I can't even believe that _you_ want to go there." Her eyes fixated on her older sister's.

Ashley laughed, her head falling backward in the process. Kind of like a maniacal laugh, if you will. "It'll be fun! I can't believe that you don't want to go."

"It's all sand," Kyla shrugged, not seeing the appeal. There's plenty of sand in Los Angeles and they wouldn't have to divest a large sum from their inheritance to frolic in it.

"It's not_ all_ sand. They have cities, you know," Ashley chuckled. Her hands fell from her sister's wrists as she planted them onto her hips.

"They're probably all gross and sweaty and smelly," Kyla maintained, stepping back and falling onto the couch with a grunt. "And we'll probably have to bathe in a river or something."

Ashley gasped theatrically. "How awesome would that be?!" she asked, chuckling when Kyla fixed her with a cautious look. "I'm kidding." She followed her sister, plopping down onto the soft cushions and placing her hands on Kyla's knee. "They have plumbing," she assured the younger girl. "You've watched Aladdin one too many times."

Kyla just looked at her. "Aladdin was set in the Middle East Ashley."

Ashley rolled her eyes wearily. "Whatever. Just hit me with some more inane objections."

Kyla didn't even smile. "They wear all those robe thingies," she finally whispered, raising an eyebrow at her sister, daring her to counter her statement.

"They have _real_ clothes there," Ashley countered. "I'm sure that they dress just like you and me. And! And, they have really cool shops where you can get new clothes and jewelry and stuff."

Kyla's eyes widened. "New clothes?"

"Yup." Ashley nodded her head.

"New jewelry?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure?"

Ashley laughed. "Yes, I'm en_tire_ly sure."

"Then I am so there." Ashley laughed harder. "What? I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to get new clothes."

"And that's why I brought it up," Ashley slapped her sister's thigh before standing up. Kyla glared at the other brunette. And man, if looks could kill, Ashley wouldn't have made it two steps away from the couch.

"You are so evil, Ashley," Kyla hissed through clenched teeth.

Ashley smiled brightly at the younger brunette before exiting the living room for the kitchen. "That's why you love me!" She called through the door.

Kyla rolled her eyes. She'd have her revenge.

-----------

Spencer sat on her couch, her knees pulled up to her chest with her arms wrapped securely around them. _Signs_ was on tonight and Glen talked her into watching it saying, "Who could be afraid of the fake aliens?"

So she agreed. She'd seen it before, but tonight was a lot different than daytime, with your dad, who, as a police officer, was trained in three forms of combat. Tonight, it was storming and tree branches were slamming against the windows.

She was obviously freaked.

"Hey Spence?" Glen asked, just as soon as she returned to a somewhat normal position on the couch.

Spencer couldn't remove her eyes from the screen, no matter how much she wanted to. "Yeah?"

"You wanna go to Egypt with me and Clay?" the blonde boy asked, shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth. An odd question really but they were both too preoccupied with the movie to give much thought to that.

"Yeah, yeah. Sure. Whatever," Spencer replied, her hand waving in his general direction to make him shut up so she could watch.

Glen smiled brightly. "Sweet. We leave in two weeks."

Spencer mumbled something unintelligible right before shrieking loudly as the alien jumped down from the rooftop and into the cornfield.

-----------

"I'm not going," Spencer crossed her arms. She narrowed her eyes at her two older brothers.

"Oh, but you said that you would go," Glen gloated. His smile rivaled that of the Cheshire cat.

Spencer shook her head. "_No_. You caught me at the worst time. You know that I get so caught up in movies that I don't pay attention to anything else."

"That's exactly why he did it," Clay deadpanned, dragging his suitcase and backpack down the stairs to meet his siblings.

"You guys are pure evil," Spencer hissed. "I don't even have my bags packed. Guess I can't go," she smiled brightly though her tone was sarcastic.

Glen chuckled. "Clay and I did that for you yesterday. We knew you wouldn't want to go so we got you all ready," he smirked in triumph at his sister. "Now all you have to do is get into shorts and a t-shirt."

Spencer crossed her arms. "Make me."

Clay and Glen exchanged looks before advancing slowly toward their sister. "You really want us to?"

She raised her eyebrows at the boys. "Do it. I dare you."

"Alright," Glen shrugged, lunging forward and picking up Spencer, throwing her over his shoulder. "Clay, go get those hideous pink shorts and that old green shirt grandma gave her last year for her birthday."

Clay nodded his head before taking off up the stairs with Glen on his heel.

"Put me down!" Spencer pounded on Glen's back with her closed fists. "Glen!" she shrieked.

"Not until you get dressed," Glen reasoned.

"I got 'em!" Clay called out, stepping into the hallway with the aforementioned hideous clothing items.

Spencer's eyes bugged open. "You wouldn't dare," she challenged.

"Spence. I think we've already established the fact that we will." Glen poked her side, making her squeal and squirm in his grasp. "Grab her jeans and pull them off. But make sure you slip the shorts on quick. I don't want to see more than I have to."

Clay laughed, walking toward the blonde siblings, his hands poised to grasp her jeans. "Fine!" Spencer huffed.

"Good. You have five minutes. Or we're dragging you out to the car and to the airport," Glen said, setting Spencer back onto the ground. "Naked," he added for emphasis.

"Whatever," Spencer grumbled, scrambling into her bedroom to change.

-----------

"Oh Ash! Look at this!" Kyla screeched. She grabbed a gold bracelet from the table and waved it around in the air to get her sister's attention.

Ashley rolled her eyes. "This is the twenty-thousandth thing you've shown me, Ky. Why can't you, ya know, stop shopping today?"

Kyla covered her mouth with her free hand and let out a gasp. "Such blasphemy!" she breathed out. "Shopping is the only way you got me here, and I'm only going to shop. So deal with it or leave."

"You know our cell phones don't work over here. We have to stay together," Ashley said, grabbing her sister's wrist. "Now come on. I wanna ride the camels." She turned around and started walking away from the vendors, pulling her sister with her.

Only, she didn't get far. She collided, hard, with another person. She stumbled back into Kyla's arms. "Watch where you're going blondie," she spat out, her eyes catching the shock of blonde hair as she hit the ground. She stood up and wiped her clothes of the dust that had collected.

"You weren't paying attention either, ho," the blonde shot back. "And the name's Spencer," she added, her eyes boring a hole into the two brunette girls', actually they were more so tripping over Ashley's. After a few protracted moments she eventually pushed past the siblings in search of her own.

"What crawled up her ass and died?" Ashley asked, clearly foaming at the mouth, or drooling, depending on your perspective.

Kyla shrugged her shoulders, her attention back at the jewelry on the table.

Ashley rolled her eyes, grabbed Kyla's hand and pulled her away from the tables and toward the camels. "Come on."

-----------

"What took you so long?" Glen asked as soon as Spencer reached their determined meet-up spot. He noticed she looked kinda huffy so he attempted to ask her if something is wrong.

Attempted.

"Are you-"

Spencer's hand shot up to stop more words. "Some idiot with indecisive hair ran into me and then blamed me," she huffed out, beyond pissed.

Glen looked confused… understandably. "Indecisive… hair?"

She really didn't want to explain the brunette-ish, red with blonde highlights do that she'd already memorized for some reason so she shook the question off. "Doesn't matter. Where's Clay?"

"He's waiting for us at the camel area." Glen pointed behind his sister to the herd of animals.

"Let's go," Spencer hissed, still clearly miffed. Something Glen's arm understood entirely after being nearly wrenched from its socket.

-----------

"Oh no. Nope, I'm not riding with her," Spencer insisted. Her eyes scanned the girl in front of her in disgust. Okay, so she was hot, but there was no way that she was going to get on the same animal as _her_.

"It's not like I want to ride with you either," the brunette snipped in reply.

"Your opinion doesn't matter," Spencer hissed. "You practically ran me over and then blamed me for it."

"Ladies!" One of the handlers shouted, breaking the feud that was about to start between both girls.

Spencer and the brunette turned their eyes to the man. "What?!" they screamed at the same time.

"You must ride together. Or no ride at all," he explained as best as he could.

"Fine!" Spencer relented. "I get front though. I refuse to sit by the ass."

"You mean on the ass," the brunette corrected.

"No, I mean by the ass," Spencer said, smiling cheekily at the other girl.

The brunette rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Just get up there, Spen_cer_." She watched as the blonde girl climbed onto the back of the camel before doing the same. "My name's Ashley. Just so you know," she whispered into Spencer's ear.

Spencer's breath hitched at the warm air escaping Ashley's lips as it hit her ear. "Nice to meet you, Ashley," she muttered out, trying to stay focused.

Yeah, that didn't last too long.

The girls jerked forward as the animal stood up, Ashley's arms instinctively wrapped around the blonde's waist and gripped tightly as Spencer's fingers held on tightly to the animal's reins so that neither of them fell.

As soon as the animal was upright, Spencer relaxed her fingers and sat up. She chuckled when Ashley didn't loosen her grip. Instead, the brunette dug her face further into Spencer's back, her arms nearly suffocating the blonde.

"Hey, you think you can let go a little?" Spencer giggled.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, sure," Ashley whispered, her hands slowly moving from Spencer's stomach to her hips, gripping almost as tightly as before. She raised her head and looked behind her to find Kyla paired with an attractive male. "Of course," she whispered to herself.

"Of course what?" Spencer asked, her vision planted on one of the leaders as he slowly led the group toward the mountainous structure in front of them.

Ashley shook her head before leaning forward and burying her head into the blonde's shoulder, her arms snaking around her waist again. "Just my sister."

Spencer felt her breathing become shallower with the close, intimate contact between her and Ashley. She'd never felt this before with anyone. "What about her?" she asked, as smoothly as possible, which is to say not smoothly at all. It was more like, "Uh…um, what…er…what about her?"

"Her and guys. That's something I'll never understand," Ashley sighed, still unknowingly wreaking havoc on Spencer's senses.

"So you um…you don't like guys, I take it?" Spencer asked, finding Ashley's breaths hitting more on her skin than before.

Ashley shook her head again. This time her nose brushed up against the crook of Spencer's neck, taking in the scent of the girl in front of her. She smelled like cinnamon and vanilla and also a little like livestock feed but that was probably the camel. "Nah. I've found that girls are a lot more _interesting_."

"Interesting how?" Spencer asked. She swallowed hard when she felt lips pressing against her bare shoulder.

"Oh, you know. How their breath hitches when you touch them just right," Ashley mused, her fingers tracing circles on Spencer's stomach, causing the blonde's breath to hitch. "And how their breathing gets shallower when you kiss their neck." Again she smirked, pressing her lips to Spencer's neck, her prediction coming to fruition. Who knew camel hump riding was such a turn on?

"G—guys can do that too," Spencer breathed out. She was doing her best not to turn around and just kiss the brunette senseless. She had to pay attention to where they were going, or else they'd get totally lost.

Ashley let out a low chuckle. "They can. But with girls, you know just how to touch them, and they know _just_ how to touch you," she said, snaking her fingers underneath Spencer's shirt to play with the soft skin.

"Mmm. Is that so?" Spencer asked, just barely above a whisper. With the combination of the scorching heat and Ashley's sensual touches, she was finding it very hard to breathe.

Very…hard…to…

"Spence?" Ashley asked, gently shaking the blonde. When she didn't budge, Ashley started to freak out. "Hey! I need some help over here!" she called out.

One of the handlers guided his own camel over to the two girls, everyone else immediately following suit. "What happened?" he asked.

"I think she's hot." Ashley shook her head. "I mean the heat. She's…hot. I think it's because of the heat. I mean, one minute she's fine, the next her head is back up against my shoulder," Ashley explained as she helped the man remove Spencer from the animal.

Glen jumped off of his camel, not even bothering to let it lie down. "What did you do to my sister?!" he screamed in Ashley's face.

"I didn't do anything, douche!" Ashley yelled back. Sure she was small, but that never stopped her from beating up any guy that dared to pick a fight with her.

"Well obviously you did!" Glen pointed down to Spencer who lay unconscious on a towel on the sand. "Now what did you do?!"

Ashley laughed at him. "Have you ever thought that maybe it was the heat, dumbass?"

Glen narrowed his eyes at the small brunette girl. "Stay away from my sister," he hissed before squatting down next to Spencer.

"Only if she tells me to," Ashley shot back quickly. She watched as one of the handlers splashed cold water onto the blonde's face, making her come to.

"Ashley?" Spencer rasped out.

Ashley gave Glen a smirk before stooping down and taking Spencer's right hand into her own. "Yeah, sweetie?"

"You suck," Spencer choked out. She let out a small laugh at Ashley's expression, wide-eyed and confused. "You should probably let go of my hand so I can sit up though."

Ashley gave an uneasy laugh as she stood back up, waiting for the blonde to sit up on the towel. "Yeah, you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good," Spencer smiled up at the brunette. "Now don't do that ever again. Or you'll get it back ten times as bad."

"I knew you did something to my sister!" Glen accused, pointing his finger at Ashley.

"Shut up!" "Shut up, Glen!" Both Clay and Spencer yelled back at the blonde boy who slunk back into the crowd as Spencer stood up.

"Ten times as bad?" Ashley asked, quirking a brow at the blonde, looking smug. "I don't believe you Spen_cer_."

"You'd better believe it, Ash_ley_," Spencer said, giving the brunette a smirk of her own, their eyes locking for the briefest of seconds before Ashley collapsed down onto the sand.


	33. Oh, It's You

Ashley's hands gripped the mechanical device meant to pick up sound for the cameras as she held it above her head. Her ears donned headphones as she struggled to keep the bar out of view. She silently cursed herself for even trying to get into the movie industry. Sure, she knew it'd be a hard battle to get to the top. But she just didn't know that it was gonna be this hard.

"_Get those palm trees moved to Studio B, Davies!"_

"_Make sure the boom is out of the shot, Davies!"_

"Davies! Get ten bottles of spring water to Trailer Four!"

"_What's taking you forever, Davies?!"_

A sigh escaped her lips as she watched the scene unfold in front of her. The lead actress was supposed to shriek really loudly when the psycho killer pulled the doors to the bathroom stall open.

They'd done this scene twelve times already; each time causing Ashley to close her eyes and wince in pain at the high pitched scream. She just wanted to take off the headphones and man the boom without it.

"Cut!" the director bellowed from his seat behind the mini television set that was broadcasting the feed from the cameras at that very second. He flung his headphones off of his ears onto his shoulders as he stood up from his chair.

"That was perfect, Sasha." He praised the girl in the towel stepping from the makeshift shower in the not so real bathroom. _Of course he's nice_, Ashley thought, _she's in a fuckin' towel with nothing more. Pig-headed bastard._

She let out a scoff. Slowly, she lowered the boom and let the end rest next to her left foot. Ashley rubbed her arms with her hands as she tried to soothe her aching muscles. _Stupid sound boom._

"Davies!" One of the producers called out from his chair. _Lazy ass_, she thought. Ashley carefully rested the boom against the nearest wall that wouldn't cause it any damage. She turned around and made her way through the crowd to the man in the chair she called boss.

"Yes, Mr. Laurel?" Ashley breathed out. She brought her left hand up to brush a stray strand of hair back behind her ear.

The man raised his eyebrow at her appearance. Ratty, torn jeans coupled with a worn t-shirt that sported the saying, "Like What You See? Take A Picture And Frame It On Your Wall Then."

"I need you to go to Studio C and grab one more palm tree," he said monotone. His eyes never left her chest.

Ashley rolled her eyes and nodded her head. "Yeah, sure," she muttered. What she really meant was, "Yeah, pig. I'll get right on that so you can stare at my ass as I walk away."

As she turned and made her way to the back door closest to Studio C, she heard a soft groan from the male producers. _Yup, pigs for sure._

She pressed her hand to the door and thrust it open. Ashley squinted when the bright afternoon sunlight hit her sensitive, and clearly used to the dark, eyes. Her feet carried her to the Studio. She just wanted today's filming to end and she could go home. So she moved faster to the other Studio.

**-------------**

"No!" Spencer screamed. Clad in only a robe she stood in the middle of the set bedroom. Her facial expressions showed fear and terror. Her mind however was bored that her fellow actor just couldn't get his line down just right.

His mark was right in front of hers. His hands were on her arms, shaking her violently. Well, fake violently. We all know that it isn't real.

"I said, give me the damn money," he hissed into her face. His hands pressed harder into her arms, causing Spencer to shriek loudly in return.

"No!" Spencer lifted her right knee and shoved it between his legs, just barely missing his…package. His hands let go of her arms and she turned and ran to the door, slamming it behind her.

The man faked pain as he fell to his knees.

"And cut!" the director called out, dropping the headphones from his ears to rest around his neck.

Spencer re-entered the room with a soft chuckle. "Sorry Donny." She placed her hand on his shoulder, his hands still on his knees as he breathed heavily. "I didn't mean to."

Donny shook his head. He let out a sigh, finally standing up. "It's okay," he half squeaked. "Just clipped it. I'll be alright."

"Are you sure?" Spencer asked through a fit of giggles. She was slightly bent over from laughing.

"Yeah, pretty sure," Donny replied. He cleared his throat and shook his legs. "I'm alright."

Spencer sighed, her chuckles subsiding. "Okay. I'm gonna go to my trailer," she said softly. "Hey Steve! Get some water sent to my trailer! I need it!" Spencer called out to the director who in turn nodded his head.

And all the actors and producers stared as Spencer sashayed her hips while exiting the building. As soon as she reached the door, she rolled her eyes. She stepped out into the warm air and quickly made her way to her trailer. Hopefully no one would stop her for an autograph. That's just plain annoying.

**-------------**

Ashley's tiny arms wrapped around the large (and definitely real) palm tree. "Ugh. I thought he said this was plastic," she grunted, as she lifted the tree from its resting place in the very back corner of the Studio.

Slowly but surely Ashley carried the tree to the door. Thankfully, one of the other gofers opened the door for her.

How sweet.

Now she only had about two hundred feet to carry this. "I can do this." Ashley kept repeating to herself. Of course she could. "Nothing can stop me now," she whispered, getting closer to the Studio B door.

Well, she was wrong. She collided with a body, the tree falling from her grasp as she fell backwards onto the ground. Her hands barely catching her fall. Ashley heard the other body grunt and fall away from her and the tree. "Watch where you're going, stupid gofer," the voice barked out.

Ashley couldn't help but chuckle. She just shook her head, pushing herself up off of the ground. "Yeah, whatever," she muttered, picking up the tree and brushing past the blonde on the ground.

She'd seen her fair share of actors and actresses that she wasn't star struck anymore. They were all the same, picky, bitchy, and self-centered. And Spencer Carlin was no different. A huff left her lips as soon as she entered Studio B.

**-------------**

"There is no way that I'm doing that!" Ashley screamed. Her eyes narrowed at the producer in front of her.

He just chuckled at her. "Oh yes you are."

Ashley scowled. "But why? She doesn't even need me. And I'm not even that important. I just carry the trees from one set to the other."

"Which is why we want you to be her…assistant, per se," he shot back. "Just follow her around and make sure that she's happy. It's not like you'd be doing anything better over here."

"What about the boom? Who is gonna do that?" Ashley raised her eyebrow at him. Maybe just maybe she might win this.

But the producer just wasn't going to have it. "We have Ben to do that for us."

Ashley let out a sigh; her shoulders slumped forward in the process. "Fine," she huffed out. "But I'm not gonna be happy about it."

"That's what I like to hear." The man smiled at her. That cheeky grin that just oozed the saying, 'yeah, I win and you lose, get over it.'

Ashley rolled her eyes and turned on her heel. She walked over to the destined trailer. Not happy about it at all.

**-------------**

"What are you doing here?" Spencer hissed, her hand grasping the inside of her trailer door as she stared at the smaller brunette woman.

Ashley sighed. "I have to follow you around and answer to your every whim," she answered, her voice monotone.

Spencer's eyes widened and sparkled in the sunlight. "Well fine. Get in here." She ushered the woman into her trailer and closed the door behind herself, locking it in the process.

**-------------**

"Oh God. Ashley that feels so good," Spencer moaned. "Don't stop." Her eyes rolled into the back of her head as Ashley's hands roamed her bare skin.

Ashley shook her head and rolled her eyes. She reached over and grabbed the lotion bottle. She squirted some into her hands before rubbing them against the blonde's back. "I won't, don't worry."

Her fingers pressed into the rough spots of the blonde's back, kneading out the kinks and knots. With each knot gone, Spencer's body loosened and relaxed under the brunette's fingers. Ashley continued to shake her head. All actors were the same. And this time was no different.

When she felt Spencer's breathing level out, Ashley wiped her hands free of the lotion with a spare towel from the blonde's bathroom. "Actors," she muttered. She scoured the room for a piece of paper and pen.

In one of the drawers by the table, she finally found it. She quickly scribbled out the note, "Yeah, you fell asleep. I'm going home. See you tomorrow I guess. Ashley."

With that, she exited the trailer and stepped into the now cool air of the setting sun. She tugged her jacket closer to her body as she made her way to her car. That rusty beat up car that was just barely standing on its last leg. It wouldn't last much longer. But hopefully with this new…job, she could make enough to get a new one. Well, better one at least.

* * *

**And now, and added treat. Let us check in on Mrs. and Mrs. Smith…**

Enter office. Two women seated in comfortable black canvas chairs. The one on the left: brunette hair pulled back into slick ponytail, wire-rimmed glasses framed her brown eyes. She wore simple black slacks, and a white button up shirt, a sweater vest completed the look, fitting her curves tightly and accentuating her figure. The one on the right: the blonde, sat stiffly as well, her blue eyes blazing. A light smile Mona Lisa like smile softened her somewhat guarded expression. Her hair was down, but stick straight, framing her face eloquently. She wore a black skirt, and black blouse, the very top button loosened made her all too professional attire that little bit casual. There was no denying that the majority of the time (99.9%), she was all business.

"So, Spencer, Ashley. How can I help you?"

The two women shared a look with one another, silently asking who would speak first. In the end they both spoke at the same time.

"We have a problem." "There's an issue."

After laughing awkwardly at themselves, Ashley turned the reins over. "Go ahead."

"No you go," Spencer ceded, not wanting to step on Ashley's toes.

"You sure?"

"Go Ashley," Spencer said, nodding her head slightly to urge her onward.

"Well you see Doctor," Ashley said, diving head-first into the conversation. "We have a situation."

"A situation?"

"Yes, and we're not exactly sure how to go about it," Ashley hedged, being decidedly vague.

"Well, I'm going to need a little more to go on before I can offer my advice Ashley," the therapist said with a chuckle.

"Oh, for God's sake," Spencer huffed impatiently. "We're supposed to kill each other."

The therapist, as expected, was stunned into silence.

"Yeah," Ashley added, a bit uncertainly.

"E-e-ex-cuse me?"

"I'm supposed to kill her and she's supposed to kill me," Ashley clarified further… and as if it was the most natural thing in the world to say.

And for her, it probably was, but for everyone else in the world who wasn't an assassin, it probably would be more than a little shocking.

And since the therapist was part of that everyone else faction, he was understandably shocked, but he managed to maintain some level of clarity. After all, if he hadn't wigged out when that man he saw the other day told him that E.T. was his mother and that he was married to a murderous badger, then there was no reason to now.

"I see, so I'm guessing that you two don't want to kill each other," he said, the words falling out of his mouth with ease even while his mind struggled with them.

"Correct," Spencer relied.

"Yeah, she's kind of grown on me," Ashley agreed, taking a moment to smile at her blonde adversary turned counterpart.

"But, the agencies we're working for want us dead," Spencer added, laying all the cards on the table. "We're world-class assassins."

"I see," the therapist nodded, not sure if they were crazy or just yanking his chain. He chuckled a bit. "So, I'm guessing you could kill me three times before I even hit the floor?" he asked, jokingly.

Spencer smirked. "Four."

"Five if I help," Ashley amended, face stony and serious.

"O…kay then," the therapist said haltingly, swallowing thickly.


	34. Some People Just Need Counseling

"Ashley!" A gruff voice called out from the living room. Yeah, lazy voice too, feet on the coffee table with a beer in one hand and potato chips in the other. And he wonders why he's fat…

"What, Eric?" Ashley asked. The song, _Unemployed Boyfriend_ popped into her head as she saw her…uh…what could we call him? A moocher? Yeah, let's go with that.

A burp emanated from Eric's mouth. "You got dinner done, yet?" He asked, scratching his belly. The…manly thing to do, obviously.

"Eric, you should really get a job." Ashley groaned, turning on her heel to make her way back to the kitchen.

Heavy footsteps followed her.

Great.

"_Ashley_, do you know how hard it is to get one of those?" Eric asked, emphasizing Ashley's name.

"No, _Eric_." Ashley turned around and mocked his tone with a quick head tilt. "It's not hard. Seriously. So come tomorrow, you're either getting a job, or you're out of here."

Eric's eyes sprung open. "You couldn't do that."

"Watch me." Ashley deadpanned.

----------

"I can't believe you're actually dragging me to one of these things." Ashley groaned as the couple stepped into the building.

"It'll be good for us." Eric whispered in reply, wrapping an arm around Ashley's shoulders.

And his arm fell off just as quickly with a shrug of her shoulders. Her glasses were sliding off of her nose, so she pushed them back up.

Obviously.

"No, it won't be good for-"And she was cut off. By the most gorgeous woman in the world.

"Ah, you must be the…" The woman looked down at her clipboard. How professional looking. "Dayton couple. I'm Dr. Carlin. Call me Spencer, though."

Ashley nodded her head before looking down at her feet.

To hide her cheeks, obviously, because they're red.

Duh.

Catch up with the program.

Eric stuck his hand out to shake the Blonde Woman's hand. And Ashley, she just stared at it like it was some sort of disease.

Silly girl.

"Alright." The woman cleared her throat. "Follow me."

----------

"Ok. So we're going to try something different." Spencer breathed out heavily. "Since obviously talking about what's wrong isn't going to work with you two."

Ashley rolled her eyes. Not like it was _her_ fault that Eric was such a douche bag.

"Whatever. Let's get this done and over with." She hissed through clenched teeth, staring up at her…boyfriend.

"Alright. Now we're going to switch roles." The blonde stated, leaning back in her expensive looking chair. "Ashley, I want you to act like Eric. And Eric, I want you to act like Ashley."

The couple gave each other a hesitant glance before nodding their heads.

"Go."

This'll be fun.

"Oh look at me. I'm Eric. I sit on my lazy ass all day and watch fucking Oprah and Days of Our Lives to pass the time until Ashley gets home to make me fucking dinner." Ashley's tone mocked Eric, of course.

Spencer couldn't help but chuckle.

And it's on.

"I'm Ashley; I think I'm the most perfect thing on the planet. I can't do anything for my boyfriend because I was singing all day. Pity me!" Eric's high voice made both girls laugh.

Ashley's quickly died out. "Oh Ashley, please bring me a beer, I can't get off my ass to get it myself."

"Eric, please draw my bath."

"You don't have a fucking clue how hard my job is, Eric!" Ashley screamed, standing up off of the couch, staring down at her male counterpart.

"And you think I'll fucking pity you?! You have another thing coming, Ashley Fucking Davies." Eric yelled in her face, standing up next to her.

Ashley's hand came up and slapped him across the cheek.

"Bitch!" Eric poised his hand to slap her back before Spencer grabbed his wrist.

"Stop it now!" She screamed.

The couple turned and stared at the…doctor.

"Eric, Ashley." Spencer cleared her throat. "It is obvious that you will never come to a reasonable center for this relationship."

"No shit Sherlock." Ashley grumbled under her breath. She sat back down on the couch and leaned against the opposite arm as her…boyfriend.

"It'd be best if you parted ways now."

"Then where will I go?" Eric exclaimed.

"Call that bitch, Lauren you've been fucking for the past three months." Ashley replied coldly.

Eric's eyes went wide. Just before he stormed out of the room.

And cue emotional break-down in three…

Two…

One…

"I can't believe it," Ashley whispered. She leaned forward and pressed her hands against her eyes to stop the pending tears from escaping their rightful place.

And Spencer, being the responsible and caring doctor she is sat next to Ashley, resting her arm on Ashley's back, tracing soft circles on it.

Ashley turned her head and smiled at the blonde. "Thanks," she whispered.

"I can make you forget him," Spencer replied, her voice practically dropping an octave.

Uh…surprise?

Ashley's eyes bugged out of her head.

Well, until Spencer pressed her lips against Ashley's, causing them to close.

Spencer raked her fingers through Ashley's brown locks, causing said woman to moan into the kiss.

Okay, so not expected. But hey, Ashley sure as hell wasn't gonna complain.

She felt herself being laid back onto the couch, soft fingers caressing the skin of her stomach that was showing.

"Oh Go." Ashley panted, pulling away from the kiss, regaining her breath.

Spencer trailed her kisses down Ashley's neck, circling her tongue around the smaller woman's pulse point.

"Oh shit."

Spencer chuckled at Ashley's word choice. Her fingers finding their way down the woman's thigh to the hem of her denim skirt.

A hiss escaped Ashley's lips as Spencer slid her fingers up her left thigh toward her center. "Fuck me."

"Oh, I will."

And Spencer did as she promised. She slipped a digit inside of Ashley's throbbing core. She trailed her mouth down to the top of Ashley's low-cut shirt and back up to her ear lobe, breathing hotly into the shell of her ear. "Tell me what you want, Ashley."

She ceased her fingers, causing the brunette to whimper. "Fuck me, Spencer." Ashley panted. "Make me come."

"Now that, I can do." Spencer replied, picking up her movements and adding another finger into Ashley.

Ashley's hips rose off of the couch as they tried to match Spencer's movements. Spencer merely held them down, letting her orgasm build with each thrust of her fingers.

"God Spencer," Ashley hissed, her nails sinking into Spencer's shoulders.

"Yes, Ashley?" Spencer asked, slowing her fingers down just a bit.

Ashley whimpered, "Please." She rocked her hips toward Spencer's fingers, encouraging her to finish.

"Oh, you wanna come, huh?" Spencer teased, her thumb brushing softly against Ashley, causing the brunette to jolt into Spencer's body.

Ragged breaths came from Ashley's mouth as she nodded. "S-so close." She stated softly, hoping it would help her reach the peak faster.

"I can tell, baby," Spencer whispered against Ashley's neck. She curled her fingers just right as she began to suck on Ashley's pulse point, bringing her closer to the brink.

"Oh my fucking…Spencer!" Ashley screamed, arching her back off of the couch as her orgasm hit her hard., wave after wave of pleasure crashing down over her body.

Spencer slowed her fingers, letting Ashley ride her pleasure out for as long as she could. Ashley fell back onto the couch, breathless. Spencer removed her fingers and brought them up to her lips, licking them clean and tasting the essence that is Ashley.

"Oh God. You taste so fucking good," Spencer stated, smiling down at the shaking body beneath her.

"Let me taste," Ashley demanded, her fingers finding the back of Spencer's neck, pulling her down into a rough kiss.

Spencer pulled back first; shocked at the sudden regain of composure Ashley was showing. She let their breathing level out. She smiled at the brunette.

"What?"

"Your glasses are all foggy."

"Fuck that," Ashley replied, flinging her glasses from her face before bringing Spencer down into another kiss.

----------

"Should I still continue these sessions even though Eric and I aren't together anymore?" Ashley asked, slipping her hands into her brown locks to try and normalize her look.

Spencer shrugged, taking a seat in her chair. "If you want to." She raised a pencil and started scribbling on a calendar resting on her desk. "How does next Tuesday at three sound?"

"Perfect," Ashley muttered. She caught Spencer's gaze before turning to exit the room. "See you around, Dr. Carlin." She shot the blonde a wink before leaving the room.

Well, until next Tuesday at three that is.


	35. Stop, In The Name of Love

"So, I told that bastard, I told him…I deserve to be on this case. I've been busting my ass for years at this firm and it's time I finally got blah, blah, blah…." And so on and so forth.

Spencer sighed yet again.

This was starting to borderline on ridiculous. I mean, countless pursuit after countless pursuit, nights of wining and dining, and yet, after every night of alcohol-infused and caloric-burning night of passion, she still found herself bored the minute daylight broke.

Yes, ridiculous it was that even Josh Duhammel was starting to bore her.

Then again, he is only a soap opera actor. Now, when Ryan Gosling wore out his welcome – _that_ was surprising.

"…get together again sometime?"

That question finally broke through her reverie and Spencer blinked a couple of times before going through the motions.

Or she could have a little fun with this one…

Oh, come on. It's been a while.

"Actually, Josh," she said, placing her hand over one of his. "I don't think that's such a good idea. It's not that I don't like you or anything and last night will forever be ingrained in my memory. It's just…" she trails off, knowing soon he'll-

"It's just what Spencer?"

Right on time.

"I have an ex-boyfriend and he's the very jealous type. I just don't know if you'd want that on your plate. I mean, he's still kind of convinced we'll work out but, no. We're so over,"

"Oh yeah. Well, I mean, that's cool. I'm not exactly a sack of skin and bones if you haven't noticed. I can hold my own," he said, smiling adorably. Or, you know, some people would call it that. "Who is the guy anyway?"

This is where it gets fun. "You ever watch WWE?"

Josh's eyes get big as he stutters out a "yes."

"Well, you know the guy formerly known as the Giant, then The Big Show, and is now just The Show?"

"_That's _your ex-boyfriend?"

"'Fraid so big guy. And he can be kind of intimidating,"

Josh was kind of hyperventilating now. "No shit. He's like seven feet tall and 300 plus pounds."

"Yeah…so, still want to hang out and stuff?"

She'd never seen someone's head spin but his was bordering that sentiment exactly.

"Let's….uh, how about I call you?" he asked, eyes darting around cautiously now. He really didn't need to be captured on TMZ getting his ass beat by some roid'-ragin' wrestler.

Spencer nodded once, giving him freedom to take his hurried leave, leaving her with the bill.

Small price to pay.

Anyway, now she was free. Free to live, free to be, free to…

Speed!

Another one of her flaws: her lead foot.

She was cruising down the boulevard at a comfortable, yet illegal, speed when–

BLIP BLUP!

Sirens.

Damn it!

It was time for Spencer to don yet another mask – the sexy speed vixen.

Pulling over to the side of the road, Spencer made quick work of tugging down her already low cut tank top, then threw her head forward and back effecting the sex-tussled look. Lastly, she batted her eyelashes into her rearview mirror one time and darted her tongue out to wet her lips.

Mission complete: she now looked hot…ter.

She watched as the traffic cop climbed out of his vehicle, adjusting his uh, package before walking forward slowly, hands tucked into his holster. He wore a hat, of course, and dark aviator sunglasses. Totally fuckable in her opinion and if all went well, she just might.

She disregarded that he would probably be five feet tall with boots on.

She rolled down her window as soon as he approached, armed with her doe eyes and innocent smile. "Is there a problem officer?"

The cop smiled briefly, amused, before taking off his hat.

Or hers.

Yeah, color her shocked.

Spencer's jaw dropped immediately and the officer couldn't help but chuckle a bit before getting down to business. "Ma'am, were you aware that you were doing 65 in a 45 miles per hour zone?"

Spencer shook her head, jaw still dislodged.

"You were not?"

"Huh?" This question confused Spencer.

"You weren't aware?"

"Aware of what?"

Now the officer pulled down her shades, eyeing the other woman with a different kind of scrutiny. "Are you on something?"

Finally, Spencer came to life. "Excuse me? I can not believe you would even ask me that?" Spencer said, unbelievably offended. I mean, how presumptuous.

"I'm sorry ma'am. I just thought-"

Spencer scoffed. "No, you weren't. You obviously were not thinking if you asked me that question."

"I'm sorry. That was wrong," the officer admitted, clearly backtracking. "I'm sorry."

"I accept your apology," Spencer finally said, albeit haltingly.

Then the both of them realized what was going on.

"Right, well, anyway, you were driving twenty miles over the speed limit and I need your license and registration,"

"Fine," Spencer grumbled, reaching over into her glove box, unaware of the ample cleavage she was showing as a result of the action. Unaware, that is, until she leaned back and caught the officer ogling her goodies, and then flushing deeply once she'd realized she'd been caught.

And, surprisingly, Spencer blushed too.

"Here you are Officer…" she trailed off, eyeing the officer's badge. "Davies."

"Uh, thank you," the other woman croaked out, literally snatching the materials away from Spencer. The blonde waited patiently for her ticket, taking the time to oh so subtly check out the officer.

What?

She could _look_.

Okay, so Spencer wasn't gay. Hey, just because you're on a diet, doesn't mean you can't check out the menu.

Plus, she'd caught a few women looking her way and had entertained the thought of maybe possibly "entertaining" them. It was fleeting and probably just left-over tension from failed experiments in college, but still…maybe.

She was just glancing at the muscles twitching in the officer's forearm while she wrote, imagining what other actions might make those muscles jump like that when a throat cleared.

Her blue eyes met mirrored sunglass ones.

And a smirk.

Caught.

"Here's your ticket," Officer Davies said before ripping the pink sheet off of her pad, handing it, along with Spencer's materials, back to the blonde. Their fingers accidentally brushed one another and Spencer couldn't fight the shiver that raced up her spine.

"So, you make sure you take care of that ticket Miss Carlin," Officer Davies says, stepping away from the car slightly, fitting her cap back onto her head. "And, have a nice day." With one more dazzling smile, she was off, back into her squad car before Spencer could even blink, letting the siren go quickly twice before taking off.

Spencer sat back in her seat, dumbfounded but not really knowing why. It wasn't as if any illicit words were exchanged, but the way that cop looked at her…GOD!

Anyway, now her day was kind of blown.

Speeding tickets suck.

But when she finally looked at the thing, she realized it wasn't a ticket at all. It was an invitation to dinner and…driving classes?

Oh she can not be serious.

Luckily, Officer Davies, or Ashley as the note says, left a phone number for Spencer to call, no doubt predicting the blonde's confusion.

She answered on the second ring.

_I hope you're not talking on your cell while driving_

Spencer started a bit before she started speaking. "…No."

_You so are_

"Fine. I am. But what is this? I mean, I don't see a dollar figure on this piece of paper,"

_Hey, my traffic classes are priceless_

"Traffic class?"

"Yes. Now get to that address. Pronto,"

"Do I have to do this? _Now_?" Spencer really didn't want to sit in on some stuffy traffic class. It didn't matter how hot the instructor was.

Oh God, no she didn't just think that.

_No. _Spencer sighed. _Unless of course you want to go to jail. According to the law, this is your punishment in exchange for paying the fine. A tactic I can use at my discretion._

"Great," Spencer sarcastically mumbled, already changing directions to get to the address.

_Don't make me come and get you. I trust I'll be seeing you soon. Oh and blondie?_

"Huh?"

_Not too soon. _

Click.

That probably shouldn't have sounded as hot as it did.

---

"Spencer Carlin," Officer Davies says, stepping forward as soon as the blonde hesitantly opens the door to the classroom.

Empty classroom. Save for her.

"Is this the location of your world-renowned traffic class?"

"I don't know," Officer Davies shrugged, leaning against one of the desks situated around the room. "You tell me."

Spencer got caught up in some kind of staring game but quickly shook loose, opting to just sit down at one of the desks instead. "Are we gonna hurry this thing up? I do have to meet up with my boyfriend."

For a second, the officer's face fell, but she rebounded quickly, the smirk reappearing on her face. "You're still speeding through life, I see. We'll teach you your lesson yet."

How Spencer ended up stretched out on the classroom floor, atop of what could barely be considered a sheet, the world may never know.

What she did know was that Officer Davies had made good use of her handcuffs and was now teaching Spencer the very virtues of "taking it slow".

She bucked again as Ashley's hands trailed once more over her taught abdomen. She couldn't remember exactly when the traffic cop had taken off her uniform shirt and hat, but she was finding it increasingly difficult to lie still while feasting her eyes on such beauty.

"Ash…" she whispered out, throat tightening and closing in on her as the sensations overloaded her senses and the officer merely chuckled, trailing just the tip of her fingers between Spencer's breasts, down between her ribs, and settling at her navel, then up again, slowly. "Ashley."

"What Spencer?"

"What-" she had to stop here to bite back a moan as Ashley's fingers danced along the edge of her underwear. "What are you doing to me?" she eventually whispered out, feeling ridiculously off-kilter for someone who hadn't even been kissed yet.

Ashley leaned down suddenly, bringing her tank top covered torso in direct contact with Spencer's and for the first time Spencer registered that the other woman was breathing heavily. Her eyes widened then closed when she suddenly felt those heated breaths on her ear. "Do you want me to stop?" the officer whispered, darting her tongue out near the end to flick just below her earlobe.

"No," Spencer managed weakly. "Just…wondering what you were doing. Carry on."

Ashley chuckled again, opting to stay where she was and press a kiss against Spencer's ear. Her lips moved just a fraction of an inch to kiss her cheek. Then Spencer turned her face around and watched as Ashley pressed a wet kiss right at the corner of her mouth. She pulled back with a smile then brought her face towards Spencer again, this time their mouths meeting full on, chaste at first but that only lasted for the briefest of moments before Ashley's tongue traced Spencer's lower lip and Spencer welcomed her with no hesitation.

Now, they were kissing. Spencer was kissing another woman. Making out even.

And she had no complaints.

In fact, she was so caught up in the slow languid wet kiss that she hadn't realized Officer Davies' right hand trailing lower, lightly scratching her stomach as it ghosted over the skin there. She hadn't noticed the hand trailing up her thigh slowly, ever so gently approaching the place where her body was throbbing. She hadn't noticed a thing until she felt two fingers slip inside her panties, rubbing against her so achingly slow she thought she would cry.

She did actually, cry out that is, as well as buck forward like a maniac as her body jack-knifed. She'd never been so turned on in her life.

Ashley rubbed against her experimentally, making her crazy. All Spencer could do was turn her head from side to side, her hips not under her own control as Ashley's weight atop her held her down.

No, there was no speeding up this process, because, like Officer Davies said, "slow and steady wins the race." She felt Ashley's lips on her neck, sucking the skin there into the warm cavern of her mouth, nipping gently. And if she didn't know any better she would swear she was going to pass out or have a heart attack.

The fingers in her panties ghosted lower for a second and she gasped as her body arced up like a bow. "Ash…"

"Tell me," was all the officer said, and, by some miracle, Spencer knew exactly what she meant.

"I want you."

"'Bout time," Officer Davies said before entering Spencer as gently as possible, the sensation sensual enough to force Spencer's eyes shut, her face awash in concentration. "I'm not hurting you am I?" Ashley asked, her mouth close to the other woman's ear. "I can stop if you want me to."

"No," Spencer breathed out after a few false starts. "I'm fine."

"Not for long," the officer whispered cryptically, Spencer barely registering the woman move lower, so much lower that-

"OH SHIT!"

"Told you."

---

Spencer kinda sat in a daze. Her eyes glazed over as she no doubt replayed her encounter with the Officer again and again.

She'd made it into work after all, after their romp.

Their escapade.

There was no promise of more, in spite of how badly Spencer may have wanted it, she wasn't gonna ask Officer Sex Cop if she could put her on speed dial under "Booty Call". She didn't think the Officer would take too kindly to that.

Also, what the hell was that?

Was it some kind of sick game?

Lesbo cop tracks down hot speeding blondes and fucks them into submission. Because if so, Spencer did not want to be part of that bunch.

Hell. No.

Spencer was unique.

All the way down to her name.

"Spencer,"

That's right. Say my name bitch.

"_Spencer_,"

Ilene.

"Hey, what's up Ilene?" she said, finally freeing the cobwebs.

"God, girl, where were you?" Ilene said, sitting her cup of coffee down on Spencer's desk. "I've been paging you forever and calling you for even longer."

"Just kinda spacey this morning I guess,"

"Yeah, I guess. So what did you do this morning?" Ilene asked, fixing Spencer with a smirk that screamed of illicitness.

In her mind, that is.

"What do you mean?" she asked, her voice a few – thousand – octaves higher than usual.

Ilene looked visibly unnerved. "Girl, calm down. I just was wondering whether you were speeding or something. There's some traffic cop here to see you and he looks hot."

Spencer rolled her eyes. "He's a she Ilene and she's in major shit."

"Okay…want me to send her in here, then? Or no?"

"Nah, you can send her in," Spencer said, eyes on her office door. "Send her right on in."

Within moments Ilene was gone and Spencer heard a lazy knock on her door a few moments after that.

She crossed her office to open the door, meeting mirrored eyes and a smirk.

She slammed the door back in place.

"Spencer?"

"Go away."

Officer Davies opened and closed said door as she stepped inside.

"You're breaking and entering," Spencer stated dryly, seated at her desk and burying her nose in paperwork.

"The door was unlocked genius,"

"Then you're trespassing,"

"Public property,"

"Stalking?" Spencer offered, raising an eyebrow at the other woman.

"Maybe that one,"

"Whatever. Be gone,"

"Why are you being like this?"

"Look, Officer Davies," Spencer practically growled, springing from her chair like a tightly wound coil. "I'm not gonna be another trophy on your shelf. Some little speed vixen notch on your headboard. I don't get down like that," she finished, looking absolutely furious.

And then, even more so, when Officer Davies just burst out laughing.

"Oh my- Get OUT!" Spencer said, moving from behind her desk to make sure that Officer Davies would vacate the premises, even if it meant a little physical coaxing.

She shoved her.

Ashley stopped laughing, sort of.

"Is that the best you've got?"

Spencer pushed her again, this time throwing more of her weight into it.

Ashley took a half-step back. "C'mon Princess. You can do better than that."

Enraged, Spencer threw her full body weight into the shove this time and was met with little resistance. Very little. Like, no resistance.

Ashley side-stepped the blow and caught the blonde just before she hit the floor, turning her to hold her in a very classic dance pose – the dip. "Ready to listen to me now," the brunette asked, mirrored eyes trained on wide blue ones.

Spencer just nodded.

"Well, it started out pretty routine for me. Stopping you that is. You were speeding, I was on duty. Simple as that. And I wasn't gonna do anything out of the ordinary until you not so casually turned the conversation around on me, putting me on the defensive. There are not many women alive that can do that and when I saw you checking me out," she paused here to look at Spencer, who merely blushed in response. "I knew I couldn't just turn you loose. Not without talking to you."

"So, that's why you made me go to that place? To talk?" Spencer asked skeptically, once Ashley finally righted them both, so that they stood in front of each other.

"Don't get me wrong sweetheart," Ashley started, her voice playful. "I don't regret what happened between us one instant. But," she admitted, her voice growing softer. "I had no intention of things getting out of hand, like they did. I only wanted to talk to you," she said, raising a tentative hand to brush some runaway hair out of Spencer's face, withdrawing immediately when Spencer gasped and then took a tiny step back.

"Why are you here now?" she asked, her face halfway between scared and longing. It was a very intriguing combination. Probably why Ashley couldn't look away.

Ashley's lips quirked up in a smile – effectively prompting the same by reflex in Spencer. "I owe you dinner; or do you read as badly as you drive?"

Spencer couldn't help but laugh at that. "I read as badly as you look."

"Touché."

"Let me grab my bag and then I'll be all set to go," Spencer said, moving over to her desk to grab her purse, keys, lipstick, and cell phone. She turned back around only to find herself in close (read: very close) proximity with the Officer.

"What are you do-"

…

Ashley pulled away painfully slow, smiling when Spencer (adorably so) struggled to open her eyes. When she finally did, Ashley had put a little distance between them. "One for the road," she said with a wink, before opening the office door, adorning her cap once again. "Shall we?"

"We shall," Spencer grinned at the open elbow and corny look on Ashley's face before sliding her fingers along the officer's side slowly, reaching her destination and smirking at both the look on Ashley's face and her small victory. "I'm driving, though," she announced, snatching her arm back, Ashley's car keys dangling from her fingers.


	36. Special Delivery

She was really running late. Like _really_ late.

And she blamed it entirely on the person she was talking on the phone to.

"So then I was like, 'there's no way we can do that is the backseat Derek'. And he was like, 'yeah huh', and then I was like 'nuh uh'," and the conversation kinda droned on like that for a while. Her friend Madison, who she was quickly outgrowing now that they'd graduated college, could really carry on about some ridiculous things.

"Wow, uh, that's great Madison. I gotta run or I'm gonna be late for this interview, so I'll talk to you later. Okay. Alright. Buh, bye," she said, breathing out a heavy breath as she closed the phone. She was just stuffing it back into her purse when she heard the elevator ding some thirty feet away, across the crowded foyer.

The elevator she needed to be on if she intended to make this interview on time.

This life-changing once in a lifetime interview.

No pressure, right?

She took off through the waves of bodies, eyes staying on the open yet still empty elevator. She saw a shock of blonde hair rush inside and shortly after the doors started to close.

NOOOO!

Ashley put her head down and ran faster, instantly regretting the fact that she was a heavy smoker. That, coupled with the running, made it impossible for her to call out.

Just as she reached the doors, they slammed shut, her eyes catching the startled blue ones just as they closed.

Stomping in exasperation she glanced at the other elevators, noting with a scowl that they all were about and average of thirty floors up, and climbing. Before she could get too deflated though, the one behind her dinged, and the blonde-haired, blue-eyed creature spoke to her.

"Are you going up?" the woman asked softly, her finger pressed against the 'door open' button on the elevator panel.

Ashley, more than relieved, nodded as she stepped inside the room elevator, giving the other woman a smile as she pressed the button for the floor she needed: 65th. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," the woman replied, pressing the closed doors button now before relaxing against the side of the elevator. She looked wiped.

And as Ashley looked her over, because who wouldn't, she noted that the woman looked a lot of other things as well. She was beautiful, but that went without saying. And she was obviously friendly. And she was very, _very_, pregnant.

"When are you due?" Ashley asked, offering her a polite smile.

"This month," the woman replied, smiling back. "A few more weeks," she added, patting her stomach lightly. Almost as if she were afraid she'd explode.

Ashley smiled. "Do you know what you're having?"

The woman shook her head, her blonde hair flowing almost like a waterfall with the movement. "I wanted to be surprised," she answered shyly. She moved in a little closer though, her blue eyes sparkling. "I'm secretly hoping for a girl though."

Ashley grinned fully because that was beyond cute. "I hope she's as beautiful as you," she said, her eyes widening a bit because…well, WOW.

"Oh please," the blonde woman muttered, still smiling but disbelieving. "I haven't seen my feet in years and I can't put on a belt without employing the use of a boomerang."

Ashley laughed politely, her gaze still fixed on the woman though. "That may be true. But you are beautiful. Don't doubt that."

The blonde caught her gaze, a deep red settling into her cheeks. "Thank you," she whispered.

"You're welcome," Ashley replied, never taking her eyes away.

That is, until the elevator lurched viciously, violently shaking until settling and then…stopping.

She glanced down at the woman she was now holding, both sets of eyes wide. "What the hell just happened?" the woman asked her.

"I think the elevator's stopped," Ashley said, noting that the lights were dimmer than they were just moments before.

Before she could react much the speaker system crackled to life, a harsh voice cutting across the silence. "Attention passengers in elevators B and C. We are experiencing some technical difficulties and they should be resolved shortly. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause. Thank you."

"Unbelievable," Ashley whispered, helping the woman stand upright again. "Un-fucking-believable."

"Kinda yeah," the blonde muttered, rubbing her stomach again.

Ashley started moving around in the elevator, starting her little rant. "I mean, all I was trying to do was go on this probably ten-minute interview and first my car wouldn't start,"

"Uh-"

"…then I couldn't track down a cab,"

"Excus-"

"…and then Madison calls me and goes all plastic girl dumb on m- WHOA!"

THUD!

Ashley sat up from the floor, rubbing her elbow. "What in the- ew! What is this?" she asked, pulling back her injured hand as it came into contact with some watery substance that definitely wasn't there before.

She then noticed the blonde, clutching her stomach, eyes bigger than pie plates.

"I think my water just broke,"

OH MY GOD!

"Ohmigod, ohmigod, ohmigod," Ashley chanted, breathing out so rapidly you'd think she was the one who'd spent the last four weeks in LaMas class.

"Please, please don't freak out on me?" the blonde woman pleaded, her eyes watery.

She looked so vulnerable and so afraid that Ashley found something within herself and held it together, for both of them really. "I'm not. I won't okay," she assured the woman, getting up to help her sit down. "Now let's get you into a more comfortable position, okay?" she told her, taking off her suit jacket and bunching it up to use as a makeshift pillow.

The woman nodded and allowed herself to be lowered to the elevator floor, lying back on the jacket.

"There you go," Ashley said softly, watching as she settled into as comfortable a position as she could. "Now, if there a name I should be calling you gorgeous?" she asked, winking, hoping the levity might ease some of the tension of the situation.

"Spencer," the blonde said, smiling with a blush.

"Well, Spencer. I'm Ashley and I'm gonna see what we can do about this," she said brightly, fishing her cell out of her purse before frowning.

"What is it?" Spencer asked.

"There's no signal strength. Stupid elevator,"

"What about the call button?"

"Good idea," Ashley said, scampering to her feet and pressing said button.

No response.

Idiots.

She pressed it again.

"We're working on it," the voice barked from the speaker.

"Uh…that's great," Ashley said. "But, there's a pregnant lady on here and her water just broke."

"Oh shit," the voice on the other end said. They could hear some papers being shuffled around. "Uh…just sit tight, and we'll try to get some emergency personnel here. Do you think you can do that?"

"Well we ain't exactly goin' anywhere pal,"

"I didn't mean…Is the lady… her attractions… how far apart are they?"

"Her whats?" Ashley asked, her face scrunched up in confusion. She turned back to Spencer and saw that the woman's face was red with exertion.

"Oh my God, Spencer, what's wrong?"

It took Spencer a few times, but she finally managed to stutter out contraction.

"You're having a contraction?" she asked her and Spencer merely nodded.

Ashley reached a hand out to stroke some hair out of Spencer's face. "And is this the first one?" Ashley asked her and Spencer shook her head as she blew out a breath.

"I had the first one when you first hit the call button,"

Ashley frowned. "But that was like a minute ago,"

Spencer smiled tightly, "I know."

"Oh Gods," Ashley muttered, scrambling back to her feet. "Dude, dude guy?!" she squeaked out.

"Yeah,"

"They're like a minute apart,"

Silence.

"Dude?!"

Silence.

"DUUUDE?!" her and Spencer enquired loudly.

"I'm sorry. I was calling emergency personnel in here. Here you go,"

"Hi. My name's Brian and I'm gonna help walk you through this," a nicer voice sounded through the speaker.

"Help walk me through what?" Ashley squeaked.

"Well, Ma'am you're gonna have to deliver this baby…Ma'am? …Ma'am?"

**-----------**

"Ashley?" Spencer enquired groggily, she kept almost passing out after each "push".

"I'm here Spence," Ashley breathed out, stroking the inside of an ankle to accentuate her point.

After getting over the initial shock, she'd warmed up to the idea of childbirth. And after seeing all of what goes on down there, she'd decided that it wasn't for her to be on the delivering end of this process.

"I'm gonna die," Spencer rasped out. Her voice was near gone from crying out, but she'd tired of that ages ago. She needed the extra energy anyway.

"No you're not. I'm not gonna let you. Now, it's almost here. We just have to get the rest of the head out of the way,"

"You're doing great Spencer," Brian echoed, encouraging from floors away. "And Ashley's right. You're almost done. One more big push and you'll have your little one."

"Come on," Ashley prodded gently. "You ready Spencer?"

"I can't," Spencer cried, shaking her head. "I can't."

"Yes you can," Ashley cooed, reaching a hand up to grab one of Spencer's. "You can baby," she continued. "I'm gonna help you, okay? I've got you. I've got you and your baby. Now, come on, Spence. You ready?"

Spencer nodded, sitting up as she readied her mind and her body for the pain.

**-----------**

She squeezed Ashley's hand as tightly as she could on that final push, and after a moment that was all she could feel, her body going numb with pain. Then she heard the absolute sweetest sound ever.

"Waaaah! Waaaa, Waaa, Waaaaah!"

With what little strength Spencer had left, she lifted her head up to peak down at Ashley who was working on something she couldn't see, listening to instructions from the speaker. Finally, after a long while, Ashley crawled over to her, ever mindful of her precious cargo.

"Hey Spencer," she said softly, lying the bundle on her chest. "Here is your beautiful baby girl."

Spencer's eyes burst forth with a new batch of tears, happy tears.

"Ha, I was right," Ashley said. "She is as beautiful as you."

**-----------**

Ashley hummed merrily as she made her way back from the hospital room gift shop. After she'd found out where they were bringing Spencer, and a quick wash up, she'd made up her mind to go and visit the blonde. She'd given it a few hours, knowing that the other woman probably had family and such that wanted a visit of course. But, when she signed in on the visitor's log, she noted, sadly, that no one had been in to visit the blonde.

Peeking into the room, she saw Spencer holding the little newborn, her eyes concerned with nothing else. It was a tender moment but for some reason, Ashley didn't think she'd be intruding if she interrupted.

Spencer looked up with a wide smile as she walked into the room loaded with balloons and teddy bears.

All pink of course.

"Did you buy out the gift shop?" Spencer asked.

"Guilty as charged. But can you blame me?" she said softly, taking a seat at Spencer's bedside.

Spencer blushed before she shook her head, turning back to her daughter.

"Now, are you gonna tell me her name or am I going to have to pretend I didn't read the patient chart again?"

Spencer chuckled a bit before clearing her throat. "Ashley," she said, turning the baby slightly so that she could see her. "I'd like you to meet, again, Maya Ashley Carlin."

Ashley's eyes lit up as she regarded Spencer. "Ashley?"

"I amended it this morning," Spencer said. "I hope you don't mind."

"Of course I don't mind. I'm…I'm touched Spencer,"

"Well, you did help bring her into this world," Spencer said, kissing the little girl on the head. "And, I think it's a fitting way to show my gratitude."

"Thank you," Ashley whispered, reaching down to place a whisper of a kiss on Spencer's brow. She looked to the baby again, whose bright blue eyes were staring up at her in curiosity. "This one is gonna steal a lot of hearts," she said, brushing a finger against the little one's cheek. "I know it."

"Oh do you?" Spencer mused.

"Mmm hmm,"

"And how do you know?"

Ashley silently regarded Spencer for a long time. "I just do," she whispered.

Spencer just nodded, turning back to look at Maya.

Ashley smiled, joining Spencer companionably in baby-gazing, her thoughts elsewhere.

'I know because her mother already stole mine.'


	37. Lap Dance

**A/N:** **I'm a year older and still up to the same old stuff. Meaning, I still completely forget fics. That being said, I need to dedicate some time to wrapping this one up. Hopefully, I'll be more motivated when these respective sports seasons are over (Poor Bulls). Regardless, I'm going to get starting on a spin-off of sorts from the Trilogy. It's called Kyan's story and it's told mostly in the perspective of the youngest of the Carlin-Davies clan. So, bear with me and this (I really hate my writing these days) slump I'm in. Hopefully, it'll turn around. Thanks for your continued patience and thanks for reading this little mini-creations of mine.**

**MGMK**

--

"Guys, come on. No. I'm not going," Spencer said, trying to turn away yet again.

Cadence groaned, turning the uncomfortable blonde back around. "You're doing this."

"We're doing this," her other friend Jessica corrected, flanking Spencer's other side. "C'mon. You can't seriously back out now. I'm like all eager and stuff now."

Spencer only pouted.

"Put it away," Jessica commanded, poking the lip playfully. "You asked and we're going. Now, let's go celebrate your gayness."

Spencer rolled her eyes but still smiled shyly as they both took her by the arm and drug her inside.

Inside where, you ask?

Why, the strip club, of course.

The place was dimly lit, perfect lighting actually when you consider how Spencer's face had just about erupted with embarrassment the moment she'd stepped foot in the place.

She could barely make out the sea of faces staring, unabashedly, not at her but at the many forms gyrating on a glittery stage for their enjoyment.

Thankfully her friends had taken her to a place that was somewhat upscale…decent. Or so she thought.

That is until the dancer onstage quickly unclasped her bra (or what could be perceived as a bra) and flung it on the floor, staring out at the audience with an innocent "Oops." Getting a "Yeeah baby!" in response.

Of course, that was Cadence, trying to get her into the swing of things.

Yeah, not gonna happen.

"Oh God," Spencer groaned, burying her face in her hands.

"There's a table opening up," Jessica squealed, tugging her onward before she could protest.

"And it's right by the stage, _sweet_," Cadence added, settling in comfortably.

Spencer stared at them. "Are you two sure _you're_ not gay?"

"Sit down and shut up, Spencer," Jessica commanded, pulling the girl into her lap. "The next dancer's about to come on."

"Yeah and pay close attention Spence," Cadence said before playfully whispering to Jessica. "I don't think she's ever seen boobies up close before."

"Shut up," Spencer squealed, crossing her arms with a pout as they snickered. "I see mine all the time."

Jessica and Cadence's laughter was drowned out then by the announcer as his microphone crackled to life.

"…plucked this song bird right from the sunny state of California. Gentlemen, and you beautiful ladies, please welcome Paradise Lounge's latest acquisition, the Lovely Lady from Los Angeles, but we call her… Dark Angel…"

Spencer felt a little eerie, especially when the lights dimmed further and a billowy smoky surface covered the stage. She could just barely make out the silhouettes on the stage, hurrying to put everything in place. Then the spotlight came on and Spencer was rendered thoughtless.

Less than about five feet from her seat sat one unbelievably attractive brunette, wearing a smirk, some cowboy boots, and an acoustic guitar as far as Spencer could tell.

"Hey everyone," the woman spoke and Spencer nearly melted at the sound. "How's everybody tonight?"

"Woo!" some obnoxious guy near Spencer yelled. "Take it off!"

"Cool it Johnnie," the brunette deadpans and Spencer can't help but chuckle along with the rest of the crowd. Well, giggle is more like it…with a snort.

That was probably what got the woman's attention.

Her brown eyes quickly found Spencer's and her smirk transformed into a smile as the blonde's face turned ashen.

"And what's your name?" she asked her and Spencer merely blinked. There was no way she was giving up her name.

"Her name's Spencer," Cadence spoke up, smiling wickedly at the blonde and giving her a subtle nudge. "It's her first time if ya' know what I mean."

"Well hello there Spencer and I consider myself very fortunate to be your first," she said, shooting a wink in the blonde's direction. "You know what? I think I'm gonna dedicate this song to you."

Pretty soon the place was swaying back and forth to the stripper's smoky voice but then she tossed the guitar aside and that's when the clothes started flying.

Cadence and Jessica watched in amusement as Spencer practically drooled over the brunette on the stage.

"Having fun there Spencer?" Jessica asked her, and the blonde finally tore her eyes away. Her face burned bright red when she realized they were looking at her.

"It's not too bad,"

"Hmm…" Cadence said, mock scratching her chin. "Oh Dark Angel," she called, trying to be heard over the din of the crowd.

After a couple of attempts, the brunette on stage finally realized they were trying to get her attention.

"What's going on ladies?" she asked them, teasingly covering her uncovered chest with an arm.

"I think my friend Spencer here would enjoy a lap dance," Cadence said, handing the woman a couple of large bills.

She waved it off though, stepping off of the stage with the assistance of one of the bodyguards.

"How 'bout it sugar? Ready for me to rock your world?"

Spencer's eyes widened as the brunette approached her, grinning quixotically.

"I'll take that as a yes."

--

Spencer couldn't have gotten any redder had they took red face paint and plastered it to her cheeks.

This Dark Angel woman was mere inches from her overheated flesh, gyrating and pulsing in her lap.

Spencer's fingers clenched the side of her seat with desperation as she fought hard not to touch her. Those were the rules here.

No touching.

Well, no touching for Spencer. The stripper woman, it seemed, had free range to touch whatever she wanted.

The woman flung off her bra, holding an arm across her chest in a teasing display of modesty.

"You look like you're about to pass out, sugar. You still with me?" Dark Angel asked, smiling crookedly at the blonde getting all worked up.

Spencer merely nodded, because she'd discovered any time she attempted to speak the words would just get caught in the back of her throat, only allowing her to emit squeaks and that was something she decided wouldn't go over very well with the brunette or her friends who she was sure would never let her live it down.

Hell, she was sure they were never going to let her live _this _down if the looks on their faces were any determination.

In fact, she couldn't be sure, but Cadence may have very well been pissing herself trying to hold back laughter.

Suddenly, Dark Angel's hand grabbed her face, a little more roughly than she'd ever been accustomed to, and turning Spencer's face back in her direction.

The blonde's eyes widened.

"Am I boring you?" the raven-haired beauty asked, her voice stern yet her face anything but.

Spencer shook her head, barely able to whisper out a "No." Dark Angel flipped her head forward, pressing forward into Spencer, her locks cascading around both of their heads, providing a temporary curtain between them and the outside world.

"Put your arms around me," she whispered to the prone Spencer, detecting instantly that the woman had gone stiff. She leaned closer, putting her face right on the side of the blonde's, her mouth right next to her ear. "Just relax," she whispered again, and she finally felt the thighs beneath her own melt, and the arms around her slackened in intensity, loosening so that they were draped loosely across her lower back.

"There you go," she whispered again, smiling and pulling back, her lips inadvertently catching Spencer's ear lobe. "Just imagine it's just you and me." When she was back all the way she caught the blonde grinning stupidly and couldn't hold back a giggle.

"Is your world sufficiently rocked?" she asked, raising a coy brow.

"I think I could go for another round," Spencer said, somehow more confident. Ashley hopped off her lap and turned around, sitting on her lap and falling backwards so that her head was draped over Spencer's right shoulder. Spencer caught a good look of her…um…assets and amended that statement, swallowing thickly. "Or two. Yeah, um, definitely two."

--

"I hope you enjoyed yourself Carlin because that little number just cost you your birthday and Christmas presents for the next two years," Cadence said, pulling out her empty pocketbook.

They were just outside the establishment, waiting for their cab to show up because they all were satisfactorily hammered.

"Oh, I did my friend. I really did," the blonde slurred out. "That Dark Angel was all the way hot. Like not just a little but like a bunch hot."

The other two women just looked at each other mouthing the words "Too much Jaeger."

"Well, it is official though," Jessica stated, draping an arm around Spencer. "After seeing our girl here in action, I think we can finally say with ease that this one here is gayer than Ellen DeGeneres watching the L Word with Elton John on a Tuesday."

"Why Tuesday?" Cadence asked, confused about that bit.

Jessica shrugged. "I'm drunk."

"The cab is here," Spencer unnecessarily called out, seeing as they were the only ones outside the place waiting. "The caaaaab is heeeere!"

"I heard you Spencer. Cork it," Cadence said, opening the back passenger seat and pushing Jessica into it. She slid in next, Spencer following only because she had a firm grip on the blonde's wrist.

But when Spencer finally (after three tries) got her hand wrapped around the door handle to close it, she found that she couldn't.

Jessica cut her eyes at the girl and the cab driver looked back too. "Close the door Spencer."

"I'm trying but…I can't," she grunted out, tugging on the handle again and then jumping backwards when a face suddenly loomed in front of hers.

"Hey Sugar," the Dark Angel said, her smoky voice even more mesmerizing now that the night had grown longer. "Mind if I catch a ride with you?"

Spencer's jaw dropped but she nodded, way too enthusiastically according to anybody else. But she was drunk and couldn't be sure if she was actually nodding so she did it a couple thousand times to make sure her answer had come across.

"Cool," the stripper said, jumping into the vehicle. It made for a tight fit, the four of them in the back. Particularly with Spencer and the brunette, but Jessica and Cadence weren't giving them any space.

Spencer openly stared at the woman, who'd lost the make-up and the cowboy boots, and was practically covered up from head to toe with the New York night chill, but she still looked hot.

Very hot.

And a very drunk Spencer couldn't help but notice this every single minute.

"What's your name?" she suddenly blurted out, leaning so close to the other woman that it was bordering on inappropriate.

"Now, why do you want to know my name sugar?"

"Well, you know mine. It's only…I dunno…fair," Spencer same back with that response fairly quickly for someone who was just a tad bit past inebriated.

"Touché," the brunette woman said, grinning slyly. "I'm Ashley," she finally said, keeping her eyes on the blonde. "And you're Spencer, right?"

"You remembered?" Spencer nearly squealed in delight and Cadence and Jessica choked back chuckles.

Ashley didn't though, she laughed huskily, deep and sexy. "How could I forget? Cute name – cute girl."

"I'm gay," Spencer, again, was random and well, weird.

Ashley looked past the blonde to the other two women who were watching with interest. "Is she trying to hit on me?"

"Maybe," Cadence offered, not entirely sure. "She's like fresh out of the closet so I've never seen her in gay action before."

"Yeah," Jessica added. "but Lord help her if she is."

Spencer, oblivious to the conversation the others were having was waiting to an answer to a question she hadn't even asked. "Well…"

"Well…what?" Ashley asked her, thoroughly amused.

"I'm gay,"

"So I've heard,"

"Are you gay?"

Ashley turned on the charm, giving the woman a smile she couldn't help but return. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

Spencer nodded and the brunette, in spite of the audience, brought her hands up to the blonde's cheeks. "Well, I'll tell you then," she whispered, brushing her cheeks with her thumbs. "Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" Spencer echoed, face twisted up. But she wanted to know tonight.

"Yes, tomorrow, sugar," Ashley stated again, pulling out her bag. She handed the cab driver enough money for her trip and for the other women in the vehicle to get home safely. Then she dug around until she found what she was looking for.

She grabbed Spencer's hand and turned the palm upward, scribbling her personal number onto the fair skin, signing her name at the bottom. "There," she said, closing her hand up delicately and looking the blonde in the eyes before getting out of the cab. "Don't forget to call me, sugar."

"I won't," Spencer assured her, looking like a kid who'd gotten a brand new fire truck or something. "I owe you a lap dance. I have to call you."

She waved goofily at the other woman as the cab tore off down the street, rolling down the window and yelling, "I love you Dark Angel!" into the night.

--

Pain.

That's all that registered.

Complete and total pain.

And…fluffiness…

…the hell?

Spencer jerked awake, pulling her face away from Bunny, the purple stuffed rabbit she'd been given as a gift.

She found it strange that the thing had made it to her bed but then she realized she wasn't in her bed.

She was on the floor.

Why was she on the floor?

Why did her head hurt?

Why…why…why were the Spice Girls taking refuge in her kitchen?

_Yo, I'll tell you what I want what I really really want,  
So tell me what you want what you really really want  
I'll tell you what I want what I really really want,  
So tell me what you want what you really really want  
I wanna I wanna I wanna I wanna I wanna really really really wanna zigazig ha_

Cadence and Jessica – the quicker waker-upper – decided that it'd be in their best interest to dance around the kitchen singing Wannabe to their heart's delight, as they made breakfast.

Only problem with that was a way hung-over Spencer felt like she finally understood people who committed double-homicides.

"Don't kill us," Jessica warmed, holding up a spatula. "We made French toast."

And all was forgiven because even if you sautéed Spencer's pet fish for dinner she'd forgive you in an instant if you made her French toast.

The woman smiled as best she could and it came out like more of a grimace but still, she was glad for the food because she needed something to chase this hang-over away.

"How you feeling Lesbo?" Cadence asked, setting the plate of food in front of Spencer as she sat down. "Still queer and shit?"

"Pretty much," Spencer managed to mumble, pouring syrup over her food before frowning. "Damn, how much did I drink last night?"

"Enough to lose your ever-loving mind," Jessica stated, sitting down at the dining table as well. "You made out with a stripper."

Spencer gasped, nearly choking on a piece of toast she was so shocked. "I did not," she affirmed, eyes wide. "Did I?"

"Nah," Cadence assured her after letting her sweat it out though. "But you did promise to call her in the morning and I'm fairly certain that she's looking forward to your call."

And now the pieces came into place for Spencer; the strip club, the liquor, the…Angel.

"Dark Angel," she whispered, brining her hand up to inspect her palm. "She gave me her number," she stated again, eyes tripping over the smudged written Ashley.

"Mmm hmm," Jessica mumbled, sharing a look with Cadence. "So, are you gonna call her?"

They already knew the answer.

"No."

Or not.

"Why not?" Cadence asked, seriously confused. Spencer was all over the girl last night and she, though having a fully functional breeder meter, could pick up on those vibes with her eyes closed.

"Because…" Spencer trailed off, hunching her shoulders. "She's a stripper."

"Oh my God," Jessica stated huffily, cutting her eyes at Cadence. "I told you she was gonna say that."

"I didn't know she would be so snooty," Cadence defended. "Sue me."

"Snooty?" Spencer questioned. "Since when did I become snooty?"

"Since you decided you were too good for a stripper," Jessica said, "Seriously, this is the same type of reverse-feminist attitude I'm trying to overcome with my thesis."

"Ew, Jess. No school talk on a Sunday," Cadence said, annoyed but still agreeing with the girl. "But seriously though Spence. That's fucked up."

"What? I don't want the first relationship I have to be with some woman who has diseases or something,"

Jessica chocked on an indignant scoff but Cadence held her hand up to stop the words from coming. "Spencer, I'm going to give you a pass for that shit. I keep forgetting you grew up in rural Ohio," she mumbled, rolling her eyes. "But, the woman you're referring to is a stripper not a prostitute. Huge difference."

Spencer sat back, petulant. "Still, she makes money by taking off her clothes. What could we possibly have in common?"

"You'll never know if you don't _call_ _her_," Jessica stated with emphasis, placing the cordless phone down heavily on the table in front of her. "You have to now. I refuse to let you say no."

Spencer picked up the phone slowly, trying to mask her real reasoning for her hesitation in calling this woman. Aside form the fact that she could clearly recall seeing her naked, there was this overwhelming embarrassment she had from a somewhat more than drunk declaration of love.

Yeah, those kind of first impressions were hard to erase.

Plus, yeah, hello, straight out the closet, that was her. How much _je ne sais quoi_ didn't she have?

But in the end her decision was made for her by some rather annoying, yet well-meaning roommates/friends. And lucky for her, Ashley was an early riser.

--

"Hello?"

"Hi…um…Ashley," Spencer stuttered out, still being gently coaxed by her friends.

"Yes. Who is this?"

"Spencer…you know, uh, from the club?"

"I know who you are," Ashley drawled and Spencer could almost feel her smiling.

"Well, I told you I would call you in the morning. So, here I am…calling you,"

"That you are,"

"And you are…"

"Actually, I didn't think you were going to call," Ashley honestly shared.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. You didn't seem like the type to frequent strip clubs and you certainly didn't seem like the type that wanted to get to know a stripper,"

"Yeah, well, seems like you were wrong,"

"Glad to hear it,"

"And I actually would like to get to know you, Ashley. You know, in the actual light of day and with a little…no, a lot less booze,"

"That…sounds like a plan, Spencer,"

Spencer beamed dorkily, from hearing her finally say her name and from the prospect of actual progression. "So…"

"So…?"

"What are you doing tonight?"

"I wasn't planning on doing anything,"

"Okay," Spencer nodded slowly, still getting encouragement from her girls. "Would you like to–"

"Yes,"

"But I didn't even ask–"

"Yes, to whatever you're going to ask,"

Spencer finally broke out into a bright smile, her cheeks reddening. "Okay, I'll see you later then."

"Bye sugar. Oh and Spencer?"

"Hmm?"

"I want my lap dance."


	38. Building Squares

When I first saw her I thought she was crazy.

The second time I saw her I knew she was crazy.

And the third time, well, I knew it was love.

/

Ashley was in to work a couple minutes later than her usual time, and usually little mishaps like that threw her off for the whole shift.

But not this day. Nope, this day something was different.

It was a week before Thanksgiving and she'd been working at the home improvement store for a good year now and she knew just about everybody there was to know, but with it being the holiday time the store had lobbied for some new employees and one of those new employees was named Spencer Carlin.

Of course, she didn't know that. Not at first.

"Hey Aiden, man. What's up?" she asked the boy, walking over to the unusually slow paint counter.

She noticed someone in the corner near one of the larger paint can shakers, but didn't pay them too much mind.

"Nothing, really, Ash. Just checking on the inventory," he said, pointing out his clipboard. "What about you?"

"My department's dead tonight," she said with a sigh, gesturing back over her shoulder.

"No offense, Ash, but isn't Décor dead every night?"

"Touché," the girl said, stepping around to the back of the counter. The person, she now noticed, was another girl, and one she'd not noticed before at the paint desk.

And from the back, this one was making one hell of a first impression. "Who's that? Ya'll get somebody new or something?" she asked, ignoring some random customer trying to flag her down.

Just because we're wearing orange does not make this a runway.

The girl stood up slowly and turned around even slower, or at least that how it seemed to Ashley. The blonde with blue eyes quirked a smile, flirtatious even on a Sunday and strode over to the pair, hand extending in introduction.

"Hey, I'm Spencer," the girl said, wrapping her hand securely around Ashley's who was truly taken aback by the gesture. Like, really, who shakes hands. And did she really need to tell her her name, I mean, it was right there across her ches – oops.

"You, uh, you gonna be working over here?"

The girl smiled again, alluring. "No," she said, looking around briefly. "I'm just…visiting."

"O…kay," Ashley said, cutting a look in Aiden's direction and the boy merely shrugged, wearing that look on his face that says, "I know…she's weird. But she's hot and I'm a guy so…"

"Yeah," Spencer said, biting back a smile and spinning around suddenly to go back to the paint shaker.

This time they both checked her out.

/

The next time she saw her she made a complete fool out of herself. Well, at least that's what she thought.

So, you know, Ashley is, was, will forever be gay and, as far as she knew, everyone she worked with wasn't.

But there were still hot girls there and yeah, she could look, right? No harm in that.

Well, this Spencer. This Spencer had been assigned the task of pushing around a cart with gift cards attached to it. All the while wearing that elf hat, you know, the one with the ears on it.

So, yeah, she was looking super cute and Ashley couldn't help but stare and this time the girl found her, just as she was stocking away some faucets because that's what she does.

"Hey," Spencer said, pushing the cart over and Ashley pretended she'd just seen her.

"Oh, hey. Hey. What's up?"

"Would you like to purchase a gift card?" she asked, tilting her head in this way that was sweet but still sexy. Swexy maybe? Nah. "It's the perfect gift for that someone special?"

And while there's a lot of things Ashley probably wanted to say, this more than likely was not one of them. "What's your last name?"

Spencer looked – understandably – taken aback. "What?"

"What's um…your last name?" Ashley looked at the floor, probably wondering why it hadn't opened up yet.

Spencer smiled again, her actual ears turning red. "Card."

"Card?"

"Yes, Card,"

"Ha," Ashley laughed, somewhat, knowing there's a joke in there somewhere. "Spencer Card handing out the Cards…" That…wasn't the joke.

Spencer, though, took it in stride and ignored, well, as much as she could, the color blaring across Ashley's face. "Right…" she said, dragging the word out just so Ashley knew she was just kidding. "Well, I'll see you later."

"Yeah," Ashley said, waving three fingers at the girl. "Later."

/

The third time, well… she already told you.

Ashley was glad to be finally headed to lunch, because man, were these customers ever stupid.

"_Hi,"_

"_Hi. Hello, how can I help you?"_

"_Right. Yes. Um, I'd like to get blinds for every window in my house,"_

"_Oh, okay. Do you have any measurements?"_

"_Measure…"_

"_What size are the windows?"_

"_Oh. Oh. Standard size. You know, like regular,"_

Oy vey.

Anyway, that alone would be enough to make someone want to jump off of a very high balcony so she was very much looking forward to this hour-long break.

But just as she was rounding the corner into the employee's longue she crashed, well, nearly crashed into none other than Spencer Carlin.

Oh yeah, in between this and the last time, she'd found out that the whole card thing was just a joke – on her of course – but a joke nonetheless.

She stumbled back, barely recognizing the girl. "Oops, sorry," she stuttered out, thrown by the close proximity and Spencer just tilted her head, looking up at her with bright sparkling eyes.

"I love you," the blonde said, sounding very innocent and very much like a little kid but Ashley's face went aflame because, oh man, she totally loved this girl too.

/

So it came to be that this Spencer girl and this Ashley chick vibed really well, but only when Ashley was not going completely bonkers with her straight girl crush or when Spencer, maybe taking her medication, toned down the crazy. But whatever the case, they were becoming fast friends, but only this because Ashley was gay and Spencer was straight, right?

Right.

"So," Spencer started, one night when they were having lunch in the break room together, and this totally threw Ashley off-track by the way. "You kind of remind me of my ex-girlfriend."

Wrong.

/

"She's gay dude," Ashley hissed and Aiden almost dropped the can of paint he was handing to a customer.

"What?" he asked her, not sure he'd heard her right.

"You just want to hear me say it again," she said.

"Maybe…"

"Oh man," Ashley groaned, stomach turning. It was okay when she was unreachable but now…now…

"Don't trip, Ash. You're gay. She's gay. I say you're in,"

Ashley wouldn't let herself be too easily influenced. "Or she's bi…or was bi, before the ex-girlfriend and now she's all about the penis,"

The lady at the counter gasped, clutching her chest. "I don't want any peanuts, Ash," Aiden said quickly, smiling at the woman while handing her her can of paint. "Here you go, ma'am."

"I'm so confused," Ashley said wearily, sighing as she dropped her head to the paint counter.

"Aww, buddy. Don't be confused," Aiden said, rubbing her shoulders. "She likes ya," he whispered in her ear, leaning down. "I'm sure of it."

Ashley looked up at him. "How do you know?" Aiden nodded his head forward and Ashley looked up where she was presented with the vision of a rather nervous looking Spencer.

"Hey," the girl said, giving a little wave.

"Hi," Ashley whispered, moving to stand up properly.

"Um…what time are you working until tonight?"

"Oh, uh, 9:30 because I gotta catch my bus, you know?"

"Right. Right. Well, um, I get off at ten,"

Ashley wasn't following. "You ride the bus too?"

"Um, no. I drive,"

"Okay. Cool," Ashley said, squeezing her fingers so tightly.

"Okay then. I'll…see you," Spencer said, slowly walking away.

"See you," Ashley repeated, watching her leave.

SMACK!

"Ow!" she said, rubbing the back of her head. "What the hell, Aiden?"

"Oh, shut up. You're lucky I only hit you with one of the paint sticks with all these cans lying around,"

"Oh, well, yes excuse me while I thank my lucky stars that you hit me in the head with a stick," she said, rolling her eyes. "_Why_ did you hit me Aiden?"

"She was _trying_ to offer you a ride home, moron,"

"What?" Ashley's face screwed up. "No, she wasn't."

"Uh, she totally was. In fact, I bet you ten bucks if you go up to her and make up some story about not having enough bus fare or something she would totally leap at the opportunity to take you home."

"You think?"

/

"Hey…Spencer," Ashley haltingly said, approaching the girl while she was working the register.

"Hey, Ash," Spencer said, turning away from her fellow cashier and devoting her attention solely to Ashley, or 'Ash'.

Yeah, Ashley was done for.

"Uh…I, uh, missed my last bus and um, I might be spending the night here unless I get a ride so, uh…" Ashley never ever found the shellac concrete floor so interesting before.

"Do you need a ride Ashley?"

"Yes please."

What's ten bucks, really?

/

A week later and the pair was inseparable, even turning into a trio of sorts when Aiden was reluctantly dragged into their conversations. Even though no ground had been covered on that whole gay/bi/straight thing.

"So, what kind of guys do you like Spencer because I gotta tell ya', Ashley here has the weirdest taste in men," Aiden was saying, laughing when Ashley almost choked on her straw.

"Oh yeah?" Spencer asked more amused than anything else.

"Uh huh," Aiden said, smiling all the while. "She's really into thugs too. But like white thugs, you know? Like Marky Mary or…Eminem."

Spencer's faced scrunched up in disgust. "Eminem? Ew, no. He walks like he has a stick up his ass. I mean, he walks like his ass had a stroke or something."

Aiden lost it, nearly smacking his head on the table he laughed so hard but Ashley just stared in amazement.

Spencer winked and that's when she knew for sure.

/

"Hey, you," Spencer said, smiling at Ashley as the girl bravely approached Spencer and a group of co-workers.

"Hey, yourself," Ashley said, strutting over looking confident. "You should drop these heroes and get with a zero…" the girl trailed off, realizing much too late that she'd said the line wrong, much to the amusement of everybody else.

But it was worth it and she'd do it again if Spencer promised she'd smile like that.

"Can I, uh, ask you something?"

"You can,"

"May I?"

"Amscray girls, Ashley needs to ask me something in private,"

When they finally left and Ashley had enough time to finally start blanking on the nerves, she settled back against the counter nervously.

"So, what are you gonna ask me out or something?" Spencer asked, smirking a little.

"No," Ashley squeaked, feeling a little sick.

"That's too bad," Spencer said with an exaggerated pout. "Well, when are you going to?"

"Ask you out?"

Spencer nodded.

"You want me to?"

Spencer nodded again, this time smiling.

"Um…Spencer?"

"Wanna go out sometime?"

Spencer smiled fully. "I would love to."


	39. Blinded By Beauty

**Author's Note: I hate this new formatting. As always, these characters do not belong to me. Although if they did, life would be grand.**

* * *

The first thing Ashley ever saw was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.

And not only because it was the first.

But the moment she laid her blurry vision on Spencer Carlin, she knew she'd never be able to see anything else.

But that's not the beginning of this story – not in the least.

So, let's start where it does.

* * *

The bell rang and all at once the classroom burst forth with life again.

The almost dull drone of geometric proofs and the constant ticking of the clock all fell to the background as once again the children started chatting, notebooks closing and papers shuffling, zippers on backpacks being unzipped and then zipped again.

Stacy Hanson popped another piece of bubblegum in her mouth, discarding the wrapper to the floor. Aiden Dennison took out his cell to shoot of a quick text.

All of these were things that were happening – at rapid speed and all at once – and still she sat there, face turned front ways, still moving her fingers along the last line on the page of her Braille version of Shakespeare's _Romeo & Juliet_.

Because Ashley couldn't see, and it was pointless to move until some of the traffic cleared away.

Finally the scraping of chairs died down and she closed her book, reaching behind her for her on backpack and placing the item inside. She put away her voice recorder too, the device so essential in her learning anything at school.

"Ashley," she heard a tentative voice say, but even still she knew who it was and that she was nearly a step away.

"Yes, Mrs. Potter," the girl answered, tugging self-consciously on a curl.

"Your father called and asked me to prepare a three month-long lesson plan for you," the kind woman said, her palms lightly resting on Ashley's desk. She could tell. She felt the subtle shift in weight.

At once it dawned on Ashley and she smiled, never a good poker player. She turned her face in the woman's general direction. "Yes. I'm going to be out of school for a little while. I'm having surgery."

"Oh, no. Dear, what's wrong?" the woman asked, sounding alarmed.

"Oh nothing," Ashley rushed to say, shaking her head for having been misunderstood. "I'm having surgery done on my eyes. Regenerative so…" her cheeks burned red here and she couldn't help feeling somewhat excited. "…I might be able to see."

"That's…great Dear," Mrs. Potter said, as warmly as she could.

But Ashley could still hear it, the doubt in her voice, and sometimes she really was grateful for being blind because sometimes it's hard enough to hear things.

* * *

She'd been blind her entire life – since birth – and ever since the day the doctor slapped her on the bottom all Ashley could ever remember seeing was darkness.

Even with the heat of the sun beating down on her face and staring directly into the sky, her eyes would tear up, but nothing would ever change and then they'd tear up for an entirely different reason.

Her mother couldn't deal with it. And part of it may have been the fact that she blamed herself entirely for the "defect", only stopping drinking liquor once she realized dumbly that it wasn't okay to miss your fourth straight period in a row. And the other part: she wasn't ready to be a mother, let alone the mother to a handicapped child and so Christine left one night, when Ashley was too young to even _know_ her let alone miss her and never came back.

Her father stuck around. And he – a boy of only twenty-two – put all of his life's ambitions on hold and was there for his baby girl. And he didn't always do the "right" thing. She cut her teeth at the Brew Crew Pub at a Dodgers game but he was always there for her – encouraging her. Telling her, always telling her, that she was no different from anyone else and if anything, her lack of vision was a privilege. She didn't have to see all the ugly things in the world.

But she still heard them.

The insults, the harsh words, the ignorance when she didn't reply to being spoken to because "Hey you" is _not_ her name. She couldn't see a thing but she could still feel and feeling, well, that was universal.

* * *

"Hey Hon."

She'd been expecting him for a while now, his car having pulled up a couple of minutes ago.

"Hi Daddy," she said, sticking out her cheek and he planted one on her, joining his daughter on the couch.

"So, what're we watching?"

Ashley could smell his cologne and it was relatively strong for this time of day, considering he'd been working all day.

"Oooooh, so Extra is talking about how that Michael Jackson doctor, Conrad Murray, well he tipped this waitress like five bucks or something on an eighty dollar meal. And now they're like 'see, he totally killed Mike'. Like, that's their proof," she gushed. She loved her some celebrity faux gossip.

"I can see it," he father said, trying to keep his voice on an even keel.

"I already know you got 'em Daddy," Ashley said, grinning and grasping for his hand.

He scoffed, bringing her hand up to kiss her knuckles. "How'd you know?"

"You're wearing too much cologne and…" she shook his hand, still in hers. "Your hand is sticky."

"Busted," he chuckled out, shaking his head at her. "They're on the kitchen counter. Just don't eat the whole dozen okay."

Ashley launched herself at the man, hugging him gleefully. "Thank you," she gushed, grabbing her walking stick and flicking it out to its full length.

A few seconds later she was in the kitchen, enjoying the noisy silence as always and the most deliciously sinful strawberry glazed Krispy Kreme donuts in the world when the doorbell rang.

"Dad?" she called out, but judging from the distant sound of water running he'd already made it to the shower.

Relying on the cane, even though she had the layout of their house memorized, she walked over to the front door, grappling for the door knob.

"Who is it?"

"My name is Glen. Glen Carlin. Is, uh, a Mr. Davies in?"

"He's not available at the moment," Ashley called through the door.

"Oh, uh, well…I'm from the hospital – the regenerative gene ward. Just um…tell him I came by I guess."

Ashley knows way better than to do this now and she knew it then too but when he said hospital she threw all caution to the wind.

"You're from the hospital?" she asked, swinging the door open rapidly.

She could tell by the rush of air that he had spun around suddenly and probably was already prepared to leave.

"Uh, yes. Yes I am. Are you…Ashley?" the man asked and she blushed, knowing why he knew that already.

"Yes. I am."

"It's nice to meet you Ashley. We'll be getting to know one another soon," he said, and then fidgeted. She could hear him. "I mean, because I'm on the team. The team working to restore…your…um…vision."

"I know. I know. No, it's good to meet you," the girl said, stepping aside. "Come in. I'll go get Daddy. He's just upstairs."

"Take your time," the man said, waiting in the foyer.

As Ashley carefully turned away, this man, this Glen Carlin, stood there in the foyer awkwardly. He suddenly regretted still wearing his lab coat and also suddenly became aware that his glasses were smudged and so that's what he was doing when father and daughter came back to meet him.

"Can I help you?" her father asked, dressed down now and still drying his hair.

"Hi Mr. Davies," Glen said, clearing his throat. "I'm Glen Carlin. Dr. Glen Carlin, the head specialist regarding your daughter's transplant."

"Oh, yes. We've spoken. I…well, I actually thought you'd be a lot older," Mr. Davies said, chuckling a little as he shook the young man's hand. "How old are you, twenty?"

"Close," the doctor laughed. "Really close. Twenty-two, actually."

"Well, tell me Doctor Carlin. Do you regularly make house calls? This is a little unusual, no?"

"Ashley's case is a little unusual," Dr. Carlin agreed and Ashley deflated a little.

She made sure to hang back, not wanting to hear everything in case her hopes were being dashed this evening.

"You see, we've, my team and I, never had a regenerative case where the patient had been blinded since birth. It's a bit of a shock, I'd imagine. Physically, mentally, and emotionally," he continued. "And yes, I'm a very hands-on doctor, Sir. And so, I'm telling you today that it is my personal and professional recommendation that Ashley undergo pre-operation psychotherapy. Just to make this transition as smooth as possible for her."

"Is that…" Ashley croaked out, speaking up uncharacteristically. She was definitely good at being the child seen but not heard. "…like a shrink or something?"

Glen had forgotten she was there and jumped a little, touching his glasses again. "Yes, Ashley. But, you're not crazy or anything. We just want you to be comfortable with everything, okay? And like I said, this is just my professional suggestion. You don't have to do anything," he assured her and her father.

"But I really think you should."

* * *

So that's why in her first week away from school, prepping for her procedure, Ashley was sitting in some therapist's office, wondering if it was possible for furniture to actually violate your ass.

Because the sofa she was sitting on was doing a pretty good job.

Her head shot up suddenly.

"Aw…you heard me," a woman's voice said, sounding lyrical and youthful.

Ashley smiled, instantly at ease. "I have super-hearing. Like Superman."

The woman laughed grandly, her voice moving closer to Ashley. "Or Superwoman."

Ashley raised an eyebrow. "Touché."

"So…I'm guessing you know what I'm in here for already so I think I should get to the formal introductions. I'm Madison Duarte. But you can just call me Madison."

Ashley was about to move to stand, hand outstretched when she felt her palm turned front-ways, getting slapped in greeting. "Uh…okay," she giggled, surprised at the gesture. "I'm Ashley, but you can call me Ashley."

"Well, it's very nice to meet you Ashley. So…tell me about yourself. Anything you think is important for me to know." Madison sat across from the girl, grabbing a notebook and uncapping a pen, ready to get down to business.

Ashley thought for second or two, tapping her walking stick against the low pile shag carpeting. "Okay, well, I'm a girl…obviously. I'm seventeen years old. I'm a junior at King High. My dad is the greatest dad on the planet, hands down. I really, really want a dog. And, I have the most obsession-ary relationship with strawberry-glazed Krispy Kreme Donuts. Also…" Ashley trailed off, leaning closer to the therapist. "I…I like girls."

She felt her cheeks heating up because she could feel the woman's eyes on her, judging.

"Is that all?" Madison asked her, her voice completely neutral and if Ashley weren't mistaken she detected a little amusement in there as well.

"The most important things, yeah." Ashley shrugged, not knowing what else to supply.

And Madison merely scribbled on line down onto her notepad.

_She mentioned nothing of being blind._

* * *

"Daddy, I'm scared," she whispered lying in the too big hospital room. She'd been very brave nearly all her life but the possibility of this going all wrong scared her beyond her own comprehension.

She wanted to see, more than anything at times, but maybe what was meant to be should be.

"Don't worry, Ashley," Dr. Carlin's soothing voice broke through her apprehension. "I promise we'll take good care of you."

"And I'll be right here for you, okay, baby," her father said, squeezing the hand he was holding. "As soon as you wake up, I'll be right here."

"It's time, Mr. Davies," Dr. Carlin informed the man, lowering the rails on her bed to transfer her to the mobile cart. "We'll have her back before you know it," the young man said with a smile, partially hidden by a surgical mask. But the older man could see it in his eyes and saw the care with which the young doctor's team was treating his daughter. He felt some of his anxiety relinquish which was exactly what Ashley needed.

They rolled her down the hall – and Ashley's cart had one squeaky wheel, she could tell – and into to theatre where the procedure was to be done.

"Now, Ashley, I'm going to put this mask on your face. It's gas and it's meant to help you relax, okay? You're going to get sleepy," Dr. Carlin went on to say, speaking aloud in the room as his staff worked diligently to prepare the girl. "Don't fight it. Just start counting. Keep counting until you just feel yourself float away."

She thought she made it to thirty-three.

* * *

"I think she's coming to."

Ashley groggily shifted in bed for a moment, trying to sort through her jumbled thoughts. She remembered therapy, the squeaky wheel.

Oh.

Ashley sprung forward, opening her eyes and peering into…into…

"It's all black," she rasped out, feeling hands gently push her back down.

"They've got your eyes still bandaged right now, sweetie," her father said, holding her hand tightly. "They may be very sensitive to the light and exposing them too soon could be retroactive."

She almost felt like crying. Of course, it wouldn't be that easy.

"Do we know anything?"

"Actually, Ashley, it's looking very well," the young Doctor Carlin was on hand for this. "While you were out we did some preliminary testing and your pupils were dilating when they previously had not, so I'm very hopeful. It's just going to take a little time before your sight will be fully restored. You have to understand, this is a completely new experience for your body, and it's just like anything else new we try, we have to practice first. That's all it is. Practice for your eyes."

Ashley nodded, understanding and glad that he was being so descriptive with his explanations.

"So…" she started, turning her face his way. "When can we start?"

* * *

"Hey Ashley," Dr. Carlin stated, sitting in front of her she could tell.

They were in a quiet room and it was just the two of them.

"Yes?"

"I want to introduce you to someone. She's going to be sitting in on our session this afternoon. Her name's Spencer Carlin. She's my younger sister," the young doctor seemed to ramble on endlessly and Ashley actually grew somewhat bored at the exchange, ready to get down to work…to see.

"Hi Ashley," the young woman spoke up, and Ashley was surprised to find that she was already in the room and probably as young as she was.

"Spencer's really interested in physical therapy so I thought she could sit in with us, that is, if it's okay with you?"

"It's fine," Ashley dismissed easily, smiling in their direction – she hoped.

"Sweet," Spencer said with a grin, sitting in the chair next to her brother and Glen rolled his eyes.

"Okay, Ashley. I'm going to take off your bandages now and, just a warning, there might be a little pain or discomfort as your eyes adjust to the light in the room.

Ashley felt the pressure around her head slacken as layer upon layer of bandage was unwrapped from around her head. Her stomach clenched over and over and she gripped the arm rests of her chair so tightly, she thought her nails would etch clear into the wood. And no sooner had she thought that were soft hands grasping her own, prying them away from the chair and holding on tightly.

And he stomach flipped for an entirely different reason.

Finally, the last of the bandaging fell away, but Ashley's eyes were shit tightly, afraid of what she might see…or might not see.

"Open your eyes, Ashley," Glen gently commanded and she squeezed them shut even tighter.

She shook her head, feeling a tear wind its way down her cheek. "I can't."

"You can," he implored, keeping his voice as low as possible. "You can do anything."

"It's okay, Ashley," the other girl in the room said and Ashley realized with a shock that this was the person in front of her now, the girl holding her hands. "I promise."

Ashley squinted one eye open and then the other and the black poured in. The same blackness she'd always seen, but wait…there were shadows – one shadow. There was a silhouette hovering right in front of her.

"Can you see me Ashley?" the girl asked and Ashley almost fainted, because she could. She saw the figure move and everything. AS she focused more the silhouette grew more pronounced and the light and dark played out in her sight like a grayscale.

Ashley felt the tears flow freely now. She could see. She could see.

She nodded, squeezing the hands holding her own so tightly she thought for sure she must have been hurting her.

"We're in a dark room, Ashley," Glen said quietly, not wanting to ruin the tranquility of the moment. "There's as little light in here as possible because I don't want to shock your system. But I want you to be sure. Can you see Spencer?"

Ashley nodded, feeling her throat constrict. "I can," she whispered, blinking slowly. "I really and truly can."

* * *

"So, what's up Ashley?"

Ashley sat there on the uncomfortable sofa and tried to stop the smile from breaking out – tried being the operative word.

She tapped her walking stick nervously again, her heavy dark glasses shifting as the smile broke free.

"I'm good," she said, understatement of the year.

Madison smiled too, shifting in her chair and Ashley saw it all. Still a little blurry around the edges but she saw it.

"I can see that," the therapist said, scribbling on her notepad. "Any particular reason why?"

"Well…there's the obvious one," Ashley slowly stated, feeling herself get a little giddy. Of all the people recently introduced into her life, Madison was clearly the easiest to talk to, about everything. And there was this one thing over the course of the past months that's been growing and growing and now it was getting a little ridiculous. "I can see."

"How's that coming along?"

"It's going great. Every day my eyes are getting less sensitive to the light and I can see things a little bit clearer."

"That's great Ashley." Madison truly sounded elated for her.

"Yeah…" And there she was drifting away again.

Madison took note of the small inscrutable smile on her face, a knowing look on her face. "Got something else to share?"

Ashley shook out of her reverie, focusing once again on the therapist – the therapist now looking at her as if she knew exactly what the girl was thinking.

"Um…is it only between us?" Ashley asked, feeling her face heat up.

"Always," Madison whispered, hunching closer on her chair as Ashley did the same.

"I have a crush," Ashley whispered, her cheeks aflame.

Madison grinned, eyes sparkling. "Is that so?"

Ashley nodded, speech abandoning her for the moment.

"Do I know this person?"

Ashley nodded again. "I think so."

"Hmm…"Madison pretended to think. "Oh, I know, Dr. Carlin."

Ashley's jaw dropped. "What? No. Absolutely and categorically no."

Madison laughed, tapping her pen against the margin of her notepad. "I'm just kidding, but your reaction was pretty priceless. I know who it is."

"You do?"

Madison nodded. "Mmm hmm."

Ashley tapped her foot nervously on the floor, looking away momentarily. "What should I do?"

"About…?"

"Madison," Ashley gruffed, not enjoying but secretly adoring the subtle teasing from the therapist. She was like the big sister the girl never had.

"Well, my motto is and always has been 'Carpe diem'," Madison said, watching the slow understanding wash across Ashley's features. "But then again, that's just me."

Ashley swallowed. "What about…"

"The way I see it, life is about risks and rewards," Madison started, sitting back slightly. "We all take risks just by living. Your dad raised you alone. That was a major risk. But look at how great you turned out. Major reward. Your surgery was a pretty big risk but-"

"Now I can see," Ashley finished that one for her.

"Now you can see," Madison reiterated. "The best reward."

Madison let her stick go, letting it stay propped against the sofa. "She might say no."

Madison nodded, conceding the point. "That's true. But what if she says yes?"

* * *

"Got any threes?" he asks.

"Aww man," Ashley says, handing them over.

Her dad chuckles, taking the pair of cards and turning them over. "You've gotten really bad at this game."

"It's because I can see the cards now. Spencer says I can't help my eyes from telling my hand."

"Spencer may be right," he says, smiling at his little girl. "So, we're going home in a few days."

"Uh huh," Ashley said, nodding as she sifted her cards around.

"Excited?"

"Yes," she said, shifting a little. "I like it here and all but I can't wait to get back to my own bed."

"That's too bad," Dr. Carlin speaks up from the door. "Because we're going to miss you around here. You're our miracle patient you know?"

"How so?"

"Well, it's a miracle that Spencer even shows up for work but since you've been here," he starts with a shrug, wincing as the blow came almost instantaneously.

"Shut up," the blonde murmured, crashing into the room as well. "Jerk," she added when he laughed. "Hi Mr. Davies," the girl said, a little reluctant to meet Ashley's gaze but then she did and Ashley felt the room swim a little. "Hi Ash."

"Hey, Spence."

Glen adjusted his spectacles again and cleared his throat, gesturing to door to Mr. Davies. "Can I talk to you for a moment, Sir? It's regarding Ashley's at home care."

"Okay," Mr. Davies said, patting his daughter's knee and kissing her on the forehead quickly as he got up to leave.

"_Dad_," the brunette grumbled, blushing fiercely at Spencer having witnessed the exchange, feeling all of twelve-years-old all of a sudden.

Her father chuckled and soon he and Dr. Carlin were out in the hallway, speaking in hushed voices. And a few months ago, Ashley would have heard the entire exchange as if they were standing right next to her but with the addition of her fifth sense, the others had become somewhat muted, her hearing no longer at a superhuman level.

"My brother says you're leaving soon," Spencer said, twisting her fingers as she stood at the side of the girl's bed.

"Yeah," Ashley told her, running a finger along the bedspread. "In a couple days."

"I'm gonna miss you," Spencer said, taking Ashley's roaming finger and grabbing the tip. "A lot."

"You don't have to." Her eyes were trained on where they were connected, one girl tentatively holding onto the other, in more ways than one. "We can still…" she swallowed. "…be friends."

Spencer moved their hands, slowly tangling her fingers with the brunette's. "And what if I don't want that?"

Ashley's heart dove down to her stomach and that fell down to the floor. "Um…"

"What if I want to be…more…than friends?" There it was, sitting out there for Ashley to take. The biggest risk.

Ashley's heart stopped and Spencer's other hand moved to take off the girl's dark glasses, removing the only barrier between them – their connection. "Can you see me Ashley? Can't you see me?"

And it all hit her then.

Everything.

The shy smiles and stolen glances.

The laughter and giggles and the tears and shared struggles.

The hugs and touches, always lasting too long or causing her to flush deeply and find a topic of neutral standing to clear the tension.

The first time she watched a movie, Aladdin and a sleepover of sorts – the blonde at her side the entire time and through the morning.

The first time she saw the ocean, the endless blue matching superbly with the blue of the other girl's eyes.

The first time she saw anything – ever – and the vision was and still is quite possibly the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.

Even now, with those blue eyes looking directly into her own, hiding nothing, Ashley never had seen anything more beautiful than that.

And the tears fell because she could see, she could see it all and wished only she'd have seen it sooner. Wasted time, but no, not wasted. Never wasted.

"I see you," Ashley whispered, a tremulous smile stretching slowly across her face. "I've never seen anything else."

* * *

Ashley sat outside of school, backpack sitting neatly upon her shoulder.

She fidgeted with her skirt just a bit, smoothing out the wrinkles caused from sitting all day.

"Hey Ashley," some nameless jock says, smiling prettily at her. His voice was familiar but it didn't matter.

Not now.

"Ash," she heard her say and spun around instantly, throwing her arms around the taller girl's neck.

"Spence," she whispered, grinning widely.

The blonde's eyes sparkled, wrapping her own arms around her waist. "Ready to go?"

Ashley stared up at her – the way her hair shone in the midday sunlight. The way her eyes twinkled like clear blue sapphires. The subtle pink hue working its way across her cheeks as Ashley continued to stare, unabashed. "What's the rush?" she murmured, not closing her eyes as she planted a kiss on the girl's warm and waiting lips. "I'm enjoying the view."


	40. Bonnie & Claudia

**A/N: DatSoNfan - That has got to be one of the funniest comments/reviews I've ever gotten. It made me laugh for a good three minutes. Thank you for that.**

"Here you go sir and thank you for banking with S.O.N. bank. We bring the Spash and keep your cash."

The gentleman smiled confusingly, having no idea what 'spash' was but since he'd conducted his business and gotten his money he didn't care.

Ashley breathed out a deep breath, her feet throbbing incessantly. It was lunch rush hour, the worst time of day for the bank because every Tom, Susan, Dick, and Mary decided last minute that they had some very necessary banking to get done in ten minutes flat – so they could still partake in lunch.

Hence the bank tellers were shown no mercy.

As it was though, she might just be able to make it to the bathroom and back before someone noticed that her window was unoccupied or before some idiot customer decided to complain about the one 'closed' sign.

She was just about to step away when, curses, another customer stepped to her window, looking windswept.

The woman pushed the hair away from her ear, looking quickly at Ashley before taking one of the scraps of paper available for customers to write down their passwords and scribbling intently on it.

Ashley took a moment to observe the woman and in that moment decided that she was very beautiful and maybe she'd make a little play before this interaction was over.

"Good afternoon Miss. Thank you for choosing S.O.N. My name is Ashley. What can I do for you today?" she asked her, her voice pleasant yet with an undertone of 'you know you want it'. If the other woman played on her side of the fence she'd pick up on it.

The woman, blonde, smiled slightly before pushing the note under the glass, gesturing for Ashley to read it.

Ashley smiled too, picking the little slip of paper up and reading it quickly.

_Do what I say and no one will get hurt. Empty all of the cash out of your till and don't try anything stupid. I have a gun and I will use it._

The smile slowly dropped from Ashley's face and she felt her heart pick up pace tremendously. Looking up quickly with wide eyes she saw the blonde woman staring intently at her, gesturing to her waistline where indeed there was a gun handle sticking out.

Ashley immediately panicked, all the training they'd put them through for situations like these completely leaving her mind.

All that her mind was fixated on was the shiny metal thing on the woman's hip and the surprisingly sparkly blue eyes boring into her.

The blonde woman glanced around again, raising her eyebrows signaling for Ashley to get to it and she finally broke out of her stupor, punching keys and entering passwords until her till drawer opened. There she withdrew everything she had, stuffing it into an envelope and forcefully pushing the thick package under the communication/correspondence window.

Without a word the woman grabbed the envelope, shoving it into her hoodie pocket, and raced out of the bank, running into people along the way.

Ashley still stood at her window, hanging on to the counter there like it was the only thing keeping her up. Some minutes passed and after the third try at trying to get her to speak, a customer motioned to one of her co-workers.

"Ashley?" Monique, another teller, asked. "Ashley, what's wrong?"

The customer peered at the girl, looking over Monique's shoulder. "I think she's broken."

At long last she blinked, exhaling very slowly.

"We were robbed," she whispered, very quietly before the room spun wickedly, fading into blackness.

* * *

When she finally came to she gave her statements – to her supervisor, to the police, to her mom. But when it all was said and done the video surveillance had only caught the woman's back, the money was not marked and was not sequential, and her mom (bless her heart) could not 'karate chop the bitch that pulled a gun on her baby'.

So, she went home, more than ready to relax the mess that was today away. Send it down the drain just like the rest of the day's grime.

She'd just made it to her door and tiredly wrenched it open but was pushed in the rest of the way, nearly hitting her hardwood floors with the force of it.

"What the –" she bit out, spinning around quickly. "Oh God. Not again."

Ashley scrambled behind her couch, quickly searching her darkened apartment, looking around for a weapon.

The blonde woman held her hands out. "I'm not going to hurt you."

Ashley sucked her teeth, disbelievingly. "Yeah right, you psycho. Get out of my house! Help!"

The woman made a run at her and Ashley held up…something, threateningly swinging it around. "Don't come closer or I'll…I'll…"

"Lubricate me to death?" the blonde deadpanned, giving Ashley a dry look.

Ashley looked down at what she grabbed for protection and, yeah KY warming lube…really?

"Get out of my house," she stated slowly, blindly reaching for a phone.

"No."

"No?"

"I want to apologize," the woman said and Ashley literally barked a laugh – short and loud.

"Are you fucking kidding me? You hold me up at my workplace, which, by the way, may result in me getting _fired._ You force your way into my home and now you're here to _apologize_?"

The blonde shrugged. "Yeah."

Ashley launched the lubricant.

"Hey!" the blonde avoided that one, but didn't notice the throw pillow and it bounced off her head comically. "Ow."

Ashley kept up with the pillows, throwing all but one and then using the last one to whack the woman repeatedly.

The blonde ducked, trying to talk but only getting out one word at a time. "Quit."

Whack.

"Stop."

Whack.

"Hey."

Whack. Whack. Whack.

Finally, the blonde managed to reach up a hand, grabbing the pillow mid-motion and yanking hard, pulling Ashley and her momentum directly into her body.

They both went tumbling to the apartment floor, the blonde somehow landing on top of Ashley.

Surprised, Ashley took a moment before she started struggling, wriggling underneath the other woman but the blonde held her down steadfast. "I'm giving the money back."

"HEL– what?"

"I'm giving it back," the blonde restated, looking down at her. "I…I shouldn't keep it."

"No shit Sherlock."

"You're pretty mouthy considering I threatened you with gun violence earlier."

Ashley looked up at her, narrowing her eyes. "Please. If you were gonna hurt me you would have done so by now. Plus, I could take you."

"You think so, huh?" the blonde asked, holding down the other woman's wrists.

"Pretty sure," Ashley grunted out, lifting her head quickly and head-butting the blonde.

"Ow!" they both yelled, the blonde rolling over clutching her head and Ashley scrambled to her feet, grabbing her phone. "I'm so calling the police."

"Wait, please don't," the blonde begged, still sitting on the floor and now clutching her forehead.

She looked so pathetic that Ashley hesitated. "Why not? Give me one reason."

The blonde sighed, her whole body sagging. Then…

"I stole it for my brother. He's dying and he needs this treatment and we're all we've got and I have a crap job with no health care. So, I needed the money to pay for the treatments," she paused, looking up at Ashley whose gaze was still hardened. "Look, I was really hard up for cash and I just didn't know what else to do. I mean, he's my brother…he's all I have left. I can't just let him die."

Ashley bit her lip, weighing this information over and over in her mind.

It was sad really and she really didn't know what she'd do given the same situation. Sure Kyla annoyed the hell out of her sometimes but if it came down to it, she might rob a bank to keep her alive.

But seriously, this woman could still be lying to her and hey –

"How'd you even know where I lived?"

"I followed you home from the bank," the blonde answered simply.

Duh.

"So you're a stalker too? I thought you were supposed to be giving me reasons not to call the police."

"Call them if you want," Spencer bravely told her, shrugging. "I'd just leave the money and go."

Ashley eyed her one more time, still wary. But, something inside of her told her the woman was being serious, very serious. And maybe it's because of this that Ashley hesitated and perhaps started what some would easily consider the worst mistake of her young life but she would never see it that way, regardless of what anyone told her. "No."

"No?"

"No," Ashley stated again simply, placing the phone back down. "I'm not calling the police and you're not keeping that money but we are gonna figure out how to help your brother and you're gonna stop all this bank-robbing business."

Now it was Spencer's turn to look perplexed. "I am…I mean, we are?"

"Yes," Ashley sat down on her sofa and patted the space next to her. "We are."

* * *

Six hours, forty-two minutes, and fifteen, sixteen, seventeen seconds later Ashley was wide awake, still talking to her robber/home invader and if she really thought about it she would consider herself a moron for ever being afraid of this woman.

"I literally have no skills what so ever. Unless you consider stretching five dollars into a meal for two on a consistent basis a skill." The blonde rolled her eyes, wiping at them wearily. She was tired – bone-tired – but every time she closed her eyes, every time she even thought about sleeping the waking nightmare she was living would engulf her in her dreams and leave her completely hopeless.

No.

She couldn't, wouldn't, sleep.

"You have to have something you're good at," Ashley prompted, leaning on her hand. She was growing tired too but still, the other woman kept her captivated enough that sleep stayed at bay. Oh, and yes, she was still being home invaded.

"Well…" Spencer started, looking anxious. "There is this one thing –"

"And you can't say robbing banks because you kind of suck at that."

"I wasn't going to say that," Spencer says, rolling her eyes. But just as she was about to speak again there was a raucous knock on her door.

"Miss Davies?" a male voice called out. "Miss Davies, it's the police! Open the door!"

Ashley and Spencer looked at each other, both alarmed but for different reasons assuredly.

Spencer gave Ashley the most pleading look she could muster and Ashley nodded toward her bedroom, silently telling the other woman to hide.

Spencer dashed off as Ashley slowly walked to her entry door just as another series of knocks sounded.

"Miss Davies, open up," the man called out again.

Ashley drew back the deadbolt and swung open the door, revealing a man about two feet taller than her with a strong chiseled draw and overly oiled hair. He tucked his gun back into his holster finding her unharmed. "Hello, Miss Davies," he said, disarming her with a smile. He reached his hand into his front pocket, pulling out his credentials. "I'm Detective Dennison and I'm investigating the robbery at the bank that occurred this afternoon. May I come in?"

"Isn't it a little late for house calls Detective?"

"I'm a little unorthodox, Miss," he said smoothly, tucking his badge back away. "Besides, we need to get a quick jump on this thing before the perp skips town."

"Well, by all means, come on in," she said, feeling her heart beat a mile a minute.

"I bet it was really scary," the man said, slowly walking into her dimly lit apartment. "What happened to you earlier?"

"It was," she said, running her hand through her hair as he slowly walked around the room. He paused at a few pictures and then took in the out of place throw pillows. "It's been a _really_ long day to say the least," she said, managing to huff out a little laugh.

"I'll bet," the detective said, brushing a hand over the arm of the sofa. "You know? I'm almost up for promotion."

Ashley's faced mirrored her confusion she was sure because that was as abrupt as ever of a conversation change. "Oh, really?"

"Yep. If I crack this case, I'll probably be a shoo-in. And do you know what I get then?" he asked her, still circling the room.

"No idea."

"A lousy extra buck-fifty an hour. Can you believe that? The lives of thirty other men will depend on the decisions I make and they're only giving me a buck-fifty. I've busted thieves and drug dealers…hell, even prostitutes and they all make more money on a daily basis than I do in a month. And what's the real difference between what we do? We all have high-risk/high-reward jobs. We all put in long hours and it's awfully dangerous to do what we do. Only difference is, well, I'm on the losing side."

Ashley was not getting a good feeling and she gradually started inching her way to the phone, even as Mr. Dennison kept rambling.

"So, that's why I find myself here…tonight. You see, I trailed that little bank thief. I followed her here. I was expecting her to come right back out but since she hasn't I can only assume that you were in on it with her. I have to say, that was pretty ingenious. Working at the bank that whole time, putting on such a display for the investigators. You should get an Oscar or something. Now, though, Ashley Davies…" he trailed off here and put a hand on his gun, pulling it out of its holster. "You have two choices here, and I don't think I need to explain what they are. So, I'm only going to ask this once: where's…the money?"

Ashley felt all of the air leave her lungs. This guy, this detective, thinks she stole the money and he's threatening her and her head is spinning because this is just too much. Way too much.

"I don't have anything," she whispers, because she really couldn't breathe. It wasn't a joke and that was the wrong thing to say to him. He lunged for her, swinging the gun-wielding hand around and knocking it hard against her temple. He pressed the nozzle to her head.

"I'm not going to ask you again," he whispered, finger on the trigger. "I can pull this and then ransack your apartment. Telling me just spares your family the pain of having to identify you through dental records."

But before she can even think another thing, sort through her jumbled thoughts, a loud POP! echoed throughout her living room.

The detective stumbles forward, mouth opening and closing like a fish in a fish bowl. Blood spills out and he reaches for his back, stumbling forward and collapsing to the floor trying to breathe.

Spencer is standing behind him, eyes wide and smoking gun still in her trembling hands.

He's still alive though and he's crawling along the floor toward Ashley, leaving a trail of blood at he goes. Thinking better of it, he re-clutches his gun and that's when Spencer shoots him again, this time near his left shoulder blade and the man jerks and flinches, body convulsing slightly before it finally stills.

Ashley looks at the blonde and Spencer stares right back. "He…he was gonna…"

"Spencer…" Ashley starts, not knowing what she's really going to say. "What did you do?"

"He was gonna…he was trying to say you did it Ashley. He was gonna try to put you in jail," Spencer is saying, but she sounds weak and she's shaking. "He might have killed you."

"Oh God," Ashley mutters out, feeling the bile work its way up the back of her throat. "I think I'm going to be sick."

"No," Spencer says, feeling a somewhat primal instinct take over. "No, okay…okay. We…we just have to think."

"Spencer, no. No. There's no thinking. You killed a man. A cop. This is not okay, okay? We need to call an ambulance. Maybe they can help him," Ashley says, rushing off to find her phone, but Spencer grabs her arm and Ashley flinches at the contact, afraid.

The blonde's gaze softens for a moment but she's deadly serious. "You can't Ashley. You think this guy's the only one who penned you for an accomplice?" she asks her. "He's not. I can assure you. And so, what now? Who's gonna believe that your would be assailant came in to you to turn herself in and then a rogue disgruntled, decorated cop comes in and tries to rob us and gets shot in self-defense? Who'd be crazy enough to believe that?"

"But that's the truth," Ashley implored, feeling the panic set in.

"It doesn't matter what's true or not, it's what you can prove. And right now you _and _I are up shit's creek without a paddle. No, what we have to do is get away from here….and fast," the blonde says, looking around the apartment. "Now…I've still got the money so that should get us pretty far. You pack up some things, only what you can carry and still be quick with."

"I can't believe this is happening," Ashley says, still slowly moving.

"Hey, look," Spencer says, touching her briefly on the arm. "I'm sorry, okay? This is all my fault and I'm really sorry. But…I won't let anything happen to you, okay? I promise."

Ashley nodded, still out of it. "Okay."

* * *

**Two months later…**

"Dr. Vonnegut?"

"Yes, Susan," the doctor says, looking up from his charting.

"We've received payment for Glen Carlin," the nurse said, brining in the transcript.

"That's fantastic. How much medication does it cover?"

"Well, Sir, it appears to be enough to cover the duration of the treatment," Suasan says, walking into the doctor's office with a giant duffle bag.

The doctor looks up at the woman curiously, and then reach over into the duffle bag, pulling out stack after stack of bills.

"What in the…"

"Turned up this morning. Anonymously donated specifically for Glen Carlin."

"Oh my God," the doctor said, looking at the nurse again. "Should we…should we report this?"

"No, the note said to keep it quiet. Just take care of the boy."

* * *

"It's done," the voice told Spencer over the non-registered phone.

Spencer hung up without a word, slipping back on her sunglasses before speed-walking across the street.

She walked down to a small café, sitting at the outside table and touching her eyebrow.

Ashley watched the blonde for the signal and once she saw it she rose from her seat, near the counter and smiled a little.

Spencer rose quickly too, briskly walking to the restaurant's entrance.

"Okay!" Ashley called aloud, letting loose a quick shot before turning her two handguns on the crowd. "Nobody make a move and no one gets hurt! We'll be transacting a little financial seminar today. The goal: fiscal gain…for me. "

"You heard the lady," Spencer said. "Now, empty your pockets into the sack!" she yelled, running the pillowcase quickly around the room as Ashley took the register.

They were in and out in no more than three minutes and were soon speeding away from the scene and into the everyday rush hour traffic, the perfect cover.

"Financial seminar?" Spencer asked, taking off the glasses and putting up her hair as Ashley drove.

"Whatever," Ashley said, rolling her eyes. "You loved it."

"I did. A little too much actually," Spencer said, smiling as she ran a hand up Ashley's thigh. "Make a right here. I think there's a hotel room with our names on it."

"I hope so."


	41. Tune Up

"How's your salad?" Justin asks her, cutting up his chicken.

"It's good," Spencer says, smiling at him.

"You don't like it," he says, looking suitably disappointed and she can't blame him really. "We can order you something else."

"No, Justin," she stops him before he beckons the waiter. "I'm fine. This was good."

"Are you sure?" he asks her, eyes scrutinizing.

"I'm positive," she grins, wishing she could fall a little harder for him.

"Good," he breathes, taking her hand. "You know, I've wanted to get you out with me for the longest time."

And she did know this. She's known this since she stepped foot in the firm – insurance firm that is.

She was running late and he was just getting in and he pulled open the door, not noticing her until the stack of folders she was balancing crashed loudly to the floor.

"_Oh, man, let me help you," he said, already reaching down to grab the folders._

_And she watched him, watched him carefully stack the files and then straighten them out, balancing them on his knee before returning to full height._

_And then she watched him lose all sense of communication._

"_Hi," she said politely, a little cutely too._

_His mouth open and closed once before a weak "Hi" tumbled out._

"_Can I…" she started, gesturing to her folders and he followed her gesture, jump-starting when he realized he still had them._

"_Oh yes, yes. Here," he said, handing them over hurriedly, so much so that she almost dropped them again. "Sorry about that."_

"_It's fine," she dismissed easily, holding her files and standing in front of him. He was blocking the entrance still._

"_Let me," he said, finally breaking out of the stupor again and opening the door. _

"_Thanks," she breathed out, smiling at him as she made her way down the corridor._

_And that interaction was all it took._

Now Spencer was not one for workplace romances – they notoriously never worked out in her opinion – so she resisted his dogged pursuits for the greater part of a year.

And it was very hard to do so.

He was very charming to begin with and one of those rare specimens that was completely unaware of it and unknowingly flirted without even trying to.

Plus, he was what most women would refer to as a ten.

Not too shabby.

But still, their lunch outings in the week became dinner outings, and their dinner outings during the week became weekend dates and then those turned into weekend mornings which pretty much solidified their relationship.

And now, now they were two months into it and he was still doing all the right things, and was still charming and doting and hung the moon by her and she was just there.

"You ready to get out of here?" he asked her, this time successful in flagging down the waiter and Spencer looked at him, got locked on his eyes, trying to feel something.

She really was.

* * *

"Well maybe this isn't where you parked," Justin said, looking up and down the street for the familiar blue car.

Spencer looked around again, recognizing the location. The same tree and book store, the parking meter, the fire hydrant.

Uh oh.

"They wouldn't tow my car away for parking in a restricted parking space, would they?" she asked Justin, grabbing his arm.

"They might," he said, looking at her sympathetically. "This is New York."

"Crap."

* * *

He dropped her off at the impound lot, having to rush back to the office for some major mix-up with paper work but not before leaving instructions to call him if she needed anything.

Now though, she really needed some Advil because this place was giving her a major headache. It smelled like a car mechanic's and she'd never liked the smell of gasoline, oil, or sweat.

Plus, the owner was a heavy smoker, something he made abundantly clear with every word he spoke.

"Like I said, Miss. I have to go through all the papers and then I'll let you know how much it's gonna cost to get your car outta the lot. You ain't the only one in New York's who's car's been towed."

"Yes, but I'm the only one here," she implored, looking around the dark, dingy, and, yes, empty lounge. The place was literally deserted sand the only noise was from the broken tube television that played scrambled channels and the coffee maker in the corner that whirred every ten minutes ago as it filled up a pot with the thickest coffee on the planet.

"I dunno what else to tell ya'. So, why don't you just sit down and let me do my job," he gruffed, pulling up his pants. It was a pointless gesture really because there was no way those pants would ever fit around that waistline. They just sat there, just under his beer gut, probably only being held up by gravity. He was big enough to have his own gravitational pull.

Spencer sighed heavily and turned around, marching over to one of the chairs whose plastic covering was cracking and exposing the cheap foam underneath. Throwing herself down in the chair she broke out her cell phone and texted the one person who would empathize with her on this: Justin.

_Sorry babe. Let me finish up here and I'll rush right up there and make everything up to you tonight. Sound good?_

She couldn't help the slow smile that formed and was apparently so wrapped up in her texting that she didn't notice the other person in the room. The one who'd just arrived. The one who was wiping their hands on a soiled rag, trying to get off the grease stains. The one who took one look at Spencer and decided that their day was just looking up.

Speaking of looking up.

"Now there's a sight for sore eyes."

Spencer gasped softly and shot her eyes upward, startled and then eased quite suddenly after. "Excuse me?"

"I was just saying... You smiled just then. And, any person coming home to a sight like that should be mighty grateful. Your husband's a lucky man."

"Um…thank you. But I'm not…" Spencer paused here, wondering why 'gay' was about to trip out of her mouth but she reeled it back in because since when was she so presumptuous to believe that someone was hitting on her - a woman no less. "…married."

"You're kidding?" the woman said, smile of her own turning a little more amused. "Never would have figured," she continued, still wiping at her hands. "You're so pretty and all."

Spencer smiled tightly, letting the words soak in. But, without her knowing it, she gave the woman the once over. She obviously worked here. The jumper and work boots she wore a clear indicator. The suit hung low on the woman's hips, the arms tied around her waist like a makeshift belt. She wore a white tank top that hugged her frame tightly and there were oil smudges in her tanned, lean arms. Her hair was pulled back into a tight pony tail, but the natural curls spilled out of the band, running down to the nape of the woman's neck. Spencer's eyes tripped over her face then and that's when she realized, quite unexpectedly that she was checking the woman out. "Thanks," Spencer said, looking away from the mirth she'd read in those eyes. "Do you work here?" she asked, desperate for a topic change.

The woman smirked. "Occasionally, yes. Although I consider it more like play than work." She raised her eyebrow at the Spencer's blush. "Like now, this is fun."

Spencer didn't follow and was second-guessing her initial assessment that this woman was not flirting with her. She was. She definitely was. "Well, I don't think it's fun. I'm stuck here for an innumerable amount of hours and I have no idea if my car's even here or not."

"Mind if I keep you company?"

Spencer blinked. "I don't even know your name."

The woman smiles, stepping closer. "That can be easily remedied."

* * *

Spencer laughed aloud, shaking her head and gesturing no with her hands.

This woman, Ashley, was absurd.

"Oh come on," Ashley chided, smiling even as Spencer laughed on. "You can't tell me you've never done it before."

And maybe it's an Ohio thing and maybe it's not but Spencer's fairly certain that she's never eaten things straight out of the grocery store before.

"I_ haven't_."

"Not even one measly grape? Who are you? Mother Theresa?"

Spencer snorts and grabs her stomach, feeling it clench because she's laughing so hard.

Ashley just grins harder.

"Okay, okay. So that's a no, which wow, but okay…have you ever toed the line even a little? I mean, I could not possibly be one-hundred percent correct in my immediate assessment of you."

"Well…" Spencer starts, calming down finally. "What was your immediate assessment?"

"Blunt?"

"As if you'd do it any other way," Spencer says, at ease and being pretty charming herself.

Ashley smiles. "You're right. And my immediate assessment was that you were an uptight, career-driven woman, who finds solace in the routine of working a regular nine-to-five desk job, and has a penchant for designer dress suits. Probably the product of two loving parents on the upper east side who have instilled that the only way to judge someone's worth is how far they've climbed up the economical ladder."

"Well, the career thing is right. The family thing is all wrong and if I didn't know any better I might say you harbor a little resentment for 'my kind'," Spencer says, keeping her eyes on the other woman.

"No. Not resentment, but seriously, come on. Would you even give a guy who looked like me a second glance?" The woman gestured down at herself, her attire.

Spencer looked her over again, wondering if brown eyes and brown hair ever coupled so perfectly together on one specimen before. "Probably not."

Ashley looked hesitant before saying what she said next, but she forged onward anyway, deciding that her forwardness had never failed her before. "What about a woman?"

Spencer noticeably balked, but she didn't immediately react like she thought she would. She thought she would become all flustered and offended and 'How dare she even imply such a thing?'. But, all that happened was that she truly thought about the scenario.

If this woman – Ashley- tried to hit on her would she give her the time of day?

Well…yeah, that's what she was doing.

Slowly, Spencer nodded wondering how they'd gotten so close.

"I think I know where your car is."

* * *

"Oh shit," Spencer groaned out, her eyes rolling to the back of her head.

The backseat of her Honda Civic had never been exposed to such depravity before but she didn't care, especially when Ashley's tongue did that thing again.

She reached down with one hand, tangled her fingers in the loose wavy curls of Ashley's hair, held her close to where she wanted…needed her the most.

The other hand was pressed against her back passenger side window, palm flat against the surface as she tried to remain grounded by any means necessary.

"You're so hot," Ashley breathed, one arm holding Spencer in place, the other up under the woman's blouse, wreaking pleasurable havoc on a breast. "Just sexy and hot," she breathed, diving in again face first into Spencer's sex.

"You're way too good at this," Spencer breathed, chest rising and falling heavily. "Too good. I'm gonna come." 'Again,' he brain added for her.

"C'mon baby," Ashley prodded, working harder, using her fingers to speed up the process. "C'mon."

Spencer squealed this time, body going completely still before she convulsed hard, shuddering against Ashley's mouth.

It was all too much. Just way too much.

Ashley finally let up, kissing the inside of her thighs before lithely sliding up her body.

"You oka-"" The rest of her words were muffled as Spencer brought her down for a kiss.

She'd leave thinking for later.

* * *

**Later…**

"Here are your keys Miss Carlin," Joe, the impound lot owner, said, dropping her car keys back into her hand.

Justin was standing at her side, hand around her waist possessively and Spencer took the keys with a smile that falter just a tiny bit as the side door to the waiting room swung open.

Ashley strode in, sweaty and wiping her clean hands dry. "I took a look at it for you," she told Spencer, eyes lit up. "I think it's the carburetor. I'd, uh, take a look at her if you'd like. Whenever you'd like."

Spencer's smile slowly widened again. "Yeah. She could use another tune up."


	42. My BFF's Wedding

Spencer didn't think she was a bad person.

Okay, so maybe she occasionally on accident neglected to inform the check out girl about her _Big Red_ chewing gum in the back corner of the cart.

Blame her non-perfect eyesight.

And maybe she didn't always correct the fast food guy when he gave her more change than she deserved.

Blame hooked on phonics.

And maybe she took more than the allotted one paper at the self-service newspaper dispenser machine.

Blame…well that one was all her.

But she was absolutely certain she didn't deserve this.

"_I know it's short notice and everything but I'd absolutely be forever indebted to you if you could just do this for me._"

Spencer let her head drop to her desk, phone still pressed to her ear.

He was killing her.

Killing her he was.

"Aiden," she groaned, reaching out for the framed picture of them on her desk. It was of a simpler time, the two best friends fresh out of college.

They were right on the brink of the real world and everything else.

Then life threw them both curveballs.

"_Please Spence?_" he asked in his most desperate tone.

She really didn't want to give in; didn't think she could.

"Okay," she breathed out, sucking in a breath immediately after. She could feel his smile.

"_Thank you so much Spence. So much. Just watch. You're going to love her._"

Spencer seriously doubted that.

You see, Spencer Carlin was a woman who was deeply and madly and truly in love with her best friend since ever, Aiden Dennison.

And at one point in time these feelings of hers were reciprocated. It was senior year of college and she and Aiden were as inseparable as two people who weren't Siamese twins could be.

They'd both already secured positions on the east coast after school and she was certain they were on the quick path to wedding bells.

In fact…

_She was just dozing off on the sofa when Aiden came into the apartment they shared, a bouquet of orchids in hand._

"_Hey Spence," he whispered, kneeling by her side._

_She smiled widely, letting her eyes flutter open. "Hey you," she answered, reaching out a hand to touch a flower petal. "Are those for me?"_

"_No they're for this other cute girl I know. Total hottie, you know?" he joked and she pushed lightly at his shoulder with a chuckle._

"_Jerk," she said, letting her hand linger there before fixing his shirt collar._

_Aiden watched her for a moment, just staring and Spencer brought her eyes up to catch his._

"_What?" she asked, feeling shy under his intense gaze._

"_Can you do me a favor?"_

"_Anything."_

"_Marry me?"_

Okay. Almost anything.

Spencer would've readily jumped at the opportunity but Aiden's marriage proposal was followed up with an announcement that he wasn't going to take that job offer on the east coast after all. Well, at least not on the American east coast.

"_China?"_

"_They're going to be paying me six figures out of the gate."_

"_Like…China, China? Like, where Chinese food comes from?"_

_Aiden smiled at that. "You can come with me."_

_Hold the phone._

"_But what about my job? My career?"_

"_I'm sure you can find something comparable over there. And if not, I'll be making enough to support the both of us," Aiden said, holding her hands._

_But Spencer pulled away, needing more than a minute to think._

"_It's not about money, Aiden. This job, this position…it's what I've wanted to do my whole life. You expect me to give that all up to be with you?"_

He did.

She didn't.

And that's why she was here, finding herself in the impossible predicament of planning her best friend's wedding. A best friend she was still in love with. A best friend whose fiancée she has never met but whose shower she was just now being told she had to throw.

Oh the things we do for love.

***o*O*o***

"So when are you finally going to meet her?" Madison, her assistant, asked her.

"We're supposed to have dinner tonight so I guess tonight."

"What are you wearing?"

Spencer gave her a withering look. "Madison, I am trying to figure out how I'm going to stand being in close quarters with them without drinking myself to death or vomiting on sight. I have dedicated no thought processes – absolutely zero – to my attire tonight."

"Now, you see. _That's_ your problem."

"Excuse me?"

"Listen girl," the Latina said, sitting down and pulling Spencer's office chair closer to her. "If you feel for this guy as much as you say, you shouldn't give up so easily. Let him know what he's missing out on with you."

"But he's engaged Madison."

"Engaged, not married."

Good point.

***o*O*o***

It took two hours to find the right dress and then another hour and forty-five minutes to get her ready but now she was dressed to the nines in a black off-the-shoulder, knee-length dress with four-inch strappy stilettos. Her hair was pinned up in the front only to cascade down the back of her neck in loose golden ringlets. And she was now fifteen minutes late.

Fashionably.

Aiden spotted her first, standing to wave her over and she thought he looked great in his grey suit. In fact, she almost swooned but remembered she was too pissed at him to do any of that.

She slowly made her way over to their table, polite smile firmly intact. She could see the back of the woman's head and was surprised to find auburn hair. Aiden had always had a thing for blondes.

"Here she is," Aiden said, wrapping Spencer up in an embrace before she could get a look at the woman. Spencer let her eyes drift close and held him in the familiar yet long overdue embrace.

All too soon he was pulling away and turning her slightly. She heard the chair move back and heard his introduction but all of the sounds were coming through as if they were moving through a vacuum because this woman was stunning.

How was she going to compete with _that_?

"It's so nice to finally meet you Spencer," the woman was saying, her hand extended out.

Spencer looked at it for a long moment before remembering that she was supposed to take it. She reached out to shake it and then hastily drew it back.

"Ow," she and the woman said at the same time, Spencer smiling at the fact.

"Wow, that was an electric introduction," Aiden joked, pulling out Spencer's chair for her.

Spencer chuckled, rolling her eyes as she took her seat. "Lame, Aiden."

"Whatever. You love it," he said, settling back at the table.

Spencer settled in and caught the woman looking at her. And then she slightly panicked when she realized she still didn't know her name.

"I'm sorry," the woman said, mistaking her look for discomfort. "You're just…really pretty."

Aiden chuckled and outright laughed when Spencer blushed. "Way to go, Ashley. I haven't seen that girl blush since third grade."

***o*O*o***

Spencer was running late…again.

This time for her meeting with Ashley, Ashley Davies. Soon to be Ashley Dennison.

"Sorry," she breathed, collapsing into the chair at the table. "My toaster decided to explode today."

Ashley snorted a little laugh and barely kept her water in her mouth. "It's fine. You gave me enough time to sort through my emails. My mother can't believe I'm marrying a _man_ I've known for a little over a month. My sister's pissed I won't let her choose her maid of honor's dress color, or rather, that I won't let her choose green. And I have a multitude of emails from former associates that feel slighted because they didn't receive invites even though I haven't spoken to them in years."

Spencer found her smile widening with each word spoken.

"Sounds like you have your hands full."

"Well yeah. I mean, it's just wicked short notice but Aiden didn't see the point of a long engagement so…"

"Yeah," Spencer said, feeling an awkwardness settle in.

Ashley stuffed suddenly, leaning forward conspiratorially and beckoning for Spencer to do the same. "Can I tell you something?"

"Sure," Spencer answered, leaning up.

"I thought, before I met you and Aiden was telling me about you, I thought for sure I'd dislike you. But…you're just…It's just not like that, you know?"

And Spencer did know. Because she'd thought she'd hate Ashley too. But that hasn't been the case. Since that first literally electric interaction, Ashley's done nothing but be funny and brilliant and – even though she was a woman – remarkably charming.

And she's spent a lot of time with her too because this wedding was going to be one for the ages.

"So I'm planning your bridal shower," Spencer said, eating a bite of her salad.

"Yes," Ashley said, eyes flashing. "And how's that coming along?"

"Oh, you're not getting any details out of me."

Ashley smiled ruefully, averting her eyes briefly. "Of course not. I thought at first I wouldn't enjoy a party put together for me – last minute I might add – by someone who barely knows me. But it doesn't feel like that with you."

"It doesn't?" Spencer asked, feeling all the amusement fall from her face.

Ashley shook her head. "It sounds crazy," she started, raising her shoulders in thought and then dropping them. "But you're like my best friend."

***o*O*o***

"Woooo!"

Spencer giggled and pulled the still yelling Ashley down back through the limousine's roof.

They all were sufficiently hammered.

The night started out with a private party at Beefcakes; the details there will forever remained buried but that night reveled the fact that Madison was very…flexible.

Now though, Madison, Kyla, Spencer, and Ashley had consumed more liquor than should be humanly possible and they were flying around New York's nightlife like it was their last night here on earth.

Ashley crashed back down to her seat, instantly falling into Spencer and they both slumped sideways in the limo cab, still laughing.

"I can't believe I'm getting married in three days."

"I can't believe you're marrying a guy," Kyla said, laughing when Ashley attempted to smack her but instead got Madison's butt.

It's okay. It happens.

"Shut up Kyla."

"Yeah. Shut up, Kyla," Spencer backed up her new BFF. But wait, "What?"

Ashley finally righted herself and attempted to explain. "She's just talking about this little phase I went through."

"I wouldn't call eighth grade through college a little phase, Ash."

"Oh. Then what would you call it?"

"A sexuality. Homosexuality to be exact," Kyla answered with a smirk and a surprisingly accurate and sharp wit considering how drunk off her ass she was.

"Hold on." Spencer was having a tough time wrapping her head around this. "What are you saying?"

"She's _saying_…" Ashley started, cutting her sister off before she could start and glaring at her. "…that I'm gay. But I'm not. I'm bisexual."

"As in you like guys…and girls?"

"No, as in 'What I mean by sexual is that I like sex, with girls, a lot,'" Kyla answered for her.

"Kyla stop."

"I'm just saying, I'd finally gotten cool with this whole gay thing and had just gotten into Ellen and The L Word and then you spring this guy on us and you're gonna go make babies and shit," Kyla defended her position. "I'm still reeling is all."

Spencer just sat there dumbfounded.

Here she had in her hands exactly the type of information she needed to sabotage this wedding and get this Ashley chick out of the picture.

This was the plan all along after all and from the smirk and raised eyebrow Madison was sending her way she could tell the Latina was thinking the same thing.

But things were complicated now. She liked Ashley, a lot, and Aiden was still her closest friend. Did she really want to do him like that? Did she want to do either of them like that?

After dropping Madison off at her place and making sure Kyla made it into her actual hotel room, Spencer hopped back in the limousine cab. Ashley had curled up onto the seat beside her and Spencer decided she wouldn't subject Aiden to shitfaced Ashley.

Soon enough they pulled up outside of her place and a sobering Spencer half-carried/half-dragged Ashley up to her apartment.

Ashley literally mewled when Spencer put her on the bed.

Spencer sat down beside her and just thought…and thought and thought and thought.

But then Ashley turned into her some more and she couldn't think.

"Spencer, where are we?"

"We're at my house," Spencer answered, kicking off her shoes and sitting up against the headboard and Ashley laid her head in her lap.

"Is this your bed?"

"Mmm hmm."

"Your bed is soft," Ashley whispered, tugging on Spencer's thigh – her pillow. "You're soft," Ashley softly stated, snuggling further into Spencer's lap.

Spencer let her head fall back to her headboard as she stared at the ceiling. Her hand gradually wove its way into Ashley's tresses and she felt like her brain was flip-flopping with query.

She knew that revealing Ashley's past to Aiden would be wrong for two very crucial reasons. The first was that she didn't directly want to hurt Aiden. He'd never been anything but the best to her and he didn't deserve that. And second, she didn't want to betray Ashley's trust. She couldn't really explain it but in a short expanse of time the brunette had become something to the blonde that Aiden never was. She couldn't quite put her finger on what it was but she was starting to feel a connection with this woman that she'd never had with anyone before.

And it scared her as much as it exhilarated her because what did this mean?

Eventually, the comfort of her bed, the warmth of Ashley's body heat, and the residual effects of the alcohol in her system shut down Spencer's think machine and she floated off to sleep, dreaming of nothing at all.

***o*O*o***

Spencer awoke very slowly, her eyes barely squinting open.

The window curtains were pulled apart (she'd neglected to draw them last night) and the early morning light was cascading across her bedroom.

There was a dull throbbing between her eyebrows.

But neither of these things registered before Spencer realized that Ashley was lying next to her, turned on her side with one arm propping up her head.

Only when Spencer looked at her did Ashley stop tracing her eyebrows with her fingertips.

"You okay?" Ashley asked with a slight wince. Spencer even looked like her head hurt.

"Yeah," Spencer stated quietly. "I'm good. I must look like shit though."

"Nonsense. You look beautiful."

Spencer snorted. "You're full of shit."

And Ashley smiled a little before letting her fingertips roam again. "No. You do," she whispered, trailing her fingertips along Spencer's eyebrows, her nose, her cheeks, and then finally her jaw line. "You really do."

Ashley shifted and Spencer moved back into the pillows some, knowing but also not knowing what Ashley was about to do.

"It's okay," Ashley whispered quickly before dropping her lips to Spencer's, fingers still on her chin.

Spencer felt her lips touch the softness of Ashley's and couldn't help sighing a little. Because this is what it was, this is what had been troubling her but everything just shifted right into place and when Ashley's tongue touched her bottom lip, the little hum that made its way from the back of her throat was all the confirmation she needed.

***o*O*o***

"So what're we going to do?"

At some point the two women pulled apart, slowing their heated embrace into something more gentle which was somehow more intimate.

Ashley just shook her head, leaning back into Spencer. "I can't marry Aiden."

Spencer pressed a kiss into her hair. "I wasn't looking for this," she said, tightening her arms around the other woman's.

Ashley brought one of her hands up and kissed her knuckles. "Me either. I thought I loved him. I truly did. But now I know."

"You know what?"

"I love you."

***o*O*o***

_Dearest Aiden,_

_As I am writing this letter to you I'm conflicted because you are a friend – my best friend. But I can't deny my heart and I wasn't looking for it but I found love. And I'm going to pursue it. It might hurt you and for that I apologize. But I can't be sorry for wanting to be happy and I only hope that in time your heart will learn to forgive me. Forgive us._

_Love Always,_

_Spencer and Ashley._

Aiden read the letter three times and was still confused by it, not knowing what to make of Spencer's words or of Ashley's signature.

He picked up the white envelope he'd found on his nightstand and turned it over, the pieces falling in place as Ashley's engagement ring tumbled out and rolled to a stop on his coffee table.


	43. Having My Baby

"Spencer? Spencer what are you doing now?"

Spencer stood up from the oven, a pan full of freshly baked muffins in her hands.

Cynthia skidded to a stop in the kitchen, her heels sliding slightly on the tiled floor. "Are you kidding me?"

Spencer looked down guiltily, placing the tray on a cooling rack…next to the _five other pans_.

"No, no, no, no, no," Cynthia says, shaking her head. "Please tell me this is a joke. What happened now?"

Spencer hunched her shoulders up, taking off the oven mitts.

"I dunno. We…didn't work, I guess."

"Spencer, this is the third guy in as many months. I just don't understand it anymore. You're nice and cute and you're smart. It's like the perfect trifecta."

Spencer bristled. "Well, Cyn, it's not like I know either. If I did, I'd avoid getting dumped."

"I'm sorry," Cynthia softened, wrapping an arm around her friend and gradually running it up and down her arm. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Spencer nodded, pouting slightly. "I don't really know when it went wrong. I mean, our date was going fine when…"

"_You're uncharacteristically quiet," Brendan said, taking another sip of his wine. "Bad day at work?"_

"_No, not really," Spencer said, smiling for his benefit._

"_That face you're making doesn't agree with your words. C'mon Spencer," he prodded gently, taking her hand from across the table._

"_It's just…well, Madeline, the lady from work I was telling you about? Remember her?"_

"_Yeah," Brendan nodded, squeezing her hand momentarily. "What about her?"_

"_She's pregnant. She's having a baby," Spencer muttered and almost felt herself starting to get carried away. "And I'm rounding thirty now and I always thought that by thirty I'd be married with kids or at least halfway there but I'm not and it's just…depressing."_

_Brendan blinked slowly, the robotic smile frozen o his face. "I see," he managed to get out, lips barely moving. He turned in his seat, waving a hand in the air. "Waiter!"_

"Okay, now the departure was somewhat asshole-ic but Spencer, you cannot go around telling men that you're ready to settle down on the what? Third date. Get real. He's probably trying to figure out how he can delete his phone number from your phone from a distance."

"Is it so wrong to know what I want out of life? I mean, I'm just putting it out there that I'm done with the trying it out thing. I want someone who's gonna stick," Spencer said, turning back to her muffins.

"Men don't stick, Spencer," Cynthia told her, grabbing a muffin off the pan and picking a little bit off of the top. Banana nut. "They don't stick. You've got to catch 'em. Like a Venus Fly Trap."

Spencer stopped meddling enough to look at the other woman. "Are you serious right now?"

But Cynthia was in the zone, absently chewing on the bread while going through her analogy. "Just sit there, dormant, looking all pretty. And just when they think it's safe to land – when they're comfortable. WHAM!" Cynthia took a rather viscous bite out of her muffin. "Husband."

Spencer looked at her warily. "That's…disturbing."

Cynthia shrugged, holding up her muffin and at the same time displaying her wedding ring. "Worked for me."

* * *

But Spencer, she's not that kind of girl.

She doesn't want to be the girl who 'traps' a man – a husband.

She's the girl who believes in fairytales. And in her fairy tale her handsome prince rides up on a dazzling steed, all smiles and spouting romantic lines from Lord Byron and Keats.

And she'd fall…_hard_, and they'll get married and have babies and live happily ever after and…and…

Well, that's kinda where the fantasy cuts off but still, she's not a Venus Fly Trap or whatever. She's in love and she just wants that person to love her back for who she is…all of her. That's the fairy tale.

But… she's rounding thirty and not getting any younger and maybe she should give this whole Fly Trap thing a go.

Spencer picks up a Red Delicious from the pile and tosses it into the stay fresh bag before dropping it unceremoniously into her cart.

The new mother to the right of her snuggles closer to the baby she has wrapped in her arms.

Spencer smiles warmly and moves on, pushing the buggy to the dairy section.

"Mamma, Mamma," a little boy squawks, tugging on the pants leg of another woman. The woman looks down at him, nodding once and he raises his little fist in the air with a 'yes!' because he's getting the 'cool yogurt.'

Again, Spencer smiles.

It isn't until she passes the expectant mother that she connects the dots.

* * *

"_You want to what?"_

Spencer looks around her cubicle, worried that someone else might have heard the outburst.

Because even with the volume on its lowest level, Cynthia still managed to rattle her eardrum.

"Can you please refrain from trying to handicap me? Even though I'm switching gears that does not mean I don't plan on still getting married one day. And, no offense to the non-hearing community, but I don't think me squeak-speaking would be very attractive."

"_Okay. Okay. Now, say that one more time. And slower…maybe I'm hearing things."_

Spencer rolled her eyes. "I want to have a baby."

"_What?"_

"Cyn-"

"_No. No. Absolutely not. _Spencer_, this is the exact opposite of what I meant when I said, give it some time. This is like, _so_ not giving it some time. I can't even come up with words for how crazy this is."_

"Cyn-"

"_And good luck finding a guy with the kid hanging off your tits. I mean, I'm straight as an arrow but leaky boobs as got to be a turn-off. And stretch marks (gasp), stretch _vagina_."_

"Now, you are being ridiculous for sure. I'm just…Cynthia I'm getting older and my biological clock is ticking and I need to do this, okay? I'm in a pretty decent place financially, and yeah, I get that maybe this isn't how I saw things working out but there's nothing wrong with a little of the unconventional and I'm ready to love someone."

There was a long pause, then: _"So…just to clarify, you decided you wanted to be fruitful and multiply in the fruit_ _section?"_

Spencer groaned.

"_I'm kidding…kidding. You know you're my best friend in the world and if doing this will make you happy…"_

"It will, Cyn. I know it will."

"_Well, let's go make a withdrawal from the jank bank."_

More eloquent words were never spoken.

* * *

"5'11", blonde hair, brown eyes. He's a teacher, does BMX in his spare time, adores his ten month old son and thinks he looks like Keanu Reeves," Cynthia reads the profile aloud and wrinkles her nose at the last line in frustration. "What is it with these guys? That is the third Keanu Reeves look-alike and the way they say it like that's something to be proud of. Looking like an overgrown hobbit is not an accomplishment. Plus, _hello_, that guy looks like he's got nothing going on behind the blinkers. Like, thought wave zero."

Spencer snickers, biting into her Snickers, still reading over her profile.

"And this one: I'm an actor. You may have seen me as 'Bystander #2' on _Friends_. Like, seriously?"

"That's quite the accomplishment, Cyn," Spencer says, tilting back in her chair.

Cynthia tosses her the fish-eye and Spencer can't hold her serious look. "Just kidding. It is kind of ridiculous and arduous and a whole lot of other adjectives that I don't feel like listing but it's important that we get this right."

"No offense, Spencer, but how can we get this wrong? Mother Nature's a sick S.O.B. most of the time. How else can you explain two rocket scientist's giving birth to 'The Situation'?"

"His parents are rocket scientists?"

"I'm just _saying_ Spencer. You could pick out the perfect guy on paper and still give birth to a happy, healthy moron. Look at Glen."

"_Hey_."

"You know I'm right."

"Maybe…"

"Just keep looking."

* * *

She settles for donor #3261149.

It was either him of donor #5446642.

A toss-up really because the decision came down to right-handedness versus left-handedness. And honestly, who really cares?

Although…come to think of it, she remembers sitting next to a left-handed boy in grade school and they always had elbow issues because of the lack of desk space.

She's inwardly still having the debate when the doctor comes into the room.

A different doctor.

"Um…"Spencer starts, slightly narrowing her eyes.

So, it's kind of weird. Here she is: as close to naked as possible, her feet in stirrups, a vial of sperm sitting on a table by her side and in comes this woman, this stranger wearing wire frames and holding a clip board and looking – for lack of a better term – sterile. It's, like, uncomfortable.

"You're not Doctor Ryan," she stutters out, sitting up a little straighter. Or attempting to. Feet in stirrups, remember?

The doctor smiles. "No, I'm not. What gave me away? My eyes? My smile?"

"The lack of facial hair tipped me off, actually."

"Ah…" the woman says, feigning acknowledgment. She breaks into a smile, extending her hand. "I'm Dr. Davies. Ashley Davies. Rex had a family emergency to tend to so I've been trusted to take over his workload."

Spencer absently shakes the woman's hand. "Rex? That gorgeous man's name is Rex?"

"Sexy Rexy," Dr. Davies deadpans and Spencer smiles in reflex. "So…" the woman looks down at her clipboard. "…Spencer, what can I do you for today?"

"I'm…I'm, uh…doesn't it say…" Spencer splutters and would like nothing better but to duck into her gown to hide the redness covering her cheeks. She nods at the clipboard.

"Yes, it does," Dr. Davies smiles again, placing the clipboard into the plastic shelf sitting on a desk nearby. "That's just a little GYNE humor."

"Oh, I get it. You mean like that joke about that famous heart specialist doctor who died and everyone went to his funeral. And they had this huge heart on display behind the coffin. And when the minister finished the sermon and everyone said their good-byes, they opened the heart, rolled the coffin inside and then closed the heart. Then, right after the heart was closed one of the mourners started laughing and the guy next to him was like, 'Why are you laughing?' And the man said, 'I was just thinking about my own funeral.' And the guy, the confused guy, was like, 'What's so funny about that?' And the man said, 'I'm a gynecologist.'" Spencer finished her story slowly, only just realizing how weird that all was and now Dr. Davies was looking at her like Sarah Palin when Katie Couric asked her what she liked to read (because really, who's gonna _ever_ forget _that_?).

Then just as quickly, the doctor barks out a laugh, body jerking forward with the force of it. "Ha!" she laughs, clapping her hands once. "That's a good one. I'm gonna have to remember that one."

"Yeah, well…" Spencer murmurs, tucking a runaway strand of hair behind her ear. She felt off-kilter and, for perhaps maybe the first time in her life, it wasn't really a bad thing.

"Okay, then. Let's get started," Dr. Davies said, walking over to the sink in the corner of the small room and washing her hands. She tugs on some sterile gloves and walks on over to the little table next to Spencer. "Now, I know you've gone over everything with Dr. Ryan but, just in case, you know how this works, right?"

Spencer nodded, eyes flashing over some of the instruments. "I just have to sit back and relax, right?"

"Exactly," Dr. Davies smiles at her, uncapping the vial of donor #3261149.

Spencer really needs to forget that number or either play it in the lottery.

* * *

"Is it done?" Cynthia asks, eyeing Spencer's legs like she'll somehow know by looking there.

Spencer rolls her eyes and grabs her friend, tugging her into her apartment and closing the door behind them.

"The procedure was done, yes."

Cynthia looks at her expectantly. "So?"

"So, I don't know anything yet. I just had it done this afternoon, Cyn."

"Shouldn't you be sitting down or something? I mean, you could dislodge the baby, can't you?"

"Did you ever take sex education?"

"I only paid enough attention to avoid getting pregnant," Cynthia said, following Spencer to the couch. They both sit and Spencer feels her friend's eyes on her.

"What?"

"Something happened."

"Wha – nothing happened."

"Who was he?"

"He who?" Spencer asked, not following.

"This guy. This guy you met. I can tell. Who was he?"

Spencer scrunched up her forehead. "There is no guy. I met no guy today. In fact, no one new has come into my – uh…um, wait–"

Cynthia's eyes flash. "I knew it. What's his name?"

"First of all. There is no he. My regular gynecologist wasn't available to his fill-in preformed the insemination – Dr. Ashley Davies."

"What kind of name is that for a guy?"

"_She's_ a woman, numb nut," Spencer said, tossing a throw pillow at her head.

Cynthia observes her again before settling back against the couch, making a little huffy sound that sounding a lot like "Huh."

Now Spencer was curious. "What was that?"

"What was what?"

"What do you mean , 'what was what?' What was that? That noise you just made."

"I didn't make a noise."

Spencer readied another pillow.

"Okay, alright," Cynthia broke, holding up her hands. "I was just thinking…"

When she didn't continue Spencer raised the pillow again.

"That it's interesting that this Dr. Davies gets this reaction out of you."

Spencer's back to being confused. "What?"

Cynthia smiled patiently, eyes twinkling. "Spencer, you're a carpet-muncher."

"A what?"

"A carpet-muncher. A muff-diver, a finger-forager, a bean-flicker, a sand-gobbler, a clit-clacker–"

"_Excuse me_?"

Cynthia snickered. "About time, I was running out of obscure terminology."

"Are you calling me…are you insinuating that I…"

"Like women?" Cynthia filled in, smiling devilishly before nodding once. "Absolutely."

"Are you crazy?" Spencer asked shrilly, feeling her heart thud with the absurdity of it all.

"No, seriously Spencer, think about it. No one in the world, and I mean _no one_, has had as much bad luck as you have had when it comes to dating. As I've mentioned before, you're not bad to look at and you've got a pretty awesome personality so it doesn't make sense that you're so romantically inept. _Unless_ your subconscious is completely in tune with your sexuality and is being proactive in screwing up your forays with men until you come to your homosexual senses."

"It's no longer a question. You are crazy."

Cynthia raises an eyebrow. "Oh really? What was this doctor's name?"

"Ashley. Ashley Davies," Spencer supplies, still looking at Cynthia and wondering whether or not the woman may have accidentally hit her head on the drive over.

"Yup," Cynthia said, smirking. "Gay."

"I don't follow."

"Spencer, you're smiling."

* * *

So, okay, that shouldn't have been a whole lot to go on but it was because, in all honesty, Spencer didn't even realize it until Cynthia pointed it out.

And then continued to point it out every time Spencer spoke the good doctor's name.

At first Spencer thought it was just because of the incredibly embarrassing story/joke the two women shared and maybe it was an embarrassed grin but the second visit to the office clarified that for her.

"Hello Spencer," Dr. Davies said, poking her head into the room first before walking on in.

Spencer smiled unwittingly and then felt her cheeks warm in response. "Hi Doctor."

"Please, call me Ashley," the other woman said, sitting in the swivel chair closest to Spencer. "So, how are you feeling?"

"I feel fine," Spencer answered, finding her eyes locked onto the brown ones focused on her. She honestly didn't realize she was doing it until Ashley blinked and broke the connection.

"That's good. Well, your blood work came back," Ashley said, grinning conspiratorially. "Congratulations. You're pregnant."

Spencer wasn't entirely sure what she was expecting her reaction to be. Happy? Sure. Elated? Probably.

Bursting out into tears?

Not even on the radar.

Ashley's arms slowly came up and she awkwardly patted the blonde on the back a few times, trying to calm her. "I hope those are happy tears."

Spencer, her own arms wrapped around the other woman's neck, barked out a laugh against the doctor's shoulder. She sniffled a little, pulling back and ducking her head shyly. "I'm sorry."

Ashley grinned, arms sliding down so that her hands rested on Spencer's lower back. "It's okay."

The open door was knocked upon and the two women separated, Spencer's cheeks warming as she nervously tucked fallen hair behind her ear.

"Hi, Dr. Davies," the nurse who'd taken Spencer's vitals walked into the room, smiling nicely but with eyes that spoke of something else. Something that looked a lot like someone trying to hide amusement. "I've got the scripts you asked for."

"Thanks, Clara," Ashley says, taking the small pieces of paper and pushing her glasses up on her nose. Spencer notes two things just then. One, Ashley's glasses did not need readjustment and two, the tips of her ears are firs engine red.

She's blushing!

"No problem, Doctor," Clara said, walking back out of the room. "I'm just gonna close…" the nurse says, pulling the door closed.

Spencer watches Ashley's head drop a little, but the doctor's facing away from her so she doesn't see her face. It almost completely catches Spencer off-guard when the woman's back to facing her.

Ashley takes a deep breath, an embarrassed smile on her face. "Sorry about…"she gestures behind her. "…that."

"It's okay," Spencer finds herself saying before she can think about what the doctor's apologizing for.

Something literally melts off of the doctor and her expression shifts from embarrassed to open, vulnerable even and Spencer's as engrossed as ever.

"This is…I don't ever really do this like…well, ever but, um…would you be interested in maybe going to dinner with me?"

Spencer stops breathing. It's gone unbelievably quiet in the room and her eyes are stuck on the other woman's again. Then the room starts spinning and she realizes that she wasn't exaggerating.

She did stop breathing.

"Spencer?"

The blonde blinks, the air in her lungs whooshing out before she nods slowly, breathing in just as slowly.

"I'd love to."

* * *

Thursday night isn't a typical date night, like, at all.

But Cynthia insisted upon it so that they'd have something interesting to talk about while she was bored out of her mind at work on Friday.

You see, Friday was meeting day for Cynthia which meant major textage under the conference table.

She got there earlier than they'd agreed on. Again, Cynthia's suggestion. She figured if straight women are always bitching about guys being late, than lesbians must stress punctuality.

It made sense at the time, something about uteri, but now she feels plain stupid.

She's still contemplating when a finger taps her on the shoulder and she turns and is floored.

Almost literally but, dear God, thankfully not.

The good doctor looked amazing.

Which, yeah she'd never really gone into it before because the attraction was mostly intellectual but goodness did Ashley look good.

Better than good.

She was wearing a blouse, black, and bearing more than enough cleave. And she was wearing this skirt that hugged her in places and ended just above the knee, and then the legs and whoa, Spencer was checking her out.

Ashley grinned, taking Spencer's wide-eye stare ion record time.

"Hi."

"Hi," Spencer breathed.

"I hope you weren't waiting long."

"Not even," Spencer dismisses easily, clutching her handbag tightly. "I just got here."

Ashley's smile widened. "Good. So," the brunette held out her hand, "Shall we?"

Spencer took her hand, hoping hers wouldn't be too clammy. "Okay."

They'd settled in and placed their orders and started a little small talk about their days and how Spencer was doing.

Little stuff.

Then…

"You look…unbelievable," Ashley said, eyes focused on the blonde.

Spencer's entire face burned up. "Thank you. You too. I mean…wow."

Ashley smiled widely. "Thanks. I don't want to doctor you or anything, but how are you doing? This is usually about the time that the symptoms start kicking in."

Spencer shook her head, not thrown by the change of topic. "I'm good. Nothing's been really off," she said, moving her arms off of the table as their food arrived.

"Here you are ladies," the waitress said, setting Ashley's plate in front of her. The smoke was still wafting off of Spencer's plate when she sat it in front of the blonde. "I hope you find everything to your liking. Just let me know if you need an- Miss, are you okay?"

Spencer swallowed thickly, nodding her head twice quickly and offering up a watery smile. She looked over to see Ashley looking at her, concern etched across her features.

"Spence?"

Spencer doesn't even get to smile at the nickname like she wants to because her stomach lurches violentely and she rushes off to the bathroom as quickly as her sandaled feet can take her.

"It's okay. Let it all out."

* * *

Mortifying.

That is all she could think of to describe this moment.

Here she was on her first date with another woman, a beautiful woman, who genuinely liked her and instead of holding hands and stealing shy glances, she was wrapped around a toilet bowl, retching her insides out.

She felt Ashley's hand holding her hair back and felt the woman's other hand rubbing slow circles on her back.

Spencer heaved one more time but it was a dry one, finally. She'd been entertaining the thought that maybe she'd throw up everything she'd ever eaten in her lifetime.

She pulled her face out of the toilet and sat back against the bathroom stall wall, eyes closed tightly in embarrassment as she used the cloth Ashley'd procured her to wipe her mouth.

"So…a little too soon to rule out the morning sickness, huh?"

Spencer couldn't help but laugh, her stomach protesting at the hitch of breath. It felt like she'd been doing crunches for hours.

She groaned. "Don't make me laugh."

"Sorry." She heard Ashley move to sit next to her, felt the woman's warmth close by. "You don't have to be embarrassed."

Spencer cracked open her eyes, shifting them sideways to regard the woman carefully. "This was a disaster."

"Well, now…" Ashley said, chuckling softly. "That's a little harsh."

"No, not you. It's me…I'm such a…God," she closed her eyes, feeling a self-depreciating rant come on. "First I thought it was guys, but now with you…maybe I'm just romantically broken."

"What are you going on about?"

"I'm not gay," Spencer blurts out, eyes opening suddenly. "At least, I think I'm not. And I've just made a complete idiot out of myself on my first ever date with a woman and now you probably think I'm _such_ a tool for even telling you that and-"

….

…

….

"…okay…"

Spencer blinked open her eyes just a moment after Ashley pulled away.

Uh huh.

She kissed her.

"…um…"

"Yeah, Spencer. I'd really like to see you again. I think you're adorable and attractive and smart and beautiful and funny and please feel free to stop me if you feel like I'm gushing."

"You just kissed me."

"I did," Ashley nodded, brining her hand up to cup her own chin.

"But I just puked." Spencer even cringed a little after that one.

"Yeah. I remember. That's why there was no tongue."

Spencer thought about this for a moment before a smile slowly spread across her face.

"I really need a toothbrush."


	44. Mental

Spencer watched through the observation window, eyes on the brunette rocking back and forth.

The aide carefully opened the door, pushing the padded tray of food inside.

The brunette didn't react to him – at all. That is, not until he said something.

Then, an explosion of sorts.

The tray was upturned, food thrown everywhere and the brunette howled maniacally, eyes nearly slits as she shrieked at him.

The man scurried out hurriedly, barely closing the door before she was crashing against it – hard. Next were the food stuffs, juice and applesauce decorating the single pane of heavy glass in the door.

The brunette slowed momentarily, walking up to the one-way mirror.

She dragged one foot behind her, carrying it as if it were asleep.

Spencer pushed her glasses up, her pen readily poised on her notepad.

The woman took one finger and traced it down the mirror, eyes boring into pane.

She was muttering something that Spencer couldn't quite make out but before she could figure it, the brunette's door swung open again and in walked the orderlies, holding down the woman until the single shot made her compliant again.

* * *

"Good afternoon, Ashley."

The brunette lies prone on her bed, restraints firmly in place, and whether she had heard her or not she didn't give any indication.

Spencer shifted slightly in the straight-backed chair. It was uncomfortable to say the least, but these first meetings were all about building rapport and this is the only tactic left available to her.

"We haven't met before but my name is Spencer Carlin. I'm a psychologist and I'm here to help you."

Again, the brunette did nothing. Her breathing pattern didn't change but she was awake, staring unblinkingly at a spot on the ceiling.

"You don't have to talk to me Ashley but I really wish you would."

No response.

Spencer sighed heavily, capping her pen and putting down her notepad.

She let her eyes roam to the other woman and sat up a little. "Are you uncomfortable?" she asked.

There was a slight hitch in the brunette's breathing but other than that, nothing.

Spencer stretched and shifted again in the hard, unyielding chair. "Because I am. This chair sucks."

The brunette blinked, her head turning a little.

Spencer glanced up when she heard the slight movement and caught the brunette's gaze for a moment before those eyes shifted back to the ceiling.

"What am I asking?" Spencer said softly, shaking her head at her own stupidity. "Of course you're uncomfortable. You can barely move. Here."

Spencer stood suddenly, bringing her hands to the restraints on the woman's wrists and ankles, quickly undoing them.

The brunette's gaze was boring a hole into her but she didn't allow herself a glance in her direction, keeping up the precocious charade. She needed Ashley to trust her, but trust is, after all, a two-way street.

After she was finished, she sat back down in her chair, reaching down to grab her pen and notepad before sitting, startled to find Ashley standing right in front of her.

She swallowed slowly, pushing her long blonde hair back out of her face. "Hi," she said, smiling up brightly at the woman, ignoring her skyrocketing pulse.

The brunette didn't smile, biting her lips in reaction to the words before holding out a pillow. "You can put it in your chair," she said slowly, her voice rough around the edges. Probably from all the yelling, Spencer assessed.

"Thank you," Spencer said, taking the offered pillow and setting it behind her, eyes on the brunette the entire time.

Ashley nodded once but then quickly jumped back onto her bed, settling in the corner with her back pressed against the wall.

And so concluded session number one.

* * *

Spencer was at home, eyes poring over the file again, looking for something she might have missed.

In four sessions with Ashley, the brunette hadn't given her any information of substance. Actually, aside from the first day pillow accident, Ashley's been as close to mute as one could get.

They'd just spend the hour staring at one another, Spencer scrutinizing her patient, studying her movements.

And Ashley just stared back, unblinking.

It was at times like those when Spencer felt as if she were the one being studied.

Frustrating did not begin to cover Spencer's feelings on this case.

She'd been assigned the young woman after numerous failed attempts with other notoriously good psychologists – the best in the field even, people she admired and aspired to be. But Ashley had completely shut down all of them, leaving them baffled as to what it could be that was troubling the woman.

Why she left their world behind.

* * *

The clock on the wall ticked steadily, a constant reminder of the seconds, minutes, _hours_ they were wasting, playing this game.

Spencer sat there, right leg crossed over the left one, eyes boring holes into her subject.

Ashley sat cross-legged on her bed, eyes locked onto Spencer's own. Her hands were folded neatly in her lap and her controlled breathing was almost enough to lull Spencer to sleep.

"That's ten minutes," Spencer suddenly said, eyes still trained, and for the first time, Ashley blinked first.

The woman's brown eyes closed and opened twice before she righted herself and Spencer smiled.

"I think I just won."

Ashley didn't say anything, but the corners of her mouth twitched upward ever so slightly.

* * *

There was another chair in the room with Ashley.

Spencer slowly walked into the room, feeling Ashley's eyes on her the entire time.

She carefully took her pad and pen out of her briefcase and sat the bag down next to her chair, busying herself with seemingly unimportant tasks as she sat down.

Finally, she sat back, regarded Ashley silently for a moment. "Why is there another chair here, Ashley?"

She honestly didn't expect to hear anything in return, so used to their one-sided conversations. And they was nothing unusual that had happened that day to tip her off to the importance of their second particularly meaningful conversation, so her surprise was apparent when Ashley cleared her throat before gesturing to the chair.

"I want to sit with you," the woman said, eyes clear and shining. "May I?"

Spencer, noticeably shaken, nodded once, waving at the chair with a 'by all means' gesture.

Eyes trained on Spencer, the brunette got up from her bed on steady legs and slowly made her way over and sat down in the other chair.

Spencer knew she should write this down, knew that the importance of this interaction _meant_ something, but she didn't or rather she couldn't because she was caught in that staring game with the other woman again.

It was a bit unnerving.

Ashley blinked first again, her hands wringing together anxiously. "I think I want to talk now, Spencer."

* * *

Patient Name: Ashley

D.O.B.: Unknown

Previous Address: Unknown

Next to kin: Unknown

The woman was as close to a Jane Doe as they had ever seen before.

They found her in an alleyway, bruised and battered, cold and shivering against an early January frost. Her hands were purple and red, dried blood under the few nails still there and on her knuckles. She only had a blanket wrapped around her and it too had seen better days.

They took her to the hospital and she fought against them all, not wanting them to touch her. Eventually, they sedated her, and the doctors poked and prodded, making their assessments.

Yes, she was malnourished.

Yes, she had been beaten.

Yes, she had been sexually abused.

In other words, yes, she had been broken.

* * *

"What is your name Ashley?"

Spencer put the notepad down. She didn't want to be distractedly taking notes right now.

Ashley was opening up to her and she didn't want to seem disinterested by doing her job.

Ashley's eyes darted down to her hands, and Spencer noted mentally that they were shaking.

"My name…is Ashley Davies. It's Ashley Davies."

Spencer nodded encouragingly. "That's a fitting last name."

Ashley's head tilted slightly, intrigued. It's one of the first times Spencer had seen anything like that from the other woman. Usually, she was guarded, indifference clouding her features. This look spoke of interest, interest in what Spencer had to say.

"It's Welsh origin. Kind of a relative of the name 'David' which in Hebrew means 'beloved'," Spencer explains, answering the unasked question. "You know what 'beloved' means don't you?"

Ashley nodded, lips twitching again. But Spence caught it, noted the slight warmth coating her cheeks.

"Well, then…" Spencer started, sitting up a little straighter in her chair and clearing her throat. "It's nice to formally meet you, Ashley Davies."

Ashley looked at the woman's hand, taken aback, but she reached out her hand, shaking it twice and not able to fully hold back the smile this time.

"My first smile," Spencer gasped, unable to help herself. "I am delighted."

Ashley snatched her hand back, feeling her cheeks burn, but Spencer's eyes were still on her and she still was smiling.

"What else do you want to tell me Ashley?"

Ashley hugged her arms to herself, not prepared for the shift of emotions or conversation. "I'll tell you everything."

* * *

Everything included the incredibly detailed retelling of a half-year of torture and torment, both physically and emotionally.

Ashley had been abducted by some man – she didn't know his name – and kept in his home for the greater part of a year. He'd hitched a ride with Ashley's alcoholic father and killed the man in lieu of keeping his car and Ashley. The fear that he'd kill her too forced her to go with him.

The knowledge that he knew where her family stayed kept her quiet even after his escape.

* * *

"You don't have to be afraid," Spencer told her, keeping her voice quiet. "He can't hurt you anymore."

They were having another session, because Spencer, for some inane reason, knew when Ashley was lying. Could pick up on it as clearly as her own thought waves, so when Ashley was pressed for information about the man who took her and she couldn't recall, Spencer called her on it.

"Why are you protecting him?"

Ashley's eyes flashed, anger burning through. "I'm not," she hissed out.

Spencer's own eyes turned sharp, a pointed glare that was so directed it almost pierced Ashley's skin. It was inappropriate – this behavior, this technique. She knew that. But she also knew she wanted Ashley safe and she'd gladly throw professional decorum out of the window if that was the end result.

"I know you know who he is," Spencer informed her quietly, voice still in spite of the emotion she felt welling in her chest. "You're safe here and I promise if you tell me this asshole's name he'll never see the light of day again."

Ashley's features softened, the conviction in Spencer's voice was convincing. Still, she knew that this man could do things, harm other people – people close to her. And she couldn't let that happen.

"Was he…Is he related to you?"

She didn't answer, not verbally anyway, but the look she fixed Spencer with was so alarmed, so telling, that Spencer had her answer, in spite of it.

* * *

The paper read _Marshall Davies Found Guilty on All Counts_.

It had been three years and she'd only had to go to the courtroom twice, called on behalf of the prosecution as a witness to Ashley's testimony.

She'd seen her there, sitting with an older woman that bore her resemblance, and two others: a young man and woman, both looking like they wanted to kill the man sitting at the defense table.

Ashley wasn't looking at him though, her eyes were on Spencer's the whole time, and it was a lot like that very first session. The one where Ashley didn't say a word as Spencer unstrapped her restraints but her eyes were speaking then too, only Spencer couldn't really tell what they said.

Now though, she can, and it looks a lot like 'thank you'.

* * *

It wasn't the best part of her job.

In fact, she rather hated it.

You'd get so close to a patient, especially the trying ones. You worked hard to draw them out, gain their trust, build a relationship and it's all so very personal that you can't help but get attached. They take a piece of you with them and every time you leave to start all over again, you're a little bit less of the person you were before, a little different, a little changed.

That went all out of the window when she'd come across Ashley Davies.

When they parted ways, Spencer left a whole lot more than a piece of herself behind.

* * *

It could have been strange but it wasn't.

The first time they'd bumped into each other in a setting that wasn't so professional – because mental asylums and courtrooms weren't exactly casual meeting places – could have been awkward.

Yet, pulling open the door to Starbucks and nearly walking into the patient that put your career on the map didn't seem that way at all to Spencer. In fact, it seemed so ordinary that she merely smiled brightly, standing there for a moment.

"Hey," Ashley said, first to speak for the first time ever.

"Hi," Spencer replied, still in the doorway.

Ashley swept a hand to her face, pushing back the hair that had just gotten blown in the way. "Are you leaving?"

Spencer looked down to her mocha caramel latte, filled to the brim and in its to-go cardboard sleeve. "No."

* * *

"Is this weird?"

Spencer blinked before turning to the other woman, ghost of a smile on her face. "Some people might say that."

"But not you, right?"

"No, Ashley," Spencer smiled, squeezing the hand she still had in her grasp. "Not me."

* * *

"Couldn't you get in trouble for this?"

She's in her kitchen, putting together a last minute platter of snacks for the people unexpectedly at her house. She'd invited Ashley and her siblings, Kyla and Aiden. She'd invited Clay and his fiancée Chelsea. Glen, her oldest brother, invited himself. And her mom and dad were just conveniently stopping by.

"Get in trouble for what?" Spencer asks him, dicing cheese into cubes. She's not sure what he's asking and while there are a lot of people here now, she's pretty sure she's not breaking any fire or safety codes.

"She's your patient, right?"

Spencer turns around to regard him quietly. "Past tense, Glen."

He rolls his eyes, taking her arm and drawing her further into the kitchen, away from the din in the living room. "I'm not talking about that kind of trouble. Let's ignore that point for a second, but, aren't you worried that there's something else afoot? I know I'm not all smart with the brain and how it works and stuff, not like you. But, I do know all too well about the 'Hero complex'. Maybe that's what's going on."

She shakes off his grip, eyes flashing. "It doesn't feel like that, Glen."

He shrugs, eyes casted downward for a moment. "I just don't want you to get hurt."

She's about to speak when Ashley's in the entryway, stopping just shy of coming in. Her eyes light up when she sees Spencer and she raps her knuckles quickly on the wall. "Need a hand?"

Spencer's on face splits in two as Ashley comes over to her, wrapping her up in an embrace from behind that feels to warm to be anything other than real.

Glen doesn't know what he's talking about.

Because this hug? It feels a lot like love.


	45. The Playground

"Go on Spencer. Go Play." Paula waved her little girl off, turning her attention back to the other mothers.

Spencer walked off slowly, clutching the hem of her pretty pleated skirt in her tiny hands.

She wasn't really good with other kids. In fact, quite frankly, they scared her. What with their loudness and messiness and other undesirable things.

Her big brother Glen was like the other kids. He liked mud pies and scabs and spit and bugs.

Well, he was like the other _boys_.

Her big brother Clay was not _as_ obnoxious but he still liked playing with his action figures – banging them together and making them fight.

But Spencer…

Spencer was a fan of pink things and frilly things and tea parties with her dollies and stuffed animals. Things that only spoke when spoken to and were never too loud or dirty.

Her toys were never unpredictable.

So this explains her apparent apprehension when approaching the other girls on the playground – sliding down slides, shrieking while playing tag, pumping ever higher on the swings.

"Hi."

Spencer didn't see the girl approach her so she was startled by the little tyke grinning in front of her, missing quite a few teeth.

"Hi," Spencer murmured softly, always wary of new kids.

"My name is Ashley. What's yours?" The girl, Ashley, smacked loudly on a piece of candy and Spencer could see from here that it was an apple jolly rancher, her favorite.

So maybe she could give this girl a chance.

"My name is Spencer," she told her, still loosely clenching her fingers together.

"But that's a boy's name," Ashley told her, giggling somewhat and Spencer only shrugged, not knowing exactly how to respond to that.

"S'okay," Ashley said, crunching down on her candy. "I like it,"

Spencer smiled her first genuine smile at the girl. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Ashley grinned back, reaching her hand for the other girl's. "Wanna go play?"

"Uh huh," Spencer nodded and off they went.

**

* * *

**

Two weeks, four days, and one hour later…

"Pump your legs. Like this," Ashley told her, demonstrating so the girl could swing higher.

They were trying to touch the sky.

"I can't do it Ashley," the girl grumbled, trying to reach that ever-elusive sky height but every time she'd climb higher, her stomach would flutter and she'd loosen her hold on the chains, losing momentum.

Suddenly Ashley was right in front of her, face still bright but also very serious. Spencer slowed her momentum to a stop, looking warily at the other girl.

"Don't ever say that again."

"What?"

"That you can't do something. You always can. We can. Me n' you. Spencer and Ashley can do anything."

Spencer believed her and the next time they swung – the stars out and the moon shining brightly – it was Ashley who had to keep up with Spencer.

* * *

"Happy Birthday Ashley," the girl whispered.

Okay, so maybe Ashley's little rebellious streak had rubbed off on her because she was sure pre-Ashley-Spencer would never have – at the ripe old age of eight, no less – snuck out of her parents' house and crept across two front lawns and crossed the street just so that she could be sure she was the first one to wish her friend a happy birthday.

"Spencer," Ashley said joyfully, sitting right up in bed and hugging the girl fiercely.

Spencer pulled away first, grabbing the tiny saucer with the lone cupcake on it, a candle sparkling away atop it. "Make a wish."

Ashley looked at the other girl, eye bright. "I don't need one. It already came true."

* * *

"Take it back," Spencer growled, shoving Glen's face into the dirt.

"Spencer!" her mother yelled, streaking across the backyard as quickly as she could. She grabbed her daughter's arm and pulled her off of the boy, quite easily because Spencer only weighed about fifty pounds soaking wet.

Glen spit out a dirt clump and bared his teeth, pushing up from the ground angrily. "I'm gonna mash your face in."

Paula slapped a hand on his shaoulder and held the two children apart, looking from one to the other. "What is going on?"

"Glen's a dummy head," Spencer said, seriously. Her cheeks were as red as cherries and she was still breathing like she was running a marathon.

"I'm not. You're the dummy, dummy," Glen shot back, reaching for her again. He didn't take kindly to being beat up by his _younger_ sister. And what on earth had gotten into her anyway? He was only trying to break down how things like that worked.

"Cut it out," Paula said, voice stern and eyes hardening. "Now, somebody start explaining. Now."

"I only told her she couldn't marry Ashley and then she went all crazy on me."

Paula's eyebrow quirked up. "What?"

"I was telling her how Becky and me were playing house and that she was my wife n' all and then she says that she n' Ashley was playing house and that she was the wife. And I said they couldn't because there was no husband and she said Ashley was the husband and I said that's stupid and then she hit me," Glen said, getting angry all over again.

Paula laughed. No, she outright guffawed at his statement.

"I only hit him 'cause he said that me n' Ashley couldn't get married and I said yes we can and he said two girls can't marry each other. That's not how it works and Ashley always tells me that when somebody tells me I can't do something I should make them eat dirt."

Paula snorted at how literal hee daughter had taken the statement.

"Spencer, sweetie," she said, curbing her amusement for one second. She looked down at he daughter who'd, over the years, gotten a little bit more rambunctuos and rowdy. It was always, for the most part, a very well-contained rowdiness, but standing here, right now, her little girl looked all the part of a menace. She was ready to pounce on Glen at any moment. She turned back to Glen.

"Glen, go in the house and wash up for dinner."

Glen's jaw dropped. "She's not even getting punished."

Incredulous = Glen.

"I'll handle Spencer," she said, turning him loose. "You go inside."

Spencer's eyes stayed on him the whole time, her little heart still beating out of control.

"Spencer."

She winced as she heard her name. She turned her attention back to her mom and was confused to see the very poorly contained amusement there.

"I'm disappointed in you."

"But he said-"

"I know what Glen said," Paula interrupted, trying to keep her words stern. "But you can't go hitting people because you don't like what they say."

Spencer's shoulders dropped. "I know."

Paula looked down at the girl and dropped to a knee, just so that she could be at eye level. "Sometimes, people are going to say things that make you upset, angry, or even sad. And your dad and I…well, we might not always be around to protect you. But, you just remember who you are and who loves you and you'll make it out okay. Alright?"

Spencer nodded. "Mom?"

"Yes, Spencer."

"I don't care what Glen says. I'm going to marry Ashley."

Paula laughed, not taking the words seriously at all. "I'll be waiting for my invite in the mail."

* * *

A whole day went by without Ashley and Spencer was at her wit's end.

The girl, her Best Friend, had gone and gotten herself grounded and that meant miserable…ness for both of them.

No phone.

No hanging out.

No sleepovers.

No nothing.

Spencer _hated_ it.

"Hey dorkus," Glen asked, nosily clamoring by her room. "What are you doing all by your lonesome? Your girlfriend on lockdown?"

"I dunno," she answered snippily. "How's your _boyfriend_?"

Glen's cheeks reddened in anger and she snorted. "That's not funny."

"I thought it was," she said, rolling over to look at him. "Aw, Glen. I kid. Why so serious?"

And because they were those type of siblings, he let it go with the silly comment. "We were all gonna go to the playground later. You wanna go?"

"And watch you and Madison suck face all night? I think I'll pass."

This time Glen turned red for a different reason. "Whatever," he grumbled out, scratching the back of his neck, soothing a non-existent itch. "Ashley'll be there."

Spencer. In.

* * *

"How'd you get out? I know they locked your door and window," Spencer asked her, whispering while they sat inside the tunnel slide.

She was lying on her side, her feet planted on the plastic slippery surface to give her purchase. Ashley laid right next to her, feet prone in a similar position.

The brunette grinned. "I told them Kyla and I were gonna have a sleepover in her room."

Spencer scoffed. "And they fell for that?"

"Yeah. And Kyla's totally covering for me too. Or she'd better be. She took a whole bag of my Jolly Ranchers."

Spencer snickered, bringing her finger up to trace some of the markings on the inside of the slide. For years kids have been coming to this playground, hanging out on this slide and they'd left their histories etched into the walls. Sometimes a 'so-and-so was here', most times just initials. Sometimes there were hearts and the words '4 EVA' and other times just a plus sign.

Ashley cleared her throat, shifting around until she found what she was looking for. Spencer blinked when suddenly a black permanent marker was placed in her line of sight. "Would you do the honors, Miss Carlin?"

Spencer smiled, taking the marker and uncapping it quickly. She found an empty spot right above them and quickly scribbled out her message.

S.C. & A.D.

BFF.

Spencer didn't forget the heart.

* * *

"Ha!"

Spencer looked up from her homework and over to the source of the noise.

Ashley was in her closet she knew and that 'Ha' was more amused than anything else.

"What did you find now?"

To this point, Ashley'd found the letter she wrote Jesus, asking for a new brother. She'd found the cherished but completely destroyed Barbie doll that Glen had decided was his personal mission in life to mame and torture. And she'd also found the list of boys Spencer had a crush on in Kindergarten. A list that included Papa Smurf and Barney so it wasn't like it was embarrassing or anything.

Ashley's head popped out and she came rushing over, a sheet of colored paper flapping in her wildly waving hands. She was still snickering quite a bit when she plopped down next to Spencer.

"Look at this."

She handed Spencer the piece of paper and Spencer automatically felt her cheeks burn. There, before her eyes, in her unmistakable pre-teen scrawl was an invitation to a wedding, hers and Ashley's to be held at the playground, in front of the slide. 'Please bring your own candy' was scrawled neatly at the bottom and that made her laugh out loud.

"Oh my God. How stupid was I?"

"Stupid," Ashley repeated, not agreeing. "I think the word you're looking for is adorable." She playfully pinched Spencer's cheeks, giggling a little as the girl's ears turned red. "Seriously though, this has got to be the cutest thing ever in history."

Spencer groaned and buried her face in a pillow. "Stop it, Ash."

"Okay, okay," Ashley let up, swatting the girl's but playfully. "Stop whining. Can I keep this though?"

Spencer brought her face back out. "Why would you want it?"

Ashley looked away for a moment, biting her lip before shrugging evasively. "Can I have it?"

Spencer shrugged. "Sure."

* * *

"This blows," Spencer said, pulling on the shoulder straps of her training bra.

Ashley snickered, still flipping through the pages of her magazine while lying on the bed. "You're such a guy, Spencer."

"I wish. I'd take facial hair over these things any day," she grumbled, flopping down beside Ashley. "You'd still love me, wouldn't you?"

Ashley grinned at her. "For sure. Even with a goatee."

Spencer snorted as she picked up Snuffy, the snuffleupagus, Ashley's most favorite thing to cuddle. "Anything good in the magazine?"

"Dawson's Creek posters. Want 'em?"

"I don't really like those guys," Spencer said, scrunching up her nose. Dawson sometimes reminded her of her brothers if they shared a body…and personalities. You know, self-absorbed but still sweet enough to not seem like it.

Spencer heard Ashley sigh heavily and then she felt the bed shift and the magazine flutter to the floor.

Soon, the space on the ceiling she was staring at was filled with Ashley's face looking down into her own.

"Can I tell you a secret?" Ashley asked her, her face revealing nothing.

Spencer picked up on the seriousness right away. "What?" she asked, tossing Snuffy aside.

Ashley stared at her hard, her eyes sweeping over Spencer's features and the blonde felt her face heating up.

"What?" she asked again, ducking her chin subconsciously.

Ashley smiled, bringing her hand up and sweeping the hair out of Spencer's eyes, leaving her fingers lingering on her cheek. "There's this person I like," she starts, looking away for a barely discernable moment.

And Spencer grins fully now, finding this humorous because Ashley told her once when they were six that she would never ever fall for anybody after seeing her mom practically choke this guy with her tongue.

She'd never thought that she'd be the first to admit anything like this.

"Who?" Spencer asked, pleased beyond being able to contain it.

Ashley flushes deeply, taking one look at Spencer's amused face and rolls her eyes. "Forget it," she mumbled out, rolling away from the other girl.

"No way," Spencer practically scoffs. "You can't lead off with something like that and then back down. That's just not even cool."

"I don't want you to freak out."

"Why would I freak out?" Spencer asks her, not liking the fact that Ashley won't meet her gaze.

Ashley picks at her bedspread, imaginary lint only she can see. She shrugs.

"Why would I freak out?" Spencer asked, again.

Spencer absently thought for a moment that she was getting sick of asking Ashley questions twice but all her thoughts crashed together when she felt the sudden warmth of lips on hers.

It startled her and for a moment she felt like pulling away, but then the warmth spread and she found her body responding to the kiss before she could even figure out what was really going on.

Ashley pulled back after what probably wasn't more than five, six seconds maximum and Spencer's eyes – which had closed at some point – squinted shut even tighter, not prepared to deal with this moment.

Ashley was still close, she could feel the girl's breath on her cheeks. She felt the bed shift a little and then Ashley's hand was on her face again, tracing her feature, smoothing out the lines in her forehead, the wrinkle on her nose.

"Spencer?" she heard the girl whisper.

Spencer squeaked out a "Hmm?"

"Why do you have your eyes closed?"

"Because."

She could feel the girl's smile. "Because what?"

"Because, I'm scared."

"Don't be, baby."

Spencer's stomach clenched in that unpleasant but not quite way, like right before the dip on a roller coaster.

"Spence, open your eyes."

"I can't."

Spencer felt the bed shift again, and Ashley's sigh scraped at her ears. "What have I told you about that word? There's nothing to be scared of. I'm still me and you're-"

Spencer's eyes blinked open. "I'm still me."

Ashley's smile bloomed wide and large across her face. "That's right. Me and you, Spence. Ashley and Spencer and we can do anything. And right now…" the brunette trailed off, dropping her face lower again. "I really want to kiss you."

So she did.

* * *

"Ashley!"

Spencer whipped her head around, looking everywhere for the other girl. "Ashley, where are you?"

Another clap of thunder and streak of lightening and Spencer had just about had enough. "If you don't come out right now I'm gonna-"

"You're gonna what?" Ashley smoothly asked her, snaking her arms around the blonde's waist from behind.

Spencer shrieked in fright and spun around, hitting Ashley squarely on the arm with a closed fist.

"Ow," Ashley laughed out, rubbing the spot.

They were at the playground, and it was dark, partly because of the time of day but mostly because of the impending storm.

"That's for scaring me," Spencer smugly stated, not at all looking sorry for her actions.

"Puh-lease," Ashley dismissed with a light eye roll. "That didn't hurt. You hit like a girl."

"I am a girl," Spencer pointed out, crooking a brow.

"True," Ashley agreed, taking her hand and walking them over to the slide. "You're my girl."

Spencer's smile broke free but a second clap of thunder wiped it off. She involuntarily squeaked.

"You're such a chicken, Spencer," Ashley said with a snicker, gesturing for Spencer to climb up the small tube.

"We probably can't even fit in there anymore Ashley."

Ashley just rolled her eyes and gestured again, laughing when Spencer rolled hers before climbing in.

It was a tight fit but they managed to make it up the slide, right to the point that they were all those years ago, when they were much younger and unwittingly in love. Now though, ten years later, there was no mistaking that these two were head over heels and completely and unequivocally aware of it.

"Remember the first time we did this?" Ashley asked her, holding her close.

"Yeah," Spencer smiled, tracing Ashley's features with her eyes. "Best Friends Forever, right?"

Ashley wore a matching smile. "Right." And just like all those years ago, Spencer started tracing the proclamations, straying back to their own more than once.

And, just like before, Ashley started moving around, trying to get something out of her pocket.

Only this time, instead of a marker, Spencer's line of vision was blocked by the glint of a diamond ring, sparkling even against the darkness of the inside of the slide.

Her eyes shot over to Ashley who was smiling at her and looking shy and confident and sexy all at once. "This is where we make promises. This slide, this playground. So, now, I want to promise to love you Spencer, from now until forever if you'll let me. Say you will. Will you marry me?"

Spencer grabbed her by the face, pulling her close and kissing her with everything she had. She pulled back when there was literally no way she could continue without dying and just stared, speechless.

Then she kissed her again.

Ashley took it as a yes.

* * *

"Arthur?" Paula yelled out and tracked him down finally in the kitchen, having just come in from retrieving the mail. "Oh my God! Arthur?"

Arthur Carlin stood up from the oven, mitts on hands and apron around waist. "What Paula? Why are you yelling?" He looked over to his wife who was standing there, hand over her mouth as she held a colored piece of paper.

"Are you crying?" he asked her, making his way over to her.

"Look," she croaked out, holding out the piece of parcel.

_You are cordially invited to the wedding ceremony of Spencer Carlin and Ashley Davies. To be held at the Porter Street Playground in front of the slide. P.S. Bring your own candy!_

_

* * *

_

**Happy Belated Holidays and Happy New Year!**

**¡****Feliz Navidad y Feliz Año Nuevo!**


	46. A Minor Twist

**Author's Note:** Two things, because I'm slightly more interested in creativity than realism, understand that the songs alluded to in the fic are not relative to the setting. Most of them were recorded/published years later. Two, the DA is a popular men's hairstyle from the '50s. I got a few names for it, but most of them referenced some pop culture icon. This one and one other name was pretty neutral but I couldn't even fathom putting duck-butt hairstyle in a fic. Crazy right? Anyway, hope you all enjoy. Reviews are always appreciated. Also, thank you very much to my beta for helping me with this thing.

* * *

Spencer stepped out of the train car and onto the platform, blue eyes wide and searching.

Finally here.

Spencer couldn't even believe it.

People covered every single inch of the place, moving in every different direction.

Grand Central Station is a sight to behold, especially now. It was the '50s and Spencer had just made the biggest decision ever. Leaving the small town of Dayton, Ohio was difficult, although recent developments made it a little bit easier.

Spencer was homosexual.

She'd known it since she was old enough to know things, but putting a name to it was something that was next to impossible to do. You see, there weren't many homosexuals in Dayton. Anywhere really. It wasn't something people wore around like a pin on your jacket lapel. No, being a woman or man who liked other women or men was whispered about in back rooms or smoking clubs, behind closed doors, and in bathroom stalls. No one was homosexual these days.

Except, Spencer was, and she struggled with this development for most of her young adult life; failing in all her relationships with boys because she was never _with_ them. She was able to play it off as being a good little Catholic girl, but when Bobby Mason came by one fine afternoon and she overheard him asking for her father's permission to marry, Spencer panicked and ran to the one person she thought would understand. The one person who had sworn she'd always be there for her. The one person she thought loved her unconditionally.

"Mother?" she questioned, short of breath from rushing and the direness of her situation.

Paula Carlin was the epitome of the '50s mother – stark white blouses and long flowing flannel skirts, stocking feet and plain flats. She was a woman of the home, a wife to Arthur Carlin, and a mother to her children, Glen and Spencer, but she was not an individual – she had no identity that was hers alone and if Spencer had come to that realization then she'd have saved herself a whole lot of heartache.

"What is it dear?" Paula asked, face made up and bright. She placed another freshly dried plate into the cupboard. "You look as if you've seen a ghost."

"Bobby is asking Father for my hand in marriage," she rushed out, hand clutching at her chest.

Paula's face lit up with glee. "Oh goodness. Is he really? Oh. Spencer this is fantastic. He is such a well-mannered young man. Your grandparents will be so happy." Paula squealed, drying her hands on the dish towel before reaching out to cup her daughter's cheeks. "Aren't you happy Spencer?"

The girl's stomach lurched uncomfortably. "No, mother. I'm not. I don't want to marry Bobby."

Paula's features slowly dropped, the haze of happiness clouding over with concern. "But why ever not?"

"Mother," Spencer swallowed, steeling herself. "I don't want to marry Bobby. I don't want to marry any boy."

Paula's immediate thought was that her daughter wanted to become a nun and she almost said as much but then the way Spencer's face was pained did not speak of wanting to devote her life to God. No, there was something else there, etched across every corner of Spencer's face.

Paula pulled her hands away, letting them fall slowly to her sides. "What are you trying to tell me Spencer?"

Spencer's eyes closed and she almost took it back, almost decided that life would be much easier if she could just keep up the charade. But it was a lie, she knew. Life would be easier for everyone but her and what kind of life is one's own if they are living it for everyone but themselves?

"I do not like boys Mother. I…I like girls."

The resounding slap was immediate and solid, and Spencer's eyes burned with unshed tears.

She opened her eyes, a hand coming up to rest against her stinging flesh, mouth agape.

Her mother stood there, chest heaving and face redder than Spencer had seen her. In fact, she almost looked like a stranger.

"I…" her mother's voice shook on the lone syllable. "I will not tolerate that. It is not acceptable. Now, there is a perfectly fine young man out there who wants to marry you. And you are _going_ to marry him. Do I make myself clear?"

Spencer didn't really have a choice.

Spencer packed a suitcase. She went into her brother Glen's room – he was off at college – and took some of his clothes, his shoes. She took his cologne and aftershave. Lastly, Spencer took her mother's favorite sewing shears and inch by excruciating inch she cut off her long golden mane.

Spencer Carlin – daughter of Arthur and Paula – left the house for the last time.

And Spencer Carlin – the young whippersnapper from the Midwest – was born.

* * *

"Getcha paper! Read all aboudit!"

Spencer tugged her fedora a little lower over her eyes as she smiled at the young paper boy. She herself looked all of a twelve-year old boy in the clothes she had on; pleated trousers sitting high on her hips, a button down shirt, and the too big jacket with the wide lapel. But these were the things that young men wore and to fit in she had to look like them. It was the only way to survive she knew, and be who she wanted to be.

The winklepickers(shoes) she had on were shined to perfection and stuffed to the hilt with tissues and her hair was perfectly styled and slicked to the back in the DA fashion. She hitched her suitcase tighter in her hand and joined the hustle and bustle of everyday New York.

* * *

Aiden Dennison loved his city.

Born and bred in the Bronx, he was one tough cookie and had over the years carved out a niche in the city that never sleeps.

He worked at the Stork Club, procuring the job when he was only an ankle-biter. But his tough exterior and hidden charm made him the easy candidate for being one of the club's more infamous bouncers.

The owner, Mr. Sherman Billingsley, had entrusted him with other aspects of the club's operation, including the acquisition of new blood, which is why he was sitting in his Deuce, eyes peeled as they searched the packed streets for a face that stood out.

A loud piercing whistle jarred his concentration.

"Cast an eyeball at that Dolly over there!"

Aiden grimaced slightly before cutting his eyes over to his accomplice for the day. Mickey was not the smartest character around, but what he lacked upstairs the kid made up for with brawn. He was a big son of a gun, a visual insurance policy for Aiden should anyone decide to get testy.

"Cut the gas, Mick," the other boy hissed, taking out another cigarette and lighting it up. "Boss said he needs a new 'tender by tonight. And the only way that's gonna happen is if I find one because we know I'm the jets of this here operation. So, knock it off n' stop buggin' me or else you want a knuckle sandwich."

Mickey winced and slumped back into his seat, chagrined. "You ain't hafta yell at me." He stretched a little and propped his large legs up on the dash. "I'mma pile up some Z's."

Aiden rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the street. A nifty looking dame nodded at him and he almost broke his attention, giving her a quick smile but then he saw his mark.

* * *

Spencer was having a hard time navigating this city.

Everything moved so fast and there was so much of everything and she was beginning to think this was a bad idea.

"Hey Clyde, wait up!"

Spencer didn't think the boy was talking to her, but he was looking at her and when she slowed he seemed to do so as well.

"I beg your pardon," she said, masking her voice just barely.

Aiden cocked a confused eyebrow. "You an ivy leaguer? I must be slippin'."

"I don't understand," Spencer said, clutching her suitcase tighter.

Now, Aiden's face lit up in recognition, and he draped an arm around Spencer like they were old acquaintances. "Oh, I see. You not from around here, right? Well, allow me to introduce myself. The name's Aiden and this here is New York City, but I'm sure you knew that one already. So, what's you tale, nightingale?"

Spencer's blue eyes widened, confused and maybe a little afraid; or at least, she knew she _should_ be afraid. She could tell that the boy was being overly charming and that was a little suspicious, but she could somehow also tell that the boy meant no harm.

"I…I'm sorry. I have no idea what you just asked me," she finally stuttered out, cheeks warming.

Aiden laughed. "I know. It's a gift. I was just askin' where you're from since it's obvious you ain't a city slicker."

Spencer smiled. "Ohio."

"Wowee. That's…well, that's as far as I 'magine I've ever heard of."

"Yes. Well," Spencer cleared her throat, not really wanting to get into why she left, well, why _he_ left. "Long story short, I'm here now and trying to get myself together."

"Hmmm…" Aiden said, reaching that crucial point in the conversation. "You got a job?"

Spencer shook her head and before she knew it she was being whisked away.

**

* * *

**

Two weeks later…

Spencer slicked her hair back, looking at her reflection in the mirror.

She didn't know exactly how it had happened, but here she was, working in one of the finest and hippest establishments 1950s New York had to offer.

The interview had been incredibly easy. Mr. Billingsley wanted a fresh face young lad to dispense drinks to his famous patrons – someone who'd be appealing to the women and the men, not too intimidating and easy on the eyes.

Spencer fit that bill.

And sure, she was a little nervous. She was a woman living her life as a man and would be somewhat spotlighted in the club because they made the papers almost every night, but aside from the occasional 'You're a pretty boy' comment from Mickey, no one had suspected a thing.

Now, though, in the dim light of the club's interior and now that the music was wafting out and the liquor was flowing, she didn't question why it was so easy to overlook her femininity. Everyone in this place was gorgeous.

"How's it going, Spencer?" Mr. Billingsley clapped her on the shoulder as he made his way around the bar.

"It's going just fine, Mr. Billingsley, sir. Just fine," she smiled, pouring another double shot for Ms. Garland.

Judy just guffawed and leaned into her male companion some more.

"Stop it with the Mr. Billingsley, Spencer. Just call me Sherman," the man smiled, patting her companionably on the back.

Spencer smiled back and their moment was somewhat interrupted by Ms. Garland dropping her shot glass loudly on the bar counter. "Keep 'em coming, sweetheart."

Mr. Billingsley slipped away, off to continue his rounds for the evening and Spencer readied another double for Judy.

The woman dropped a finger on the corner of the napkin, tugging the shot glass toward her. She then beckoned Spencer forward, smiling sloppily when the young bartender did so.

Spencer blinked.

"You're gorgeous darling. Did you know that? You should be in entertainment. Give old blue eyes a run for his money," Judy drawled, her movements just a little bit clumsy as she leaned in to Spencer's ear.

Spencer smiled politely and backed away, wiping her hands on a towel as she did so. "Thanks Ma'am."

Judy snorted. "I'm not now nor will I ever be a ma'am, sonny boy. Heck, I'm hardly a lady."

* * *

Aiden and Mickey stood at the door, hands folded neatly across their fronts, only slight nods or subtle glares an indication of who could cross the velvet rope and who could not.

The line was long, around the corner even, and it was around that corner where two young girls stood, dressed to the nines and waiting anxiously for their shot at admittance.

"I'm flipping, Ash. This is so exciting. If we get in I'm going to be on cloud nine."

"If you don't cool it, we won't get in," Ashley hissed, batting away her sister's grabby hands. "Eyeball the people around us. They're not jumping around like they have ants in their pants."

"I can't help it, Ash. You've never taken me along with you, before. And we look so great. I'm trying to be still but my body won't let me," the younger girl whispers out. The line moved a little and she let out an exaggerated squeal.

"Try, Ky, okay? Cos if we get up there and we don't get in because of you, we'll be Squaresville, USA for the rest of our lives."

Ashley neglected the part where she'd tried getting in before, by herself, and someone told her the only reason it hadn't worked was because the club worked better in quantity not necessarily quality. So, while one hot broad at the end of the night might stand a chance of getting in, two hot broads sweetened those odds.

And let it be understood, they were out of sight.

Mickey noticed them right away. "Gotta let 'em in."

"We're at capacity," Aiden muttered out, displeased with Mickey breaking their unspoken code of not speaking while working.

"Two more dames ain't gonna hurt nothin'. 'Specially ones lookin' like that."

"You're on your own. But if boss comes lookin' fer a hide to kick, I'm giving him the address to your wazoo."

"No sweat," Mickey grinned, gesturing to the two sisters. "You two. You're in."

* * *

Kyla clung to Ashley like she was afraid they were going to get swept away.

The usher at the door smilingly took their coats at the check-in, and while she did feel gorgeous, she still felt like a very small kid in the hugest toy store.

And then she saw Bing Crosby and almost passed out.

Ashley nearly had to drag her over to the bar, hiding a pinch in the crook of the girl's elbow to show her displeasure.

"Ow!" Kyla hissed, rubbing the red spot that remained.

"You're embarrassing me," Ashley hissed back, her smile still plastered on her face.

"I'm nervous and Bing Crosby – _the_ Bing Crosby – is right over there. What did you expect?"

"Stop being such a droll," Ashley hissed, smiling at a couple of gentlemen that went by. "We're going to get kicked out if you keep it up." She absently rapped on the bar thinking a drink or two would calm their nerves.

The bartender was there she knew, having seen him down under the counter sorting things when they first walked over.

"What can I do for…" Spencer's voice trailed off unexpectedly. The most beautiful specimen she'd ever seen was sitting a few feet away from her and she suddenly felt the weight of the bottle of liquor she was holding. It almost slipped out of her hands but she re-established her grip before that happened, _thankfully_.

The girl, the one Spencer was staring at, was having a bit of a moment herself. Her smile was caught between wonder and confusion and for the life of her she couldn't remember what it was she was about to do.

A coda in the music broke the spell and Spencer blinked, setting the bottle down back behind the bar. She absently wiped a towel across the spotless bar counter and repeated her inquiry.

"Just two martinis, please?"

"Do you have ID?" Spencer asked, smiling when the other girl blanched. Surely Spencer had to know she was over eighteen years of age. "Just kidding. Two 'tinis, coming right up."

Ashley smiled shyly and tucked her hair behind her ear as she waited for their drinks. Her sister was still staring at all the people on the dance floor and it's a good thing too. If she realized she was sitting next to Lucille Ball, Ashley's sure even she couldn't cover up that catastrophic reaction. Besides, she was having a pretty nice time watching the bartender go to work.

Spencer realized right away what it was she was doing. Not that she could help herself but showing off as she made the girls' drinks was not something she typically did. But tonight, she was utilizing every trick of the trade she had picked up, pouring their finished mixes into their respective glasses with a flourish.

"Here you go," Spencer said softly, averting her gaze as she slid the two glasses forward. The other girl's fingers caught hers when she took her glass, the tips of both of their ears turning red at the contact.

Ashley pulled away slowly and Spencer snapped her hand back, tending to the other patrons.

She didn't see her again for the rest of the night.

**

* * *

**

A few more weeks later…

Aiden had a rare night off, but, like the over-achiever he was destined to be, he still found his way to the club, weaving in and out of the patrons, acknowledging some, speaking to others. Eventually though, he walked over to Spencer and spooked her something fierce.

"Whatcha lookin' at?"

Spencer's elbow gave way at the noise and she slid forward comically, only righting herself by slapping her palms on the counter loudly which garnered a few looks in her direction.

Aiden snorted and poured himself a glass of rum before settling in next to his friend now roommate.

It started out as Spencer just crashing on his couch until she had a place of her own, but, eventually it just became easier to give Aiden a few bucks and turn the couch into a bed. Besides, Aiden didn't mind coming home to a clean home and Spencer was a bit of a neat freak. It worked itself out, and aside from the strict bathroom and bedroom rules – both at Spencer's insistence – it was a pretty sweet arrangement.

"You're such a thorn."

"Don't rattle your cage, Spence. It was just a joke."

"Mmm-hmm. I got a big tickle out of it."

"Seriously, who's got you peepin'?" Aiden asked again, smirking when Spencer appeared to get nervous.

"No one."

"Shuckster."

"I'm not lying," she said, gripping the bar towel with renewed voracity. Her eyes darted out to the dance floor again and he followed them, eyes landing on her target in a matter of seconds.

"Aww, shucks, Spencer. You righto," Aiden snickered, clapping Spencer on the back. "And here I was thinkin' you mighta been one of those pansy boys."

"Excuse me." Spencer did not follow, but Aiden wasn't really listening, the alcohol having gone straight to his head. He lifted up the swing door on the bar counter, pushing Spencer on out.

"Aiden, what are you doing?"she hissed, trying to get back but he swing the counter down.

"You go on. Go ask that dame for a twirl. I've got the bar," Aiden said, shooing her.

"I can't," she tried again, but he was already walking to the other end, talking up some patrons.

There was a break in the music and something slow and casual came on – mingling music Mr. Billingsley liked to call it – and Spencer adjusted her bow tie just a minute before walking over to the table she'd had her eyes on for the last couple of minutes.

"Hi."

Ashley looked up from her seat, eyes falling on the bartender immediately. She'd felt him looking at her throughout the night – most nights, really – but they'd both kept their distance. Ashley, well, she was just worried she'd completely square out and embarrass the guy. He was, after all, in touch and on speaking basis with most of the celebrities who frequented this place so he had to be cool, right?

"Hi," Ashley barely manages to reply, a roguish smile on her face.

"Would you ladies mind if joined you?" Spencer asked, hands gripping the back of the empty chair next to Ashley.

Ashley's sister looked on as she watched her older sister become increasingly flustered. It was amusing to say the least.

"Nope," Kyla answered for them, smirking at her sister's wide eyes. "We wouldn't mind in the least. Would we Ashley?"

Ashley shot the other girl a look and merely shook her head, taking sudden interest in her napkin.

Spencer hurriedly sat down, smoothly though, so all was well.

"So, bartender, they finally let you get a break?" Kyla asked. After her first visit to the club, she'd determined that this was her kind of place, and her kind of people. It was fun to get all dolled up and bump shoulders with the more important people in this town and, because of her immense dedication to all things Hollywood, she had a vocabulary straight out of _Bringing Up, Baby_. She could act here because no one knew it was an act.

"I guess you could say that," Spencer answered, taking out a tin and pulling out a cigarette.

"Well, I am saying that," Kyla fired back, smirking when Spencer smiled.

The blonde nodded, lighting the cigarette. "You two are here a lot."

"That's not a question," the younger sister said.

"Observation," Spencer said, taking a long drag on the cigarette. "Never bring any guys with you."

"Another observation?" Kyla asked sweetly, batting her eyelashes.

Spencer was getting a kick out of the younger girl, that much had to be said, but she wasn't interested in her that way. She was far too young, and even though most of the men in this establishment saw age as nothing but an obscure number not even meant to be worked around, she still had her limitations.

"Yes. So, what's your name?"

"I'm Kyla," the girl said, sipping out of her glass. "This is my sister Ashley. But, you already knew that didn't you?"

Spencer coughed a bit, the shark intake of air at Kyla's statement making her do so. "Yes," she squeezed out of a burning windpipe. "You said so, earlier."

"But that's not why you know," Kyla said, feeling a little drunkenly courageous. "You've been eyeing my sister since we first came in here weeks ago. And _she_ is far too shy to approach you so why don't you just go for it stud."

Ashley gave her sister's arm a voracious smack. "Kyla," she hissed, glaring at her before turning back to Spencer. "Don't…ignore her. She's had too much to drink."

"No, I haven't," Kyla slurred, giggling shortly thereafter.

The music suddenly cut and before they registered what was happening there was deafening applause from around the whole place.

"Thank you. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen."

Kyla's eyes grew wide as saucers. "Is that?"

Spencer and Ashley both directed their attention to the stage where the crooner stood, spotlight on and a single microphone stand in front of him.

"My good pal Sherman asked me to come on up and liven up the joint with a little song. And since there are a lot of beautiful dames in here tonight, well, this song is only fitting…"

The beginning strains start and Spencer finds her eyes wandering over to the bar where Sherman and Aiden are standing, arms lifted in a toast to her, matching grins on their faces. She chuckles quietly to herself for a moment before standing, taking the one quick step to be at Ashley's side. She drops a hand down, holding it out. "Care to dance, Miss?"

Ashley's smile breaks her face in two and she whispers out a yes before taking Spencer's hand.

They wander out to the middle of the dance floor. It's not exactly crowded, but they're not the only ones there either.

Spencer stops and pulls the other girl closer, feeling her heart thud in her chest. Ashley's hands find their way to the back of her neck and Spencer's settle at her waist as they sway to the music.

_Yes you're lovely, with your smile so warm  
And your cheeks so soft,  
There is nothing for me but to love you,  
And the way you look tonight._

Ashley's head is on her shoulder, and she almost misses the whisper against her ear but is glad she catches it.

"What took you so long?"

Spencer doesn't have an answer but she holds the girl tighter.

* * *

"C'mon Spencer," Mickey groans from outside the bathroom. "We're gonna be late."

"I'm coming," Spencer says, gritting it out. She doesn't feel well and this has got to be the worst part about what it is she's doing, well, maybe second worst.

The worst is lying to Ashley about who she really is.

But going out with the guys and pretending she's not having horrible nearly debilitating cramps is a close second.

"Finally," Mickey sighs out when she walks out of the bathroom. "We get there any later and all the good spots is gonna be taken."

Aiden tugs the comb through his hair one last time. "Aw, Mick. Spence doesn't care about that anymore. He's jacketed, 'member?"

"Oh's yeah," Mickey says, grinning like a son of a bitch as they all file out of the door. "When are you guys gonna get circled?"

Spencer shoves him as they're walking down the stairs. "Shut up, Mick. It's not even like that."

"Not yet, anyway," Aiden adds, chuckling at Spencer's reddened face. "It'll be cool if you do. And if things keep going well with me n' her sister, Spencer and I will be brothers for real."

Spencer slows a bit at this revelation. It's not that she doesn't like Kyla and Aiden together. In all honesty, they balance one another out perfectly and it makes both of them much more tolerable to be around. It's just that hearing it out loud, from Aiden, makes it all too real, and brings forth all too soon the reality and direness of her situation.

She can't dwell on it too long because Mickey's pushing her aside and shouting "Dibs on passenger side!" and they're peeling off before she realizes.

* * *

Ashley's eyes are on Spencer's as she slides into the car, leaning over once she's inside for a quick kiss that turns into two, and then three and then four.

Aiden clears his throat loudly. "No back seat bingo until we get to the passion pit, capiche?"

Ashley pulls away sheepishly, using her thumb to get the lipstick off of Spencer's mouth. "Oh, hush it Aiden. You're only mad cos you can't drive and neck Kyla at the same time."

"Oh, I can. We just won't make it to the drive-in in time and Mickey's gonna go ape if he doesn't get to see his girl."

"Goose it, Aiden," Mickey grumbles, meaning for the boy to floor it. Mickey's girl is a little known starlet by the name of Audrey Hepburn and yes, folks, that was sarcasm. He'd seen her latest movies a grand total of five times but could not get enough. Every time she says "I have no illusions about my looks. I think my face is funny," he wants to shout out loud at the screen.

One time he did, but Aiden's slap had put an abrupt end to that.

Aiden turned up the radio, Frankie's _I've Got You Under My Skin_, playing out of the speakers.

Spencer's hand finds its way into Ashley's and the brunette turns and grins before scooting in closer. She looks beautiful, Spencer surmises, but then again she always does, and today wearing tapered pants and a form-fitting sweater was no exception.

"You're so pretty," Spencer says, bringing up her free hand to trace the contours of Ashley's face.

Ashley giggles, very becomingly. "You're sweet," she says, leaning into the touch. "You're the sweetest boy I've ever met actually."

Something in Spencer's chest turns cold and she shifts uncomfortably, leaning back against the seat.

Ashley notices. "What's wrong?" she asks, fingers ghosting over the smooth skin of Spencer's face.

Spencer swallows, not exactly trusting herself to speak with Ashley so close. "Nothin'," she breathes out, smile tremulous at best.

"Baby," Ashley says, tilting her head and smiling in that way that means she knows Spencer's lying. "What is it? You can tell me anything."

Spencer wishes more than anything that that were true, but it's not, and all too soon will come the day when Ashley will know all of her secrets. That'll be the day that breaks her. For now she just closes her eyes and swallows, pressing forward until she feels Ashley pressing back, lips coming together sweetly. "It's nothing you need to worry about," she tells Ashley, and it's the most honest thing she can say right now.

* * *

"Hi Spencer," Kyla greets, reaching over the bar for a hug. She's got a huge smile on her face and Spencer suspects it may have something to do with the glass in her hand.

"Hello, Kyla, doll," Spencer grins, hugging her back quickly. "Where's-"

"Right here," Ashley says, popping out from right behind Kyla. "Hi. Just starting your shift?"

"Yeah," Spencer replies, tugging on her suspenders. "How long have you been here?"

"Long enough to miss you," Ashley replies and Spencer's stomach bottoms out in a good way.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"O-kay. Now that you two hipsters are cookin'. I'm gonna go find Aiden and see if he wants to hang," Kyla says, although she highly suspects that they even heard her.

"When's your break?" Ashley asks, watching as Spencer puts together a patron's drink order.

Spencer smiles at her. "I just got here."

"Don't be a pooper Spence. Ask Mickey to cover for you." Ashley smiled and leaned a little closer. "I really want to dance with you."

Spencer pulled back, stealing a little kiss along the way. "Give me fifteen minutes and then we'll be made in the shade."

* * *

Spencer's really starting to develop a thing for Frank Sinatra.

_Somethin' Stupid_ is floating around the room and Ashley's pressed so close to her that she's beginning to wonder if you can even consider them two people anymore.

She holds her close, hands falling to the small of Ashley's back. Her evening gown is black and it's shimmering in the lamplight of the club. Spencer's bowtie has come undone and she rests her head against Ashley's as it's resting against her shoulder.

The song reaches the instrumental and Ashley squeezes her a little tighter as she lifts her head. Her eyes find Spencer's and for a moment Spencer's sure she can't breathe because all she can see is the promise of forever in their mahogany depths.

"If I tell you something," Ashley starts, still swaying slowly to the music. "Will you promise me not to flip?"

It's only fair, Spencer thinks, and she nods.

"I've…I've never been in love before."

Spencer stops moving, because, if she were a boy that statement would have flown right over her pretty little head, but since she's not a boy, she knows what's being said right now. Knows that this feeling is one she should cherish, knows she should let it fill her up so that when the time comes maybe the memory of how she feels right now will still keep her warm.

And Ashley, her Ashley, is standing there, unmoving and looking so nervous that Spencer almost wants to laugh. She can't though because if she laughs she will surely cry and she can't do that, not here.

So she settles for smiling, large and wide, and pulling Ashley closer, tucking the girl's head back to her chest where she knows she can hear and feel her heart pounding against her ribcage.

She drops a kiss to the crown of the girl's head and waits a moment for them to start swaying to the music again.

Then, "Me either."

_The time is right your perfume fills my head, the stars get red  
And oh the night's so blue  
And then I go and spoil it all, by saying something stupid  
Like: "I love you"_

* * *

Boys' Night Out had become kind of a tradition for the male workers at The Stork Club.

One night out of the month, the guys all got together and did things that young lads like themselves would do, which mainly consisted of grabbing a few drinks and going to the bowling alley, or taking turns looking at pin-up girls Aiden's apartment.

The point is this: No girls allowed.

Spencer always found the irony in her invitation.

There's a loud raucous roar and Spencer and Mickey both put their shot glasses down at the same time, Spencer's still half full.

Mickey swallows dryly and points a chubby finger at Spencer, laughing loudly at the grimace on her face. "Say it. Say it."

Spencer rolls her eyes, barely, the alcohol burning through her system. "You's the hippest cat in this fat city," she slurs out, her Ohioan accent making the words sound even funnier, and Mickey, Aiden, and the rest of the boys cackle like witches.

"Oh man," Aiden gasps, leaning heavily on a bar stool. "That is boss. You guys are a blast! Next round's on me!"

One of the guys slaps a hand on Aiden's shoulder. "All the rounds have been on you," he says, and Aiden just snort laughs, cracking up all over again.

"Hello buddy," Spencer hiccups, poking Mickey in the arm. "I hafta go to the john."

Mickey laughs, nodding more than necessary. "'Kay."

* * *

The stall in the men's room is out of order and Spencer's bladder is about to explode.

In hindsight, she shouldn't have done it, at least not while partly intoxicated, but she wasn't really thinking and she really had to pee.

She managed to finish up pretty quickly, but not before someone decided to join her in the restroom. She held her breath, hoping the other woman would go into one of the other stalls, but she didn't. She heard a purse unzip and then some fiddling at the sink so she knew that the woman was going to be there a while.

Spencer panicked.

She couldn't think of a better term to call it. Because what else would explain her rushing out of the stall, frightening the woman applying lipstick, and jostling out even after hearing the shriek behind her. She could have easily waited the woman out but she was drunk and wasn't thinking and now…

Spencer rushed past the guys, not sparing a glance in their direction and they barely noticed her anyway, much too concerned with their drinking and smoking and what not.

She ran out into the night air, turning up the collar on her jacket as she took out a smoke.

The bar door opened a few minutes later, a man stumbling out and peering around. Soon after, a woman came scrambling behind him, gripping his arms as her eyes peeled the streets.

Spencer realized too late what was going on and the woman spotted her, pointing her out to the guy, who did everything but growl as she approached him. Spencer got one good hit in before his fist crunched into her stomach.

She felt the air whoosh out of her lungs and she dropped to her knees, arms protecting her stomach from any more blows.

"Freak," the man bit out, smashing his fist into her face this time. "You like peeping at women, you pervert."

Spencer felt her lip split open and was trying to curl up in protection when an arm grabbed the man's, holding him back from further damage.

"Lemme go, Madison," the man yelled, looking at the woman, expecting to see her there.

But Mickey cold-clocked him before he could say anything, laying him out flat.

Aiden approached his friend, kneeling down beside Spencer and touching a hand to her shoulder. "You okay, Spence?"

Spencer drug herself into a standing position with his help, favoring her side as she went. "I'm fine," she choked out, feeling the bile rise in her throat. "I'm fine."

"C'mon buddy. We'll get you cleaned up," Aiden said, pulling her along but she jerked away from him.

"I'm okay. I just…" Spencer shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. "I'm okay."

* * *

Ashley opened her front door and her eyes widened the moment she saw her.

"Oh my gosh, baby," she said, pulling her inside immediately. "What happened?"

Spencer groaned, feeling the ribs shift when Ashley hugged her. "Fight."

"Who did this?" Ashley demanded, her hands hovering over Spencer's body, not knowing where to touch.

"Some guy," she says, waving it off. "Can you help me?" Spencer asks, looking up to Ashley with pleading eyes.

"Of course," Ashley replies, taking her hand and leading her upstairs.

* * *

Spencer's jacket is sitting on the tank of the toilet, and she's sitting down, her hands folded neatly in her lap. She's still wearing her button down, and underneath it is a t-shirt and duct tape, all carefully layered to obscure who she really is.

Ashley's brought a chair into the bathroom, and she's running a washcloth under lukewarm water, dampening it. The radio's on somewhere else in the house and Spencer smiles because of course it's Frank Sinatra.

_Strangers in the night exchanging glances  
Wondering in the night  
What were the chances we'd be sharing love  
Before the night was through_

Spencer watches as she brings the chair closer, placing it right in front of her and her hand reaches out to brush against Ashley's knee. The girl is in tapered pants again and she's wearing the shirt that Spencer gave her, the sleeves rolled up.

Ashley presses the cloth to Spencer's lip and the blonde hisses in a breath, head jerking a little.

"Sorry," Ashley whispers, smoothing a thumb over Spencer's cheek.

Spencer nods slightly. "Where's Kyla?"

"She's out with some friends," Ashley answers, focusing on Spencer's lip. She cleans it up pretty quickly actually and then she just sits there, eyes boring holes into Spencer's.

_Something in your eyes was so inviting  
Something in your smile was so exciting  
Something in my heart told me I must have you _

"Where else are you hurt?" she asks and Spencer swallows.

"I think my ribs are bruised."

Ashley's hand reaches out and sweeps across the area gingerly, and Spencer winces from the contact and the proximity of her hand to the tape – her secret.

"Baby, let me see," Ashley says, hands already tugging on the hem of Spencer's shirt.

Spencer's hands grasp hers as quick as lightning and Ashley's face telegraphs her confusion. "What-"

"You can't," Spencer says, closing her eyes. "…Not…not yet."

"What…not yet? Spence, what are you talking about? Lemme see how badly you're hurt," Ashley dismisses, trying to shake her wrists free.

Spencer redoubles her efforts. "It wasn't supposed to happen yet," Spencer is saying, eyes looking forlornly into Ashley's. "It's too soon," she mumbles out, but anytime would have been too soon. She knows this.

"What's too soon?" Ashley asks, not understanding at all.

"You weren't supposed to find out this way," Spencer says, loosening her grip and feeling her eyes burn.

Ashley feels her own start to tear up, and what's worse is she has no idea why. "Baby, you're scaring me."

Spencer lets go of Ashley's hands and slowly, almost painstakingly so, she pops the buttons on her shirt, shrugging it off of her shoulders when she's done.

She swallows thickly, the tears falling rapidly, but this has to be done and it was now or never and really, there's not going back now.

She reaches for Ashley's hands and she places them at the hem of her t-shirt, nodding once before letting go, trusting Ashley to know what she means.

Ashley's hands lift up the material and soon, Spencer can't see anything. She's closed her eyes but the sharp intake of air she hears is almost deafening.

The music has faded away and the only sound in the room is her heart, she's sure of it.

She feels her shirt being lowered and she squeezes her eyes even tighter, not wanting to see the hurt, confusion, and anger in Ashley's eyes.

She's unprepared therefore, when she feels a gentle hand cupping her cheek softly instead of a stinging slap.

She's unprepared when lips kiss her slowly, gently; instead of lips and tongue tearing her down to nothing.

She's unprepared for Ashley's breath against her ear, even and steady, the whispered "I knew. I think I've always known," like the sweetest swan song she's ever heard.

Her eyes blink open, unbelieving all of her other senses, needing to see this for herself.

And Ashley's right there, eyes fixed on hers, forehead pressed against Spencer's and hands wrapped around her face like she never wants to let go.

_Love was just a glance away  
A warm embracing dance away_

Ever since that night we've been together  
Lovers at first sight, in love forever  
It turned out so right for strangers in the night

* * *

Spencer told Ashley _everything _that night.

_Everything._

Spencer didn't want to be a boy and Ashley knew this and would be okay with being with Spencer as a girl, but that wasn't the way the world worked back then and Spencer decided it'd be best if she kept up the act for a little while longer.

At least until she saved up enough money to get them to Los Angeles or San Francisco. Places she'd heard were a little more tolerant than where they were currently.

Until then, Spencer was perfectly fine with wearing slacks and cutting her hair, and Ashley was perfectly fine with going along with it. As long as at night, when they were lying together, Spencer the girl came out, with all her curves and gorgeousness and beauty that Ashley just couldn't seem to get enough of.

So, it worked out for a girl from Ohio who turned her back on a life of security and acceptance in lieu of living how she wanted to, with a minor twist.

And if you see her, when she's older and sitting on the porch with the love of her life, she'd probably say something along the lines of…

_I've lived a life that's full -  
I've travelled each and every highway.  
And more, much more than this,  
I did it my way__._


	47. Deal of a Lifetime

**Author's Note: **Okay, it's not my favorite chapter but then again, so were a lot of chapters I've written. I admit it did get away from me because I'm working on this other project and let's just say that I had to watch like season one of SON just to get back into _them_. Still, it is, as always, a labor of love. Thanks again to my lovely BETA. I swear, betas make the world go 'round. Oh, I'm actually looking for a new beta for my Glee Fanfiction so, any Gleeks out there who'd like to help me out, send me a message or jot a line in the reviews. Please and thank you. Thanks for reading guys, really. It's like the best feeling in the world to know that people actually enjoy these little ficlets. Oh, and yay, three more to go.

Thanks,

MGMK

* * *

It was a typical Friday night for her and the boys, her crew if you will. Just her, Damon, Johnny, and Justin.

"Got a cigarette?" Johnny asked her and she nodded, fishing out a lighter as well.

He caught the items when she tossed them to him and Damon shook his head, kicking a toe into the ground.

"I don't know why you smoke those things," the young man said, hooking a thumb into his front jeans pocket. "Those things are highly addictive and they're bad for you."

"Come of it, Damon," Justin spoke up, snickering a bit. "Since when are we _not_ into doing things that are bad for us?"

He had a point, Spencer knew, because since they were old enough to leave the solitude of their own front porches, her and her guys had always found their way into mischief. Be it shaving all of the fur off of Mrs. Wilson's annoying ass cat or flooding the first floor level of their elementary school, this little gang of misfits did not shy away from trouble.

It was what they were good at, so when the opportunity came for them to work their own neighborhood, the gang jumped at it.

Spencer's head lifted up, observing a car turning down the street. It moved slowly and she felt Justin move just that little bit closer to her, his hand immediately reaching for the object tucked into the back of his jeans' waistband.

The car crept closer, windows still up and she could see that they were tinted.

Not good.

Everyone was guarded when it finally reached their corner, crawling to a stop.

Spencer approached as the window rolled down.

She was immediately relieved but didn't let her face show it, instead the hard glare she wore displayed to the world she only meant business.

The man in the backseat cleared his throat and anxiously fiddled with his tie, looking the entire world like a man who would rather he not be put in this predicament. And, honestly, he really shouldn't. He was the mayor after all.

"I heard that you had something…something good?"

Spencer quirked an eyebrow. "I might."

"How good is it?" the man inquired, eyes darting around nervously. He was sweating too. Like a pig. How appropriate?

"I've heard it's some pretty good shit. I wouldn't personally know," Spencer tells him, her scowl softening into something akin to a smirk. "I'd never touch the stuff. Hear it's bad for you."

The man's eyes narrowed. "How much?"

"You know my rates. Everyone knows my rates," she said, eyes rolling a bit. "Just cough up the cash old man and I'll hook you up."

The man frowned and held out a wrinkled envelope; crisp bills its obvious content.

"This had better not be taxpayer dollars," Spencer said, snickering a little as the man blanched. The son of a bitch probably thought she didn't recognize her.

"Here," she said, tossing a package of her own into his vehicle. "Do me a favor. Next time, drop the incognito act or send one of your cronies because my boys here have itchy trigger fingers and they really don't like strange cars rolling up on them," she said, gesturing to Damon, Johnny, and Justin, all of whom were openly palming the handles of their respective guns.

The man nodded quickly, desperate to get away and without another word peeled out down the street.

* * *

Spencer Carlin was a girl who'd grown up on the wrong side of the tracks.

Her story's not remarkably different in any way. She was the oldest of two children, and she currently only lived with her father.

Her drunk asshole excuse of a father to be exact. But she can't fault him really because he wasn't always that way. But when her mom died just as she was entering puberty something changed in her old man and their relationship was forever altered for the worst.

He started drinking, losing job after job in an endless parade of pitiful attempts at trying to maintain a home for his two children – keep them in the life they were accustomed to. But the loss of their mother only weakened the man's resolve and in order to keep them together she had to make a decision.

* * *

She'd been friends with Johnny, Justin, and Damon since before she could remember. Always a rough and tumble girl instead of the sugar and spice variety, she'd been with them through thick and thin and they'd always stuck by her.

Johnny was the oldest, and it showed. He was the first to do everything; the first to get suspended from school, the first to hijack a car, the first to get arrested, and the first to get a tattoo. And not necessarily in that order either.

Johnny was a badass for no reason at all. His parents were Catholic to the maximum. You know the kind of Catholics that go to midnight mass, early morning mass, midday mass, and evening mass. They practically luved at the church and Johnny, probably simply to spite them, did any and everything the Good Book told him not to.

Yeah, he was a bit of a prick.

Justin was Johnny's little brother by only a year and he worshiped the ground Johnny walked on and spit on and did all kinds of depraved things on so 'nuff said.

Damon was the baby of the bunch but not by much. He'd solidified his position in the group by drop-kicking some guy that had Johnny in a headlock at recess when they were six years old. Sure the guy was eight times his size and the kick just made him stumble backwards just a moment and Johnny ended up with a broken arm and Damon in almost a full body cast, but…it's the thought that counts.

Anyway, these are Spencer's friends, so when she came to Johnny one night and told him that she needed to make money fast or the state was gonna split her and Glen, her little brother, up, Johnny put her on to his own money-making endeavor:

Drug-dealing.

It wasn't the most glamorous of professions.

It was dangerous, your pay varied from week to week, there was no sick time or vacations (unless you counted getting arrested) and there were no retirement plans, but it was a way to pay for a roof over their heads and food on their table and for that Spencer would be eternally grateful.

Plus, it wasn't like she was _bad_ at it either so, win-win.

And she was perfectly okay with this set-up and this life until one mid-august afternoon working the corner with the boys.

It was a regular day, just like any other, and they'd bribed the cops for the week so they didn't even have to look out for pigs.

"I'm hungry," Damon said, kicking an aluminum can out into the street.

Justin groaned. "Quit saying that shit and go get you something to eat then, stupid."

"Don't call me stupid, stupid," Damon fired back, irritated and hungry.

Justin snorted. "Nice comeback. Where'd you get that from, your kindergarten classmates?"

Damon launched himself onto Justin's back, pounding his in between the shoulderblades with his fist and Justin just chuckled, throwing Damon off of him easily and continuing their wrestling match.

"That's gay, you guys," Johnny called out distractedly, used to them and their shenanigans, but they just ignored him, carrying out their favorite past-time obliviously.

Spencer looked over to Johnny, watching with interest as the boy sent out text after text. "Who're you talking to?"

Johnny's face heated up but it didn't show thankfully. "Elena."

Spencer snorted. "You still talking to that girl? She's crazy, man."

"You're only mad because she wouldn't go out with you," Johnny shot back playfully.

Spencer's smile turned into a smirk. "Like I said, she's crazy."

Spencer was vaguely aware of the figure marching slowly up the street, but she pretty much ignored it. Sale or not, she was having a conversation here.

"She just can't handle the awesomeness that is moi," Spencer continued and Johnny laughed out loud after that one.

"You might be right about that one," he said, shooting off another quick text. He sat back against the stoop and regarded Spencer quietly. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

"No, I'm _not_ interested Johnny. How many times do we have to go through this? I'm gayer than the audience at a Kathy Griffin stand-up set."

Johnny outright laughed at that. "No, not that. I'm over that. I was just wondering if you ever thought about getting out, you know? Settling down and living a normal life. Wife and kids and all that junk."

"You going soft on me Johnny?" Spencer asked, feeling her chest tighten just a little bit.

Johnny chuckled ruefully, ducking his head so that his stick-straight hair kind of fell in his eyes. "I was just wondering is all."

Spencer stared off into the distance, her grip tightening on the concrete they were sitting on.

"Sometimes…sometimes I think about that. Finding a girl and just walking away from this place and never coming back. Romance and all that junk but…then I remember that my little brother needs me and the little dream world just disappears. I gotta take care of him first. Keep him in line until after high school. He's gonna get a scholarship and then we'll be outta here for good."

Johnny studies her profile. "You just gonna leave us, too?"

Spencer's wistful look vanishes and her mischievous grin shines wide. "Nah, man. Gotta have my boys," she says, hitting him playfully in the arm.

They were so engrossed with their little heart to heart that they didn't notice the girl, well, actually, young woman approach them until she was right in front of them, clearing her throat nervously.

"Can I buy?"

Johnny saw her first and his face went from mirth to pure contempt in two seconds. He hated having to deal with addicts but that came along with the territory. He was already reaching for a package when Spencer spoke up.

"Ashley?"

The brunette's eyes kind of widened and she wrung her hands nervous, scrutinizing the blonde before her. Then, recognition washed over her features and she had the decency to redden somewhat. "Oh, um…hi."

Spencer couldn't believe it. Standing before her was the same girl she'd spent many a year hating for no other reason than she had what appeared to be a perfect life. Ashley Davies had successful, almost obnoxiously so, parents, excellent looks and grades, popularity, and the promise of a future that extended far beyond the reaches of Hoboken, New Jersey.

She also had this perfect specimen for a boyfriend – Greg something – and maybe that's the real reason why Spencer couldn't stand her.

Still, seeing her now, wearing a long-sleeved shirt in too warm weather – a characteristic Spencer knowingly associated with junkies trying to cover their track marks – Spencer was struck with an odd sense of propriety, like she still had something to prove.

Spencer blinked twice before speaking up. "Hey," she said, sitting up a little straighter. "What are you doing here?"

Something in Ashley's eyes sparks and Spencer feels like such an idiot because 1) she knew exactly what Ashley was doing there and b) now she'd unwittingly stated the unsaid; Ashley was way too _good_ to get caught up in something like drugs.

Johnny sniffs beside her and Spencer remembers that he's still sitting there. "You can buy," he grunts out, holding out a hand. "How much money you got?"

Ashley avoids Spencer's eyes as she digs around for the cash, pulling out crumbled bills and dropping them into Johnny's palm.

Spencer also finds herself unable to meet Ashley's gaze for the duration of the transaction and just stares at the tops of her shoes until it's over.

"Thanks," Ashley says quietly, scurrying away and Spencer kind of hates that she sounds just like all the others.

"You didn't get that here," is all Johnny says, his eyes focused on Spencer. "You know her?" he asks, once the brunette is out of earshot.

Spencer sighs, finally looking up and watching the other woman walk back down the street. "I thought I did."

* * *

Johnny lets it go, and she's grateful even though she's surprised.

They don't keep secrets from one another, ever, but for once Johnny seems content to not pry.

Besides, he'd know who the hell Ashley was if he'd actually attended school when they still went to school.

"That girl's real pretty," Damon says one day when they're all just hanging out. He nudges Spencer. "Think she'll be my girlfriend?"

"That's nasty man," Johnny says, curling his lip in disgust. "Girls on crack are the worst. They'll do anything for a fix. You don't wanna waste your time romancing that shit."

Spencer chuckles a little, her throat suddenly closing up. "Yeah man. Once a crack whore always a crack whore."

She really hopes that Ashley doesn't come back.

* * *

Ashley does come back though.

Every week like clockwork, and always on a Thursday.

Spencer never sells to her although she makes sure she's always around, lurking nearby or playing some stupid card game with Damon and Justin, but she'd always there watching, never saying anything, just quietly observant.

One Thursday though, Johnny's a little further down the street, making a major deal and Justin's taking a leak in the alley and Damon is…somewhere. Probably stuck to Justin's ass she thinks in amusement. Point is though, there's no one there to sell to Ashley. That is, no one but her.

Ashley's approach is slower than usual and it takes a minute for Spencer to figure out it's because aside from that first day they've never spoken. And yes it's a little weird because they both knew each other before all of this, before the mistakes they've made or the roads they've chosen, back when they were both viewed in a different light.

Spencer stares at a pot just over the brunette's shoulder and doesn't look away from it, even when she hears the rustling of fabric and then bills.

Ashley holds the money out wordlessly and Spencer takes the hint. She walks up the stoop a little, reaching behind the stone ledge for the small package. She tosses it in her hand a little, weighing it, debating, but then she shrugs and emerges, handing it off to Ashley and taking the cash.

"Thanks," the brunette murmurs, shaking a little before righting herself. She turns to leave, her legs quivering and Spencer makes a snap decision.

"I'm hungry," she says and Ashley stops where she stands.

She slowly turns back around, tucking the baggie into her front jeans pocket. "What?"

"I'm hungry," Spencer states again, nodding once like she's convincing herself of the fact. "I could go for a burger. You look like you could use one too," she adds on softly, hoping Ashley gets the hint.

She does.

"I could," Ashley says, crossing one leg in front of the other in a move so reminiscent that Spencer almost smiles. It was always how the girl stood in high school.

"C'mon," Spencer says, holding out a hand. "I'm buying."

* * *

So Ashley doesn't actually take her hand but she does take her up on her offer and that's how they ended up at the grease joint, waiting patiently for their order of burgers, fries, and milkshakes.

Spencer lied.

She isn't hungry at all, but Ashley was displaying the telltale signs of someone who'd eaten too little and used too much and Spencer would be damned if she let the girl O.D. on her stuff.

"So, I have to ask you…" Spencer starts and Ashley's eyes flash dangerously. It's a warning look, Spencer knows, but that doesn't mean she gives a fuck. "…why…why are you doing this stuff?"

Ashley crosses her arms across her chest. "Why are you selling it?" she fires back and that stings a little.

Spencer nods, leaning back in her seat a little. "Touché," she says, playing with her nails absentmindedly. "I was only asking because I just never dreamed you'd be…into this."

Something visibly melts off of Ashley and she sinks a little lower into her seat. "I wasn't always. Not when we were in school anyway."

Their food arrives and Ashley swallows without chewing a handful of fries and a bite of her burger before Spencer clears her throat.

"What happened?"

Ashley's eyes kind of glaze over and it's almost a look to palpable for Spencer to take, but she stays the course, waiting to see if the brunette felt like sharing.

"Greg… you remember Greg, right?"

Spencer cannot suppress the eye roll and Ashley's a little slow to stop her giggle.

"Yes, well, he got into it real bad after high school. I only played around with it for a little while but…" Ashley shrugs. "…the hits got more frequent and it started taking a little more before I could feel the rush, you know?" She looks at Spencer and at once it becomes apparent that no, Spencer does not know.

She shrugs again. "It's my life, okay? I don't really care what anyone thinks, let alone a dealer. It's a bit hypocritical don't you think? To sell to people and then judge them?"

"I'm not passing judgment," Spencer's quick to say. "Not in the least. It's just, well, I guess I wanted better for you."

It's not what Ashley expects to hear and Spencer admittedly hadn't meant to say 'wanted'. 'Expected' was what she'd formulated in her head, but, Freudian slips tend to work that way, don't they?

They don't speak much after that.

* * *

She spreads the word pretty quickly and usually when Spencer speaks it's prudent to heed her direction.

So, no one is to deal to Ashley Davies.

No one but Spencer.

* * *

"That's some crazy shit, Spencer," Johnny tells her one afternoon.

It's Thursday.

Spencer shrugs. "I don't care. It's how I want it."

"But, why? I mean, why the hell should it matter where she gets it from? We sell the same shit, and it's not like we individually profit from deals. We split the pay every night. So what the fuck, dude?"

Spencer feels her face get hot and she's one second from slapping the shit out of him. She doesn't feel like she has to explain but if she told him the reason why he'd really flip his shit.

"Don't worry about it Johnny, okay? I have my reasons and let's just leave it at that," she says, standing to meet Ashley before she reaches the stoop.

* * *

Spencer's been giving Ashley watered down product for weeks and it's starting to show.

The brunette's putting on weight and the pale chalky color of her skin has subdued somewhat into subtle warmth.

She's also become more moody, something Spencer calls her out on during their weekly rendezvous.

Ashley's eyes soften. "I'm sorry," she says, dousing her French fries in even _more_ ketchup. They were swimming in it now. "I've just felt so off lately. My roommates are about to kick me out because I'm been such a bitch to them."

"So what?" Spencer says, trying to avoid the topic. "You shouldn't be staying with them anyway."

Ashley knows she means she shouldn't be staying in a crack house but she doesn't say anything. "They're my friends."

"They're not your friends."

Ashley puts the ketchup bottle down, not meeting Spencer's gaze. "Closest I've got."

Spencer's hand covers Ashley's just before the brunette reaches for another fry. "Wrong again."

* * *

The first time they kiss Spencer's sure Ashley's gonna kick her ass.

"What the hell is this Spencer?" Ashley says, throwing the bag at the blonde.

Spencer picks it up and examines the white rocks. "Good shit," Spencer answers, so convincingly she almost fools herself.

"It's fucking baking soda," the brunette all but shrieks, and Spencer shoves her into the alleyway, away from prying eyes. "Get your damn hands off of me," Ashley yells, swatting aggressively at Spencer.

But the blonde holds fast, pressing Ashley until the brunette is pinned between her own unmoving body and the brick building. "I want you to stop using."

Ashley tries pushing her away again, but Spencer's stronger and Ashley curses the fact that the lack of a certain drug coursing through her body makes her this way.

"I can't," she whispers brokenly, feeling the fight leave her. "I don't know how."

Spencer's heart clenches. "Let me help you," she whispers back, pressing closer. "I can help you. Let me be your drug."

"What?"

Spencer answers with a kiss.

* * *

So Ashley doesn't knee her in the groin like she expected but she isn't as receptive to the kiss as Spencer would have thought.

Still, she lets Spencer drag her to Spencer's place and lets Spencer put her in Spencer's bed without much resistance.

"Why are you doing this?" Ashley asks her, curled up under covers even though she's sweating profusely. Her stomach is starting to cramp and her body hurts but she knows she's not at the worst of it.

Not by a long shot.

Spencer is sitting in a chair, making shadow puppets in the lamplight in her room. "I don't really know."

* * *

Spencer makes it home one night and finds Ashley in the kitchen. All the cupboards are open and the fridge is too and there are several pans everywhere.

For a moment Spencer freezes, wondering absently if the girl is looking for some drugs.

"How about macaroni n' cheese?" she hears Ashley ask.

"Nuh uh," her little brother asks and it's only then does she recognize the pair of legs swinging under the kitchen table. "Hamburger helper."

Spencer smiles and clears her throat as she walks into the kitchen to make her presence known.

"Spencer," Glen squeals, jumping out of the cahir and tackling her about the thigh. "You're home!"

Ashley turns around, the dark circles under her eyes prominent, but she grins and sighs in audible relief. "Thank God. He wants hamburger helper but there is none in here." She's shaking, Spencer notices. And it warms her heart to think that Ashley had put aside her own discomfort in favor of helping her little brother.

She holds up the box she was hiding behind her back.

Hamburger helper.

"Spence, I love you!" Glen says before wrapping her up in another hug.

* * *

Ashley's entire body is curled in on itself and she's so cold she doesn't know how to even breathe.

"Tell me what to do," Spencer asks, and the blonde is right there, holding her close.

"I…. need….coke," Ashley bites out, her nails biting into her own palms so deep she may be drawing blood.

"Anything else….c'mon Ashley, anything else in the world," Spencer implores, wanting so badly to help the crumbling figure she holds in her arms.

Before she knows it she's kissing her, hard and wet and sound.

Ashley's body is still shaking but she responds in kind, giving as hard as she's getting.

Spencer rolls them over so that she's on top, her body pressed firmly against the one underneath her and the brunette groans, her hands roaming Spencer's back, nails scratching through fabric.

They kiss and they kiss and they do much more than kissing.

Over and over until Ashley's too tired, too sated to think about that next hit.

* * *

Spencer's done a fairly decent job of balancing it out.

Selling, hanging with the boys, hiding Ashley and taking care of her family.

It's a lot of balls to juggle.

Eventually one of them has to drop.

* * *

It's a Thursday and she's down the street, making their weekly quota in a day's work if she makes this sale.

Damon's selling a couple of nickels' worth and Justin has his own client.

In other words, they're really fucking busy.

Johnny had just recounted his stash when Ashley walked up, head down and fists clenched.

"I need…I need…"

She can't quite bring herself to say it though and he just nods subtly, looking down at Spencer quickly before looking back at Ashley.

"How much money you got?"

"I don't have any," Ashley says, averting her eyes. It's the truth too. Spencer's taken all of her money in an attempt to prevent Ashley from getting drugs.

She hadn't counted on this though.

"Sorry shorty. No green, no blow. You know how it goes, so…" he gestured his hands in a skidaddle motion, waving her away.

Ashley looks severely conflicted, chewing her lip and casting her eyes around anxiously. "I can…I can do something else."

Johnny's eyes widen noticeably but his smirk turns up pretty soon after. "What'd you have in mind?"

* * *

Damon and Justin are in another one of their little tifts when Spencer makes it back over to their stoop.

She's still pocketing the wad of cash when she notices that Johnny's missing.

"Hey!" she barks at the pair, trying to be heard over Damon's grunts. Justin's got him in a pretty decent headlock. "Where's Johnny?"

Justin looks up. "Took some girl inside. Gonna get hooked up, you know?"

Damon kind of nods, handing prying Justin's loose a little. "That girl we went to school with. 'Member?"

Spencer's eyes widen and she races up the stoop step, throwing open the door and darting up the not safe stairway. She finds Johnny in the first room, back pressed against a wall, pants at his ankles and a familiar brunette head hovering near his groin.

He lets loose a loud groan and then a grunt when Spencer sucker punches him.

Johnny stumbles to the side, the blow catching him completely off-guard. At first he thinks it's Ashley and blindly lunges at the girl but another blow to the face stops that.

"What the fuck are you doing Johnny?"

"Shit," Johnny hisses, pushing himself off the floor and quickly pulling up his pants. "What's your problem, Spencer?"

Ashley scrambles away, standing against the opposite wall and hugging her torso. "What's _my_ problem? _My_ problem."

"Yeah, Spencer. What the hell is your problem? I'm just taking payment," he says, smirking.

"Since when does payment require your dick!"

Johnny rolls his eyes. "Whatever Spencer. This is what we do when the girls can't pay. You _know_ this so stop acting like you don't. Remember? Once a crack whore always a crack whore."

Spencer closes her eyes, the words echoing around the room.

"And I don't know what you're thinking but that thing over there looks like a crack whore," Johnny finishes.

"Don't…" Spencer starts, holding up a hand. Johnny looks chagrined but he doesn't say anything more. She turns to the brunette, finding her stricken.

She goes over to her, ready to comfort her but Ashley's slap resounds loudly in the room.

"Don't touch me," Ashley spits out, tears running hot down her face. "Just….don't."

She runs away, leaving Spencer standing there in the crumbling building.

After a while Johnny slumps out too. He reaches for her but she jerks away from his grasp.

* * *

They're all sitting in the booth; Johnny and Justin on one side, Damon and Spencer on the other.

It's quiet between them and the beers their nursing are more props than anything else. Finally, Johnny breaks the silence.

"Why didn't you just tell me Spencer?"

Spencer's blue eyes are like ice on him. "Tell you? Johnny, you're my friend but you're an asshole. And you're even more of an asshole to addicts."

He rubs the back of his head, having enough decency to look a little embarrassed. "If you'd have told me I would've never…you know."

"Yeah well, you did and it's done. So I'm done. Leave it, okay?" Spencer bites out, holding her beer bottle a little tighter than necessary.

Damon and Justin look uncomfortable at best. Things with them had never been this tremulous before. Besides, they worked better when they were rolling around in the grass, trying to inflict physical harm on one another.

Spencer was pissed sure, but more than that she was upset with herself. She's not sure exactly what she could have done but not going after Ashley that day weighed heavily on her conscious.

"Stop being a pussy, Spencer," Johnny suddenly spits out, eyes hard on her.

"The fuck?"

"Man the fuck up and stop moping around here like a little punk. You're pissing me off," Johnny says, actually looking a little intimidating.

"I'm gonna," Spencer grumbles before shooting out of her seat but Johnny's right there with her.

"You're gonna what, huh?" Johnny says, daring her to do something. "Just like I thought. Get off your ass and go after the girl if she's really what you want."

Spencer really wants to hit him but he hasn't really done anything to provoke her and even she's not sure if she can get away with hitting him a third time without him hitting back.

"C'mon Spencer. You're wasting my time."

She's not exactly sure what just happened there but maybe Johnny's smarter than he looks because he just worked reverse psychology to perfection.

"Don't bring your ass back here."

* * *

The door opens and Spencer's shoulders droop just a little.

"What?" the glassy-eyed woman asks, rubbing absently at her arm.

"Is Ashley here?" Spencer asks, peering behind the woman.

There's loud music on inside and Spencer can just make out the silhouette of someone slumped over on a tacky chaise lounge chair.

The woman closes the door a little. "Who?"

"Ashley? Ashley Davies?"

The woman looked honestly confused and then her eyes spark a little bit. "Oh, Ash! Yeah!" she nods, slight smile on her face. "Oh yeah, I know Ash."

Spencer nods too, waiting for more information.

"What?" the woman asks, cottoning on to Spencer wanted more information from her.

"Is she here?" the blonde asks, again, this time barely suppressing an eye roll.

"Is Ash here?"

"Yes," Spencer says, throwing her hands up in exasperation.

"Um, no. No. She moved out like…maybe a couple months ago. But, you know what, she did come by here a few days ago."

Spencer just waited it out again.

"Oh, you probably want to know where she's at now though, don't you?"

Spencer holds back her shout and just rubs a hand over her face. "That would be helpful, yes."

"I think she's living with her brother but you know something. You're kinda tense. I've got some stuff in here that can relax you and stuff. So you can mellow out," the woman says as she opens the door wider in invitation.

"I think I'll pass," Spencer tells her, turning away and leaving before the woman even realizes she's gone.

* * *

Spencer's stomach is twisting in knots when she rings the doorbell.

She's never been to this part of town and to be honest it was more like a couple of streets, but it consisted of manicured lawns and picket fences and two-car garages.

Basically, it was all of the things Spencer's sure she will never have.

She'd heard about Ashley's brother during one of the girl's more revealing withdrawal rants.

Ashley let her know repeatedly that there was someone out there who loved her. She had a brother and she'd see him as soon as she got back on her feet.

"_I will Spencer. I will."_

"_I believe you."_

Spencer was torn away from her flashback by a young man laughingly opening the front door. He had a little girl wrapped around his shoulders and a puppy nipping playfully at his bare toes.

"Hi," the man says, breathing heavily. "Can I help you?"

Spencer's momentarily taken aback. The scene is reminiscent of something she's seen in a Hallmark card. "I was looking for Ashley…Davies."

The man's eyes kind of harden and he sets the little girl down on the floor. "Go back in the living room sweetie. Daddy'll be there in a little while."

The little girl giggles, picking up the little puppy. "Come on Snicklefritz."

"What do you want with my sister?"

The tone of his voice is all business and Spencer knows she's on a short leash. He probably thinks she's one of her drug friends, which, technically, she is.

"I just want to talk to her. Make sure she's okay," Spencer tells him, and she's being honest. She just really needs to lay eyes on Ashley again.

He looks hesitant and she can't blame him but there's someone else at the door now and Spencer's thoughts all crash in on one another. She doesn't even know what to say but she had a plan until Ashley showed up at the door.

A really kick-ass plan.

One that didn't involve her standing frozen in a doorway, mind numb and wondering if she even knows how to speak without stuttering.

"It's okay Aiden," the brunette says, giving the man a little smile. "This'll only take a minute."

The young man turns to leave. "Call me if you need me," is what he calls out over his shoulder.

"Brother?" Spencer asks, nodding at his retreating form.

Ashley nods and folds her arms across her chest. "What are you doing here, Spencer?"

"I…I wanted to see you," Spencer manages to say.

"Why? I'm just a crack whore, right?"

The words should cut but they don't. "You were never _just_ anything," Spencer tells her, her voice surprisingly steady. She'd expected it to be tremulous at best. "Don't pretend like you didn't know that."

"When Johnny said-"

"_Johnny_ said it. Not me," Spencer interrupts. "If I didn't care about you or thought about you like…_that_, why would I waste my time getting you clean? Why put you up in my place and give you my bed? Why would I stay with you on those nights when you thought you were going to die? Does that make sense?"

"No," Ashley concedes. "But neither does selling drugs when it's clear that you hate what it does to a person. You and Johnny both."

Spencer shrugs. "It's a means to an end."

Ashley dismisses that with a wave of her hand. "It is a dead end."

"This is not what I came here for."

"Well, what did you expect Spencer? You expected to just show up here and I'd fall into your arms. Newsflash: I'm a recovering addict. There is no way I can be with you, not while you're still a dealer."

Spencer knew this and now she understood Johnny's last statement. She was done with that. Done with them.

"I'll quit," she said, conviction in her voice. "I'll get a job and take Glen and move out of Hoboken. I just…Ashley, I want you."

Ashley still didn't look convinced.

Spencer reached out and took her hand, holding it as tightly as she could without hurting the other girl. "Look, I know it's going to be hard. Nothing you ever really want is easy to obtain, but…I can't _not_ try, Ashley. Please let me try."

Ashley did.


	48. Dance With Me, Poker Face

**A/N: **Totally couldn't decide which one I wanted to post and which one I wanted to scrap so I'm posting them both as one. I'm working on the big finale and it should be up by weekend's end hopefully. Maybe even tomorrow if I finish it up tonight. Thanks for reading and reviewing and for those of you who have been around since gah, I don't even know Tasha and Brandon, through Sparky, and crazy mob surfers thanks a bunch for hanging in there.

* * *

****Dance With Me****

"C'mon Ashley," the woman nearly yelled across the parking lot.

A few people turned to stare at her and she couldn't help turning a little red before glaring at her sibling.

"Sorry," Kyla offered sheepishly, slightly shrugging her shoulders.

"You know, when I offered to get these classes for you two, I didn't see where my involvement extended beyond that," Ashley grumbled, slinging a duffle bag over her shoulder.

Aiden laughed as he closed the trunk of the car, shouldering both his and Kyla's bag. "You knew Kyla was going to drag you along, Ashley. Don't pretend like you're just meeting her."

"Yes," Kyla agrees, hooking an arm through both Aiden and Ashley's. "And I knew there was no way Aiden was going to come if his best friend isn't involved," Kyla adds, rolling her eyes at him. "You'd think having his fiancée with him would be enough."

"Aww, babe," Aiden coos, bumping into her affectionately. "You're more than enough," he grins, leaning down expecting to meet her lips.

Ashley, however, was having none of that.

"Nuh uh," she said, yanking on Kyla's arm before Aiden landed. "None of that crap in front of me. I just ate."

Aiden laughed again and Kyla just rolled her eyes. "You're so annoying. If we weren't related, you so wouldn't even be _in_ my wedding."

"I'm confused as to how you're even allowed to get married," Ashley starts, opening the double doors and leading them both inside. "I mean, if Aiden's like a brother to me and you're my actual sister, doesn't that make you two related?"

"Only in your head Ashley," Aiden explains, still smiling at the girl. He takes a look at his surroundings and blanches. "Whoa."

Kyla lets go of both of their arms and squeals excitedly, bouncing on the ball of her feet. "This is going to be so much fun."

"Oh yes. Just like that root canal I got," Aiden deadpans, shoving his hands inside his pockets.

Ashley snickers and nudges him with her elbow. "Told you she was adopted. Only she would think this is cool."

"Seriously, Kyla," Aiden starts, letting his hair fall into his face as he looks at the people around him. "These guys are like trained dancers. We'll look ridiculous next to them."

"No, we won't," Kyla assures him, taking his hand. "This is a dance class. We learn to dance here. So it doesn't matter if you don't know how. And I want my husband's first dance with me to not look like shit so suck it up," Kyla adds on, pulling him to the front of the room.

Ashley chortles when Aiden flashes her a desperate look and mock salutes him when he beckons her to follow.

A single-finger salute, that is.

"Well, that wasn't very nice," she hears a voice say way too close to her ear.

Ashley doesn't react too badly though, just leans away a bit to look at whoever has chosen to mistake her for an approachable person.

"I'm not nice," Ashley says, really before she's actually looked at the other woman. Once she does though, she immediately regrets it.

The blonde in front of her smirks, crossing her arms across – well, actually, just underneath – her chest. She's wearing what one should wear to dancing lessons she supposes. Loose fitting pants and a billowy top that should hide her figure but somehow it manages to highlight it even more.

The blonde's eyebrow raises. "You look nice."

Ashley shrugs, shifting uncomfortably in her form-fitting jeans. "Looks can be deceiving."

The blonde smiles outright and Ashley feels her face shift to mirror it. She catches herself though.

"Very," the blonde agrees, backing away from Ashley slowly, arms still folded. She picks her way through the throngs of bodies to the front of the room and Ashley blatantly checks her out.

What? If she's gonna be bored out of her mind learning how to waltz for crying out loud the least she could do is ogle the goods readily on display.

It's only right.

What isn't right?

This woman, the one that Ashley's not so subtlety checking out, is the instructor of this dance class.

And she has a new favorite student: Ashley Davies.

***O*O***

Aiden's still laughing and Ashley is using every ounce of restraint to keep herself from tackling him right here in this dance studio.

"Your face…when she called you up there…baaahaahaaahaa," Aiden manages to get out before dissolving into loud cackles.

Kyla's smiling too, but mostly in amusement because of Ashley's grumbling.

Her sister is pouting something fierce, tugging back on the shoes the dance instructor made her take off.

"I'm gonna kick your ass, Aiden," Ashley finally reaches a breaking point, stepping menacingly forward, but there's a hand on her shoulder and after her little lesson, she knows exactly who's hand it was.

***O*O***

"_Good afternoon, everyone. My name's Spencer and I'm going to start today's lesson with a little warm-up exercise. Would anyone like to volunteer?"_

_Kyla's hand shoots up into the air and she tries to make grab for Aiden's too, but the man moves slightly to the left, eluding her grasp._

_Spencer's not looking at them anyway._

_Her eyes are on the back of the class, on the brunette trying to duck behind a lanky blonde._

"_You," Spencer states, pointing in Ashley's direction._

_The brunette looks behind her before poking a finger to her sternum. "Me?"_

"_Yes, you," Spencer nods, quixotic smile on her lips._

"_I…" Ashley stutters nervously. "I didn't volunteer."_

"_Oh, I know. That's how I choose my volunteers. Come on, now. Don't be shy," Spencer says, waving her forward as the class parts to allow her passage. "I won't bite," she adds, watching Ashley's eyes for a reaction._

_The brunette's eyes spark but she swallows it down, shuffling to the front of the room slowly._

"_Okay, finally," Spencer says, using her hands on Ashley's shoulders to position her in front of the room. "I've got you where I want you."_

***O*O***

"Are you doing your 'not nice' shtick again?" Spencer playfully asks, stepping up beside her. "Because it really wasn't convincing."

Ashley's sly remark is cut off by an overly enthusiastic – or flappy – Kyla. "You have to ignore Ashley most of the time. She has, like, no social skills. Your class was awesome though."

"Thank you," Spencer muses, casually looking over the shorter woman. "Are you and…Ashley…"

Kyla's face pales. "Oh…oh God, no. No, she's my sister," Kyla hurriedly says, immediately grossed out. Her mind just went places it should never be allowed to. "Actually, she got us dance lessons as an engagement gift," Kyla says, tugging lovingly on Aiden's arm.

"Oh, what a lovely gift," Spencer remarks, eyes finding Ashley's again. "It's almost…nice."

Ashley's eyes narrow toward the blonde and Aiden snorts, noting that telltale look in his best friend's eyes.

"Hey, Ky, let me go get you something to eat. I'm sure you must be famished," he says, tugging on her arm.

"Actually, I'm okay."

"Are you sure?" he stresses the last word, widening his eyes and gesturing to the stare-down Ashley and Spencer seemed to have suddenly been caught up in.

"Oh. _Oh_. Yes," she nods, grabbing her stomach. "Starved. Hey, Ash, we'll be at Subway."

Ashley nods in their direction, effectively shooing them off without ever looking away from Spencer.

"I don't appreciate what you did," Ashley finally says, after a long period of silence.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Spencer replies, playing innocent.

Ashley's eyes narrow even more. "I think you do."

***O*O***

"_You see, posture in dance is almost as important as rhythm. I know people think dance is fluid – all motion and soft edges, but there is rigidity in its methods. The beat is a bass line and without posture and form, you could resemble a limp noodle on the dance floor. Now, Ashley, is it?" Spencer asks, turning to the woman again._

_Ashley rolls her eyes. "That's what this sticker on my chest says."_

_Spencer stares at her chest. "That it does. Can you come here?" she asks, holding her hands out._

_Ashley steps forward and is instantly in Spencer's arms, one of the blonde's hands pressed at the small of her back, the other tightly grasping her own hand, holding it up and out to the right. "What the-" Ashley breathes, shock (and a little something else) evident in her tone._

"_There," Spencer whispers, face close as ever to Ashley's. "Hold your head upright. Relax back into my arm, but hold your head upright."_

_Ashley follows her directions but not entirely because her body's telling her too. The relaxation might just be plain swooning._

_Spencer cues the sound man and proceeds to dance with Ashley, guiding her body in ways that could only be described as sensual. And Ashley, the unwilling (read: willing) participant, just bends and conforms like one of those snap-on bracelets. Every twist and turn feels like something she's not capable of maintaining but every time she falters, Spencer's there and for the first time Ashley'd ever done anything more than sway back and forth to the music she was actually pretty good._

_Judging by the class' applause._

_She was actually this close to not caring that Spencer was systematically turning her into a pulsing mass of wantonness. _

_She was that close until Spencer dipped her and casually (and somehow unbeknownst to their audience) slipped a hand somewhere that had absolutely nothing to do with dancing._

_Ashley squeaked._

"_Very nice," Spencer drawled._

***O*O***

"I don't take very kindly to strangers groping me."

"Oh please," Spencer dismisses, stepping closer to Ashley. "Like you didn't enjoy it."

"Look, I don't know what you thought or whatever…"

"I don't think anything. I _know_," Spencer states, stepping even closer. "And right now, I _know_ you want me," she adds on in a whisper for good measure and she literally watches the veil fall from Ashley's eyes.

"Nearest bed," Ashley mutters out, eyes going foggy. "Now."

"Who said anything about a bed?" Spencer asks, quirking an eyebrow.

***O*O***

"It's been a long time now Aiden. Can we go back?"

"Not…quite," Aiden says, sitting back in the Subway booth seat. "We've got another couple minutes or so."

"But I'm bored," Kyla mumbles, pouting as she folds her arms across her chest like a petulant child. "Ashley should be done talking to that lady by now."

"Trust me," Aiden says with a smile. "They've still got plenty to discuss."

***O*O***

"I don't know how you're doing that," Ashley rushes out, chest tight. "But please, please don't stop."

"I wasn't intending to," Spencer breathes out, twisting her body around in the confined space.

Broom closet was closer than her office and the way Ashley was pressing into her right now, she really was grateful for the lack of extra space. She groaned with Ashley when she slipped another finger into her, feeling the brunette tighten almost painfully around them.

"God, you feel so…so…" Spencer gasps out, mouth pressed against Ashley's throat.

Ashley's hands move down from Spencer's shoulders, nails scratching lightly at a bare back. "Nice," she fills in, smiling slightly.

Spencer chuckles against her neck, lifting her head up blindly to capture unbelievably kissable lips. "Nice," she repeats, tugging on Ashley's bottom lip with her teeth as she thrusts harder, palm rubbing against the most sensitive of places and keeps on going until the spaces in between Ashley's gasps disappear altogether, until a moan and a brokenly whispered 'Spencer' trips forward from those unbelievably kissable lips.

Spencer holds her up, letting her ride out the waves of her orgasm before pressing forward again, fusing their lips together in a searing kiss.

Ashley smiles as she pulls back slightly, Spencer's hand still pressed most intimately against her. She moves her own hands down, pushing at Spencer's bottoms until they disappear somewhere on the floor. She smiles at the blonde, even as the other woman starts up a motion with her fingers again. "Let me show you what it is I know."

***O*O***

"About damn time," Kyla grumbles, finally back in their car. "What the hell took you so long?"

Ashley had the decency to blush and she steadfastly avoided Aiden's gaze. "Spencer was showing me some new techniques and stuff."

"I bet," Aiden snorted, putting the key into the ignition. He caught Ashley's gaze in the rearview mirror and she stuck her tongue out at him.

"Hey, so I was thinking," Kyla starts, completely oblivious as always. "I know you guys don't really like this thing, so if you don't want to come with me anymore, it's totally okay."

"Are you kidding me?" Ashley near shrieks, leaping forward from the backseat. "I love dance class. I just signed us up for two more weeks."

****Poker Face****

"How are the numbers looking in the northwest division, Glen?" Aiden asks the man, swiveling slightly in his desk chair.

They're all seated around the boardroom table, finishing up their weekly progress meeting. Aiden and Ashley as always sat at the head of the table, co-founders and CEO of your own business meant that their places were pretty much etched in stone.

Ashden Incorporated had been Aiden's brain-child at the time – a company dedicated to the development of safety techniques and practices that can be utilized in cars. Spurned from a high school friend, Chelsea, who lost a baby due to complications from a car accident, Aiden expressed his desire to help make cars even safer than they already were.

Of course, Aiden lacked the intellectual wherewithal to bring this to fruition so the grunt work was up to Ashley. The result: a company leading the field in safety procedures and techniques in all aspects of life, from sports and cars to hospitals and schools.

Glen, a friend of Aiden's from college - and of Ashley's through Aiden – straightened out his tie before opening the portfolio, highlighting profits and losses, suggesting where they stood to make the most gains and where they needed vast improvement. It's what he was paid the big bucks for and Ashley just clicked away at her Blackberry, reading the latest round of fanfiction from her favorite site.

"…all in all, we're showing considerable incline in the northwest division but we should still concentrate most of our marketing efforts there to keep that foothold going," Glen concluded, pushing up his glasses.

"Very well," Aiden stated, breathing deeply. "Johnson, I'd like that report on the new Omega helmet by Wednesday," he added, looking at the newest face on their panel.

"You got it boss," Johnson said, readying his materials with everyone else as they were dismissed with an "Enjoy the weekend" from Ashley.

Glen clicked off the projector and strode over to his two pals. "What's on tap for the evening boys?" he asks, loosening the tie it usually takes him minutes to put on.

Ashley groans, rolling her eyes at him. "How many times do I have to tell you I'm not a boy. I have boobs, guy."

"I know, but you're my boss and you're gay. In order to cope my mind's desexualized you. You're one of the fellas, now," Glen tells her, hiding a smile.

"If we weren't cool-"

"And what are you talking about what's on tap?" Aiden interrupts, tucking some files into his briefcase. "It's the last Friday of the month."

"Oh yeah, that's right. Poker night," Glen fills in, snapping his fingers. "Okay, well, I got the chips and dip."

"I'll bring the booze," Ashley adds, stretching out languidly in her chair. "Oh, and bring your brother Glen. I can always tell when he's bluffing."

Aidne laughs good-naturedly. "I'm sure Glen appreciates you telling him you plan on stealing his younger brother's money, Ash."

"Glen's cool. Aren't you Glen?"

"Frigid."

***O*O***

"And try not to embarrass me by squealing when you get a good hand. You never fool anybody then," Glen adds, on his way to the door.

But as he's opening it, it swings inward, a short blonde tumbling inside with bags hanging off of her.

"What the-"

"Surprise," the woman says sheepishly, brushing some of the long blonde hair out of her face.

"Hey, Spencer," Clay says, laughing slightly.

"Oh, what?" Glen groans, slightly pushing her back out the door. "No, man. No. Not tonight."

"C'mon, Glen. I don't feel like checking into some crappy hotel when I can bunk on your expensive sleeper sofa."

"Two reasons: I'm going out tonight so there is no way I can stay here and make sure you don't get into it with 'you know who'. And two: I really can't afford being seen bailing you two out of jail…again."

"She started it," Spencer deadpanned with a smirk, moving in Glen's way when he tried to close the door on her. "Okay, I'm sorry. I'll be good. Where's your…" Spencer swallowed thickly. "…better half, anyway?"

"She's upstairs…asleep. Oblivious to your arrival and I'd like to keep it that way," Glen tells her shortly, pushing again.

"Okay, okay. Look," Spencer says, holding up her hands in compliance. "I won't stay here. Just…take me with you."

"What?" Glen practically squeaks.

"Take me with you. You won't even notice I'm there."

"You don't even know where I'm going," Glen offers, knowing his little sister a little too well to just acquiesce.

Spencer shrugs. "Doesn't matter. Anything's better than a bedbug-ridden hotel or your wombat of a wife. Oooh, sorry."

"Yeah, yeah," Glen nods, shoving her out the door, but not before dumping her bags in his hallway. "As long as you behave yourself."

"Me? I'm a good girl."

***O*O***

"Oh, Glencoe," Aiden says, reaching over to shake the man's hand. "Got the guac?"

Glen holds out the tub of dip and the bag of chips. "Okay, bruh, slight amendment to the plans."

Aiden looks past him to Clay and the other woman standing right beside him. "No dates, dude."

"That's not my date. That's my sister," Glen says, notably chagrined. "That's sick man."

"Your sister?" Aiden says, face scrunching in confusion before his jaw drops. "What? No way. That's little Spencer with the braces. Puberty did her _well_."

"My _sister_ dude. Cut it out," Glen grumbled, face going red.

"I'm sorry," Aiden says, meaning it. "But, seriously dude, your sister's hot."

"Whose sister is hot?" Ashley asks, wrestling with a bottle of unopened beer.

Aiden plucks the bottle from her grasp, twisting the top off with ease. "Glen's."

"Freak," Ashley mutters, looking to the bottle as if it were mocking her. "Glen's got a sister?"

"Uh huh," Aiden nods, pointing to the vestibule where Spencer and Clay were checking out some of Aiden's photos from his world travels. "There she is."

Ashley lets her gaze travel up and down Spencer's form and she's suddenly cut off by the view of a fuming Glen. "Cut. It. Out."

"Aw, calm down, Carlin. I'm just looking," Ashley chuckles, pushing him aside teasingly. "You're such a Neanderthal protector brother."

"I'm the oldest," Glen reasons, shrugging lightly. "It's my job. Besides, I don't know why I'm bothering with you, Spencer's not gay."

"Score one for Dennison," Aiden jokes, opening up the double doors to the game room.

Glen bristles and Ashley giggles, handing him a beer.

"Hey Spence, these are my co-workers Aiden and Ashley," Glen says, pointing to them each in turn.

"We're his bosses," Aiden amends, handing the blonde a beer.

Glen rolls his eyes and snatches the beer back. "Watch it Dennison."

Spencer snatches the bottle back from him. "It's nice to meet you, Aiden," she says, smiling politely at the boy. "And you too Ashley," the blonde practically purrs and Ashley's eyes widen in surprise.

Glen's oblivious and just sits down, busting open the bag of chips but Aiden shares a look with Ashley, stepping up to her side and watching as Spencer slowly turns away, putting a little emphasis into her strut.

"Not gay?" he asks Ashley quietly, nudging her arm with his elbow.

Ashley raises an eyebrow. "Not exactly straight either."

***O*O***

This is boring.

That's all Spencer can seem to think.

So, yes, she knew that spending time with her brother and his poker buddies was going to be boring but she thought for sure she could have a little fun messing around with their heads a little. Flirting a little here and there to annoy Glen mostly and then shutting them down completely if they started coming on strong.

She'd hoped to peek over people's hands and make little comments about the cards they were holding to ruin the game.

Basically, do all the annoying things she did when she was younger.

It hadn't worked out quite like as planned.

Turns out these guys (and one girl) were playing for actual money so the fun and games with the cards had ended with the first cut of the deck.

And each and every one of the guys had been absolutely unreceptive to her casual flirtations, although she suspects that may have something to do with the way Glen sliced into the summer sausage they'd been munching on all evening.

It wasn't like it really mattered to her though. Not all that much.

"I'll fold," Ashley announced suddenly, putting down her cards. "I'm gonna go get a refill. Anybody else want one?"

All of the five other guys raised empty bottles of beer and Ashley rolled her eyes before rising to her feet.

"I'll help you," Spencer volunteered just as suddenly, following the brunette into the kitchen.

"Ashley, right?" Spencer asks, once they're all alone.

Ashley nods before reaching into the fridge and pulling out a few beers. She turns around to place them on the island only to find Spencer standing right in front of her.

The blonde's hands slide over her own, grasping the bottles. "I've got them," Spencer says softly, taking the beers from Ashley.

The brunette offers her a small smile before turning back to the fridge.

A hand on her side nearly makes her jump out of her skin but she doesn't. She only hits her head on a shelf in the fridge.

"I'm sorry," Spencer whispers, stepping back and Ashley pulls out of the refrigerator, rubbing her head.

"It's okay," Ashley mumbles out, wincing slightly.

Spencer smiles slowly. "Didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't scare me," Ashley assures her, bringing her hand back down. "I was just…surprised."

"Oh," Spencer states lamely, rolling her eyes and scuffing her toe on the tiled floor. "I'm not good at reading faces."

Ashley's eyebrow rises. "I can."

Spencer smirks. "Oh really?"

Ashley takes a measured step forward. "Oh yeah."

"Prove it."

***O*O***

"Okay," Spencer whispers, fingers scratching at a still-clothed back. "I believe you."

"Shh," Ashley whispers back, pumping her fingers harder and rubbing tight circles with her palm. "They're going to hear us."

They're in Aiden's guest bathroom, the blond perched upon a pedestal sink as Ashley seems intent on fucking her brains out. "I don't care," Spencer groans, eyes rolling in the back of her head as Ashley's lips attach to the pulse point on her neck. "Shit," she hisses, feeling teeth tug at sensitive skin.

"That face means 'fuck that feels good'," Ashley murmurs, her lips turning up slightly as Spencer pants heavily.

The blonde chuckles breathlessly, trailing her hands to the front of Ashley's shirt, pulling the button-down apart, buttons flying everywhere. She lifts a leg higher, curling it around Ashley's waist, encouraging the brunette to thrust harder and deeper. "Does it?"

Ashley lifts her head and watches the blonde bite her lip, cheeks flushed and breaths shallow. "And that face means 'I'm close'."

Spencer lets her hands work at Ashley's jeans, pulling down the zipper so that she has just enough space to slide it down the front of her underwear. "What does this face say?"

"Fuck," Ashley breathes out, eyes falling shut when Spencer's questing fingers meet with her core.

"Wow, you really _are_ good."

***O*O***

"What the hell took you so long?" Aiden asked, barely paying attention to her as she reclaimed her seat next to him.

"I spilled some beer on my shirt," Ashley answered, handing out the bottles.

"Yeah," Spencer said, taking her seat as well. "And I helped her find another one."

Aiden looked over at Ashley and noted that she was wearing his old UCLA gym shirt with a shrug, until he got a look at her face.

"Whatever," Glen said, grabbing a handful of chips. "Someone deal her in so I can work on getting some of my money back."

Aiden picks up his cards and leans over so that only Ashley can hear him. "Not straight at all is she?"

Ashley picks up her beer and lifts it in a silent toast to Spencer who does the same, small smile on both their faces.

"Queerer than a three dollar bill."


	49. You Don't Know My Name

**A/N:** Again, don't own. Just borrowing.

* * *

"Table six!" Aiden yells, slapping the bell and sitting the plate down.

Ashley hustles over, still scribbling the last of an order onto her notepad. "Thanks Aide," she says, grabbing the plate and walking over to the two gentlemen seated at the furthest booth.

"Here you go, fellas," she says, sitting down a plate of pancakes and eggs and a B.L.T. "Sorry about the wait."

"Oh, that's fine Miss," the one man says, tipping his hat. "The service makes it all the more enjoyable."

The other guy openly leers and Ashley barely suppresses an eye roll. "Let me know if you need anything else," she smiles, back away face first. If she turns around any sooner Mr. Max, the owner of this fine establishment, may have another lawsuit on his hands.

"We're out of decaf," Madison shouts into the kitchen, leaning over the wait counter. She watches as Ashley slides her way to her, face looking worn out already.

"Long night?" she asks, chuckling when Ashley just cast her a look.

"Who knew that night school would be so…draining?" Ashley whines, grabbing a rag and wiping down the counter in front of her.

"Uh, I did," Madison says, raising her hand teasingly. "But you're the one with the big dreams of getting out of this place. And I'm your best friend so that means encouraging you even when you're down and out."

"You don't seem to be encouraging me," Ashley deadpans, dropping her head onto the freshly-cleaned spot of counter.

"Oh, cheer up buttercup. Besides, look, your favorite patron just walked in," Madison nods, grabbing the full pot of decaffeinated coffee and preparing to leave out to the diner floor.

Ashley follows Madison's eyes and…squeaks before ducking down beneath the counter.

"Ashley, what the hell are you doing?"

"Take her order Madison."

"You know, you obviously like this girl. Why not just strike up a conversation with her like normal people. Instead of this quiet stalking thing you do every time. I mean, I'm sure she'd appreciate knowing that you make extra sure her coffee's always made fresh and to her liking. You know, one cream, two sugars."

"Two creams," Ashley corrects before blushing to the tips of her ears. "Okay, no. Madison, no. I _can't._ First of all, she's probably not even gay. And, secondly, look at her and look at me. She comes in here wearing suits and stuff and I'm rocking an apron and a hairnet."

"Self-deprecation is not your forte."

"Just take her order, please."

Madison smirks. "You already know her order."

"_Mads_."

"Okay, stop your whining. I'll go."

***O*O***

Ashley stays near the corner of the counter, a hiding spot of sorts and her ritualistic spot since about three months ago when she'd first noticed the other woman. She was everything Ashley'd ever desired in another person as far as looks were concerned and it didn't hurt that she appeared to be successful. But she always came in by herself – no friends, no family, no co-workers.

And she always ordered the same thing – a slice of toast with strawberry jam, one lightly scrambled egg, and a coffee.

But she'd never said a word to Ashley, which was mostly Ashley's fault, but really the woman seemed oblivious of things that were going on around her when she was here. She seemed completely intent to read her Wall Street Journal and just exist.

Didn't stop Ashley from staring though.

"Are you even breathing?" she hears a voice suddenly say directly into her ear and she was so intent in her staring that she nearly knocked the pie plate on the counter in front of her to the floor.

"Madison," she hissed quietly, steadying the plate and casting a quick glance over to the still inattentive blonde. "Cut it out."

"You cut it out. You're being very weird. Like, Amanda Seyfried in _Chloe_ weird."

"Okay, one: your taste in movies is really starting to make me question your sexuality and two: I am _so_ not there yet."

Madison laughs. "Funny how you added on the yet. And I won't say anything about my sexuality. But, I am dating Aiden, and we know he's just a girl without the boobs."

"What an effective beard," Ashley states, returning the smirk Madison bestows upon her.

"You have class tonight?"

"I have class _every _night," Ashley says, rolling her eyes.

"Okay, well, blow it off tonight. Just one night and I'm gonna get you out there so you can get little miss wall street out of your system. Or perhaps get you drunk enough that you actually grow a pair and actually speak to the girl."

"Why are you suddenly so interested in my love life?"

"Glee's on hiatus. I literally have, like, nothing better to do."

***O*O***

"Oh my God Madison, I am going to _kill_ you," Ashley groans, walking in to work the next day feeling like she'd been beaten…with a bat…a giant bat.

Madison had taken her to four bars last night. At least, that's what the girl tweeted this morning. In all honesty, she only remembered going to two and the second one only is apparent because of the two wristbands she woke up wearing.

"C'mon rook, lighten up," Madison says, pulling on her apron. "Can't tell me you didn't have fun," Madison smiles, then smiles wider when Ashley's own grin makes an appearance.

"It was nice," Ashley mutters, putting on her own uniform.

"What was that girl's name? Or do you even know?"

"I know her name," Ashley shoots back, a little maligned but then her faces breaks out into a confused frown. "Well, I knew her name last night. I _think_ I got her number."

Madison rolls her eyes, adjusting her hairnet. "Oh, you so obviously suck at this dating game. How do you ever get laid?"

"I literally get lucky."

"I bet," Madison answers, tucking her pen and ordering pad into her front apron pocket. "Hurry up and get ready. The morning rush'll be here soon."

"Can't wait," is Ashley's sarcastic reply.

***O*O***

"Oh my God," Ashley groans, coming back to pick up to more plates. "Is it just me or is this place more packed than usual?"

"It's just you," Madison deadpans, dropping a few dishes into the dirty dish bin. "I have to go to the washroom real quick. Cover for me."

"Madison," Ashley hisses, not amused. "Just hold it or something. There are too many people for me to handle by myself."

"You'll be fine. The rush has died down. Mostly people are just trying to wait out the rain," Madison rushes out, pushing past her to duck into the back of the restaurant where the employee's lounge was.

Ashley huffed and turned back to the diner floor, walking past patron after patron with a half-filled canteen of coffee asking if anyone needed a refill.

The door chimed once again and in filed the one patron that Ashley most certainly didn't want to see, especially looking as frazzled as she was.

The blonde woman shrugged her shoulders, a few raindrops falling off of her jacket as it had started to lightly rain outside and Ashley stood there dumbfounded as she brushed by her, making her way to her usual table.

She was only brought out of her trance by the woman in front of her speaking loudly. "You're spilling that coffee, hun."

Ashley looked down and sure enough the cup of coffee she was filling was about to overflow with the hot liquid.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," she rushed to say, grabbing a few napkins out of her apron and sopping up the excess liquid as best she could. "Let me get you another cup."

Her cheeks felt unbearably warm as she went back to the counter, taking her time and praying by some miracle that Madison would hurry the hell up.

She kept her eyes straight ahead when she passed by the woman's table and was surprised to feel a grip on her wrist. "When you finish up, I'd like to order please?" the blonde woman asked with a smile and those were the first words she'd ever spoken to Ashley.

Ashley felt herself smiling back dumbly, unmoving. Unfortunately, the blonde was expecting an answer however so her eyes just sparkled amusedly waiting on a response.

"Is that okay?" she finally asked and Ashley blinked.

"Okay?" she repeated, not sure what was happening and then she caught up. "Okay. Oh, yes. Yes. That's fine. I'll…be right with you."

"Great," the blonde said, letting go of her wrist and turning back to her paper.

Ashley let out the breath she was holding and marched onward, giving the woman's whose coffee she spilled a fresh cup.

Then she walked back over to the blonde, clearing her throat as she stood there awkwardly. "What can I do you for? I mean, what can I get you?" she rectified quickly, much to the blonde's amusement if she was paying any attention.

"Hey, I don't usually get you."

Ashley's eyebrows quirk. "Excuse me?"

"I don't usually get you. The other woman usually takes my order. Madison."

"Oh, well, yeah. She's, um, busy," Ashley starts, then suddenly realizes something. "Did you want her to wait on you or…"

"Oh no, you're fine. I was only saying it's kind of strange that I've been coming here for months now and I _never_ got waited on by your before. Isn't that kind of weird?"

Ashley swallows thickly. "Coincidence," she manages, shrugging slightly.

"I suppose," the blonde says, seemingly prepared to talk for a while. "So your name is…Ashley?" the blonde asks, peering intently at the stitching on Ashley's uniform.

Ashley can't help the flutter low in her stomach at hearing her name on the other woman's lips. "Yeah," she nods, fiddling with her order pad.

"It's cute. It suits you," the blonde says, looking down at her paper quickly. "Unlike _my_ name."

"What's your name?" Ashley asks, trying not to appear too eager, but even she can't help the instinctive way her body sways just a tad closer.

"Spencer," the blonde states flatly, eyes back on the other woman. "My folks thought I was going to be a boy. Apparently we had a severely inept obstetrician."

Ashley snorted and then rolled her eyes at herself, instantly embarrassed but Spencer only laughed. "You snorted."

"…Yeah," Ashley mumbles, scuffing her foot on the linoleum floor and averting her eyes.

"Don't be embarrassed," Spencer tells her, picking up the menu. "It's cute."

***O*O***

"Madison!"

The Latina jumps, turning around slowly with her shoulders still hunched around her ears.

"You did that on purpose," Ashley hisses, striding up to the girl and pointing a finger in her face.

Madison smirks a little. "You're welcome."

"I am going to kill you," Ashley grits out, eyes narrowed.

"No," Madison disagrees, grabbing a plate from Aiden. "You're going to thank me and go take this out to blondie out there. You're going to ask for her number and stop acting like a social retard."

She presses the plate of eggs and toast into Ashley's hands before pushing the girl out of the kitchen, standing in the way with her arms crossed when Ashley attempts to turn back around.

Spencer smiles brightly when Ashley finally comes back, food in hand.

"Here you are," she says, carefully setting the plate down. "Enjoy."

Before she can turn away however, Ashley's wrist is being held again. "When is your break?"


	50. The Impossible

**A/N:** Okay folks, after 49 chapters – 145,000plus words – 16,000 plus hits – 4,500 plus visitors and 512 reviews, it's finally time to wrap up this story and I think several thanks are in order so I'll kick it off like that.

Thank you to all the silent readers, thanks for taking time out of your life to read this little creative endeavor of mine. It is/was greatly appreciated.

Thanks to all the reviewers: xxMandyxx, Cyberbaby, zieky, herb88, xunderestimatedx, Lunarcycle, sandra, KTSA, YourMine.I'mYours., NASCAR, therap, VonKrapper, Lang1922, Sarah, taymm15, JMH&D, Life-Live-Love-Learn, SuperGirl06, Palexobsessed, spashley16, DreamsXReality, BrownieStick, ~me~, anonymous, sassyc, quinze85, Readforfun, magnetichurricanelove, tmacluver, LuisaHUAH, luvspashley13, insertcleveranswer(Erin!), palex 4 ever, JColaz, doubleclique, orgy123, SnowDuchess, krisana22, breadstickphonehome, The Real M. Vanichkul, Conscious, BuffyXena, naranga87, RM, wannabebo352, exist2believe, simple77, Ryoko05, Shiznuts, I'm Burnin' Up For You Baby, Sarai Nyx, SONrox, memma93, DreamCookie, IcAnTbReAtH29, McKie, awe, raspberryapplevitaminwater, tahja22, XxSonXXofXXaXBananaXx, epikkk, ..., Fumbling Toward Ecstasy, cookietme7, wxpblue, LoLo06, snrclass08, momo0424, McrFreak1991, Elly1212, ivegotsecrets2, theflannelclub, grangergirl22, Bgarduno, , 0bsessionXx, Big Fan, beautifulCYANIDE, Blaze Phoenix, P.A.M4Life, , stripper4life, iamthewalrus, sugarrush78, ilovemyself26, corky, ebonyedlove, , somthgIlike2do, sonfan92, I'.Forever, XxkoeyxX, SoNfan110, thismustbetheplace, Harley Quinn Davidson, Makiki, Jaredx03, SF4life, queenred12, ifyouarechilly, neverhappy10,MittNacht, lilce1992, Cassicio, Storylove, tigga123, Irishgrl33, TheBoondocksRox, mkylsmth, n, Brittany, theaceiscalling, kills70, nautic 187, and DaniZGE.

Super duper shout outs to, Momo The Great, arh1986, Sexyluv 07, hollymarie4, imaferrari, and slushhy because you guys constantly gave me encouraging words and stuck around for a _very _long time, even when I wasn't sure I was coming back. And a special thanks to dttdemon, SouthMGP91, mutt009, and Hotcuti3 for your _long_ and numerous reviews and feedback. It truly was essential in the continuation of this story.

Oh, and one more special thank you to DatSoNfan for the best review ever that literally made me laugh out loud:

"Hey other fanfiction writers, Imma let you finish, but MGMK is one of the best fanfiction writers of ALL TIME! *Kanye shrug*"

Thanks to all of you for sticking with me through the plagiarizers and the posers, lack of creativity and energy. For sticking around since way back when I thought 'PMS' was an insult. I'm gonna miss knowing how good a chapter was based on how many words KITTYKAT puts in a review, lol.

Last but not least, thanks to my current BETA for going over these past chapters including the massive (read: insane) last one. You are braver than me, lol.

Alright guys. Here goes…something.

Oh, p.s. For those of you that are into Glee, I'm writing a fic. Check it out if you'd like. And for those of you not into Glee, shame on you. No, seriously, go sit in a corner. Just kidding, but really, you should get into it. It's made out of awesome and would I lie to you? (please do not go by my promise to have this up by the end of the weekend)

***o*O*o***

**The Impossible: A Walk To Remember Reprise**

At eighty-two years of age Ashley can officially say that she's lived her life with no regrets.

An only child, she'd learned to love and let herself be loved.

She'd been successful in her academics and professional career, leading the field in cancer research, specifically leukemia in children and adolescent – a career decision she'd made in her teenage years after a chance encounter in a hospital ward. This same hospital ward that would later be named after a late friend of hers.

She'd married a wonderful man and had two beautiful children.

She was never more afraid of anything else than she was of admitting her bisexuality to her mother and father. They were always close, not the closest of course, but she could honestly say she'd never hidden anything from them. But when she finally did tell them, her mother merely smiled and wrapped her up in a huge hug. Her father was a bit more enthusiastic and offered to take her to a strip club. And yeah he may have been just a tad intoxicated at the time but she'd never felt more loved it seemed.

In the end she'd loved and lost, had girlfriends and boyfriends, and then one stuck and stuck hard.

Her husband, John, was a handsome man. Strapping and suave, strong yet gentle, he was her best friend, her lover, her confidant. He took her for everything that she was, the flaws and the nuances, and found perfection in them all and one of the happiest days in her life was the day they finally said 'I do'.

There were more happy days to follow: the birth of her son, John Junior, and then her doppelganger, Amy. Both children were model replicas of their parents, all the way down to their personalities. They had their father's charm and wit and the fire of their mother's will in their hearts. The world would have a lot on its hands with those two. There were birthdays and graduations and first words and first steps, not necessarily in that order though.

And there were sad days too: funerals for her parents. They were always inexplicably together; an odd pairing to say the least even down to their professions; her being an oncologist and him being a musician. But in spite of their differences, it was very true that they loved one another. And even in death, it was certain that they'd be together because when her father left this world, her mother followed not two days after.

When John died, she'd thought it'd be the end of her. And her children did too, spending at least a month checking in on her every hour of the day but it wasn't her time.

Somehow, she knew.

There was even that one early summer day, so very many years ago, and a girl with sapphire eyes…

She'd loved John, she really had, but part of her heart – perhaps the biggest part – was somewhere in the sky, held gently in the hands of a teenage girl not meant for this world. It brought a smile to Ashley's face when she thought about how Spencer would hardly recognize her if she saw her now. She'd never gotten over the girl, kept her in her heart always. Not excluding love when it came her way, but never forgetting.

Always remembering.

Sitting on her front porch and staring out at the sunset, she wondered just what the world had left for her and, as the images around her started to blur, she wasn't afraid.

She could almost see her, blonde hair whipping around her face in the light breeze, blue eyes brighter than the bluest ocean waters.

And she wonders if in every other universe, every Ashley is finding her Spencer.

***o*O*o***

**When You Look Me In The Eyes**

"Dr. Davies office," the receptionist answers distractedly, shuffling a stack of papers.

Spencer lazily twirls the cord of her office phone with her finger, barely concealing her grin. "May I speak with Dr. Davies, please?"

The receptionist huffs haughtily, rolling her eyes slightly. "May I ask who's calling?"

"Spencer Carlin," Spencer replies, even though she knows good and well that _Rebecca_ knows exactly who the hell she is. She's only called Ashley almost every day for a month now.

"Hold please," Rebecca replies, pressing the hold button before she gets a reply. She punches in the numbers for Ashley's extension and waits a few seconds.

"Ashley."

"Miss Carlin is on line two for you Dr. Davies," Rebecca says, inspecting her nails.

Ashley smiles and then frowns. "Call me Ashley, Rebecca. And patch her through."

"Okay, Dr. Davies."

Ashley shakes her head but smiles when her office phone rings. "Dr. Davies speaking," she answers after the second ring.

"Why, hello Doctor."

"Spencer Carlin, is that you?"

"Right you are."

"What can I do you for?"

"Um…probably a night out at Danillo's," Spencer answers, chuckling immediately after.

"Nice," Ashley acknowledges, relaxing back in her chair. "Seriously, babe, what's up?"

"Nothing…really," Spencer answers, swiveling her own office chair back and forth. "I just really wanted to hear your voice. Oh, and FYI, I think your receptionist hates me."

Ashley chuckles. "She doesn't hate you. She's just being difficult lately. I think the boyfriend messed up again."

"SO glad I don't have to deal with that."

"Don't like guys?"

"Not really, no."

"Well done."

"I'll say."

Ashley's phone beeps and she sees its one of her colleagues, Dr. Collins inept self to be exact so more than likely she was going to have to cut this call short. She sighs.

"Man, Spence, I gotta go. Collins probably poked some poor patient's eye out. We're still on for dinner tonight?"

"Of course," Spencer says, sitting up straighter in her car.

"Great," Ashley smiles, still hesitant to go. "I'll pick you up at eight."

"Can't wait," Spencer grins, clicking her pen over and over again.

"Bye," Ashley says, still holding onto the phone.

"Bye," Spencer says, smiling dreamily. "I love you."

Ashley's smile freezes on her face and she's fairly certain her heart just stopped.

Spencer can't hear breathing anymore but looking at her phone she sees she's still connected. "Ashley?"

Ashley blinks a few times, just trying to breathe, and then the smile starts to bloom, slowly growing until it's splitting her face in half.

"I love you too."

***o*O*o***

**Recital Romance**

Justin takes off as soon as she parks the car, not even waiting until she kills the ignition.

"C'mon Aunt Ashley!" the young boy yells, already at the swings.

Spencer's standing there, occasionally giving Mia a push as they girl half-heartedly pumps her legs.

"Hi," Ashley grins, jogging up to the duo.

"Hey," Spencer replies, tilting her head. "You guys made it."

"Yeah, almost didn't. This guy and his Spongebob," Ashley says, jerking a thumb toward her nephew.

"It was a _new_ one," Justin protests, pumping himself like a big boy should.

Mia snickers and pumps higher, trying to keep up with the boy.

"I betcha I can go higher than you," Justin challenges, kicking his legs emphatically.

"Nuh uh," Mia tells him, swinging with vigor.

Ashley and Spencer share a smile and walk away from the kids, moving just adjacent to them to the see saws.

Spencer turns to Ashley, amusement dancing in her eyes. "When is the last time you were on one of these?" she asks, hand sliding over one of the padded seats.

"I think I was twelve. And I think Brian Harlow was banging on the other end, sending this hard plastic seat here into my chin," Ashley deadpans.

Spencer's eyes widen. "Oh my God, really?"

"Yeah," Ashley nods, raising her head. "I still have the scar, see?"

Spencer stoops down a little, instinctively reaching her fingers out to trace over the slightly discolored skin. "I see," she says softly.

Ashley's eyes meet blue and they're getting a little caught up in one another.

"You are…" Ashley stammers and then shakes her head at herself, smiling slightly.

"What?" Spencer asks, her lips turning up at the corners.

"You're really pretty," Ashley just says, like it's an everyday thing. "Beautiful actually."

Spencer's face goes red and she drops her eyes shyly before meeting Ashley's gaze. "Thanks."

***o*O*o***

**The Luv Boat**

"I don't think I can do this Spencer," Ashley mutters, feeling all kinds of trepidation walking up the front steps.

It was bad enough that she was doing this, but she was out of her element in more ways than one. She was never the type of woman to 'meet the folks' so to speak. And technically, she'd already met Spencer's parents but at the time she was fairly certain they had no idea she had just slept with their daughter (if the way they were throwing Aiden at Spencer was any indication). But here she was, on dry land, prepared to walk into these people's home and formally introduce herself as Captain Davies, Spencer's girlfriend.

What was she, crazy?

"Don't be ridiculous, Ashley," Spencer says, brushing her hands on Ashley's shoulders in a nervous gesture to remove non-existent lint. "They're going to love you. They already do. Now, me on the other hand…"

"What are you talking about?" Ashley asks her softly, taking the other woman's hands. "Your parents love you."

"I know they do," Spencer says, sighing lightly. "I also know that when they imagined their little girl growing up and being in a relationship, the person they envisioned her being with didn't have boobs."

Ashley chuckled against her better judgment. "Maybe so, but I'm sure that, given what I've seen of them and everything you've said, regardless of who I may or may not be, they'll love you regardless and be happy for you as long as you're happy. And you are happy, right?"

"Never been happier," Spencer says with a smile, leaning in to press her lips softly against the brunette's.

***o*O*o***

**But I Don't Know Her**

"Hang on, hang on," the young girl asks, waving her hands in the air. "Are you telling me that you two met on a blind date?"

Ashley smiled at their daughter and nodded slightly, her hand squeezing her wife's gently.

"A blind date Uncle Glen orchestrated?"

"Yep," Spencer replies, chuckling at the incredulous look the little girl was giving. At nine years old, she had that Ashley-bewildered look down.

"That's crazy," the girl says, turning through the photo album again, not even jumping when her uncle covers her ears.

"You know what's even crazier," Glen says, smirking at the pair. "Hooking up with your blind date the night before you meet them and then going for round two at my boss's party."

Spencer's ears turn red and she instantly faces Ashley, wondering just when her wife decided to spill that long-kept secret.

Ashley for her part stands up quickly, looking around the room. "Who could go for a Klondike bar?"

***o*O*o***

**Me Ashley. You Spencer.**

**It was a hot day in the jungle.**

"Ashley?" Spencer questions, peering out of the tree house onto the jungle floor. "Ash?"

Suddenly Ashley's in her face, hanging upside down from a vine. "Hi," she says brightly, hair falling into her face.

Spencer laughs, startled and amused. "Hi. What are you doing out there?"

"Went out. Got you present," Ashley says in her broken, yet improving, English.

"Oh yeah?" Spencer asks, reaching out to tug the girl inside, or attempt to.

**Ashley was still a lot stronger than her.**

"Only a little," Spencer says aloud.

**Oh please.**

"God, why don't you just shut up? Don't you have something else to do?"

**Unfortunately, no.**

Spencer rolls her eyes and gets back to Ashley. "What did you get me?"

Ashley swings inside the window and lands easily on her two bare feet, standing right in front of the blonde. "Here present," she smiles, fisting a bunch of wildflowers.

Spencer smiles and takes the bouquet from Ashley, cradling it in her arms before reaching for the brunette. "Thank you," she whispers with a grin, pulling her close.

Ashley wraps her arms around Spencer, dragging them both down to the floor. She pulls something else from behind her back, grasping it tightly between her two fingers. She grabs Spencer's hand and meets the blonde's blue eyes, face uncertain.

"Mine?" she asks, slipping a small band of interwoven grass and vine onto her finger. It's the wrong one but Spencer gets it.

"Yours," she says, feeling a lump growing in her throat as she leans in and presses her lips to the brunette's.

**Awww, isn't that cute.**

"Shut up!" the both yell.

***o*O*o***

**Sleepless in the Big Apple**

_Knock Knock Knock_

Spencer opens her door and Ashley rushes in, speaking before Spencer can even really figure out who it is.

"So I was trying to figure out what would be an appropriate gift to give my girlfriend for our first Valentine's Day and I know we said we weren't really going to do anything because the holiday is so commercial and blah blah blah but I couldn't resist because you're just so awesome and I really kinda love you."

"Okay, hi," Spencer says, smiling at her rambling other half. "Now what are you going on about?"

Ashley smiles and takes a deep breath, holding out a small carefully wrapped package. "Here. Happy Valentine's Day."

Spencer squeals excitedly because even though she knew they had decided on a no gifts policy, she secretly hoped that Ashley would totally dismiss that rule. She opens the small box and pulls out a small key.

"It's to my place," Ashley explains, eyes roaming about anxiously. "You don't have to say yes or anything but I was kind of hoping that my place could become our place. Because, okay, so I know you _really_ love your apartment with its occasionally warm water and the 'L' train earthquakes but I was wondering if maybe you wanted to move in with me. You're there all the time anyway and I've gotten used to seeing your stuff around and having you around and I really hope that you'll say yes. But even if you don't you can keep the key. It only cost me like two bucks max so no loss there. Or you can _not_ keep it and I can just take it back to Home Depot and tell them it didn't work I guess-"

"Ashley," Spencer laughingly interrupts, tugging on the brunette's shirt. "Calm down. I said yes like ten minutes ago."

Ashley blinks. "What?"

Spencer just nods, smiling brightly and then full on guffawing when Ashley hoists her up in the air, arms wrapped around her. "Oh my God," Ashley whispers, pulling back just enough to brush her lips against the blonde's. "I love you."

"Ditto."

***o*O*o***

**At Stake**

"This could very well end up sucking. You do realize that, right?" Spencer asks the other girl, well, 142-year-old woman actually. But hey, she still looked like a teenager so…girl.

Ashley smiled, her arms still wrapped around the blonde. They were sitting in a tree, out on a limb (and wasn't that accurate). She was propped up against the tree trunk, her back resting against it comfortably and Spencer's back was pressed into her front, snuggling deeper as the night wore on. "No pun intended, right?" she joked, squeezing the girl teasingly.

Spencer groaned and attempted to sit up, not entirely amused.

"Okay, okay," Ashley relented, holding on tighter. "I'm sorry but you left the door wide open," she says, leaning her head down to press her chin against Spencer's shoulder. "I get what you're saying, but this…" Ashley whispers, her lips ghosting over the other girl's ear. "…it's worth it, don't you think?"

Spencer turns around suddenly, her hands cradling the brunette's face. "I…don't know," she finally says, her hands moving down slowly to press against Ashley's chest.

She doesn't feel a heartbeat.

Ashley's frown matches her own.

She knows what the blonde is thinking.

"It may not beat, but I still feel, Spencer. I feel something for you," Ashley whispers, face serious.

Spencer's eyes drop, her eyes on her own hands moving back up to Aslhey's face. She traces her pinky over a bottom lip.

Ashley's practiced breaths get shallow and her chest heaves pointlessly.

Spencer's eyes finally land on her own and the blonde bites her lip, anxious. "Can you even love me?"

Ashley's own eyes widen and she would swear, on her life if it was still hers to give, that she felt her heart thud in her chest.

It was only for a second but she felt that lub-dub bang against her ribs voraciously.

"I think I already do."

***o*O*o***

**Soccer Field Charades**

Ashley stares down her opposition, kicking the soccer ball from her right foot to her left, sizing the other girl up.

Spencer's eyes are focused, she's watching the ball and watching Ashley's shoulders, side to side and just waiting.

Quick as lighting, Ashley presses forward, sprinting ahead and heading for the soccer goal, arm fighting with Spencer the entire way.

She dribbles hard left and then kicks it back right, Spencer right with her.

They were evenly matched as always and neither would give the other ground.

Ashley stopped suddenly, a hesitation dribble and it gave her the advantage she needed, ripping the ball past a slightly off-kilter Spencer and into the open mouth of the goal.

"Woot!" Ashley yelled, doing a quick back flip. "You got owned Carlin."

"Shut it, Davies," Spencer grumbled, dejectedly blowing blonde hair out of her face.

"That ankle still slowing you down?" Ashley asks, teasingly swatting the other girl on the butt.

"I'm serious, Ashley. Cut it out," Spencer warns.

"Or what, huh?" Ashley asks, stepping closer to the blonde.

Spencer's flushed face flushes harder and her eyes narrow to nearly slits. "That's it," she mutters, grabbing a fistful of Ashley's jersey and kissing her with gusto.

Ashley complies readily, and they stumble around Spencer's backyard, legs tangling and sending them both roughly to the ground, Spencer landing on top of Ashley.

The brunette's hands slide down Spencer's body, resting along the back of her bare thighs and Spencer grips Ashley's head, her blunt nails scratching lightly at her scalp until Ashley hisses in pleasure.

Then just as suddenly, Spencer pulls away, wiping the back of her hand across her mouth.

It takes Ashley a moment to open her eyes but when she does she sees Spencer standing over her, smiling with glittering eyes. "Now," the blonde asks, clearing her throat lightly and wearing a smug grin. "Who owned who?"

***o*O*o***

**I Smell A Rat**

So yeah, Spencer's kind of feeling like a bad ass.

Or she was.

At the Chuckee Cheese the other day she was a total badass.

Standing up to the little ankle-biters on behalf of the giant rat, who ended up being a girl, a girl she eventually asked out so yeah, all of that was totally badass.

But then she realized that asking her out meant taking her out and what the hell does Spencer know about dating a girl?

Answer: absolutely nothing.

She was surprised she even still knew how to walk what with how many dragons were flapping around in her stomach and no she did not misspeak, they were dragons. Several fire breathing dragons and they were about to make her throw up.

But hopefully not on whoever answers the doorbell.

The front door cracks open and a boy about her age answers it, smiling immediately after. "Sup?"

She almost barfs. Literally. But then she rolls her eyes at herself and squeaks.

Not much better actually.

"Is Ashley here?" she asks, hands wringing together anxiously.

"Yeah," the boy smiles, leaning against the door jamb. "Who wants to know?"

Spencer's quite torn because, well, this boy is obviously very cute and obviously trying to hit on her and she obviously had only ever been attracted to guys up to this point anyway so it would be kind of okay if she just blew off the Ashley date thing and hung out with this boy, right?

Right?

"Jake, who is it?" she hears called from inside.

"Some pretty girl," Jake, she now knows, answers, flashing a grin in her direction.

She flushes deeply.

"Spencer?" the same voice asks and Jake just raises an eyebrow, silently questioning.

Spencer nods, word beyond her for the moment.

"Yup," Jake calls back behind him, crossing his arms.

Spencer feels just a tad uncomfortable under his gaze but she tries her darnedest not to let it show, but then the door swings open wider and she sees Ashley.

Correction: some model girl who sounds like Ashley and kind of looks like her but is obviously not her because she's gorgeous.

"Hey," Ashley greets with a smile. "I see you met my brother, Jacob. He's just leaving."

"No, I'm not," Jake states, smirking at his sister.

"Yes, you were. Get lost," Ashley returns, hooking a thumb over her shoulder.

The boy rolls his eyes but eventually walks back into the house, his interest obviously fleeting.

"Sorry about that. He can't really contain his hormones around pretty girls," Ashley flirts, stepping out of the house. "So, where are we going?"

"Ashley?" Spencer finally manages, speaking for the first time since the brunette showed up.

"Yeah," Ashley answers, looking confused.

"Oh my God," Spencer whispers, looking the girl up from head to toe. "You look gorgeous," she can't help saying, truly marveling.

Ashley chuckles good-naturedly. "Well, anything's an improvement over a big fat gray rat suit."

Spencer blinks and then laughs a minute, the result of the joke getting to her brain late as well as the nervous energy she was harboring. "That's true but you still look…great."

"Thanks," Ashley grins, crinkling her nose. "So do you."

Spencer finally smiles, feeling a bit more at ease than she had been for most of the night. She holds out her hand, squeezing once when she laces her fingers through the other girl's. "Shall we?"

***o*O*o***

**Mrs. and Mrs. Smith**

Ashley sat down at the kitchen table, reading her newspaper and Spencer grabbed a canteen of orange juice, pouring them each a glass full.

She sits opposite her wife and butters her toast before casually popping a slice of strawberry into her mouth.

"They've got paint on sale at The Home Depot this weekend," Ashley offers, not looking up from the newsprint. "Maybe we can finally pick out a color for the downstairs guest room."

"I've picked out a color already," Spencer says, spooning some oatmeal.

"And I said we were painting that room sunshine over my dead body," Ashley replies, looking up to catch Spencer's eye.

The blonde smiles lovingly. "That can be arranged."

Ashley rolls her eyes and reaches for her glass of juice, nearly taking a sip before her nose picks up on a whiff os something.

Spencer's about to take a sip out of her glass but Ashley kicks their kitchen table, sending the edge harshly into Spencer's midsection and the glass of juice flying.

"What the hell, Ashley?" Spencer yells, affronted.

"There's something in the juice," Ashley tells her, getting up to check the canteen. It's tainted too. "Someone's been in here," she whispers, looking around.

"Someone's still in here," Spencer says, eyes widening at the red dot right between Ashley's eyebrows before she dives across the room, knocking them both to the floor, a slew of bullets following in her wake.

The both move for the kitchen table, turning it onto its side for cover as well as removing the twin semi-automatic rifles they kept stashed under there.

"How many?" Ashley asks, going into full assassin mode. Although, typically she wasn't on the receiving end of the violence.

"Two," Spencer answers, thinking. She reaches across the floor and grabs a small saucer up into the air, watching with fury as it gets decimated by bullets.

"Four," she corrects, smartly estimating the bullet's trajectory. "Two outside near the garage. One upstairs and one out front on Ted's lawn."

"Shit," Ashley curses, wincing slightly. "Elena's going to be pissed."

"Who the hell cares about Elena?"

"She's always complaining about people walking on their lawn," Ashley explains rather pointlessly.

Spencer leans over to kiss her quickly. "Look, I love that you react so calmly in life or death situations but there are four very well trained assassins right outside our house trying to kill us. I'm going to need you to have a little perspective here."

Ashley smirks at her, loading up the rifle and taking aim at one of their cooking pots handing on the pot rack.

The bullet bounces off the utensil and sails somewhere out of the back window, a low moan sounding shortly thereafter.

"Three well-trained assassins," Ashley says with a grin.

***o*O*o***

**Are You Afraid of the Dark?**

The little heads were all staring up at her, watching intently as she read aloud from _Corduroy Gets A Pocket_, a timeless classic of she must say so herself.

And say so herself she must because she'd bet money that most of these kids couldn't even talk yet.

But…that's the price you pay when your girlfriend works at the library and you enjoy looking at her face as much as humanly possible, even if that means enduring snotty offspring and whining babies. Oh, and the occasional kid or two.

Ashley smiles when Spencer's eyes light up, getting to one of her favorite parts and the little kids lean forward even more, drawn to her.

The blonde catches her eye quickly, the mirth hidden just underneath confirming that Ashley's little impromptu visit to Spencer's scheduled weekend reading would not go unrewarded.

Ashley was one very lucky girl.

See, kids?

Reading is fundamental.

***o*O*o***

**Diamond In The Rough**

"I feel kind of bad watching this," Spencer murmurs, still curled up into Ashley's chest, snuggling in front of the television.

"You didn't leave him at the altar, Spence," Ashley replies, squeezing her tighter.

"Almost," Spencer continues, shrugging slightly. "I feel like a bad person."

"Trust me. It would have been much worse if you'd married him and everything even though you knew he wasn't what you wanted," Ashley assures her girlfriend, stroking her hair lightly.

"Yeah. You're right," Spencer relents, shifting a leg over both of Ashley's, mounting her. "'Cause it turns out I'm pretty gay."

Ashley snorts, laughing against the lips suddenly pressed to hers.

***o*O*o***

**A Soldier's Story**

Ashley watched the scene on the television unfold with a tear in her eye. President Obama signing into legislation the repeal of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."

"…a good day. It's a real good day! This is a long time in coming, but I'm glad it's here…"

Spencer walks in from the kitchen, still wiping her hands on a dry cloth. "Is it official yet?"

Ashley nods and holds out her arms, waiting until Spencer clamors onto her lap.

"How do you feel?" Spencer asks her, letting her head drop onto a strong shoulder.

"Like I finally belong," Ashley whispers back, her chest tight.

Spencer shifts slightly, ghosting a hand over the brunette's face. "You've always belonged Ash. You belong to me."

***o*O*o***

**Compliments to the Chef**

"Do you actually want me to get fat?" Ashley asks her, patting on her stuffed stomach. "Because that's what you're gonna do if you keep feeding me like this."

Spencer smiles and takes the plates off the table, tossing them into the dishwasher. "What's the point of cooking if you can't do it for the ones you love?"

Ashley catches her around the waist as she tries to walk past and pulls her into her lap and Spencer lands a little too solidly, forcing a burp deep from Ashley's chest.

"That was attractive," Spencer snorts, giggling at Ashley's blush.

"Shut up," Ashley murmurs back, tugging the blonde down for a kiss that's much too tame for the brunette's liking.

"You know," Spencer starts, placing little chaste kisses on Ashley's mouth and chin and nose and cheeks. "There's a reason I feed you so well."

"I knew it," Ashley gasps mockingly, leaning back a little. "You do want me fat."

"Close. I just want to help you burn off the excess calories," Spencer grins, leaning down and placing an incendiary kiss on the brunette's mouth, one that foretold of an evening of "special-cardio".

Good times.

***o*O*o***

**I Saved Your, Um, Cat**

"Your cat's a pervert," Ashley tells her, once they're finally sated to the point of exhaustion.

"No she's not," Spencer mumbles, barely aware of speaking.

"Yes she is," Ashley insists. "She was staring at us the entire time we were…you know," she gestures lamely, suddenly shy, which was ridiculous considering they were both pretty much naked.

"No she isn't. She just stares a lot. It's what cats do. They stare," Spencer informs her, turning into the brunette and opening her eyes lazily. "Hi," she smiles.

"Hi," Ashley smiles back. "Is it okay that I pretty much don't want to leave this bed right now?"

"No, that's fine," Spencer tells her before frowning slightly. "Wait, is it because of me or because of the bed."

"Well, now that you mention it, this bed is kind of nice," Ashley bounces a little for emphasis.

"Jerk," Spencer scoffs, smacking her lightly on the forehead and pouting playfully, even as Ashley reaches to pull her closer.

"I'm kidding," the brunette mumbles, feeling her heart rate pick up again. "I'm way too tired to have sex, again. Can I just hold you?"

Spencer smiles softly. "You don't have to ask."

A beat.

"Spencer?"

"Hmm?"

"Who in the hell names their cat Pussy?"

***o*O*o***

**Ho and Tell**

Spencer pulled open the hotel room door, slowly easing out her cart and then stepping out behind it only managing a few paces before being pulled back into room 716.

Ashley tugged her back inside, pressing her back up against the closed door, lips and tongues and teeth all pressing together intimately.

"Ashley," the blonde giggled, matching her aggression. "I'm going to get in trouble."

"I'm sorry, what is it you're saying? You want me?" Ashley whispers out, her hands grasping at the material of Spencer's uniform.

"I do," Spencer assures her, momentarily losing her concentration when Ashley's lips attack her neck. "But, but, I gotta finish up the rest of my rounds. Or pretty soon they'll send hotel security after me, thinking some old dirty pervert's got me."

"Well, I'm not old or dirty. The pervert thing might not be too much of a stretch though," Ashley smiled, pulling back slowly.

Spencer grinned back, tilting her head slightly.

"Do you want to see me again?" Ashley asks her, feeling just a bit nervous, even after the times they'd just shared nothing was ever set in stone.

Spencer's smile falters just a tad. "That's not exactly up to me. I live here and more than likely, you're just passing through."

"That's true," Ashley nods, conceding the point. "But you could still answer the question."

"I…"Spencer starts, and then closes her mouth, not wanting to open herself up to rejection. She wasn't really this person; this random hook-up person.

"Because I really want to see you again," Ashley's quick to say, cutting into Spencer's less than appealing thoughts. "And not just for the sex either, even though the sex was pretty damn good."

Spencer lifts a teasing eyebrow. "Only good?"

Ashley smiles. "You know what I mean."

"I'd really like to see you for non-sex too, Ashley," the blonde replies, bringing her palms up to hold Ashley's face.

"Good."

***o*O*o***

**The Web We Weave**

"Are you sure you're ready to do this?" Ashley asks her and Spencer stops to actually think about it.

She was never the type of girl to be sure of anything. She only felt when things were good and when things were bad.

And right now, things were very good.

She smiled up at the girl and nodded, swallowing down her nerves as Ashley shifted underneath the sheets, removing that final barrier between their bodies so that there were pressed warm flesh against warm flesh.

Spencer gasped, feeling the other girl's arousal on her thigh and she watched as Ashley bit her lip, trying and subsequently failing to hold back a moan.

"I…I don't really know what to do," Spencer told the other girl, looking away for a barely discernable moment.

Ashley smiled, leaning down to trail her nose over Spencer's briefly, bringing the girl's attention back to her. "Don't you worry about that, Spencer. I'll take care of you."

***o*O*o***

**Sk8r Girl**

Kerri was looking at her strangely again.

"What Ker?"

"I still can't believe you're going out with that freak? And I'm not referring to her as a freak in the 'Ew, she's a gay girl' way. I mean it in the 'Ew, she likes riding around on skateboards in the sun all day and still never gets a decent tan' way."

"Well, that makes it so much better doesn't it," Ashley deadpanned, closing her locker. "Leave it alone. I like her okay? And yeah, I'm a little freaked out that I like this girl more than I've liked any of my past boyfriends combined and yes we are like, polar opposites, but she gets me as clichéd as that may sound and I get her."

Kerri just shrugged disinterestedly because teenagers are just fickle like that. "Is she coming to watch you cheer at the game?"

Ashley shrugged, biting her lip with sudden nerves. "I asked her," she mumbled with a shy smile. "I've never been so anxious to have someone see me cheer before."

Kerri cannot help the smile that blossomed on her face. "Oh my God, you are just so into this girl. It'd actually be pretty adorable if I thought she wasn't a creature of the night."

Ashley groaned, rolling her eyes. "Shut up Kerri."

"Aww, that's no way to talk to your friends," Ashley heard her say a second before her books were plucked out of her hands.

"Hey," she smiled, bumping into Spencer companionably.

"Hi," Spencer echoed, only having eyes for Ashley.

"Oookay, then," Kerri said, rolling her eyes at the thunderstruck duo. They were off in a different world somewhere. "See you two at the game."

Spencer's smile widened. "The guys gave me a lot of crap for actually voluntarily going to a Cobras game."

"Yeah, I can see Shane and Bucky totally flipping their shit," Ashley laughed, tangling her hand with the blonde's. "But, that's what you do when your girlfriend's on the cheerleading squad."

"Unfortunately," Spencer playfully sighed, looking aloof.

"You're such a goof," Ashley giggled, kissing her on the cheek.

***o*O*o***

**W-SPSH**

"Ashley…Ashley over here!"

The brunette turns to the reporter, stepping between the massive throngs of bodies to get his camera aimed directly in her direction.

She decides to throw the guy a bone.

"Ashley, quick question, is it true that you're dating that Radio DJ you hit on on air?"

Ashley smiles. "It's true."

"How's that going?"

"It's going pretty well, guy. It's going pretty well," she says, looking directly into the camera with a cryptic smile.

Back home Spencer's sitting on the couch, watching the brunette move seamlessly down the red carpet. After her first time attending one of those events and going through the hassle of getting all dressed and made up, Spencer decided that she was perfectly content sitting at home on the sofa with a beer and a bag of chips, relaxing on the chaise lounge while wearing her 'When Do I Get To Vote On Your Marriage' t-shirt.

She smiles at the look she knows Ashley's directing at her and she can't believe that even in this short expanse of time, she's felt so much for the brunette. But she has and that's why last night – after they'd made love, and she was lying there semi-conscious in the afterglow and wondering why it was she really wanted a cigarette – when Ashley had reached over into the nightstand, pulling out an object and casually slipping the small band around her left ring finger, Spencer squealed in delight and jumped on top of the girl, hugging her close and murmuring yes over and over again.

***o*O*o***

**Skin Deep**

The last of the bandages had finally been removed a week ago, and while Spencer still had substantial scarring on her face – some that would never completely heal – she'd been learning to cope with it better.

And that had a lot to do with the girl sitting just in front of her right now, trying her hardest (and being quite successful) in imitating Quagmire from _Family Guy_.

"Giggidy, Gig-gi-dy," Ashley carries on, strutting in front of Spencer's bed.

They were in her bedroom, enjoying a lazy Saturday in front of the television and under the covers.

"You're so ridiculous," Spencer laughs, doubling over again and Ashley climbed back onto the bed, crawling onto her lap.

"I think that was a compliment," the brunette smiles, settling comfortably on her knees, gently distributing her weight so as to not squish Spencer.

The blonde smiled up at her, running her hands over hips and grasping onto her thighs. "Gimme a kiss."

"But you're waaay down there," Ashley teased, wiggling a bit.

Spencer reaches up and grasps a fistful of shirt, pulling Ashley down. "You were saying?" she whispers against the brunette's lips.

"Never mind," Ashley whispers back, sealing their lips together.

***o*O*o***

**Red & Blue**

Ashley pops the clutch and the car jumps up on its front wheels. She shifts again and it tilts to its left.

Macro whoops, running up to the passenger side of the car. "Oh man, you finally finished her," he yelled, jumping headfirst into the back seat.

Spencer laughs and Ashley turns around to punch him in the thigh. "Watch the upholstery jerk off. I just got it cleaned."

Marco sits up, bouncing around on the plush interior. "How's the sounds?"

Ashley shares a look with Spencer before clicking on the radio, the trunk rattling with the bass instantaneously, garnering the attention of several of the kids on the block.

They all waved their hands and yelled, jamming along to the music.

"Oh shiznit," Marco practically squeals. "She got the boom like a 808."

"Your friend's got some serious issues," Ashley informs the blonde, reaching over the gearshift to wind their hands together.

"Now that we're dating, isn't he kind of your friend too?"

***o*O*o***

**Ten Items or Less**

"Mom, Dad, I'd like you meet Ashley," Spencer says, hand at the small of her back as she presents her like she's brandishing a bouquet of flowers.

"She's my girlfriend," Aiden adds, smiling brightly.

Paula and Arthur look to Spencer utterly confused and she rolls her eyes at the boy even though she knew he'd only done that to make her less nervous. "He's not serious. Ashley's actually…she's uh, my girlfriend," Spencer stutters feeling her cheeks burn.

Ashley just rocks into her, her lips upturned in a small smile.

Arthur grins and Paula's eyebrows shoot up to her hairline, but she mostly looks amused too. "Well, Ashley, it's nice to meet you," she says, holding out a hand to the girl which the brunette politely takes into her own.

"It's nice to meet you to Mrs. Carlin, Mr. Carlin," she adds on, holding out a hand to the man.

Guess she missed the memo on Arthur being a hugger.

Spencer barely suppresses a giggle at Ashley's surprised face when the older man wraps her up in a huge bear hug. "Welcome to the family Ashley."

Glen comes clamoring down the stairs then and mock punches Aiden in the gut, like he's used to. "Hey Spazz and Spazz's friend. Who's the hottie?" he asks, eyeing Ashley slightly and taking a sip of his soda.

"Glen," Paula admonishes lightly. "Don't talk about people like that. What have I told you? Besides, that is a rude way to describe your sister's girlfriend."

Glen does a spit-take, looking back and forth between the two girls before finally shrugging it off. "Meh, I always knew she was a muffin-lover."

***o*O*o***

**Lean On Me**

Everyone was clapping and cheering her on, turning it up a notch when she blew out the candle.

One whole year of sobriety down, the rest of her life to go.

Kat was there, and so was her brother. Her aunt Morgan was there.

But really, the only person she had eyes for was Ashley.

She'd heard that it was relatively easy for an alcoholic to become addicted to the person who'd "rescued" them for lack of a better term and for a while she thought that was all it was.

But then Ashley'd started coming by unannounced.

And then she gave her a key.

And then that one time, when Spencer had the stomach flu and looked God awful, Ashley came and spent the day in bed with her and she knew she wasn't just doing it out of obligation too because when she asked her how terrible she looked , Ashley merely laughed and said she looked beautiful.

No one could lie that convincingly.

"Congratulations baby," Ashley whispers into her ear, arms wrapping around her midsection from behind.

***o*O*o***

**N.I.T.**

The rectory is beautifully decorated in pale yellow and white, daisies lining the aisles and affixed to the folding chairs the guests are sitting on. It'd been a long road but they were finally here, standing before her God, ready to take on a new life, together.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join together in Holy matrimony Miss Spencer Carlin," Sister O'Malley bellows, her voice echoing throughout the gathering chamber as she turns to the blonde. "..and Miss Ashley Davies. Now, lassies, the bond of marriage is a sacred one and as such should not be entered into lightly. Do you understand?"

Ashley smiles at Spencer, holding her hands a little tighter. "We do," she answers for both of them.

Spencer smiles back, her eyes getting a little misty. Her mother is in the front row, _bawling _her eyes out. And Glen's there too and Clay, and also her father, smiling proudly.

Ashley's parents are sitting on the other side, her mother leaning into her father with glittering eyes.

Spencer lets her eyes drift back to Ashley's and she just feels so completely assured that everything in her life will work out fine. It's like God Him(or Her)self is embracing her, enveloping her in a warmth that is nothing short of serene. The words and sounds just fade away and all she can see in front of her is Ashley, the woman she's destined to spend the rest of her life with.

"…until death do you part?"

"I do."

***o*O*o***

**Don't Take It…Personal**

Ashley pulls back slowly and Spencer blinks a few times, getting her bearings back. "Wow," she whispers, eyes almost loopy.

Ashley grins and cradles her cheek.

"I mean," Spencer stammers stupidly, trying to find the words to describe what she's feeling. It's an inevitable fail though and even with all her brainpower dedicated to it all she can do is shrug and breathe out, "Wow."

"You said that already," Ashley gets out through a chuckle, pressing her nose against the blonde's.

"It's just that…we…and then you…and it was like…You ever read those romance novels?" Spencer finally asks, her ears turning red.

Ashley nods, thoroughly amused.

"It's like that…only, without all the sex. Not that I don't want there to be sex," she's quick to rectify and then her eyes widen. "And not like I do want sex. I mean, I'm not…easy or anything. But, I'm not hard…either?"

And the awkward talker award goes to…

"Oh my God," Spencer murmurs, bringing up her hands to bury her face in her palms.

Ashley chuckles again, pulling the blonde's hands away. "I get you," she says, smiling softly. "And I agree. The kiss was wow." She leans in again, watching as Spencer's eyes nearly cross trying to stay focused on her. "And now I'm going to do it again."

***o*O*o***

**30****th**** Birthday Depression**

Spencer shifted in bed, unwittingly pulling the covers off of her girlfriend.

Ashley was asleep beside her, lying on her stomach. One arm was pinned underneath the brunette, the other curled in on itself just under her chin.

Spencer couldn't believe it had been a whole year since that fateful night when she'd left that horrible house and that horrible relationship with that horrible man and never looked back.

She shifts again, moving the blankets to cover Ashley's shoulders once more and finds herself, brushing hair out of the brunette's face.

She smiles and leans down to press a gentle kiss to the woman's forehead. "I love you."

***o*O*o***

**About A Dame**

"Morning sugar," she says, her hand hovering over my face.

I can't believe I fell asleep and slept so soundly too. Guess this one has that effect on me.

"Morning," I mumble out, sitting up slightly. "Sleep all right?"

"Well enough," she shrugs, propping herself up sexily on my pillow.

There's no sense in lying. She looks good in my bed.

"So…Detective, what do we do now?" she asks me, that dangerous glint in her eyes.

I'm sure that look has ended wars and maybe even started a few others; that look is trouble incarnate and something inside me screams to stay far, far away.

But something else screams for me to just hold on tight for what's bound to be one hell of a ride.

Guess you can call me a risk-taker.

***o*O*o***

**Nerds**

"Carlin residence. Romeo speaking. Are you my Juliet?" Glen answers the phone, holding off Spencer fairly easily with an extended arm.

"Um…hi. This is Ashley…"

"Oh jeez," Glen groans, dropping the phone immediately. "Your dork is on the phone."

"She's not a dork, Glen," Spencer mumbles out, finally getting by him to get the receiver.

He rolls his eyes at her, throwing his hand. "Whatever. I'm bored. Don't drool all over the phone this time."

Spencer frowns at him pushing her glasses up on her nose before holding the phone up to her ear. "Hello?"

"Hi, Spencer," Ashley breathes across the line and Spencer's insides twist around funnily.

"Hi, Ashley," she replies, tugging nervously at her pocket protector. "What are you doing?"

"Postulating a new theory on harmonic frequencies," Ashley answers, snorting a laugh at the end. "What about you?"

"I just finished up my calculus project examining the correlation between higher levels of success rates in solving calculus problems and frequent exploiters of metacongnitive thinking strategies."

"Interesting," Ashley effuses.

"It is," Spencer continues excitedly. "it's basically a precursor to the research that confirms metacognitive thinking may be the reason children in other parts of the globe are performing at such higher levels than American kids in the major test areas of math, English, and science."

"I'm intrigued, Spencer. I'm sure you've done a great job," Ashley mumbles shyly.

Spencer's cheeks warm, and she twists her legs bashfully. "Thanks Ashley."

"Can I come over…and maybe see what you have?"

Spencer tries not to hyperventilate but she's reaching for the inhaler before she knows it, taking a few quick puffs. "That's fine."

"Great," Ashley breathes, chuckling dorkishly. "I'll see you soon."

***o*O*o***

**Oh. Em. Gee: A Meet & Greet**

"You little slut," Emily shrieks, flicking me on the arm.

"Ow," I laugh, looking around at the people that were suddenly looking at us. Trusting Emily to be discreet is like trusting George W. Bush to handle a war.

"Can you keep your voice down?" I hiss, pushing some of my hair back behind my ear nervously. "I don't need everyone knowing my business."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Emily says, eyes widened in mock repentance. "I didn't know it was such a big secret that you hooked up with the band!"

I grab her arm this time, pushing her into a dark corner just outside the venue. There were still quite a few people milling about and I didn't need any more ears. Besides, I needed to find out what she was so upset for.

"What is your problem?" I ask her, not getting her sudden rage.

"My problem?"

"Yes."

"_My _problem?"

Did I stutter?

"Yes."

"My _problem _is that you left me hanging out there all by myself, knowing how much I loved the band and then to top it all off, you slept with Aiden."

"What?"

"And don't even try to deny it. I know you had sex. It's written all over your face and frankly, you smell like it."

"Okay, first of all, I didn't abandon you. They picked me. Totally different and secondly, I didn't hook up with Aiden."

"Well, who'd you do?" Emily asks me, confused. "Please tell me you didn't do one of those fugly Fall Out Boys? Love their music but their faces leave little to be desired."

"No," I say, suddenly feeling shy. "It was…mghmy."

Emily just stares at me. "Can you say that one more time and this time take the eight balls of cotton out of your mouth?"

I roll my eyes. "It was Ashley, okay?"

Emily looks more confused than before. "The bassist? But isn't she a…"

I watch worriedly as the cogs fall into place and Emily's jaw drops before a devious smirks takes up permanent residence. "You little sneaky bitch," she grins, throwing an arm around my shoulder. "I always knew you were as straight as spaghetti until it gets wet."

***o*O*o***

**Left Behind**

"How about this one?"

Ashley laughs out loud again, clutching her stomach. "I don't get your infatuation with sweater vests, Spencer. It's unhealthy."

"I thought you said it was not fashionable," Spencer fires back, filing through the clothing rack.

"That too," Ahsley laughs, stepping up behind her.

Spencer smiles, feeling the other girl's hand slide around her waist, fingers looping into her empty belt loops. "Didn't your parents ever teach you about personal boundaries?"

She feels the brunette smile against the back of her neck, lips stalling there as she breathes out hot air. "My parents were hippies."

Spencer snorts, knowing that's the furthest from the truth and rocks them slowly from side to side.

"Aww, how domestic?" they hear some say, the sound just behind them.

Asley rolls her eyes and turns to the girl who'd made her life hell and basically forced her and her family to move. "Why won't you just leave us alone?"

"Because life is more fun this way," Madison sneers, cutting her eyes to the blonde next. "And to think, I was almost friends with you."

"Good thing you aren't," Sherry, Madison's minion, pipes up. "You might have caught the 'ghey'."

The two girls cackle and stalk off.

Ashley's breathing has picked up and she's holding on a little tighter to Spencer than normal. She turns the blonde around and sees the look in her eyes, instantly feeling ashamed.

Her arms let go of Spencer and she backs up a step, eyes to the ground. "I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry."

Spencer's hands shoot out to Ashley's, grabbing them and putting them back where they were. "I'm not."

***o*O*o***

**Lost in the Sands of Ti- I Mean, Egypt**

"Ashley?"

"Yes dear?"

"Why is there a camel in our backyard?" Spencer asks her as calmly as she can manage but if that thing gets anywhere near her begonias there will be hell to pay.

"I thought it would be a nice way to kick off our fifteenth year anniversary," Ashley beams proudly, clasping her wife's hand. "You remember how we met."

"Is this the same camel?"

"One and the same," Ashley assures her, patting the thing gingerly. The trainer had told her to be gentle or it would spit at her.

"Baby," Spencer says, voice softening but also slightly amused. "It's sweet and I love the thought you put into it…"

"But," Ashley interjects, wincing a little as the thing creeps closer to Spencer's garden.

"Yeah, but. There's a freaking camel in our backyard and it wants to eat my flowers," Spencer deadpans, laughter evident in her voice. "I'm afraid to move to be honest and it kinda stinks."

"I thought it would be romantic," Ashley pouts, kicking the ground a little to display her displeasure but then the camel grunted rather loudly and she and Spencer backed up a step. "Okay, maybe not romantic, per se."

"It's the thought that counts," Spencer reassures her, tugging Ashley's arm back when the camel steps forward again. "Now, let's go inside and call animal control before this thing eats us."

"Right behind you, babe."

***o*O*o***

**Oh, It's You**

Ashley walked onto set and immediately could sense something was up.

Everyone lacked that usual bounce to their step. Even the boom mic operators kept letting the mic sag into the shots.

Of course, usually when things like this happened there was really only one cause for the problem.

"Does this look like a fucking apricot to you? Does it? I specifically asked for an apricot. Not a peach. Not a fucking nectarine. Now, I don't care if you have to hop on a plane and fly to the fruit groves of Georgia and hand-pick one off of a fucking tree but I want my fucking apricot right, fucking, _now_!"

Ashley's eyebrows rose, wincing when the doors to Spencer's trailer slammed shut.

Five f-bombs in one day.

Someone was cranky.

The guy – prop man, poor fellow – on the receiving end of Spencer's tirade eyed the piece of fruit on his shirt angrily. Seems Spencer had mashed it during her rant.

The director looks visibly relieved to see Ashley and rushes over to her, giving her a knowing look.

"Rough day?" Ashley asks, smiling ruefully.

"I don't know what you did before. But you need to fix her or so help me God this horror movie is going to turn into a real life slasher," Wes states, so calmly that she almost believes him.

Almost.

She knocks on the blonde's trailer door and receives a muffled "Go away unless you come bearing apricots." She rolls her eyes and opens it anyway.

"I don't have apricots but I do have fruit gushers," Ashley tells her, holding up her hands in mock surrender.

Spencer sits up from her couch, looking disheveled but only in the way that makes her more beautiful than most people on their best day.

Lucky bitch.

Ashley sits down next to her. "Gimme 'em," she mutters, holding out her hand and Ashley tears open a pouch, rolling her eyes but obediently placing piece after piece into the blonde's open palm.

"Wes wants me to 'work out your kinks' so to speak. He threatened murder," she informs her, eating a sugary snack herself.

"Mmm," Spencer nods, scooting closer to Ashley on her couch. "You?"

"No. You," Ashley says, letting her eyes drift shut as her head drops back to the back of the couch.

She keeps them closed even as she feels Spencer working her leg over both of her, straddling her with ease. "We do have some time. And I do feel a little tight."

Ashley's eyes snap open suddenly, brown on blue. "Well, we'll see what we can do about that."

Later, Spencer was much less of a bitch on set. She was walking a little funny but that was neither here nor there.

***o*O*o***

**Some People Just Need Counseling**

"Can I ask you a question?"

"You can," Spencer grants smartly, sitting across from her at their dining room table.

Ashley smiles warmly. "May I?"

Spencer nods, smiling back as she takes a sip of her wine.

"Is sex a good springboard for a relationship?"

Spencer almost chokes on her wine. "Where did that come from?"

"I've just been thinking and, well, even though I know it's not just about the sex with us, not at all, a part of me wonders if maybe they'll be some bad karma because of _how_ we hooked up, you know?"

Spencer grins at her, putting down her glass. "Do you honestly want me to shrink you?"

"I honestly do," Ashley answers, scooting up closer.

"Typically, it's not good for relationships to start off as sex. Granted, there has to be some sort of sexual attraction for a relationship to even progress past the point of platonic intimacy but, usually, it's better to have a little build-up."

"See?" Ashley points, eyebrows raised and her eyes widened behind her wire-framed glasses. "I told you. We're doomed."

"I'm not worried about it," Spencer answers, going back to her dinner.

"Why?" Ashley asks, one eyebrow raised this time.

"Because we are the lone exception to the rule, sweetheart. We always are."

***o*O*o***

**Stop…in the Name of Love**

Ashley didn't know exactly how she had done it but now that she had, she couldn't really complain.

It's just that she wasn't supposed to let anyone have access to her keys but here she was letting Spencer handcuff her to the blonde's bed without putting up much of a struggle.

"God," Spencer whispered, running her hands down the length of Ashley's stretched out arms, over her collarbone, to rest on her breasts, kneading the soft flesh and feeling her harden under the attention. "You're so sexy."

"You're more," Ashley breathes out, her hips twisting in a vain effort to find some way to alleviate the pressure building in her gut.

"Uh, uh, uh," Spencer pulled her lower body back, her thigh just out of reach. "You have to be patient. Weren't you the one teaching me about taking my time?"

Ashley swallows thickly, trying to reply but coming up short when Spencer's all-too talented lips work on her neck, biting and sucking and leaving bruises she'd have a hard time explaining to the squad tomorrow.

"I've learned a few things from you officer," Spencer continues to say, one hand traveling further soft, sliding over ribs and a hip bone, finding purchase in tantalizing wet heat. She wastes no time in driving two fingers in deep, her lips finding Ashley's who moans into the kiss. "Like the importance of slowing down," she whispers, working her fingers in and out of Ashley at a maddeningly slow pace.

She kept it up until Ashley was thrashing beneath her, twisting around and begging for Spencer to "Stop teasing and fuck me!"

Spencer chuckled, placing a wet kiss behind Ashley's ear, still thrusting slow. "You know what else you taught me?"

"Spencer…" Ashley groaned, her voice warning.

"…when the exact right time is to speed it up."

Oh.

Shit.

***o*O*o***

**Special Delivery**

Spencer's eye cracked open with her face still buried into the couch cushion.

Maya was lying just across from her, her tiny fists pressing hard into her chubby cheeks.

"Please Maya," Spencer whispered, too exhausted to move. "Give Mommy five more minutes of peace. I promise I'll hold you all day."

But Maya drove a hard bargain because it started with a little gurgle, then there were a bunch of little half-sighs like she was just _preparing _for it, and lastly, the gasp and wail.

"Waaaaahhh!"

Spencer turned into the cushion some more – maybe about to cry and trying to figure out what it was Maya could possibly want now that she wasn't hungry, sleepy, wet, or gassy – when the doorbell buzzed, signaling a rather early morning visitor.

Spencer groaned full on now, looking over to Maya and grabbing her up gently, even though she was still frowning. "This is all your fault, you know," she tells the baby. "Because you wake up at ungodly hours of the night people naturally assume I do too."

"Whoseit?" she murmurs into the intercom and presses the listen button, lightly bouncing Maya in her arms.

"It's Ashley."

Spencer feels the smile on her face and can't check it before it comes, looking down to her daughter who had momentarily quieted at the other voice in the room. "Don't look at me like that," Spencer smiled, brushing a finger across the tiny girl's cheek. "You like her too."

"C'mon up," she said into the speaker, buzzing her in.

Then she looked down at her attire…and panicked.

She was still wearing an oversized t-shirt and also, she had started leaking.

Attractive.

She and Maya went into the bedroom and she hurriedly pulled things out of drawers, the baby more confused now than anything. Her mother was acting pretty strangely.

Somehow Spencer managed to tug on some shorts and switch her shirt without ever having to put Maya down which has to be some kind of Guinness world record and all before Ashley knocked on her apartment door too.

Woot!

"Hey," Spencer greets, tugging the apartment door open.

"Hi," Ashley smiles, stepping beside her to come in. She gives Spencer a brief hug, ever mindful of the baby. The she drops a kiss to the little tuft of hair on Maya's head. "Hey baby girl."

Maya frets a little but she quiets down rather quickly.

"What are you doing by so early?" she asks the brunette, leading her into the baby battle zone formerly known as her living room.

Ashley smiles, sitting down on the sofa right before the blonde. "Spencer, it's almost noon."

"No it is not," Spencer gasps, feeling around for her phone, finding it and letting her jaw drop. "I am sooo tired these days. My nights are running into my days."

"She not sleeping again?" Ashley asks, brushing a finger down the little girl's nose.

"It's like she thinks four a.m. is party time or something. Trust me Maya, you're not missing anything," Spencer tells her playfully, her statement punctuated by a yawn.

"You know, you can call me if you need help with her. I won't mind."

Spencer waves her hand at the other woman. "I don't want to be a burden."

"I want to, Spencer," Ashley tells her softly, scooting in closer. "It won't be a burden."

"Okay," Spencer says, reaching for the remote. "Wanna watch a movie? I wish I could get mad at her but she looks so cute when she's asleep. Even when it's five minutes after she's completely woke me up."

Ashley giggles and drapes her arm around Spencer' shoulder, pulling her closer. "Let's just watch the movie."

***o*O*o***

**Lap Dance**

Spencer moved her hips from side to side, trying to keep up with the music.

Ashley was sitting right in front of her, sitting on her hands and grinning like Tim Robbins.

Why, you ask?

Spencer was half-naked and gyrating mere inches in front of her, that's why.

Spencer turns to face her still moving and she bursts out laughing, not able to contain herself. "I feel like such a moron," she mumbles, all nervous laughter and flushed cheeks.

"Don't Spencer," Ashley whines, not wanting the show to end. "You were doing fine."

"You think?" Spencer asks her, brushing her hair behind her ear shyly.

"Duh," Ashley deadpans, reaching out to grab her.

"It's just…I don't feel sexy. I mean, like dancer sexy."

"Trust me Spencer," Ashley starts, tugging the woman to her with little resistance. "I have no complaints."

***o*O*o***

**Building Squares**

When I first saw her I thought she was crazy.

The second time I saw her I knew she was crazy.

And the third time, well, I knew it was love.

But, for the record, I still think she's crazy.

"Babe, have you seen my Leprechaun?"

Ashley's not really paying attention so that has to be why, right?

I mean, what other plausible reason would Spencer, her fiancée, be asking her about a leprechaun.

"Huh?" she asks, sitting up on the couch abruptly.

"My leprechaun," Spencer repeats, sounding like she's in the kitchen. "You know, my cereal?"

"Lucky Charms?" Ashley questions loudly.

"Yep, that's the one," Spencer shouts back before there's a loud crash sounding from the kitchen.

"Never mind, I found them," Spencer tells her, coming back into the living room like everything is just fine.

"Uh…where's the cereal?"

"Oh, I put it away. I just needed it for dinner tomorrow."

Ashley can only smile but then she remembers the noise. "What did you do to the kitchen?"

"Nothing," Spencer answers quickly, guilt flashing across her face. "Except…well, you remember how you said you wanted to take down that old cabinet by the fridge? I did it for you baby."

Ashley rolls her eyes and smiles in spite of herself, pushing off of the couch and grabbing Spencer to go with her.

"Where are we going?"

"To Home Depot."

***o*O*o***

**Blinded By Beauty**

"Okay, stop pushing me," Spencer said, laughing good-naturedly afterwards. "I can't walk that fast."

"Sorry, baby," Ashley grimaced, running around to the front of her. "Are you okay? What am I asking; of course you're not okay. You must be in pain. Oh man. Oh man."

"Ashley," Spencer giggled, reaching out for her wife. "Calm down and breathe sweetie. Now, I'm not hurting too much but we do need to get to the hospital quickly. Call a cab."

"They're going to take too long," Ashley shakes her head, vetoing that idea. "I'm gonna drive."

"Ashley, no," Spencer protests, feeling a contraction coming on. "You can't drive."

"I've got my license."

"You're legally blind."

"I can see just fine," Ashley fires back, hustling them to the car. "You're not having our baby in the driveway."

So, after an erratic drive down the expressway and guided by love and Spencer's screams they finally made it to the hospital, with only a few minutes to spare but it was all worth it when the doctor handed first one, then another baby to them.

"I'm so proud of you," Ashley whispers, dropping several little kisses to the crown of Spencer's head, smiling down at her wife as she cradles their two children.

That's the only thing she'll ever need to see.

***o*O*o***

**Bonnie & Claudia**

"Hey, hey…how about right there?" Ashley asks, pointing out of the window of their car.

There's a woman walking alongside the road, one baby in a carrier strapped to her front and two other kids hanging off her arm.

"Yeah. She'll do," Spencer says, pulling over.

"Hey!" Ashley yells out of the window, tossing out a plastic bag full of cash. "Spend it wisely!"

"So, we're like your modern day Robin Hoods?" Spencer asks her, peeling off down the street before anyone can make the car.

"Altruism at its finest baby."

***o*O*o***

**Tune Up**

Spencer smiles, tossing the magazine aside and rushing up to peek out of her window blinds.

Down in the lot she can see the motorcycle just pulling up, the rider snatching off her helmet and kicking down the stand.

Ashley takes out her cell phone and clicks a few numbers, putting the device up to her ear and Spencer's grin widens when she feels her back pocket vibrate.

"Hello," she answers, trying to keep the smile out of her voice.

"Hey babe," she watches Ashley say, the brunette smiling even as she towels her greasy hands off on a bandana. "You ready to go?"

"Just about. That's a pretty big smile you're wearing there."

Ashley looks up to her window and spots her, her smile softening as her face heats up.

"I could say the same to you," Ashley whispers into the phone, eyes locking onto the blonde's. "Now, hurry up. I want to go scare the crap out of your brother by showing up with you on the back of my bike."

Spencer ends the call and ducks out of the window, zipping up her leather jacket and putting on her specially designed helmet.

_Spashley Forever._

***o*O*o***

**My BFF's Wedding**

"I…don't understand."

It's moments like these when Ashley really dislikes the fact that her parents were so modern.

The minutes are ticking by soundlessly because every clock in their house is digital and that just makes this moment that much more oppressive.

It helps that Spencer's right here with her though, head held high and holding onto her hand like Ashley might just slip away if she doesn't.

She actually wouldn't mind that too much right now. What with the way her mother is staring at her as if she'd said she'd just given birth to a baby condor.

"I said," Ashley starts again, holding on tighter. "That I'm with Spencer now."

Christine blinks owlishly, the cocktail glass in her hand sweating as she held it, unmoving. "But…honey, Spencer's a woman," the older woman states quietly like the brunette doesn't know.

Ashley scoffs, her cheeks turning pink. "I know that, Mom. God." Spencer gives her a small smile and Ashley rolls her eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes Ashley, they'll get stuck that way," Christine admonishes in such a mom-like tone, it makes the other two laugh.

"Alright, so I just lost a little cool mom points with my initial comment, but, if this relationship is one you want to pursue honey, then it's fine by me."

"Thank you."

"I mean, it's not like I didn't experiment a little back in my day too."

Spencer almost cackles and Ashley's jaw drops comically. "_Mom_."

"What?" Christine shrugs, taking a small sip of her mixer. "I went to Brown. Everybody was doing it."

***o*O*o***

**Having My Baby**

Ashley could hear quiet crying on the other side of the door and she tried again (in vain) to wrench it open.

Sighing in defeat when the door wasn't somehow magically unlocked through sheer willpower, Ashley let her forehead press against the wood panel. "Spence…"

"Ashley, I am not going. People are going to stare at me like I'm some kind of freak and then I'll start breaking chairs like Gwyneth Paltrow did in that one movie with the _School of Rock_ guy."

"Spencer, that's ridiculous. No one is going to stare at you. Now, would you please, let me in?" Ashley mumbles, jiggling the door handle again.

She only got sniffles in response.

"Spence?"

"You…called…me….ridiculous." Spencer chokes out in between sobs.

"I did not call you ridiculous. I said that your theory was ridiculous and this situation is getting ridiculous. Now, either let me in the bathroom now so I can hug you and kiss you and tell you that you're the most beautiful mother to be in the world or stand back while I break the door down."

Ashley waits a few seconds but finally the lock clicks and she wastes no time in rushing into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.

Spencer's sitting on the closed toilet, her pants (her recently acquired three sizes too big pants) were unbuttoned across her swollen tummy.

Ashley walked over to her girlfriend, dropping to her knees right in front of her. "Baby, we're going to be late for dinner."

"But Ashl-"

Ashley interrupts her with a kiss, her hands coming to rest on the blonde's stomach. "I love you. Okay? And I love these little babies that are growing inside of you. I love your laugh and your smile and your mind. And, all the things you really hate right now I love because it's all connected to you and I love you."

Spencer's pouting lips turn up into a shy smile. "Yeah?"

"Definitely," Ashley smiles back. "We'll get you some maternity pants on the way and I'll kick anyone who looks at you too long in the throat."

"Even if it's my mother?" Spencer grins, letting Ashley take hold of her hands to help her up.

"Especially if it's your mother."

"_Hey._"

***o*O*o***

**Mental**

"Glen, go get Spencer and Ashley. Dinner's almost ready," Paula says, setting out the last of the silverware.

Glen grumbles because of course since he was the only one here without a date his mother had seen fit to make him her personal errand boy. He pushes up off the sofa, rolling his eyes as Todd Collins throws yet _another_ interception and trudges out of the back door, eyes searching for his sister and her girlfriend.

He had to admit that he'd had his doubts about this whole Ashley and Spencer thing, especially when you tie in all the factors of them meeting one another, but, they'd made it work. Or, at least, they'd lasted – which is more than he can say of any relationship he'd been in.

They're not immediately where he can see them, but he can hear them and they haven't cottoned on to his arrival, even though his feet are crunching the leaves beneath them.

They're in their old tree house, and Spencer's recounting story after story of how much trouble they'd gotten into in that place.

"…and here's where Glen fell and knocked out his two front teeth. Luckily they weren't his permanents or my mom might've knocked out a few more herself."

"I can totally see her doing that," Ashley says, running her hands over the aging woodwork. "How old was he?"

"Like seven, I think. He talked like Cindy Brady for like three months, though."

Ashley giggles and reaches for Spencer's hand, tugging her toward her. "C'mere."

"What?" Spencer smiles coyly, her eyes twinkling in the low light of a late November day.

"Can I tell you a secret?"

Spencer's smile turns softer and she brings her hands up to wrap around Ashley's shoulders. "Tree houses are made for secrets."

Ashley's eyes turn serious and she squeezes Spencer momentarily before forging on, her arms wrapped around her tightly. "I want to marry you," she whispers, and she's holding Spencer so tightly she can feel as well as hear the blonde gasp. "Can I?"

Spencer's stunned expression gives way to a beaming smile and glistening, happy eyes, and she throws her head onto Ashley's shoulder, hugging her and kissing her with the fervor of someone whose life depended on it.

She never got to answer though, because Glen bursts into the tree house, sobbing and wrapping them up in a huge bear hug. "Of course you can," he blubbers.

***o*O*o***

**The Playground**

They kissed long and hard, the crowd woo-ing and clapping and yelling.

The little kids on the swings blew out bubbles from the wands they were given and all the tiny orbs floated on the light breeze.

Spencer pulled back from Ashley, her eyes shining even more when Ashley's nose crinkles in that adorable fashion. "We di it," she whispers, holding on tightly to Ashley's hands.

"We did," Ashley whispers back, turning around to face their audience.

The entire neighborhood was in attendance, whooping in hollering like it was a contest and as they made their way down the clearance that was their aisle, they were bombarded by tiny pieces of candy.

Thankfully, it was all gummy candy.

***o*O*o***

**A Minor Twist**

It had taken a little longer to get to San Francisco than she'd anticipated, but when she finally did, boy was it ever worth it.

She'd ditched those boyish clothes and finally grew out her hair and Ashley couldn't get over how beautiful she was, even more so.

And they walked down the street holding hands and people gave them second glances but never third or fourth ones.

And they bought a house together and shopped together and went to dinner together and she'd never been freer to just…be ever before in her life.

And then they went to their first gay pride parade.

"Oh my God," Ashley gasped, discreetly pointing to the ass-less chaps man. "Look, Spencer."

"I see," Spencer laughs, tugging the brunette closer to her. There were a lot of people around.

Ashley looks over at Spencer, smiles at the look in her girlfriend's eyes. "I am so unbelievably happy I met you," she says, her voice nary higher than a whisper but Spencer hears her, the conviction in her tone rising over the din.

The blonde smiles, tugging her close and planting a kiss on expectant lips.

***o*O*o***

**Deal of a Lifetime**

Glen's walking just a few paces ahead of them, pretending the giant stick he'd picked up off the ground is a sword.

"How'd Johnny take the news?" Ashley asks, brushing her bangs out of her face.

Spencer shrugs, not really wanting to get into it. "He was cool. Said he was happy for me."

"That's good," Ashley says, nodding slightly. "I meant what I said, Spencer," she tells her quietly, not wanting Glen to overhear. "We both have demons. It's not going to be easy."

Spencer reaches over to grasp Ashley's hand, intertwining their fingers and smiling gently. "Good thing I don't do easy."

***o*O*o***

**Dance With Me**

Kyla's toweling off, panting lightly as the music is finally switched off.

Aiden collapses next to her, collapsing onto the mat and crossing his legs Indian style.

Ashley walks over, towel around her neck and water bottle at her lips. "Great class, yeah?"

"How…are you…still standing?" Aiden breathes, his tank top soaked through. "She's trying to kill us."

Ashley grins and jumps when a hand is unexpectedly suddenly at her hip. "How are you guys doing?"

"My legs are jell-o," Aiden says, putting his palms flat on the mat. Kyla collapses finally next to him, having finally caught her breath. "We're deader than dead but this one," she says, pointing at Ashley. "…must be a freak of nature or on crack because she's hardly breaking a sweat."

Spencer grins, her grip on Ashley's hip tightening as she subtly turns her head to the brunette, catching Ashley hiding a smile behind her water bottle. "Must be all those private dance lessons," she drawls, barely concealing anything.

"Must be," Ashley says, her eyes sparking dangerously.

"Uh oh," Kyla says, popping up instantly. "Eye sex. Last time I saw this I saw a side of my sister that one related to her should have never seen."

"Cool," Aiden grins, leering up at the pair before Kyla rolls her eyes and drags him away.

***o*O*o***

**Poker Face**

"Davies!"

Aiden and Ashley both look to the door to see a positively fuming Glen standing there, his hand flat against the oak slab he'd just slammed open.

"Start. Running," he grits out before lunging at her.

"Uh oh," Ashley says, moving behind her desk, using Aiden as a shield.

"What is your problem, bro?" Aiden asks, deftly avoiding Glen's attempts to grab Ashley.

"Uh, I dunno," Glen sardonically replies, tilting his head. "Maybe the fact that Ashley is screwing my little sister."

Ashley frowns. "Screwing is such a harsh term," she says and he growls before lunging for her again.

"Glen!"

They all swivel to find Spencer in the doorway now, hands on her hips and nostrils flared.

"Get out of here, Spencer."

"No, you freaking lunatic," she grumbles, stepping into the office and closing the door. "Sorry about this, Ash. It just slipped out and before I knew it I'm chasing my brother down the street in my AVEO."

"Don't apologize to _her_," Glen squeals, affronted.

"Glen. Listen to me. Yes, Ashley and I are sleeping together. But, that's not all it is," she tells him, keeping her voice calm and speaking slowly so that he can actually follow.

Pissed off Glen is very black and white.

There is no gray.

Aiden looks to Ashley curiously and the brunette's cheeks warm up under the scrutiny.

"Well," Spencer corrects, catching the look and misinterpreting. "At least for me."

Ashley feels Glen's eyes on her and she rolls hers, not really wanting to do this in front of him. But, she wants even more to wipe that look off of Spencer's face.

She walks over to the blonde, standing in front of her and Spencer smiles faintly, eyes staring directly into her own. "It's so much more than that to me Spencer," she tells her, pressing closer so that their foreheads are pressed together. "So much more," she repeats, her voice trembling with emotion. "I love you."

***o*O*o***

**You Don't Know My Name**

"Okay, okay, wait. I don't get it," Spencer says, sitting next to Ashley on the brunette's couch.

Madison's on the floor, sitting Indian-style in front of them and she groans at having to pause the DVR yet again.

"What don't you get?"

"So, after all that build up for Brittany and Santana and verbal smack down of Brittany by the boy in the wheelchair, we're supposed to believe that she's magically in love with him after he gives her what was probably a lice-infested comb?"

Ashley snickers and Madison just groans, not liking the judgment shining through Spencer's tone.

"It's not supposed to make complete sense, Spencer," Madison explains patiently. "It's a comedy set in high school. Nothing about that sentence should scream practicality."

"Sorry," Spencer murmurs, hiding a grin. "It must be the lawyer in me speaking up again."

"Well, please tell her to shut up because if I have to pause my show one more time…" Madison grumbles, pressing play on the remote.

The characters on the screen come to life, and Ashley scoots in closer to Spencer, tucking her legs underneath her as her head rests on the blonde's shoulder.

Spencer leans her head on Ashley's and the two hold hands, watching the drama unfold as Brittany talks to her Ken and Barbie.

"And how old _is_ she actually? Because they're treating her like a ten-year old and if that's the case the whole thing with Artie is really freaking creepy."

Madison groans loudly.

***o*O*o***

"Ashley?"

The light is beginning to fade and the brightness more or less dims, and she feels as though she's moving but, looking down, her feet are still planted firmly on the ground.

"Ashley, is that you?"

It finally settles; the whirling images around her and she sees the sun, the flowers in full bloom on either side of her.

And she sees her, standing there looking as radiant as ever in a long white flowing sundress, a halo of daisies propped onto her long blonde hair. "There you are. What took you so long?"

Ashley smiles and takes a step to her, finding her pace quicker than it had been of late and the soreness in her limbs completely gone. "I've only been gone a little while," she says, catching up to Spencer and lacing their fingers together, her hands devoid of the wrinkles her years on earth afforded her.

"Feels like longer," Spencer tells her, smiling brightly and brushing some of Ashley's brunette curls out of her face. "I love you," she says, leaning in to give her a kiss.

"I've always loved you," Ashley echoes, holding onto the love of her life in their garden.


End file.
